All for Maddie (12 page)

“Dana Ray, the fire’s ready,”
Dana called from the grill.

We sat at the picnic table
and ate steak, baked potatoes, and corn on the cob on our little beach. I was
going to miss this place. Maddie and I had so many memories there.  She loved
our little beach as much as I did.

Dana and I cleaned up the
mess while my dad, Alex, and Maddie tossed a Frisbee back and forth.

“Catch,” Maddie said,
throwing it to me. It didn’t glide through the air at all. It rolled and
clunked to the sand after hitting the picnic table.

“Come here,” I coaxed,
walking to the front of my dad. I knelt behind her and helped her hold it. It
glided to my dad and he caught it. She squealed delighted that she had done it.

“I frow it to Nana, Papaw,”
she explained.

Dana walked in front of them
and my dad knelt to help her. I was staring down at her with my dad, feeling a
little sad at how much I knew they were going to miss each other. My sadness
was quickly replaced with rage. Alex slid his arm around my stomach and pulled
me to him, kissing my neck from behind.

That wasn’t the end of it.
Alex continued to play the loving boyfriend. He was constantly, holding my
hand. I pulled it away, pulling me toward his chest. I elbowed him. The last
straw was when he pulled me to him and kissed me, right on the lips. I
tightened my lips, not kissing him back. I wasn’t puckering shit for him. I did
however, wrap my arms around his neck, and whispered in his ear.

“If you fucking touch me one
more time, I’m going to slice your fucking throat. Stop it!” I demanded. He
laughed, causing my dad to look at us with a satisfied smile.

Maddie insisted her daddy
bathe her once we were back home. He was her shiny new toy and I was the old broken
one in the bottom of the toy box. She even put her head back and let him rinse
her hair. I hated him. Oh my God, I hated that man.

I showered next and put on
jeans and a t-shirt. I was going to find Naomi and something to drink. I would
swear off alcohol another time.

Maddie was curled up in his
arms, engrossed in cartoons when I emerged.

“Where’re you going?” Alex
asked.

“To talk to Naomi,” I said,
sliding in my flip flops.

“I see Nomi too,” Maddie decided,
jumping down.

“No, you stay here with
daddy. Mommy will be back in a few minutes.”

I kicked my flip flops off
and plopped to the chair when she sat on the floor and screamed. “Okay, Maddie.
I’m not going. I’ll stay here with you,” I said in a tone that she totally
missed.

“Okay,” she instantly stopped
crying, crawled back on Alex’s lap and was lost in her movie.

“You really should stop doing
that,” Alex said.

“I probably don’t care, but
what? What should I stop doing, Alex?”

“Giving her, her way all the
time.”

I didn’t reply. I got up and
walked to the refrigerator. Like he knew how to raise kids. Damn. One beer. I
took it and walked out to the porch, quietly opening the door so that Maddie
didn’t notice.

Bring me beer. I’ll pay
you when you get back here
,
I texted Jaron.

Where’s your boyfriend?

He’s here.

“And he’s not my boyfriend,”
I quietly said to myself.

What the hell, Whit? I
thought we were friends. One minute we’re having wild sex and the next you’re
moving away with some guy? Why didn’t you tell me?

Have we ever had that kind
of relationship? We have sex. You know that.

Are we ever doing that
again?

Always thinking with your
dick. Bring me beer.

Fine. 6?

No, 12.

Oh yeah, I forgot you had
company.

My company wasn’t touching my
beer. He wanted to be super dad, he could get up and tend to her while mommy
laid in bed hung over.

Jaron pulled up ten minutes
later on the golf cart. He got off and handed me the 12-pack. I opened one
right away.

“You can stay and drink a beer
if you want,” I offered, nodding to the 12-pack.

He looked up to the opening
door. You have got to be kidding me.

“Nah, that’s okay. I’ll see
ya around,” he said, nodding his head at Alex.

Alex sat on the top step
beside me. “She’s asleep,” he said.

