Albatross (15 page)

Hard Truths

             
Deacon left that same morning to go and collect his car from where he had abandoned it, parked by the bay. Jen had work that afternoon at The Rusty Oak, and he’d said he had work to do too.

              Jen was just stepping out of the shower, wringing the worst of the water out of her hair with a towel, when a familiar voice startled her, making her nearly jump out of her skin.

              “Long time no see, Jenny.” Clare’s voice sounded from across the room, carrying an icy hint to its tone as she spoke.

              “Oh my God!” Jen gasped, snapping her head up to see her older sister standing in the doorway, leaning casually against the wall in blue jeans and a bright yellow T-shirt, her arms folded in a most dissatisfied manner.

              It took Jen a moment to compose herself.

              “You scared the life out of me Clare!” She finally managed, quieting her skipping heart.

              “Not yet.” Clare replied in a stony voice with an entirely unreadable expression, her words strange. “Not quite.”

              Jen looked at her older sister suspiciously.

              Something wasn’t right.

              “What’s wrong?” She asked instinctively, presuming whatever it was that was bothering Clare, she would tell her.

              But it seemed that was not the case.

              “You look well.” Clare commented then, eyeing her younger sister purposefully, and even somewhat menacingly.

              “Ermm, thank you…” Jen replied, smiling warily as she covered her naked body with her towel, wrapping it round herself so that Clare could not see.

              Indeed, she did look very well.

She had been eating, she had been active; her figure was returning.

She had been happy.

              “It wasn’t a compliment.” Clare replied harshly, and before her younger sister even had chance to consider a response, she uncrossed her arms and slipped through the doorway and out of sight, making not a sound as she left.

              Jen was left standing with her mouth slightly agape in shock, clutching at her towel that was wrapped round her still, dripping water on the cold, laminated floor.

              That had come as quite the surprise, and Jen had absolutely no idea how to react.

              “Cl…Clare…!” She eventually called after her sister, staggering to the bathroom doorway and glancing around, but Clare was nowhere to be seen or heard.

              Jen had been abandoned, it seemed, and a wave of guilt flushed over her, rightly or wrongly so. But the guilt she felt was for many different things, and she couldn’t help but allow it to eat away at her.

              “I can’t believe you!” Clare yelled at her sister, about an hour or so later, raising her voice perhaps louder than she’d intended.

But then again, perhaps not.

              Clouds swarmed above as Clare ranted.

That morning had brought with it surging downpours that had left the fields and the beaches soaked through. As Jen walked water sloshed around her shoes and the ground squelched beneath her feet.

              Though the ground was saturated, it was no longer raining, but still, an entirely different type of downpour barraged Jen during that walk to The Rusty Oak, as she tried desperately to fend off her older sister’s abuse.

              “What!?” Jen implored, spreading her hands defensively and almost even flinching at Clare’s words.

              “You’re being ridiculous!” Clare demanded, as if that explained everything. “Are you being a bitch on purpose!? Don’t I mean anything to you!?”

              “What!? Clare! No…” Jen tried to justify to her sister, but Clare was having none of it.

              “I don’t really care what you’ve got to say!” She declared. “I know exactly what’s going through that head of yours!”

              Naturally.

              “It’s not even been a week!” She pressed cruelly. “He appears, and all of a sudden I mean absolutely jack!!”

              “No…Clare…” Jen attempted futilely, but it was no use.

              “You’ve changed, Jenny.” Clare warned, her words growing grave and ominous. “You’re not the same. He’s been around barely a few days, and already you’re a different person.”

              Finally, Jen had had enough.

              “Maybe it’s for the better…” She bit back at Clare.

Though there was fight, and even truth, in her words, there was not the same spite, and she was still timid in Clare’s presence, especially when she was on one like this.

              “OH!” Clare exclaimed. “Really!? Is that what you think is it!?” Her eyes bore into her younger sister cruelly and her words spat venomously through the damp air.

              “I…” Jen started timidly, her fear of upsetting Clare further getting the better of her.

              But her older sister didn’t let her finish.

              “FINE!!” Clare shrieked brashly. “If that’s how you feel, then I want no more to do with you!!”

              And with that Clare whipped round, spinning instantly on her heel, and stormed away, back towards Keepers Cottage.

              “But…” Jen’s words trailed off, failing her as dejection set in as she watched her sister leave her, and not for the first time.

              It was no good.

              She just kept screwing everything up.

              Surely it would only be a matter of time before Deacon realised that, and then he would leave her too.

              But then, in only a matter of moments, out of nowhere, for Jen hadn’t seen her return, Clare was in her face once again. She pressed her nose right up to Jen’s, barely inches away, boring her angry gaze into hers, and breathed words at her dripping in molten hatred.

              “What are you going to do now then, sis!?” She hissed through bared teeth, her features animalistic as anger surged through her.

              Jen had never seen her sister so livid, and it terrified her. Although, not more than the prospect of her leaving again.

              “What do you mean?” Jen managed, flinching back.

              Clare wouldn’t relent.

              “What are you going to do about Deacon!?” Clare pressed cruelly.

              Jen’s answer was reactive and immediate, and she barely thought about her words before they rolled off her tongue, for this answer at least came very naturally to her.

              “Whatever feels right…” She replied in an instant, as if the answer was obvious.

