All That Matters (18 page)

He found her standing in his bedroom, staring out the window, arms crossed protectively at her waist. Her suitcase lay open on the bed, the clothes she’d taken on their honeymoon neatly arranged inside.

I’m losing her.
His heart dropped so suddenly, his nervous system short-circuited.

There was nothing he could do to stop her from leaving if she really wanted to. And giving up the Mustang in exchange for

Royce’s silence wasn’t going to do a damn bit of good. Losing the shop was imminent but no longer important. His life would be a big fat zero without Faith in it. His heart slowly broke into a million tiny pieces.

Unsure what to say, he approached her quietly, resting his hands lightly on her shoulders and hoping desperately that she wouldn’t push him away. She stiffened beneath his touch but he kept his hands where they were. His mouth was dry, like he’d sucked up all the sand along the Gulf Coast and forgotten to spit it out. When he spoke, the rawness in his throat made his voice gritty and coarse.

“Don’t go, Faith. Please.” He dared to draw her back against him and bury his face in her hair. “I’m sorry,” he breathed against her ear. “I’m so sorry.”

She turned in his arms, looked at him with eyes still sparkling with tears. He reached up to brush one that was caught at the corner of her mouth.

“You’ll be safer with me gone, Buddy. Look what a mess I’ve made of everything. If I’m not around, Royce will leave you alone. I’ll go where he can’t find me. It will be better for both of us.” She looked away. “I never meant to bring you harm.”

“Aw, Faith, don’t you think I know that? I wouldn’t have married you if I’d thought of you that way.”

Wanting her to know he spoke the truth, and because he wanted to watch her reaction when he finally told her, he tipped her face so she could look into his eyes. Then gulped a deep give-me-strength breath. “I married you because I wanted to. Because I–”

“You never would’ve done it if I hadn’t begged you.”

He’d almost admitted he loved her, but now the words stuck in his throat. “Maybe not, but I did, and that’s all that matters. Stay, Faith. Let me take care of you.” His mouth a whisper away from hers. “Please,” he murmured against her lips.

Faith’s pulse danced wildly. Wrapped in the circle of Buddy Lee’s arms was the only place she wanted to be, but she hadn’t dared to believe he might feel the same. Not after the way she’d hidden the truth about Royce’s earlier abuse.

She had no right to expect him to trust her, let alone love her. He hadn’t said he loved her, but, oh, how she longed for it. This man, her wonderful, life-long hero, had turned out to be the one she loved with all her heart, yet there was no way she could right the wrongs she’d caused, except by leaving him.

His mouth came down on hers with a whispered plea just then and all rational thought flew out the window, leaving her with only the aching need to be with Buddy Lee one last time.

She
slid
her arms around his neck and tunneled her fingers through his thick, coffee-dark hair. Raised up on her tiptoes so she could deepen the kiss. When he groaned and explored her mouth with his tongue, the heat of her own desire throbbed low between her thighs.

“Yes, Buddy Lee,” she murmured, when the kiss finally broke. “Yes.”

In an instant, she was swept up in his arms and carried to the bed as tenderly and carefully as he might have carried a china doll. But this time, the hurt she felt was the one in her heart for causing him pain. This time, she wanted to love him enough to make him love her back, if only for a little while.
 
Just long enough to make a memory to hold in her heart. She closed her eyes as he laid her on the bed and stretched out beside her.

“Faith,” he whispered, “look at me.”

She did, and his dark eyes were filled with such tenderness and passion, the ache in her heart spread to every thrumming part of her body.

He cupped her chin, placed a kiss on the tip of her nose.“I want to love you slow and sweet this time,
darlin
’.”

He feathered kisses down the smooth column of her neck while his hands slipped under her blouse and gathered her breasts, kneading them gently.

She sighed. Melted back into the bed and gave herself up to the pleasure, and the wonder, of his touch.

