All My Heart (Count On Me Book 4) (11 page)

Chapter Eleven

Kayden

No sooner do I grab the paperwork and head back to my room to fill it all out then my phone rings and my mood takes a nose dive straight into the toilet.

I’m not sure what
wasn’t clear when he called on Friday, but apparently, Tom’s not ready to give up on a sit down with Dean. His number continues to flash across my phone for at least two minutes before it finally dies and hits the machine.

When I get the message, it’s easier than it was a couple of days ago. This time he’s not asking me to go to the prison. All he wants is for me to head to his office and pick up a letter Dean wrote.

I gave a lot of thought to what Belle said over the weekend. I just can’t do it. I don’t wanna put myself through it, let alone bring the girl I’m head over heels for into a room with the guy that almost took me from her.

She saved my life tha
t night and that’s what I want her to remember, even if she was in the courtroom when he was sentenced. Being there with me then, it’s different than doing it now. She got to see that what she did that night calling 911 paid off and he was paying for it. Sitting in front of him while he’s shackled to a chair, telling me things that will probably destroy me, it’s going to hurt her and I can’t let that happen.

I also don’t want to risk her
developing sympathy for the devil.

Pulling into the garage and parking, I grab my phone off the seat and slip myself out of the car. My signal down here is shit, but in order to make this as quick as possible, I’m gonna call Tom and make sure he’s got whatever I need
to see ready. The less time I spend here the better for all of us.

“Tom, I’m downstairs. My phone’s gonna die. Get it ready. I’ll see you in five.”

I hate being here and reliving all of this.

Being around Belle, eventually falling in love with her and feeling so torn up by what happene
d was another point of contention between me and that idiot. In the end it landed me straight through a glass table with scars I’m going to have with me for the rest of my life.

A life I wouldn’t have had at all if it wasn’t for her.
The person I needed to stay away from because for whatever reason, he’d bought into the belief that she was in some way broken and wrong.

Walking off the elevator the minute it hits his floor, I push my w
ay through the doors and see Tom standing at the reception desk, papers in hand, along with an envelope and an indifferent expression on his face.

“Thank you for coming. With my partner out for the day, I cleared his office so you could have some privacy.”

“Wasn’t planning on staying. I’ll just take it and go if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t, but Kayden, I know what’s in this letter and it’s not pretty. I don’t think you should be getting behind the wheel of a car or going anywhere until you’ve had time to process it.”

Who is this guy kidding? After everything I’ve already been through with my brother, there’s nothing that could be in that letter that would come as a surprise or impair my ability to drive back to campus.

“Just let me have the letter, Tom. I’ll worry about my own safety. It’s not your concern.”

“I don’t agree.”

“
You’re representing my brother. I didn’t think we would agree on anything. The letter please?” I ask and after a sigh, he hands it over.

“Despite what you believe about your brother, I do believe he loves you. Even the devil was capable of love. You might wanna think about that before you read what’s in those pages.”

“Yeah, I’ll take that under advisement.” I flippantly respond before turning my back and stalking from the office, not slowing my pace until I’m safely out the doors and standing in front of the elevator again.

Ripp
ing the envelope down the side until it’s cracked open enough to see the paper inside, I slide my fingers in and drag it out, tossing the envelope in the mini trash can hanging off the wall. Flipping it open until I can see my name scrawled in Dean’s messy print across the top of the page, I settle against the wall and read.

Kayden

Tom told me you didn’t want to see me and I get it. I wouldn’t want to be around me either after the shit we went through. I wanted to be able to tell you all of this to your face, but since I can’t this is gonna have to do.

I had a visitor a couple weeks ago
. Someone I never expected to see again. Kayden, Mom’s back. I don’t know why she’s back or what she wants from us, but she’s back.

She mentioned wanting to see you. She knows you’re the owner of the house even though you’re in Toronto and I also found out from Tom that you’ve got Isabelle staying there now.

I know the shit I said about that girl and I also know how right you were every time you told me different. I remember how she was when we were younger and I don’t think Mom showing up at the door and scaring the shit out of her is gonna do anyone any good.

Do what you want with her. Visit, talk, whatever, but you need to make sure you warn Isabelle or have her go back to her mom’s for a while so that she doesn’t have to deal with whatever it is our mom
wants now.

I know you hate me and chances are you won’t even believe a word I’m telling you, but I’m trying to do right by you. First time for everything right?

If you need or want to talk about what she said when she was here, go through Tom. He’ll set something up. The guards here aren’t total dicks and neither is the warden, so if you let him know, I’m sure they can set something up.

B
e careful little brother. After the nightmare I put you through; the last thing you need is another one and I’m pretty sure her being back is the worst kind of one.

For what it’s worth, I’m sorry Kay.

-Dean

The reason Tom wanted me to stay in his office, it makes sense now.  There’s not a lot that can get to me, especially after everything last fall, but what’s here, it’s the one thing that can.

Daphne Walker. My mother. The one person in the world that still has the power even ten years la
ter, to bring me to my knees. I used to think Dean was the only one that could do it, but that was before I started thinking about the way my life turned out.

When she walked away from us all those years ago, she took part of me with her, or at least I thought she did. The part of me that she saw before, the one that was good. I swear when she walked out, that good boy went along for the ride and he never came back.