I snorted. “Yeah, she tends
to do that before nine o’clock every night.”

“Do you drink beer every
day?”

“Nope, mostly since you just
fell into my life.”

“You can’t hate me that
much,” he assumed.

I chugged my beer, making the
guzzling sound, clearly audible. “Oh yes, but I can,” I promised. “Did you tell
my dad you were going to pay off my house?”

“Yes.”

“You’re not.”

“Too late. I had the money
transferred before I talked to him about it. I paid it off last Monday.”

“What the fuck, Alex? You’re
really starting to piss me off. I don’t need you to pay off my house. I am
perfectly capable of that myself.”

“No, you’re not. I want you
home, raising our daughter, taking her to preschool, ballerina classes,
gymnastics, and whatever else she wants to do. I have to work. I’m not going to
be able to do it all.”

“I’m working,” I assured him.
No way was he holding that shit over my head. He had all the control he was
getting.

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes. I. Am.”

“No. You. Are. Not.”

“You can’t tell me what to
do. I’m not your property. Who the hell do you think you are? You come here,
threatening to take my daughter, you take her for a couple of days and realize,
oh, she does need her mommy, decide I’ll just force her to move in with me, pay
off my house, and now you think you’re going to tell me that I can’t support my
daughter and me? You’re crazy. You need to be committed.”

“You’re not working. I am
perfectly capable of taking care of my family.”

“I’m not your fucking family.
You fucking raped me.” I was going to kill this guy. I couldn’t live with him.
I couldn’t. I would end up in prison and Maddie would be raised by my dad.
Hmmm. That might be the best alternative I had thought of yet.

“When we are in public,
around my family or yours, we will be a family. You can stay on the other side
of the house when we are home, but around other people, we are a family.”

It was hopeless. My life was
over. I was at the mercy of a lunatic. “You’re not allowed to kiss me. What the
hell was up with that?”

“You can suck it up around
people. It wouldn’t hurt for you to be a little warmer towards me around Maddie
either. You don’t want her thinking her mommy hates her daddy.”

“Yes, I do.”

Alex snickered, placed his
hand on my knee, and stood up. “I’ll leave you to your party.”

I did have a party. I sat
there and drank seven of the twelve beers. I wasn’t as drunk as the night
before, but I was feeling it. I sat in Mother Nature, cherishing the sounds of
the dark night, contemplating my future. It was after midnight before I finally
gave up, not having a plan, not one stinking plan.

Alex was asleep on my sofa.
He was wearing a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. His right hand was
over his head with the other one resting on his chest. Maddie slept like that. I
stared at him sleeping peacefully wondering how he could be such an ass. It was
a shame he had the personality that he did. Of course I was the only one that
thought his personality lacked decency. He had everyone else eating out of the
palm of his hand. He was so handsome. Oh my God, I groaned, causing him to
stir. I quietly walked away. He was too ugly to be handsome.

I walked in to Maddie’s room.
She was also sleeping with one hand over her head and one on her chest. I
kissed her sleeping lips and covered her up, not that she would be there much
longer. She would be in my bed within the hour. Guaranteed.

I woke to an empty bed. I
should have known better than to drink beer with Maddie there. I never heard
her climb in and out of bed. I wasn’t instantly panicked that she was cooking
something, like I normally was. I knew her so called daddy was there. Jesus my
head hurt again. I was never drinking again. That was it. I was done with that.
Why the hell was I awake at eight in the morning anyway? I was supposed to be
staying in bed hung over all day. Oh yeah, I had to pee. Stupid beer.

I slipped on a pair of shorts
and walked out, blinking my eyes to make sure, I was seeing what I was seeing.
Both Alex and Maddie were asleep on my couch. I hated that son of a bitch, but
I’d never seen anything so cute in all my life. They were freaking adorable.
Maddie was asleep on his chest with her little arm flung across him. He had his
hand on her butt, holding her close to him. She went to him. She didn’t come to
me. I didn’t like it. It hurt my heart a little.

