All For Anna (20 page)

Was there some sort of
protection clause in their friendship?

Briggs pointed out a
few crazy dancers who had obviously had way too much to drink, but were trying
to line dance nonetheless. I laughed till it hurt as Briggs imitated their
unique moves. The next song was a ballad from a Broadway show I had never seen,
and she was amazing. Her notes held and peaked at just the right moments giving
me goose bumps. For a second, I felt bad that Kai would have to follow such an
act.

Briggs must have sensed
my unease for Kai. He laughed and said, “Just wait, Tori, he’ll be fine.”

Kai took the stage. He
was confident as he picked up the microphone and stared into the crowd.

“This is for you,
Pele
.”

My breath caught in my
throat. I recognized the tune as soon as it started. It was a pop hit by one of
my favorite artists. I knew the song well.  

Kai started it
flawlessly, moving to the beat and singing in a way I couldn’t have imagined.
Even though I had heard him sing next to me at church, nothing I had heard
compared to this. This was a performance. He was more than gifted, he was
absolutely incredible. People all over the room watched him and participated. I
was mesmerized. When he got to the last chorus the room went wild.

I could feel Briggs
looking at me for a reaction, but I couldn’t take my eyes off Kai. He walked
toward me, looking like a superstar. Dozens of people were patting him on the
back and praising his talent, but he never once diverted his eyes. He hit
Briggs on the shoulder, as if indicating his approval for standing by me, and
then took my hand.

“You ready to get out
of here?” he asked me.

“But...don’t you want
to see if you won?”

“Nah. That’s not why I
did it. Come on, there’s something I want to show you.”

The valet brought Kai’s
truck around and we headed in the direction of Stacie’s house, although I knew
that wasn’t our destination. It was already past ten, but I didn’t want the
night to end. We parked at a playground and walked together on a paved path,
our hands brushing as we strolled.

There were several
street lights that illuminated the old wooden play structure and swings, but
beyond that it was pitch black. I slowed my steps, thinking we would stop
somewhere in the light, but he kept walking. I followed.

When the path ended, I
paused. Stacie’s heels would not be fond of walking though the grass. Hitching
my dress up a few inches, I took one careful step forward up on the balls of my
feet. My foot never made contact with the ground however, Kai lifted me up into
his arms before it could.

How does he do that so
easily?

“I’m very capable of
walking Kai,” I said, embarrassed.

“I know, but that takes
all the fun out of it for me,” he said, laughing.

After just a few yards
of walking he set me down. A large tree with a trunk as wide as four men stood
before us. I touched it, making sure I was seeing it correctly in the darkness
of night.

“This is my spot,” he
said.

“Your spot?”

“Yes. I teased you the
first night we met at your parent’s house, about finding the bridge in the
dark, remember? You’d gone there to get away from your party, I’m guessing to
think and re-group, but I also have a spot I could easily find in the dark,” he
said, touching the tree.

I remembered that night
well. It was the first time I had seen him, which now felt like ages ago. So
much had happened since those first days in Dallas.

“Why do you come here?”
I asked softly.

“To think, pray...talk
to my dad,” he said, reflecting.

“When did you find it?”
I asked.

“A few years ago, after
a bad call at work. I needed to process, spend some time alone—pray,” he
admitted.

I knew I should have
felt uncomfortable or awkward by his statement of faith, but I felt neither. I
knew he meant it. I also knew he really believed he could talk to and hear from
God. Who was I to judge that?

“It’s a great spot,
Kai.”

I walked around the
base of the trunk, careful not to trip on the large exposed roots that rose
above ground.

“Well, it’s not just
mine anymore...I want to share it with you. It’s much closer to Stacie’s than
your parent’s bridge, and I know how important it is to have a place to get
away to and think, in quiet.”

I looked up at his face
in the moonlight.

“That’s incredibly thoughtful.
Thank you,” I said.

“It’s only two miles
from Stacie’s—an easy distance for you to run,” he said, smiling.

I laughed. He knew I
hadn’t intended to stop running after my brush with heat exhaustion. He picked
me up again, and carried me to the path.

Once at Stacie’s he
turned off the engine and walked me to the door. I hated that this night had
ended.

He held out his hand to
me, I took it willingly.

“Tori, may I ask your
dad for his blessing to date you, officially?” he asked.

When will this man stop
surprising me?

It took me a few
seconds to process his words, but when I did there was nothing but clarity that
remained.

“Yes,” I said.

Kai leaned in and
kissed me tenderly.

“Good-night,
Pele
”.

I walked inside the
house and closed the door. Peeking through the fogged glass I watched him drive
away. The second he was gone from view, I let the giddy squeal that had built
up inside me escape. It was then that I realized I was not alone.

My squeal was not a
solo, but a
duet
. 

Stacie was right behind me in the dark
entryway.

After hitting snooze
several times, I opted to skip my morning run. Chatting with Stacie until
the wee hours of the morning had been my undoing.
Girl talk
was still
alive and well between us.

I told her everything I
could remember: the decor, the lighting, the food, the entertainment, the kiss,
the dance, the song. Stacie “oohed” and “aahed” like I was the best storyteller
in the world, though in reality, I was a terrible one. Good story tellers
didn’t need the continuous prompting of questions in order to keep talking…I did.

I hesitated only once
during the course of our conversation.

Deciding
if
I
would tell Stacie about seeing Johanna was an internal battle, to say the
least. However, without that information, the climax of my evening with Kai
never would have happened. Honestly, I still wasn’t sure why it had happened,
but I wouldn’t trade that kiss for anything—well, almost anything.