I still think that sometimes, even though I know I’m not the same guy I was a few years ago. I am a good guy. It was just buried under so much bullshit it was like it didn’t exist at all. She didn’t take that part of me, but she took something because the way my body is reacting, how off kilter I feel, it’s obvious that she still has some power over me. Control even. I’m always going to react to her because despite leaving, I still love her.

Shit. What’s taking the damn elevator so long? I need to get on it, ride down to the underground garage and get the hell out of here. I need to get back to my room and shut myself away for a while so I can process this.

My brother is a lot of things. A drunk. An asshole. An abuser. Evil incarnate even. But the one thing he isn’t is a liar, at least not about this. I’m pretty damn sure he hates her for leaving as much as I do.  I’m also positive that the love I still have for her, he doesn’t. He lost it when she threw me at him and took off.

He might want t
o control me, reaching out from his place behind metal bars in order to bring me down, but he wouldn’t use Daphne to do it. He’s telling the truth, which means before I can go home and process this, I need to warn the only other person in the world that I give a shit about.

Belle.

Before the elevator can reach the bottom floor, I slip my phone back out and bring up our message screen. We texted back and forth a little bit before her first class this morning, and it’s those words I see on my screen. Those that I use to calm myself even though I’m sure I won’t settle again until I warn her about what happened.

I played “Kiss Me Slowly” so much that I think I broke it. Do you think you can give me another song for us?

“Always Somewhere Close” by Lifehouse. <3

The song she gave me, I didn’t even hesitate once I saw the text. I bought it and started playing it and if I thought I was going to break the file of the other song she said reminded her of me, it was going to be ten times worse with this one.

It was perfect. Exactly what I expect from Belle.

I think I’m losing my mind.

You lost your mind a long time ago, Kay. Lol <3

Funny. :P
I don’t hear the guy singing when I play this song. I hear you.

Seeing the blush emote on my scre
en, knowing that she had actually blushed when I said it steadies my heart the way I was hoping it would. That’s another thing that’s been happening since the first time I took her home in my car. She flashed a smiley face at me and I was lost.

I love you, Kay. I’ll text you after class.

Looking to the top of the screen, noticing the time, knowing that if I want to make my classes, I’m gonna need to start driving right away, I make a different choice. A better one.

Sliding my fingers over the screen until the text is written, just enough information given to prepare her for what’s about to happen next, I hit send and make my way to the car.

After what I just read from Dean, class is the last place I want to be. If what he said is right and she knows where I live, it means that any minute she could show up and do exactly what he said. Scare Belle. Something I won’t let happen.

Turning the key in the ignition after tossing my ph
one down onto the seat, I peel out of the spot and head out.

Final Destination, Wexfield, but more importantly,
her
.

Belle

I’m heading back to Wexfield. If I make good time I should be there in time for lunch. Can I meet you?

That’s the text I’m met with the minute we’re released from class and despite the questions going through my head about why he’s coming here when he’s got classes there, I’m never gonna to turn down a chance to see him.

Yes. I’m going into English Lit now, but need to head to the science department after, so meet me there.  Is everything okay?

Walking across campus with Isaac, his focus straight ahead of him, almost like he’s counting every step he takes, I tap on my screen and wait for Kayden to respond. If he’s on his way here now, it means he’s driving so as much as I want to have an imm
ediate response, I might need to turn my phone off and worry about it later.

Ya. Everything’s fine. Need to see
u. Miss u madly. <3

I’m not sure I believe his answer, but considering the smile he put on my face with his words, I can’t focus on it. I’ll get to the bottom of whatever’s going on when he gets here.

Remembering the promise of lunch with Isaac and not wanting to bail considering how excited he was that I asked, I send Kayden another text. It might not be the way he imagined spending time with me, but once he meets Isaac and gets to see for himself the way he is, I’m sure he’ll be okay with it.

I invited Isaac to have lunch with me this morning. I don’t want to let him down. I hope it’s okay that he spends some time with us. He was so happy when I asked. I miss you too. See you soon. <3

It’s okay, Belle. Can’t wait to meet him. Tell him I said hey. I love you. Now stop texting me. :P

Never :P

Putting my phone away, but close enough that it’s there if I need it, I jog ahead to catch up with Isaac. It’s only when he turns and sees me running that his face brightens again and I realize I should probably warn him about Kayden.

“So, there’s been a change of plans.”

His face drops and I immediately shake my head. I know what he’s thinking and that’s not allowed. I’m not bailing on him. I won’t ever bail on him. He’s as stuck with me as Eric is.

“It’s nothing bad, promise. Kayden is coming down to visit and he wants to join us for lunch. Is that okay?”

He nods and his lips lift into his familiar smile as I grab his hand. It’s something I’ve been doing for a while now. It started with Eric when he first moved here and was even more skittish than I was and now with Isaac, it’s even more important. It’s comforting, not only for the people I did it with, but for me too and with everything we’ve got to deal with, comfort is definitely needed.

Looking at our hands and then back up at me, he smiles even brighter before opening his mouth and I freeze. He’s never done anything like this before but I remember what it felt like the first time I spoke for someone other than my mom and Tristan.  If he’s about to do that now, it’s huge.

He doesn’t speak though. Instead he just mouths the words and lowers his head again.

Thank you.