I started coffee after relieving
myself of the unwanted beer, waking Alex. He sat up moving Maddie over.

“Morning,” he whispered.

“Hey,” I casually said, not
looking at him.

He walked to the bathroom and
didn’t come out. I knew what was taking so long when I heard the shower.

Maddie sat up just as he shut
it off. “I have a potty,” she said.

Shit. Now what?

“Can you hold it for five
minutes?”

“I have a potty. It gonna
fall out.”

“Come on.” I took her hand
and tapped on the door.

Alex opened it with shaving
cream on his face and a towel wrapped around his waist.

I felt the strangest urge to
jump up and down, pee a rainbow, bark like a dog. Jesus God, he was yummy.

“I have a pee,” Maddie
explained, helping me out. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t move my eyes from his
delectable body.

“You going to help her or
just lust after me?” Alex smirked.

“In your dreams,” I counted,
removing the pull up and tossing it in the trash.

I walked out to get Maddie a
pair of panties and when I returned she was standing butt naked on the sink,
smeared in shaving cream.

“Here, pick your foot up,” I
said, trying to discreetly look at Alex through the mirror.

“I shave too,” Maddie said,
patting shaving cream on her cheeks and raising her foot as I pulled on a pair
of panties for her. I wanted her to argue, just a bit, so that I didn’t have to
move. I couldn’t help it. It was his fault. He was the one that kept me from
leaving the night before. I wouldn’t have been so keen on looking at him had I
gotten laid.

“You got her,” I asked,
turning away and then right back as I made it to the door. His ass really
shouldn’t look like that.

“Yes, we’ll be out as soon as
we shave.”

I left, closing the door and
shaking my head, telling myself to get a grip. I could not lust after Alex
Wesson.

Alex left as soon as he was
dressed, saying that he had work to do. He hugged Maddie and even told her that
he loved her.

“Daddy will see you in few
days with a big truck, okay?”

“And Maddie gonna sweep at
you house?”

“Yes, baby, you’re going to
sleep in my house.”

“And Mommy too?”

“Yes, Mommy too. Daddy’s got
to go. I’ll call you later,” he said, giving her one more kiss.

“Did you want a kiss?” he
teased.

“You’re a smart man. I’m sure
you can find the answer to that somewhere in that screwed up mind of yours.”

He snickered and kissed
Maddie on the cheek before leaving.

Maddie and I spent some time
at our little beach, rode her bike on the basketball court, ate supper in the
dining room with my dad and Dana, and were home and bathed by seven o’clock.  

I walked out of the bathroom
to Maddie talking on my phone. Now who did she call? The last time she had my
phone she was talking to someone in Los Angeles, California.

“Give me that,” I demanded.

“Hello?” I said, to the
laughing idiot. I could tell right away that it was Alex.

“What are you laughing at?”

“I know
—
”
He couldn’t even spit it out, he was laughing so hard. He repeated himself
several times unable to speak. I was getting mad. He seemed to have that effect
on me.

“WHAT ALEX?”

“I know what you’re doing?”
he laughed.

“You know what I’m doing?” I
asked, not having a clue what the hell he was talking about. I wasn’t doing
anything.

“Yes, Maddie just informed me
that you were pooping.”

“Oh my God, Madelyn Rae,” I
yelled at my smiling daughter. “Here talk to her,” I demanded, handing her the
phone, glad that he couldn’t see the crimson red that I was sure had just taken
over my cheeks. I was mortified.

I’m sure that was the longest
week of my life. The anticipation was killing me. I just wanted to go and get
it over with. I couldn’t stay focused on anything anyway. I was horrible at
training the new girl that would take my place checking guests in and out. I
couldn’t remember anything and I’d been doing that job since I was ten.

