Aftershock (34 page)

She’d texted Rick when she got to the airport in Tampa and again when she landed. His answer to her was simple and direct.

Butch fixing. ILY.

How could he love her when she’d damaged the thing he’d worked so hard for? She didn’t even know what to say to him so she just ignored the message.

Finally, they reached her place and Linc followed her inside, carrying her suitcase.

He nodded at her living room. “Let’s sit down and chat a little.”

“If it’s all the same to you, I don’t think I’m up to much conversation right now.”

He studied her face. “Don’t do anything rash, Sydney. I’ve been in this business a long time and ridden out a lot of rough spots.” He looked at his watch. “I have some things I need to take care of right away, but tomorrow we’ll talk. And, Sydney? This will all work out. Count on it.”

“Can you just answer a question for me?”

“Sure. Fire away.”

She curled her hands into fists. “How come I never heard of Macey Schreiner doing this kind of thing before? I’ve worked for you for a long time. Assisted other agents. Wouldn’t I have heard something?”

“Butch and I have been back and forth on this. We’ve spoken to some other managers and publicity agents this morning and we all agree on one thing. The woman has been a pimple on our ass for a long time. I’m sure you know there’s a lot of sex behind the scenes in the entertainment business. As long as it doesn’t screw things up, no one bothers about it.” He rubbed his chin. “But she’s never used her power as a weapon like this before. You got under her skin.”

“I’m sorry.” She didn’t know what else to say.

“No. Nothing to be sorry for. But we can’t allow her to ruin anyone just because her sex-for-publicity plan was thwarted. And we won’t. That’s why I’m telling you not to make any rash decisions.”

“I appreciate that very much, but I think I’d better take a really big step back here. Reexamine my priorities. All this isn’t doing the agency or the band any good. Or me.” She stood up. “So I thank you for everything, but I think I need to move on.”

“Tomorrow,” he insisted. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”

She just shook her head and, with as much courtesy as she could muster, ushered him to the door. She knew he could spin this so it wasn’t so bad. But that didn’t mean it would go away. The Plan suddenly didn’t seem quite so important, not when a bitch like Macey could derail it with a few words. And Rick? Right now, that all seemed like a dream. She’d allowed herself to believe in the fairy tale. To think she could have it all.

What a joke.

No matter what Linc said, it would be weeks before this died down. Before those pictures of her and Rick stopped circulating. And who knew when they’d pop up again?

She held it together until she closed and locked the door. Then she simply collapsed on the floor and let the tears come.

***

“She won’t answer my calls or even my texts.” Rick sat opposite Butch, holding his cell phone, watching it as if he could literally make it chime.

“She’s been hurt and embarrassed,” Butch reminded him. “She was living a dream she worked very hard to realize and someone came along and threw mud on it. That’s not easy to take. On top of it all, she feels she did damage to you and the band.”

“The band will survive,” he insisted. “This isn’t the first so-called scandal in the business and it certainly won’t be the last.”

“True. But this was Sydney’s first solo gig as an agent. The success is beyond anything anyone could have predicted. Just as Lightnin’ has had their goal for a long time, she’s had hers. She thinks she’s ruined it by allowing herself to get involved with you.”

“There are two people in this,” Rick pointed out. “She didn’t do it all by herself. And by the way, I had to do a lot of convincing to break down all those walls she’d built around herself.”

“I understand. But, right now, she’s taken all the blame on her shoulders and you won’t be able to reason with her. We need to let the dust settle.”

“My feelings haven’t changed, and I don’t think hers have, either.”

“Despite all our efforts, those pictures are still popping up here and there. Especially the one at the balcony window. That’s not easy to get past.”

“Damn it.” Rick pushed himself out of the chair. “She’s the innocent in all this. They should blame me. I was the one who convinced her we could have it all. Stupid, stupid, stupid.”

“You
can
have it all.” Butch spoke in a very calm voice. “It will just take some getting there. And the new rush of promotion is a big help. ‘Take the High Road’ was an instant hit, just like ‘Music Lady.’ The numbers are great. Merchandise sales are zooming. And you know how well the concerts have done.”

