ALL THAT HE WANTS (Volume 1 The Billionaire's Seduction) (33 page)

There.

I
had
said it out loud.

“Oh,” Anh murmured, and nodded slowly. “Yeah, that would kind of be… demeaning and gross.”

“Yeah.”

She scrunched up her face like a three-year-old trying to understand a math problem. “Um…
how
long have you known him?”

I buried my face in my hands. “I know, I know, it’s stupid…”

“No, I didn’t say that… I just don’t understand. Any of it.”

So I told her the story, from start to finish.

“…wow,” she whispered.

“Yeah.”

She sat there in silence for a few seconds, then smiled sadly. “Well… you did the right thing.”

“Did I?”

“Of course you did.”

“How do you know?”

“Could you have taken that deal and respected yourself?”

I smiled faintly. Just like Anh to cut right to the heart of it.

“No.”

She shrugged sympathetically. “So there’s nothing you could have done but what you did. And it was the right thing.”

I wiped away a tear from my cheek. “You know what really sucks?”

“What?”

“I wonder if I really did. The right thing.”

Her voice was soft and full of pain. “Lily…”

“He didn’t mean it like that. I know he didn’t.”

“Maybe not, but he was still being an asshole.”

“Anh!”

I wasn’t used to my roommate using any profanity, no matter how mild.

“Well, he was. Who treats people like that?”

I was about to say something, but I didn’t really want to defend the guy who’d just ripped out my heart, so I kept quiet and cried a few silent tears instead.

Anh watched me carefully. “Maybe he was just a dumbass… not an asshole.”

I laughed a little. “Yeah.” Then I grew serious. “But if he was just being a dumbass… shouldn’t I overlook that?”

“Lily, he just wants you for the sex.” She saw my face twitch like she’d accidentally cut me. “I mean, not
just
for the sex… I’m sure he cares about you, otherwise he wouldn’t have gotten upset… but he only wants things short-term, and he wants them on
his
terms, and you don’t get a say in it. Whenever he was ready to dump you, it would’ve been, ‘Sayonora,’ and he would’ve never looked back.”

“But isn’t that the way it usually is? Somebody always dumps the other person.”

“Yeah, but the dumper doesn’t pay the dump-ee. Especially not upfront, with the understanding that they’re
going
to get dumped.”

I grinned ruefully. “Maybe they should. I would’ve at least gotten
something
out of a couple of my relationships that way.”

“Yeah,” she sighed, and hugged me. “Are you going to be okay?”

No.

Maybe.

Someday.

“Yes,” I nodded, and gave her a sad smile. “Thank you.”

She hugged me tight. “I’m so sorry this happened.”

“Yeah, me too. It sucks.”

“I know. Is there anything I can do for you?”

“No… I just need some time…”

“I understand.”

“Um, I do kind of need a ride tomorrow to work, though. And early. Before anybody else gets in.”

She stared. “Are you really going? After everything you told me?”

“I have to. I’ll definitely get fired if I don’t.”

She shook her head. “Look, Connor might have been a dumbass, but he was smart about
that
. And that’s the one thing that makes me think he really does care about you. Do what he said and just lie. I’ll go in early and get your purse for you. We can come up with a story about how you got really sick and – ”

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “No, I knew what I was doing when I got in his car Friday night. I’m not going to lie to get out of it. And they could check the cameras, and see I left with him… and I’m not going to let you get in trouble for me.”

“I would, you know. Get in trouble for you.”

I smiled. “I know. And I love you for it. But just like you said about ‘could I take that deal and still respect myself ’ – if I don’t go in tomorrow, I can’t respect myself, either. I made my bed, I need to go lie in it.”

She breathed out hard and hugged me again. “Okay, well, the takeout and wine is on me tomorrow night, okay?”

“Thanks,” I said, and managed a teary laugh. “And don’t forget the Haagen Dazs… I think we’re going to need that, too.”

I broke down crying again.

She held me for a long, long time.

