All I Want for Christmas Is You (Short Story) (3 page)

She didn’t say anything, because it seemed so old-fashioned and strange. But Billy knew her inside and out and he dropped his arms. “You’re kidding.”

“I’m not.”

“You want me to ask for his daughter’s hand in marriage? Really? Your dad?”

She nodded. He started to groan, but she stood and grabbed her own underwear from the floor.

“You know he’s not going to like it.”

“I know, and this might … pave the way. Babe. We need to try.”

“You mean I need to try.”

“Billy,” she sighed, disappointed that he went there so fast. Put out and sullen, he sounded like his sisters when he acted this way.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s important to you?” he asked.

“Very.”

“Then I’ll do it.”

She threw her arms around his neck, knocking him slightly off balance. Billy was learning how to compromise. It wasn’t always the prettiest thing, but he was trying.

“Did Janice give you a hard time when you came in?”

“Nothing more than usual.”

“I can’t wait to get out of this house. A place that’s just ours.”

“Two days,” she said, and all the nerves and worries came rushing right back.

“Hey, you know what else we need?”

“Billy, not again.”

“No, you pervert.” He reached behind himself and pulled open the top drawer of the desk, without looking away from her. He kept it hidden in his fist. “I got you a present.”

“Really?”

He pulled his hand away. “I was going to give it to you tomorrow, but I thought you might want to wear it tonight.”

Suddenly she knew what it was and for a moment, stark and strange, she didn’t want him to open his hand. She wanted this moment to fold itself up and go away.

“I don’t … I don’t know if this is the kind of thing you wanted. But I thought … I thought it was really pretty. Reminded me of you.”

He opened his fist and in his palm was a gold ring with a small diamond surrounded by pearls. It was exactly what she thought it was, the physical proof of what they were doing, and surprisingly, at the sight of it the fear vanished as fast as it had come, and she gasped with pleasure. With surprise. That had to be a good sign, right? She was delighted by the ring.

“I love you,” he said, slipping it onto her finger.

“It’s beautiful, Billy,” she said. It fit like it was made for her. And it caught the lamplight and sparkled so beautifully.

“Not bad,” he said and kissed her. Kissed the ring. He picked her coat up off the desk and helped her put it on then led her out of his room, into the chill of the house.

When he wasn’t looking, she slipped the ring off and put it into her pocket.

Chapter 2

Maddy was still nervous. Billy he could feel it throbbing off of her. Her fingernails were practically gone. And he wasn’t exactly thrilled about this whole dinner plan with her parents, but he was doing it to make her happy and hopefully to get her to stop chewing her nails until they bled.

Night came early to Pittsburgh in the winter. And the neighborhood looked its best this time of year. Christmas lights brightened the poorest of the houses. Snow covered the worst of the sidewalks.

They kicked their way through the middle of the street, through piles of freshly fallen snow. White flakes still tumbled from the sky, covering Maddy’s pretty curls, melting on her cheeks. He liked her any season, but Christmas and her birthday were always a good stretch of time for them.

The air smelled like baking and pot roast, which made his stomach roar.

Maddy’s mom was going to make something fancy. Fancy and weird. There was a good chance it would be gross. She was like that; looking through cookbooks to find something no one in the world really wanted to eat.

Maddy
, he thought, when he started to get grossed out thinking about what kind of dinner Maddy’s mom was going to make.
Doing this for my girl.

Two of the Lester kids and another boy ran by, dragging sleds. “Hey, Billy!” they shouted, their sleds banging into their legs as they came up behind Billy and Maddy. Billy turned to face them and took Maddy’s suddenly tense hand, curling it over his arm. There was a rumor that the oldest Lester kid had graduated from bashing car windows with a bat to mugging people with a knife. “You rich now or what?”

“No guys, not rich.”

“You look rich.”

“Thanks.” He laughed and the kids laughed, too. The tension in Maddy’s arm relaxed.

“When we gonna see you on TV and shit?”

“Not sure, hopefully next season.”

“Cool.”

“See you around,” Billy said and turned to continue walking toward Maddy’s place.

“Hey, lady,” the oldest Lester kid yelled and Maddy turned to look over her shoulder at him. “Call me when you wanna see what a real man can do.” He grabbed his crotch.