With almost no effort, he removed her blouse, unhooked her bra. Both garments landed in a heap on the floor. Her shorts and panties followed.

His hands never left her body, touching, caressing, enticing. His mouth followed his hands, exploring, tasting, exciting. Every nerve ending screamed for help. Every sensitized inch of her body begged for more. So did she.

Magically, his own clothes joined hers, and when he moved over her with such tenderness, she felt fragile and treasured. And loved.

“
Ahhh
,” he murmured, when their bodies touched.

“
Ohhh
,” she sighed, when he slid one leg between hers and the friction sent a current of electricity surging through her.

He dedicated his attention to the welfare of her breasts, loving each one slowly, dividing his time between them so that when his mouth was exquisitely busy with one, the other felt bereaved. Whimpering with need, she brought his hand to the lonely one.

He moved slowly, next focusing on her lower belly and its quivering softness. Never had she been so physically aware of her own body, the curves and hollows that he nuzzled and kissed.

Heated passion threatened to devour her with its flames.
 
Buddy Lee had awakened her to pleasure, but more than that, he’d awakened her to honest-to-goodness love and the sharp, sweet thrill of it took her breath away.

She arched her body, needing his closeness. The fullness of his arousal pressed against her thigh and she opened her legs.

His mouth found its way back to hers and he kissed her gently, sweetly. And not nearly enough. She deepened the kiss, her tongue stroking and teasing until he growled deep in his throat.

With one hand, she circled him, moving deliberately until she felt his response. Then she guided him to her, amazed at the way their bodies melted into one. Her heart filled with a love deeper than she’d imagined possible, for now she knew that Buddy Lee had sacrificed everything he held dear because he loved her.

She wanted to give love back to him for the same reason.
 
How blind she’d been not to see that he’d been right there all those years, waiting for her to love him. Now she intended to make up for lost time. How could she have missed what her heart had known all along?

“Whatever happens, I’ll always love you, Buddy Lee,” she whispered, desire and need thickening her voice.

Buddy Lee’s blood roared in his ears so loud he could barely hear above the pounding.
She loved him?
 
Was it possible?
But when he looked down at her face all soft and dewy, eagerness shining in her sea-green eyes, he knew. Oh, yeah, he knew.
  
Unbelievable as it was, his beautiful wife loved him. Not just as a means of keeping her child. Definitely not for his name, though that had come with the marriage. No, she had said she loved
him
, Buddy Lee Walker. He’d been carrying around a heart overloaded with love for so long, it finally burst through like a river overflowing its banks.

He wanted to shout his good fortune to the heavens, to the whole world, and especially to every Liberty, Texas busybody who ever called him
Boyd’s boy
. But he didn’t. Nope. Right now, this precious moment belonged to them, and he wasn’t about to share it with anyone.

“I’ve always loved you,
darlin
’.” His mouth was close to hers, lips almost touching, hearts beating as one. “And no matter what happens, I’ll take care of you.” He brushed her lips with the softest of kisses.

He’d promised her slow and sweet, but every time he tried to slow the pace, Faith took the initiative and left him balancing precariously on the edge of Paradise. An incredible place to be, where a man could die from sheer ecstasy. He fought to control the age-old force that drove them both closer to the precipice.

“Faith, my sweet Faith,” he urged against her mouth, “hold on to the moment,
darlin
’. Hold on to me.”

And she did. Dug her fingernails into his shoulders, kissed him hot and wet and deep. No holds barred.

Together, they flew through the heavens, then tumbled through space on the same wild, sweeping storm of passion.

Eventually, she stirred in his arms, and Buddy Lee took pleasure in watching her as she uncurled and stretched her warm, sweet body. He gave in to the urge to kiss her awake.

Her sleepy, sexy response triggered an answer from his own eager body, and he longed to satisfy them both one more time, but any further plan for a leisurely repeat performance came to a screeching halt when he remembered other unfinished business.
  
His Mustang...and Royce.