Maddie spent a lot of time
with my dad and Dana while I cried, packing up our things. I wasn’t packing
everything. We’d be back. I would figure out a way. I didn’t even take all of
my clothes. I wouldn’t need those either. I wasn’t allowed to work. What the
hell did I need clothes for? I did take all of Maddie’s. There was no sense in
leaving hers behind. She out grew them faster than I could buy them anyway.

I let Maddie help pack two
boxes of her favorite toys, of course all of them were her favorite.

“Maddie you can’t take them
all. You won’t have anything to play with when we come home.”

“I can bring dem back. In dis
box,” she assured me, picking up an empty box. I let her fill the box with toys
that I would leave behind, unbeknownst to her. “Dat my daddy!” Maddie
exclaimed, running to the new ring tone which I was sure I wasn’t going to be
allowed to keep. I’m not even sure who sang the stupid song. The chorus said
something like, ‘you were a waste, even when you were nothing but sperm, now
you’re a waste on a pedestal thinking you’re firm.’

I sat on Maddie’s bed,
listening to her talk to her daddy with mostly 
uh-huh’s
. “My daddy want
a talk a you now,” Maddie said, handing me my phone.

“What?” I answered.

“Still being a bitch, eh?”

“No Alex, I’m freaking
ecstatic. I can’t wait to be whisked away to live with you. What do you want?”

“I just wanted to let you
know that the truck would be there around eight in the morning.”

“I told you that I don’t need
a truck. I’m not bringing that much; my truck will do fine.”

“The truck will be there by
eight. You are not parking that thing in my driveway. You and Maddie can ride
home with me.”

“I can’t wait.”
Click
.

I’m sure I didn’t sleep at
all. I was still staring at the ceiling, wide awake when Maddie crawled in bed
with me at three in the morning. I was still awake well after that, thinking
about my plan. The plan that I didn’t have. I needed one of those little tape
recorder things. Maybe I could get him to say something that I could use
against him. Maybe I could record him admitting to the rape and forcing me to
live with him through extortion.

I woke to the sound of
beeping. What the hell was that? Oh, the truck. I looked to the empty side of
my bed. Shit! Where was Maddie?

I quickly pulled on shorts
and ran out to the kitchen.

“Madelyn Rae Bradshaw!” I
yelled just as Mr. Dick Head himself opened my door. She was sitting on the
floor with one hell of a mess.

“I did cook,” she said,
looking up with wide eyes.

The sugar bowl sat beside
her. She had at least two cups in the bowl with the little bit of Fruity
Pebbles, and I have no idea what else was in there. I’m pretty sure one
consisted of barbeque sauce.

“Why do you do this?” I
asked. “Why can’t you just wake me up?”

“Me was hungry,” she implied
like I was stupid.

I looked to see the
expression on Alex’s face, sure that it was going to be a smirk. Shit, it
wasn’t. He was looking at my braless t-shirt.

“Here,” I said, breaking him
from his useless trance. He was never touching this chest. I lifted Maddie,
letting sugar run down her body and handed her off to him. He held her out and
carried her to the bathroom.

My dad and Dana showed up as
I swept the last little bit into the dustpan. I dumped the bowl of whatever the
hell she was trying to create down the garbage disposal, grabbing the bouncy
ball just in time.

“Papaw,” Maddie screamed
running to him with clean clothes and wet hair. What the hell? Her hair was
washed and I hadn’t heard her scream that her eyes were burning at all. She
didn’t whine about it at all. “I feed a fish, Papaw,” she said, holding his
face in her hands.

“Okay, we’ll go feed the fish
in a minute.”

I jumped in the shower next.
This was it. All of my things were loaded and the truck was pulling out. Alex
pulled me close to his side and kissed the side of my wet hair, putting on a
show for my dad. I wanted to punch him.

We ate breakfast with my dad
and Dana in the dining room and said a quick goodbye, by Alex’s sweet as hell
Lexus or something. I don’t know what it was, but it was sharp. I loved it. Of
course I wouldn’t disclose my love affair with his car to him. I hated that
car. My dad hugged Maddie and then me. He shook Alex’s hand, told him to take
care of his girls, and got the hell out of there. I could tell he was pretty
choked up. I hated Alex Wesson.