Anh gave me a ride the next morning, and the whole time I felt like a prisoner on Death Row, headed for the execution chamber.

Add to that I hadn’t slept but maybe an hour or two. Mostly I just cried all night, in fits and starts, until I finally dropped off to sleep from sheer exhaustion.

And the alarm blared five minutes later, it seemed.

I’d forced myself through my normal routine – shower, getting dressed, light makeup – but I felt like a zombie the entire time. The only thing that kept me going was the routine itself.

It was better than lying there in bed, thinking of Connor. And my possible firing gave me something to worry about besides him.

About what I’d lost last night.

On the way to the office in Anh’s car, I sat there trying to come up with excuses I could give Klaus, but I couldn’t think of any. My mind, already numb and overloaded, was of no use to me. The only thing it could do was force my feet forward, one after the other… make my hands open and close car doors… tell my fingers to press elevator buttons…

…and then we were on the 23rd floor.

“Good luck,” Anh whispered. “If you need to leave… early… let me know.”

I nodded and forced a smile to my lips. Then I went off to meet my doom.

I rode up to the top floor of the building. The receptionist wasn’t in yet, thank God.

My heart was pounding in my ears as I used Klaus’s badge to buzz myself in, then I raced for the boardroom.

The entire floor was deserted.

There, in the mini kitchen next to the coffeemaker, was my purse – untouched, undisturbed.

I was so frightened I would be caught that I ignored the cell phone for the time being and turned to go –

…and then I paused and looked back at the boardroom.

At the giant glass window where we’d watched the diamond and ruby lights of the traffic.

At the spot where I’d been standing when he first kissed me.

My heart broke again, and I rushed out of the room and back to the elevator, barely able to contain my tears.

When I got to my cubicle, my monitor and computer were still on, same as I’d left them on Friday night.

I put down my purse, went into Klaus’s office and threw his passcard on his desk, then dashed back out like the guilty soul I was.

I opened my purse and picked up my cell with trembling hands, my heart thudding in my chest, and turned it on to see how horrific my fate would be.

Ten texts and four phone messages.

…that’s all?

But five of the texts were from Anh, back when she thought I had gone missing Friday night and Saturday morning. She’d told me that she had called four times, so I was guessing that the four voicemails were from her, too.

That meant there were only five texts from Klaus.

And no voicemails.

WHAT?!

I scrolled through his messages.

Saturday morning, 10:57 AM – all caps:

WHERE’S THE TERAMORE REPORT?????

11:05 AM:

Never mind, I got the email. Lucky for you. But still, I should have the report in my inbox. I’m NOT HAPPY, Lily.

11:06 AM:

By the way, how did it go with that rep from LMGK last night? Call me.

12:12 PM:

When I tell you to call me, I don’t mean when it’s convenient for you. Call me ASAP.

Sunday 4:37 PM:

EXTREMELY UNHAPPY, LILY. We’ll discuss your extreme lack of professionalism when I get in on Monday morning.

And that was it.

‘I got the email’?

What the hell was he talking about?

I bent down to my computer and scrolled through the inbox, which was full of new messages.

One of them had come in Saturday morning at 8:55AM, from our contact over at Teramore. It was addressed to everyone in the exec comp department, and included me as a CC.

In light of certain unforeseen developments, the executive compensation report scheduled for Monday morning can be pushed back. We will not need it until later in the week. Will advise on Monday once everyone is in the office. Have a great weekend.

My already hurting brain struggled to comprehend what I’d just read.

They had canceled at the last minute.

I had been saved – literally – in the nick of time.

But how?

If I hadn’t been so tired and brain dead, I would have realized it immediately. But it took me a few seconds.

Connor.

Connor saved me.

I looked at the time stamp in confusion. 8:55 AM Saturday…

And then I remembered. When I woke on Saturday morning, he’d been on the phone. One of the calls he’d made must have saved my ass.

But why didn’t he tell me, then?!