“Promise me you’ll be here when I get back,” he murmured into her mouth as he drew back from the kiss.

His body hummed with need when she rubbed her lips against his chest, nipped at his skin, then snuggled into the curve of his arm and aligned her body with his. Sweet heaven, he wanted to stay right where he was forever. Plus a couple of extra days, if it could be arranged.

“
Mmmm
,” she crooned and reached for him. “I’ll be here.”

He closed his eyes and moved over her once more, unable to resist. The world and all its woes were forgotten for a little while longer.

An hour later, he slipped quietly from the room, reluctant to disturb her sleep. But he left his heart with her. Right where it belonged.

“C
all the cops, Walker!” Scooter slam-banged through the front of Buddy Lee’s shop, jerking the door open and hollering at the top of his smoke-ravaged lungs. “B.L., get the hell out here, will you? I just saw your ‘
stang
goin
’ down the street.
 
Call Elroy!”

Buddy Lee emerged from the work area, wiping his hands on a polishing rag. “Knock it off, Scoot. I don’t need Elroy or any of his badges poking around here.” He tossed the rag into a nearby cardboard box.

“But...but, your car. Somebody was
headin
’ out of town with it. I swear!” Behind his black-rimmed glasses, Scooter’s eyes were bigger than a hoot owl’s.

Buddy Lee wondered if there was a sign on his back that said “Dump All Bad Luck
Here.
” He was sure collecting a heap.
 
He’d hoped, after surrendering his automobile tonight, right along with a portion of his soul, that Royce wouldn’t be spotted when he left the garage. Everybody and their uncle could recognize his Mustang a mile away, even after dark. Wouldn’t you know
Scooter’d
be the one person in the entire town to show up just as his beloved car wheeled out of town? Shoot and damn!

“Sit down, Scooter. Catch your breath before you pass out.”

Buddy Lee pointed to a metal folding chair propped against the wall. He took the battered swivel office chair for himself, settled in for what he knew was going to be a barrage of questions.

While Scooter was struggling to find his breath and his voice, Buddy Lee tried to figure out just how much, if anything, he should tell his friend. Next to nothing was preferable, but not probable, he feared.

Scooter made a big to-do of unfolding the rusty chair and sitting down. He took off his
gimme
cap and scratched his head.

“I
cain’t
believe you aren’t gonna call Elroy." He raised an eyebrow at Buddy Lee, his eyes full of questions. "You been
hittin
’ the brew or something?”

“No, I’m not drinking and I don’t plan on calling Elroy.”
 
He ducked his head and stared at his shoes. “The Mustang has a new owner, that’s all,” he mumbled.

“The hell you say!” Scooter shot up off the chair like he’d been jabbed in the butt with a cattle prod. “You gotta be on drugs.”

Buddy Lee shook his head. Doggone, he was gonna wind up spilling the whole story to Scooter after all, just to keep him from blabbing what he’d seen all over town.

He huffed out a deep sigh. “Sit down, Scoot, and I’ll try to explain.”

“Well, I sure as hell hope so.” Scooter prowled around until he located the plastic container of licorice whips Buddy Lee had shoved under the counter. He grabbed a handful and slouched back in the chair.

“Okay, dude, let’s have it. From the beginning.”
 
He chewed thoughtfully and gave Buddy Lee his rapt attention.

Twenty minutes and a whole lot of explaining and cussing later, Buddy Lee got up to fetch cold drinks for the two of them, leaving his friend shaking his head in wonder and total confusion.

“You got any money at all, B.L.?” Scooter’s voice was low, almost reverent. “How you gonna pay your bills?”

How, indeed? Buddy Lee wondered, and swallowed down the taste of failure creeping up the back of his throat.

“No money,” he admitted, “not enough, anyway, and no hope of getting any more.” He cleared his throat. “Guess I’ll lose the shop. I can always get a job fixing cars at a dealership in Granite City, I suppose.”