“She worked damn hard on this,” Rick reminded the other man. “Now she doesn’t even get to enjoy it.”

Butch shoved his hands in his pockets. “Syd’s been with Full Moon since high school when she worked as an intern. I don’t know how much you know about her family history—”

“I know about her folks and her aunt,” Rick broke in. “And what a bitch the woman was to her.”

“Everything Sydney got, she worked twice as hard for as anyone else, in an effort to prove herself. Now she sees herself as a failure. Let her have some breathing room. At the moment we need to focus on the band. I promise you this will all work out.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” He stared out the window, wondering how he would get past the pain in his heart. Or if he ever would. “We’ll be home in another couple of days, right?”

Butch nodded. “And in the studio to cut the rest of the album.”

“I want to see her.”

“I understand. But she thinks she’s doing the right thing by staying away from you. Linc and I have a plan. Give us a chance to put it in place, okay?”

For Rick, though, every day he was separated from Sydney was agony. He hoped whatever plan the guys had would work. Soon. Because, without Sydney, the rest of this meant nothing.

***

Sydney hadn’t realized a week could pass so slowly. Maybe if she’d been able to sleep or do something to occupy her time, it would have helped. But every time she closed her eyes, images of her nights with Rick rose up to haunt her. She could feel his skin next to hers, taste him on her lips. Her body and her heart cried out for him and she couldn’t seem to make the pain go away. Rick called and texted constantly, but she couldn’t bring herself to respond to him.

She had begged Linc not to call her any more. Her decision was firm. She’d faxed him her resignation, and she was done. Of course she had no idea what she would do with the rest of her life. She was probably poison in the business. Maybe she could change her name. Or something.

Emma called and texted and even came by a couple of times, but Sydney didn’t have the energy to get involved in a discussion.

“He loves you,” Emma told her the last time she stopped by. “He’s absolutely miserable.”

“He’ll get over it. He doesn’t need me around to remind everyone of that stupid photo.”

“Sydney, you’re the only one hung up on it right now,” Emma protested. “Butch and Linc are handling everything. And the band is just doing killer.”

“I should have listened to my aunt,” Sydney told her. “She said you had to make a plan and stick to it if you wanted to be somebody and ‘not let some man push it off the rails.’”

“Ohmigod!” Emma threw up her hands. “Rick didn’t do anything here.”

“No, I did, but it happened because I let myself fall in love with him.”

“Do you hear yourself?” Emma argued. “
Let
yourself fall in love? There’s no letting. It happens. And you’re going to turn your back on the best thing to happen to you. For what?”

Sydney turned on her in anger. “Don’t you get it? That picture will never go away. Everyone will think of me as a slut. They’ll always believe Rick could have done better, and the agency will suffer the fallout.”

“I don’t believe this.”

Emma had left, at last, and apparently figured she’d done her best because she stopped calling.

When Rick, too, stopped texting or calling, she knew they’d reached a milestone.

She surfed the web daily, hungry for news of the band. Devoured every tidbit. Their concerts drew rave reviews again. “Take the High Road”
was headed for the top with
“Music Lady.”
Whoever Linc had sent out to replace her, it seemed had things under control.

See? They don’t need you after all
.

According to the entertainment reporters, Lightnin’ was back in the studio and the contracts had been signed for them to join Deep Blue River on the rest of the tour. She scoured every site for any publication of the photos but apparently Linc had worked some kind of magic because, like magic, they disappeared. Instead all the chatter was about the hot new band. About Lightnin’ and their exciting music. About their two singles zooming up the charts.

Someone at the office continued to handling the social-media platforms. She checked them every day, thrilled at the amount of traffic and sad that she was no longer a part of it. At least, she thought, she’d stopped crying every five minutes. That was something. At some point she’d have to decide what to do with the rest of her life. She couldn’t spend it hiding at home. She just needed to wait long enough that the whole nasty episode had completely died.