              “NO! You idiot!” Clare berated her. “That’s not what I mean!”

              “What then!?” Jen begged, desperately craning her neck and body back away from her older sister, but Clare clutched at her tightly and wouldn’t let her go, even though she couldn’t touch her physically.

              “You know what I mean…” She insisted quietly, brutally, her voice a threatening growl and her eyes hard and stern, forceful.

              “I…I can’t…” Jen stammered, indeed knowing exactly what Clare meant.

              “You have to.” Clare breathed, cutting off any other option.

              “I already told him about dad leaving us!” Jen protested then, as if Clare was asking of her something she’d already done.

              “No one cares about that!” Clare exclaimed, releasing Jen suddenly from her invisible grasp and throwing her arms up in exasperation.

              Jen recovered slightly, straightening, though she still took a few wary steps back, and the clouds above circled in over her head.

              “He was an arse!!” Clare declared. “You hate him! So what!?”

              Her words were harsh, though not really all that far from the truth, but Clare would not let up, and she barraged Jen yet even further.

“That’s not important!” She yelled. “You have to tell Deacon everything! And I mean the truth about what’s really going on! Not just some dead and buried news about some arsehole father!!”

“But I…” Jen weakened, her voice dropping, and Clare interrupted again.

“BUT YOU WHAT!?” She practically screamed. “BUT YOU CAN’T!? You already told him one dead and buried story!! Now tell him the other one!!”

“I can’t…” Jen almost cried, her will breaking beneath Clare’s wrath.

“YOU HAVE TO!!” Clare shrieked, reaching entirely new octaves. “HE NEEDS TO KNOW!!”

“STOP IT!!” Jen screamed, shattering entirely, covering her ears to block out Clare’s cruel words, but of course it made no difference.

She sprinted off towards The Rusty Oak, desperate for salvation from her older sister.

Desperate for salvation from everything.

But Clare pursued her, not even needing to run to keep pace with her.

Jenny would never escape.

The Rusty Oak came into view as Jen ran, her legs churning and her heart racing, driven by fear and by adrenaline.

Warm and welcoming amidst the grey haze of the heavy air hanging all around, and the clouds flooding overhead, Jen didn’t let up even once as she stormed towards the rustic inn.

“JENNY!!” Clare called again, just as her younger sister burst through the heavy, wooden front door to the pub. “You haven’t got a choice!!”

“LEAVE ME ALONE!!” Jen cried as she exploded into the foyer of The Rusty Oak, and all heads turned and eyes snapped to her in an instant.

She hadn’t thought about that…

How on Earth was she going to explain this?

“He’ll find out eventually!” Jen heard Clare’s fading voice call through the slowly closing door, but her attention was no longer on her sister, as bodies swarmed around her in moments.

“Jen!?”

“Are you okay!?”

“What’s wrong Jen!?”

“Has something happened!?”

A dozen and more voices fired questions at her. If she had not been shaken before, she certainly was now.

Flushed and out of breath from running, Jen couldn’t draw air enough to reply to them all, and so they multiplied, growing in concern, and crowded around her even further still.

“Are you hurt!?”

“Is someone chasing you!?”

“Who was it!?”

“What’s happened!?”

              All of a sudden the flurrying questions, when they didn’t receive appropriate answers, turned into decisive statements.

              “Quick! Someone look outside!”

“Catch them before they get away!”

“Call the police!!”

That final voice suddenly drove Jen into desperate action. As overwhelmed as she might have been, the police getting involved again was the last thing she needed right now.

“No!” She cried, managing only a single syllable, still trying in vain to catch her breath. “No, no! It’s fine!” She tried to calm and quiet them. “It’s not that!” She reassured them as best she could, though, obviously, they didn’t believe her.

“What is it then, Jen?” Laura asked her immediately, cutting through the teeming crowds like a shark parts the waves towards its prey.

Today she wore an angry, red jumper, and her words were direct and filled with concern.

“It’s…I, it’s not that…” Jen attempted, her answer vague and her voice shaky, though she was glad to be speaking to just Laura.

But she wasn’t buying it.

“Jen.” She said then, looking at her with serious eyes. “You must tell us if it’s, you know…”

“No!” Jen almost cried, restraining her outburst right at the last moment. “It’s not, I promise!”

“Well…” Laura considered, though she was clearly unconvinced. “Okay…”

The teeming throngs glanced around at each other nervously, unsure exactly what to do, all frozen in their tracks.

“Honestly.” Jen tried again, this time a little more assertively, her breath coming back to her enough to summon a more convincing voice to lie with. “It’s not. I swear. It was just one of my friends. We just had an argument, that’s all…”

“Right, well, if you’re sure…” Laura confirmed hesitantly, and when Jen nodded, as convincingly as she could manage, the crowd that had gathered began to disperse begrudgingly back to their drinks and their food.

But Laura was not finished with her, and she pulled Jen off to one side and through into the kitchens, clearly having only agreed with her to help part the crowd.

“What happened, Jen!?” She pressed, her voice a hushed and persistent whisper.

“It was just a disagreement with one of my friends.” Jen lied again.

“That boy!?” Laura questioned then, and edge to her voice.

“What? Oh no! Not Deacon!” Jen reassured her, smiling as best she could, pleased actually to not have to lie about something for a change.