“Go back home to your mom,” she yelled, and kept walking. A smile on her face.

“It will be good to get out of this neighborhood, won’t it?” Billy asked, watching her carefully. They’d been so obsessed with the draft lately that she had stopped talking about what
she
wanted to do. And he didn’t know if that was good or bad. He could take care of her; it’s not like she had to work or go to school, but she wasn’t the kind of girl who wanted to be taken care of.

“Yes. It will,” she sighed.

“I’m in Rochester again until they call me up.”

“I like Rochester,” she said. She’d worked hard to finish her credits early. She was done with high school except for graduation. Another thing she would tell her parents tonight.

“I rented that apartment I told you about. In the house.”

“You did?”

“Yeah. I mean, we need a place and there are plenty of schools and stuff for you in Rochester. You know. College.”

“I can’t really enroll there. What if you get called up?”

“You can transfer, right?”

“Yeah,” she stroked his arm. He could tell she was overwhelmed by all of it. “Good point, I guess. Let’s not worry about it right now, Billy.” She slipped her hand from his elbow to his palm, twining their fingers through their gloves. “Let’s just worry about tonight.”

They stopped in front of Maddy’s house. It was the same kind of cookie-cutter special he grew up in. Two stories, a fenced-in yard. A cement porch. But Maddy’s mom had put up window shutters. They had bars on the windows but they didn’t look bad, like some of the barred windows in the neighborhood, not with the curtains and crap she had put up to hide them.

In the spring the front walk was decorated with flowers, in the summer a vegetable garden grew in a small patch by the door, and now, in the winter, blinking white lights surrounded all the windows. A white and red star shone down from the chimney and Santa himself waved from the front door.

“Looks good,” he joked.

“She loves Christmas.”

He and Maddy stood there side by side, just watching the house. He could feel how torn she was. How sure and unsure she felt at the very same time.

How do I fix it? he wondered. How do I make her believe in us when we seem so crazy?

Well, first he was going to ask her dad for permission to marry her. Ridiculous. But if it made her feel better, he would do it.

“Let’s go,” he said, tugging her into action.

“Billy,” she didn’t move. “If they don’t approve—”

“We’re still doing it,” he interrupted, with enough conviction for both of them. He wasn’t totally sure how she would have finished that sentence on her own. He didn’t want to hear it. “I love you. You love me. We need each other. Yeah, it’s weird that we’re so young, but that doesn’t matter.”

“You’re right.” She smiled, beamed really, the Christmas lights blinking in her eyes. It was the first true smile he’d seen from her in a few days, but somehow it still didn’t feel real. “You’re totally right.”

Maddy led him up the steps and opened the front door. In the foyer they stripped off their stuff. Coats and boots. Her gloves. His hat. Maddy put on the slippers her mom always left by the door. Billy ignored them.

The front room was empty, just as it always was. All the vacuum lines in the carpet lined up perfectly, and the Christmas knickknack crap on the shelves looked like it had just been dusted. The couches no one ever sat on appeared new, but the Baumgartens had probably owned them for twenty years.

The room was for special occasions, but Maddy said there was never anything special enough to get the front room dirty.

“Mom! Dad?”

There was a thunk and a clank from the kitchen and Maddy’s mom suddenly emerged. Maddy had gotten her mom’s dark curly hair and big eyes, her ready smile and her way with people.

But Joanne was about a foot shorter and weighed close to three hundred pounds; she wore housecoats a lot and dresses without waists. Tonight it was a red and green one; she even had a sprig of holly in her hair.

Maddy obsessed over her body because she didn’t want to look like her mom and nothing that Billy could say to her seemed to convince her that it wouldn’t happen. Maddy was strong and athletic.

It was one of those things that he chalked up to her being a girl and him being a guy—sometimes they just didn’t look at things the same way. And frankly, he’d still love her if she weighed a million pounds. He’d worry about her, but he’d love her.

“Hey, Mrs. Baumgarten,” he said, sliding past Maddy to give Joanne a hug and a kiss on the cheek. She always seemed to like that stuff. She liked him. It was comforting to think that Joanne was going to welcome him into their family with open arms. He was the son she had always wanted and all that stuff. It would in fact be awesome if he could just ask
her
for Maddy’s hand in marriage.