I almost burst into tears. Whether it was because I was so touched or so infuriated, I wasn’t sure, but I was definitely both – and all at once.

“When I tell you to call me back, you
call me back,
Lily,” a snide voice said behind me.

Klaus.

I stood up and turned. I must have looked a little rough and glassy-eyed, because his normally disapproving frown shifted into ‘slightly alarmed’ territory.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, and because my brain locked from exhaustion and sadness and bewilderment over the Teramore email, I just went ahead and did it: I lied. “I got really sick.”

His expression went
full-on
alarmed, and he stepped back. “Well, don’t get
me
sick!”

I narrowed my eyes, and remembered why I hated him so much. “Don’t worry… it was a 24-hour bug.”

“You could’ve still called,” he said nastily.

No
How are you?
or
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that,
or even a hint of sympathy.

Just
Don’t get ME sick.

That, and more rebukes.

Asshole.

“I didn’t want you to hear the puking sounds,” I said with a cold, mirthless smile.

He got a little green around the gills. Herr Klaus was oh-so-delicate in certain ways.

“Well… you could have texted.”

“Sorry.”

He shook his head in disgust. No longer disgust at the mention of puking, but disgust with my work performance. “Well… how did it go with… what was his name?”

I wanted sooooo badly to say,
You mean the guy who handed you your ass in front of your CEO on the phone Friday night? You mean the guy who forced you to apologize to me for being a jerk? THAT guy?

But I remembered that my whole reason for coming in today was to keep my job… and that I’d turned away ‘THAT guy’ in order to be here.

“Connor Te – ”

I caught myself.

Maybe it was because I had said his fake last name more than I ever said his real last name. Maybe it was because I was still uncomfortable with the whole ‘Templeton’ thing.

Either way, I remembered that Klaus didn’t know who Connor really was.

“…Brooks,” I said. “Connor Brooks.”

“What did he want?”

“To see a whole bunch of files.”

“Which files?”

I shrugged. “Dozens.”

“Well, which ones?!” he demanded, raising his voice.

I
so
wanted to grab a letter opener and buy myself a twenty-year prison sentence.

Keep the job,
I reminded myself.
You must keep this job.

Or else last night was for nothing.

“Teramore… Bennickson… PT & Associates… Zaruder… Telomere Biogenetics…”

His eyes got wide – and enraged. “You didn’t
show
those to him, did you?!”

“Of course I did.”

“WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU – ”

“Because the CEO
said to
,” I snarled.

Klaus looked shocked. He actually took a tiny step back.

I guess he’d never heard the angry side of me come out before.

Actually, the angry side of me never
had
come out around him before. Not openly.

Maybe it was how tired and emotionally spent I was. Maybe that was short-circuiting the logical, life-preserving part of my brain.

Or maybe some of the things Connor had said to me – about valuing myself, about not putting up with an asshole – had actually sunk in.

Then Klaus recovered himself, and his face contorted into a nasty mask of indignation and self-righteousness.

“Dave Westerholtz certainly didn’t mean to show that pompous asshole
everything.
Those files are sensitive – if I had been here, I most certainly would
not
have let him see those files – ”

“Then
maybe
you should have been here,
” I hissed, “instead of getting drunk with some floozy at Sky Bar.”

I couldn’t believe it.

I could not
believe
those words came out of my mouth.

Neither could Klaus.

First there was shock, far beyond anything he’d shown so far.

And then there was fury. He started shaking a little, he was so angry.

“You little
bitch,
” he whispered, low and vicious, “don’t you EVER – ”

“KLAAAAAAUUS!” a familiar voice suddenly boomed out.

…and my stomach dropped through the floor.

Connor stood about fifty feet away, his arms open wide, like,
What UP, bro?

Klaus whipped around, a look of stark terror on his face.

He obviously remembered the voice, too… and the humiliations he’d suffered because of its owner.

Toss in the fact that he’d been speaking ill of Connor just a few seconds before, and Klaus was
not
a happy camper.