Although she wasn’t sleeping, getting up in the morning was becoming harder and harder to do. Yet, lying in bed didn’t do anything except depress her even more. She was standing in the kitchen one morning in the old shorts and faded T-shirt she’d dragged on, hair pulled back in a messy ponytail, when the doorbell rang. With a halfhearted swipe at the stray hair on her cheek, she opened the door and nearly fainted.

“Hello, Sydney.”

Shock immobilized her. She was sure every bit of blood had drained from her body and, for a scary moment, she thought she might faint. Then she wondered if she was hallucinating. She hadn’t had a face-to-face with Janine in ages. Years, maybe. Not even a telephone conversation. The woman looked nearly the same as Sydney remembered her, well put together, every hair in place, makeup meticulous. But age had carved lines in her face and her eyes were filled with regret.

For a long moment Sydney was speechless, unable to do anything but stare. What was going on here? “How did you find me?”

“You are listed in the phone book, you know.” Janine gave her a half smile. “However, a friend of yours gave me the address.” Her fingers tightened on her purse. “It wasn’t easy for me to come here, Sydney. May I come in?”

“Oh. Um, yes. Of course.” She stepped back from the doorway. “Would you like a cold drink? Coffee? Tea?” What did you serve someone who had made your life so unpleasant you’d had to carve them out of it? And who then showed up out of the blue.

“Nothing, Thank you.” She walked into the living room and sat down. “Come sit with me, Sydney. I have some things to say to you. Things I should have said a long time ago.”

Here it comes. Raking me over the coals for what happened. I’m no better than my mother. Blah, blah, blah. Just what I don’t need
.

“If it’s all the same to you, I don’t think I’m up to a confrontation right now. You were right. Is that what you want to hear from me? Okay, I’ve said it. Now you can go.”

“That’s not what this is about. I promise. Please. Sit.”

Sydney perched on the edge of one of the armchairs, her body rigid. “Okay, I’m sitting. I have no idea why you’re here.”

Janine studied her, a sad expression on her face. “To offer an apology I should have given years ago.”

Apology? Did she hear that right?

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m sure you don’t.” Janine stared out the window. “I’ve lived with bitterness for so long, I can’t seem to get rid of it. And it seems I’ve poisoned your life, too.”

“What—”

Janine held up a hand. “I know you’ve heard me more times than you can count tell you the story of your mother and father. And me. The problem is, I was so very bitter, so angry, I never stopped to realize what your father and I had wasn’t the real thing. And I hated it when I saw him with your mother. I was insanely jealous. I thought I had my revenge by turning you against happiness, just as I’d turned myself.”

“But you always said—”

“I know what I said. I was wrong and I’ve had to live with it all these years. It robbed me of the pleasure of a relationship with you and probably of ever letting love into my life.” She sighed. “You have some very good friends, Sydney. A woman named Emma and the people you work for. They care about you a great deal. I wish I had someone who cared about me that way. It may be too late for me but not for you.”

Sydney frowned. “I don’t understand. Do you know what happened?”

Janine made a face. “Of course I do. Some worthless piece of trash is trying to kill your reputation and your romance. Do not let that happen.”

“Excuse me?”

“It seems you have the opportunity for both things that I didn’t—a successful career as well as a man who loves you. Not one you just expect to love you. The people you work for think very highly of you. And your young man sent someone to plead his case very well.”

Her jaw dropped. “Rick came to see you?”

“No. A young lady named Emma did. I wish I had a friend who cared as fiercely for me as she does for you.”

“But you always said—”

Janine waved a hand in the air. “I know what I always said. It’s taken me all these years to admit I was wrong. Everything came so easy to your mother. She was smart, beautiful, people loved her. I had to work twice as hard at everything.”

Sydney frowned. “I don’t understand.”

A look of utter sadness washed over Janine’s face. “No, I don’t suppose you do. From the time we were kids, I had it in my mind I had to compete with her. Our parents certainly didn’t make me feel this way. I don’t know why I felt that way, but I just did. When I met your father, I thought, at last, someone who wants me first. But then he met your mother and I never had a chance.”

Sydney was puzzled. “Didn’t you ever meet anyone else? You’re smart. Good looking. Savvy. I don’t understand.”