In the end, I told her,
although I deflected her immediate sympathetic responses. I didn’t want to go
back to those feelings. Two conversations with Johanna in one lifetime were
enough. Her words haunted me.

I had quickly forwarded
the conversation on to what I knew Stacie would classify as “the good stuff”.
That was indeed what she had called it. She was a sucker for romance. Hallmark
had nothing on her.

Stacie covered her
mouth with one hand, letting her tears fall freely as I retold the scene on the
deck. It had been a magical moment, a dream. Kai knew the ugliest part of
me—who I was, what I’d done, yet instead of running from me, he pulled me
closer.

He was a walking
conundrum.

**********

The wait in the Obstetrician’s
office was relatively short. Once Stacie fulfilled her duty to donate a urine
sample, we were escorted back to the ultrasound room. Stacie’s nervous chatter
ended when the wand began roaming over her belly. I held her hand.

Once Stacie was
comfortable, I started the recoding for Jack. The baby was full of energy. We
laughed several times as we watched this little gymnast perform.

The tech went over each
measurement with quick precision and clocked Stacie at exactly twenty weeks.
She was half way, which meant Jack would be home in just over three months.
Sometime in early February, a baby would be welcomed home as well.

As Stacie cleaned
herself up and got dressed, the tech took me into the hall and whispered in my
ear. My smile was automatic when she told me the gender. I’d never had a
preference of course, neither had Stacie, but there was something about this
knowledge that made it even more real. The naming, planning, and nursery colors
would all fall into place with that one bit of information.

I made Stacie drop me
off at Target on our way back home, telling her to stay in the car while I ran
inside. My plan had developed into a mini masterpiece. I would find an
appropriately gendered outfit, wrap it, and let Stacie unwrap it with Jack on
the video call. It was their moment to uncover. I was happy just to have played
a part in it.

I purchased the outfit
and took a minute to arrange it in the non-descript gift bag, then walked back
out to the car. Stacie was chomping at the bit with anticipation. I couldn’t
blame her.

She
waited—semi-patiently—for Jack to call once we arrived back at the house. When
I handed her the bag, she screamed in delight and quickly waddled her way
upstairs to the computer. I waited downstairs; excited to hear them discover
the news together. I had exactly thirty minutes before I needed to leave for
work, so I busied myself by packing my bag and changing my shoes.

Then I heard it (so did
the whole neighborhood I was pretty sure).

“A girl! We’re having a
GIRL! Get up here, Tori!” Stacie yelled from her bedroom.

I ran up the stairs
into her bedroom. The picture of this man and wife was priceless. Jack was full
screen, choking back tears while Stacie was a full-fledged mess of excited,
crying energy. Jack thanked me for helping them have this moment together. I
was overcome by his sensitivity—my
brother
. He adored Stacie, just as he
would adore his new daughter. The thought was beautiful.

Stacie grabbed at my
hand and pulled me front and center now.

“Jack, guess what
else?” Stacie asked him.

Oh gosh. Really,
Stacie...now?

“Tori has a
boyfriend
!”
Stacie squealed like a teenager.

Okay. Wow...Thanks,
Stace.

“I know,” Jack said, a
huge smirk developing on his face.

“What? What do you
know?
”
I asked sarcastically.

“Kai wrote to me. He
wanted to make sure I was cool with him hitting
on my little sister. I
assured him I was, but that he would still get my
special
talks
even from Australia,” Jack said, laughing.

I was dumbfounded.

Kai asked Jack before
he’d asked me?

“He’s a good man, Tori.
You couldn’t do better if I hand-picked him myself,” Jack said.

“When...when did he
write you?” I asked.

“Maybe a week ago or
so, before your date to the lake,” he said.

I couldn’t help but
feel a tad miffed by this information. “Wow. He’s pretty
confident
in
himself. We only just talked about dating last night.”

“Tori, don’t get all
bent out of shape, he didn’t want to start something he couldn’t finish. He was
just making his intentions clear, at least to me, and wanted to make sure he
knew how to read you.”

A sick, creeping
feeling came over me. My throat felt instantly tight as I strained to speak.  

“What do you mean?”

“I explained to him
that you’d had a very difficult year and that you were just getting back on
your feet in Dallas. I told him to give you some space if you needed it.”

I felt like I had just
been punched in the gut by his words. I would have gladly traded the feeling for
a physical blow.

 “Oh Jack,” Stacie
whispered, a worried look on her face.

“
What?
What am I
missing here?” Jack asked.

“Nothing, absolutely
nothing. I need to go to work,” I said, walking out the door.

I heard Stacie call out
to me, but I waved her off.

If Kai already knew
about the accident, then why did I have to re-count it to him like he was
hearing it for the first time? Was that why he was so quick to move on with our
evening—kissing me like a man who hadn’t been bothered by my confession in the
slightest?

By the time I arrived
at work, my confusion level was at an all-time high. A part of me wished I had
asked Jack more specifics about his conversation with Kai, but it was too late
for that now. Though I knew Jack was only trying to protect me the way he
always had, this was
my
business. It should have been mine to share—when,
how, or with whom I wanted.

I wanted to call
Kai—confront him outright with what he had known prior to last night, but I was
out of time. I was running late as it was. Mentally I worked to find a scenario
that would make it alright—make it okay—that he knew before I told him. I came
up with nothing.