We rode in silence for at
least half an hour. Well, I was silent. He and Maddie were jabbering away. I
stared out the window, not paying attention to the toddler conversation going
on behind my seat.

“Does your family still live
in the house that Maddie was conceived in?” I asked, turning to him. I was nice
about it. I put it as mildly as I could, only because I didn’t want to say rape
where Maddie could hear.

“No, they live in Lincoln
too, about twenty minutes from our house.”

“It’s not our house,” I
assured him. My house was forty miles back.

“It is our house, and you
will meet my parents Sunday. We’re going there for dinner.”

“Great, I can’t wait.” So
this was my life. I just agreed and did everything that Alex Wesson told me that
I was doing. “Do you have brothers or sisters?”

“I have a sister, Regan. She
can’t wait to meet you.”

I couldn’t reply. I was sick.
I didn’t want to meet Regan or Mr. and Mrs. Wesson. “What do they know about
Maddie?” I asked curious.

“Everything, they already met
her when she stayed with me. They love her to death.”

“You didn’t tell me that.”

“You don’t really talk to
me.”

“That’s because…never mind.
It doesn’t even matter,” I decided, turning my attention back to the wild
flowers along the highway. I was tired of repeating myself. It didn’t matter
that I was being forced to leave my home and live with him. He didn’t care what
I thought about any of it.

“You’re not even two hours
from your family, Whitley. You can see your family.”

Again, I didn’t reply with
words, just the nasty glare that I was sure he had to be getting used to.

I ran Maddie into the house
and to the bathroom as soon as Alex unlocked the door. That was close; she
barely made it. The truck had already been there and gone, leaving our things
in the garage.

“I thought you could take
this room,” Alex said, opening the door to where Maddie slept the last time.

“What about Maddie?”

He walked around me and down
the hall from my new room. “I had this room cleaned out. I think it was a
library at one time, but I’m not really a reader. I thought the shelves would
come in handy with all of her toys and books.”

I walked into the most
amazing room I’d ever seen in my life. I wanted that room. I liked to read. I
could just fill it up with books and live there. I wouldn’t have to worry about
seeing him. The shelves were a shiny black, from floor to ceiling. They tied in
with a white marble floor with black and gray swirls,

I was astounded.

“I’m having that desk
removed. I thought her bed could slide in its place. We’ll go pick out
furniture for her tomorrow.”

“It’s pretty far away from my
room. I’m not sure I like her being all the way down here by herself.”

“We’ll get some baby monitors
so you can hear her.”

“This floor is probably going
to be cold this winter, don’t you think?”

Alex smiled as Maddie ran
around the room, sliding her socks and pretending to skate. “I have heated
floors. She could sleep on this floor and stay warm.”

“Heated floors? How does that
work?” I was curious about that.

“There are waterlines just
below the floor. The furnace heats the water and it circulates through the
lines.”

I raised my eyebrows.
Interesting.

<><><> 

We fought about the five
thousand dollar bedroom ensemble for Maddie. It was ludicrous. She didn’t need
that. It was such a waste of money but Alex didn’t care. That was the one that
she liked. We fought about the Lexus that I loved. No, that I hated. It was for
me. I didn’t need a car like that. I was afraid of it. I couldn’t even imagine
how much he spent on that. We fought about the credit card that had my name on
it. I wasn’t using his money. I had money. Well, I had $649.00 left in my
checking. How long would that last?

I didn’t even get the house
to myself. That was the only thing that I was looking forward to. Alex worked
from his home office almost every day. He did leave a couple of times to go to
his office and do whatever it was he did. I still didn’t know what Wesson
Simulations was. I didn’t care enough to do any research to find out. He would
work a couple hours, come out and play with Maddie, work for a little while,
and then do the same thing.

By Friday I was already going
nuts. There was nothing to do in that amazingly huge house. I found a vacuum in
a utility closet bigger than my kitchen back home. At least it was something to
do.