“Stop right there!” Joanne said and pointed up. Maddy groaned.

“Mistletoe,” Maddy said and Joanne clapped. “Mom put it everywhere this year.”

Billy glanced up and saw the green plant hanging down from a ribbon. “That’s mistletoe?” he asked, turning his head sideways.

“You’ve never seen it?” Joanne asked, astonished.

“Nope.” Maddy squeezed his elbow. It bothered her way more than it bothered him to be reminded of all the things he grew up without. In his mind, he had all that mattered. Hockey and Maddy. What was some stupid plant going to add to that … well, besides the obvious?

“You know what to do, right?” Joanne asked.

“My kind of Christmas decoration,” Billy joked and leaned over to kiss Maddy quickly on the lips. He was always so careful about being demonstrative at her house. He figured it was the respectful thing to do. But as soon as he pulled away, Maddy pulled him back down again. A hard kiss, more force than finesse.

Man, she really was nervous.

He didn’t want to think about it, and he was pretty damn good at not thinking about the things he wanted to forget.

“And now you,” he joked and pulled Joanne, laughing and swatting his hands away, under the mistletoe, where he very carefully kissed her cheek.

“Well, look at you, so fancy,” she said, touching his tie. “This is quite a celebration, isn’t it?”

Maddy had told her parents that she wanted to have Billy over to celebrate this summer’s draft, Christmas, and her birthday all rolled into one.

“It sure is,” he said. “Smells good in here. I can’t wait.”

“Well,” she said, walking back into the kitchen, where it didn’t really smell all that great. “I’m making curry! Can you believe it?”

“Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s delicious,” he said. The kitchen was about the biggest room in the little house. A few years ago Billy had helped Maddy’s dad, Dougie, knock down a wall so that they could have the kitchen and casual dining room in the same space. Then they’d put in new white cabinets and an eating area with a pink vinyl banquette against the wall. There was a big window at the end of the table, overlooking the backyard and part of the garage.

“Have a seat,” Joanne said. “Would you like something to drink?” Her eyes twinkled. Really, sometimes she looked so much like Maddy it was eerie. “Doug bought a case of Yuengling.”

“Beer?” He laughed. “Mrs. Baumgarten, are you offering me a beer?”

“Seems like a boy who’s been drafted into the NHL ought to have a proper celebration.”

“I’m good with iced tea,” he said, knowing there would be a pitcher in the fridge. Joanne got him a glass.

“Where’s Dad?” Maddy asked, following them into the kitchen.

“Waiting for dinner.” Dougie walked in, tall and wiry, his face always serious, like whatever he was thinking about sort of made his head hurt. He wore workpants. He always wore workpants.

“Dougie.” Joanne chastised her husband and lifted the lid on a pot on the stove. Fragrant steam filled the air.

“I thought dinner was at five,” Doug said.

“Sorry we’re late, Daddy,” Maddy said.

“Doug.” Billy stepped up and shook the man’s hand. Billy had been calling him Doug since he was a kid skating at the rink where Mr. Baumgarten worked.

“Billy.” Doug’s handshake was quick. Firm. No-nonsense.

“So? Can we eat?” Doug asked.

Joanne tasted the liquid on the wooden spoon, did a little shimmy in excitement, and announced that dinner was ready. Doug opened the fridge and grabbed two cans of beer, handing one to Billy.

“You’re going to want this to wash it down,” he whispered. Billy smiled and took the beer.

“I’ll help,” Maddy said, staying in the kitchen with her mother. Doug led the way to the dining room, all done up with Joanne’s fancy red and gold dishes. She had ribbons hanging from the chandelier and the centerpiece was made of Christmas tree branches. It looked like something you’d see in a catalog.

Billy turned back and looked at Maddy before rounding the corner.

“Talk to him,” she mouthed.

Right. Talk to him.

Doug sat down at the head of the table and cracked open his beer. Billy sat in what had become his spot, across from Maddy’s chair. He did not crack his beer. He did, however, break out into a sticky sweat.

Christ
, he thought,
I’m twenty years old. Not a kid.

“We’re real proud of you, son,” Dougie said. “Joanne and I, the whole neighborhood … real proud.” He lifted his beer can out in a salute to him. And Billy nodded, feeling flushed and nervous.