I turned looking toward the
plug from the beautiful rug when it suddenly stopped.

“What are you doing?” Alex
asked, holding the plug in one hand and Maddie in his arm.

“What does it look like I am
doing?”

“You don’t have to do that.
The cleaning staff will be here in the morning.”

“The cleaning staff?”

“Yes, I have three girls come
in and clean from top to bottom every Saturday. I thought we would spend the
day at the zoo.”

“Alex, what the hell do you
expect me to do around here? I am going crazy. I can’t just sit around here
every day. I’ve been working since I was old enough to walk. I’m not handling
this well.”

“What da hell I posed to do?”
Maddie asked. I had to quit doing that.

Alex laughed and sat her
down. He sat down on the chair and told me to sit.

“What do you want to do,
Whit? Remember that day you broke my jaw on the sidewalk?”

“I didn’t break your jaw.”

“It sure as hel...heck felt
like you did. You were yelling at me, because you never got to go to college.
What would you have gone to college for?”

“I don’t know. Why does it
even matter?”

“What, Whit? What would you
have done with your life had Maddie not come along?”

“You’ll think it’s stupid,” I
said.

“I won’t. I promise.”

“I wanted to film movies. Be
behind a camera.”

He looked at me peculiar.

“Stupid, uh?”

“I don’t think it’s stupid.
Why did you want to do that?”

“I don’t know. I think
Jurassic
Park
did it. I was amazed at the scenes of that film. I didn’t care so much
about the filming of the actors, just the actual putting it together.”

Why the hell was he staring
at me with that stupid smile?

 Why don’t you take some
online classes? Maddie will be in school in two more years, and then if you
still want to get out of the house, maybe you can work a couple days a week or
something.”

“I’m sure filming of anything
would require some traveling. I can’t do that. I have a child.”

“You have a child with a
daddy who is perfectly capable of taking care of her. Come on, I want to show
you something,” he coaxed, leading me to his office. I hadn’t been in there
yet. I didn’t want to be in there. I didn’t care what he did.

“I come too,” Maddie said
running in front of us.

It wasn’t an office at all. I
was a little taken aback. There was a slim countertop with a massive amount of
computer equipment, buttons, and microphones. The whole wall facing the table
was some sort of screen.

“What is this, Alex?” I
asked.

“It’s what I do: Wesson
Simulations. What did you think I did?”

“I don’t know, I assumed it
had something to do with the theaters that your parents own.”

“It sort of does, my work is
shown in those theaters. I work for myself and many clients, including Disney,
Universal, HBO, Nickelodeon, and several other small studios. I design 3D
simulations.”

“For movies?” I asked. Wow, I
would have never guessed. I thought he was in there crunching numbers, and
building spreadsheets. I was intrigued to say the least.

Maddie climbed up on one of
the chairs and started pushing buttons.

“No, Maddie. You can’t play
with that,” I said, starting to grab her.

“She’s okay,” he smiled.

She pushed a button and said,
“Hello.”

“I love it. We see who she’s
going to take after,” he proudly boasted.

She pushed the button on the
thick microphone.

“Welcome to Donald’s, I take
your order?”

I laughed. It was epic. The
boasted smile on Alex’s face was replaced with a frown.

“Oh, you think that’s funny?”
he smirked.

I tightened my lips, trying
to hide it. It was funny. It was great, the best thing she could have said at
the best time.

He picked her up and sat down,
placing her on his lap. “You can sit down,” he offered, nodding to the chair
beside him. I shook my head. I didn’t need to sit.

He turned some buttons,
flipped switches, and messed with levers scattered about the table in front of
him. Maddie and I both gasped as the screen came to life.

It was definitely 3D. He was
working on a cartoon simulation where the butterflies looked like they were
flying right at us. The water in the stream lapped right into the room. Maddie
and I both jumped when the deer darted out of nowhere and ran across the
stream.