All Tomorrow's Parties (21 page)

She now had the uneasy task of bringing her memories out into the open. Maybe this needed to happen, she thought, after all John had always held onto a large piece of her.

“Today I am stronger than I was yesterday, all is well with me and the world in which I live”, she chanted. She had been reading a book by Louise Hay (You Can Heal Your Life), and although she found parts of it completely cuckoo there were sections such as the affirmations that she found helped support her no end.

I am not going down without a fight, she thought, and with that she headed downstairs.

In the kitchen sat Ella, Tony and Andy – Andy? He must have arrived when she was in the shower.

“Bloody hell, what’s going on here? Looks like the gathering of the Witches from Macbeth and let me tell you they were butt ugly”, she laughed.

Ella stood up and gave her a hug. “You alright?” she asked, with a slight inflection in her voice giving it a rise at the end, almost comically so.

“Yes Ella I’m fine. I was just a bit shocked last night, but now, well now I want to nail the little shit who’s behind all this”, she said, pouring a coffee from the percolator.

Andy and Ella had since the holiday become will-they/won’t-they’s. When they were together it was as though they were made for each other, but the fact that Andy was etching a bright legal career with Dawson Wright and Peller - one of London’s best city firms - which meant there was little time during the week for a life! Ella had said this is why it worked, because she couldn’t think of anything worse than being with someone 24/7. Ella had rung him to let him know what had happened and now here he was.

“Right where do we start then?” said Laine, her voice low and solid.

“You sure you’re ready for this?” said Andy, his eyes focusing in on hers. “We can leave it a bit if you want to, give you a bit more time to…” Laine stared back at him and there was no mistake in how she wanted this to go. Her face looked hard, and despite the lack of sleep and the crying her eyes were like molten steel just beginning the refining process, piercing and strong.

“No I want this woman caught.”

“Woman?” they all said in unison. “How do you know this is a woman?” said Ella, sounding surprised.

“Definitely a woman”, said Laine, sounding very convincing. “This has a woman’s hand all over it, don’t you think?” She looked at each friend in turn, trying to gauge their reaction, trying to seek their agreement, but none met her gaze.

Andy was the first to speak. “It possibly could be a woman, Laine, but at this stage we really have to look at everyone”.

Laine nodded. She knew it was a woman, she just knew, but for now she would keep quiet. Andy was right, it was early days. She would see how things played out but she was absolutely convinced she was right.

Andy had agreed to take the lead in the “investigation”. How strange an “investigation” sounded. Formal, detached, in no way connected to her and Tony’s life. She had not yet had a chance to speak to Tony properly. She needed a moment alone with him to try to explain the chaos she was a part of. It had come as a major revelation to her that he had seen the photos a year ago. She had never even suspected he knew anything, let alone seen photos, she felt nauseous just thinking about it: what must he have thought of her, and why didn’t he say anything? Bile was rising in her throat, she needed to move around, distract herself from the growing anxiety. Maybe she really didn’t know the man she’d been married to for nearly a year. This was her only secret, she had always been honest with Tony, why had he kept the fact he knew about the photos from her? She knew if the roles were reversed she would have had to tell him, as it would have eaten away at her. He would make a great poker player, she thought.

Over the next four hours they discussed every theory/possibility that popped into their heads. Andy had said they needed to mention everything no matter how ludicrous it may seem. He had asked if they had wanted the police involved and without hesitation both had said they felt this was something they could deal with.

“I want to know who we’re dealing with before making that decision if that’s OK”, said Tony who for the most part had been quiet and just been carried along with the discussion.

“You know whoever is behind this is not normal, right?” said Andy. They all nodded. “But what you also need to be aware of is that they are very clever at appearing normal, otherwise we would already know who it is. Don’t forget they have been plotting and scheming for the best part of a year now so the beginnings of this are way back then.”

“When we first got together then?” Laine looked at Tony. His eyes now appeared heavy and missing their usual sparkle.

“That’s right, because whoever it was knew you were going to Italy and wanted to hurt you both”.

“But I hadn’t even told Danny at that point…” Laine’s voice was low and controlled, no sense of emotion. She knew if she wavered or felt what she was saying she would crumble. She had to hold it together.

“OK so next question - who knew about you two at that point?”

The grandmother clock in the hall struck 3 o’clock.

“OK we need to have a break, we need to switch off for a while”, said Andy.

“I’ll make us something to eat, sorry, we were going to go for brunch but I think we all got carried away - you must all be famished, why don’t you go through to the living room? Tony can give me a hand with the drinks and food”, said Laine .

She busied herself opening cupboards, getting out plates and generally thinking about how she was going to broach the subject of the photos. Tony took her hand, gently, almost sheepishly.

“Why didn’t you say anything? You knew but you didn’t say anything?” Laine’s face completely showed how she was feeling, no poker face for her. She looked hurt; her eyes behind what seemed like a never ending circle of puffy redness had darkened, accentuating her sorrow.

“I thought if you had wanted me to know you would have said, Laine”. Tony let go of her hand and turned towards the sink looking out over the small garden. “Yes I had seen the photos…when they arrived I thought it was me they were trying to get at.” Tony’s voice was breathy and unsure. It was as though he were feeling his way down an overgrown path he had never trodden. He was not accustomed to having to explain his reasoning, not even to Laine. Being an editor he knew the power of the words he was about to speak. Despite being married for nearly a year he was still unsure of how to articulate his emotions. He loved Laine to the point of obsession, he wanted nothing to stop that. Each word he spoke was thought first, measured and analysed before leaving his lips. Sometimes his sentences appeared disjointed because of the processes that were taking place. He had never once spoken with Laine without knowing the effect his words may have.

After a long pause he spoke. “The photos did get at me Laine, but not in the way I think they were meant to. When I saw those photos it made me realise how deeply I loved you, I knew I had to ask you to marry me, so I asked and you said yes Laine you said yes, nothing else mattered, especially when you ended up in hospital.” The words hung in the air.

“If you want to know, Tony, I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you everything”, said Laine softly.

“Laine no, I don’t want to know, it’s in the past, it was in the past when I asked you to marry me wasn’t it?” Tony turned from the sink to face her.

She looked crumpled, not her usually tall bright self. Laine was unsure how to answer: yes it was in the past, but she knew there was a time not that long ago when she would have done almost anything to see John again. He had invaded her soul. Her dreams were often snatches of him, did that count as over?

“I haven’t seen or heard from him since Italy.” Laine’s words gave no hint of what lay beneath them.

She had not lied to Tony: this was a fact but it was not everything. She could hear Eurythmics’ “Sweet Dreams” album coming from the sitting room, and she could hear Ella’s laugh. It was good to hear laughter.

“You’d better take the drinks in or we may have a mutiny on our hands”, said Laine, trying to put a sense of normality back into what had turned into the weekend from hell.

“We’re OK Laine, aren’t we?” asked Tony. It was rare for him to ask such a direct question.

“Yes we’re OK, we just need to find the arsehole who’s behind this.” She wrapped her arms around him and took a deep breath in, yes we are alright, she thought to herself.

The phone in the hall began to ring. “I’ll get it”, said Tony, kissing her softly on the top of her head.

Laine could hear Tony’s voice lighten; good, she thought, at least we can maybe have a bit of normality.

Over the next few weeks Andy pulled in some favours with local police departments. Andy’s natural charm and wit coupled with his “totally believable and credible” arguments put forward on behalf of his clients meant that in his short, but bright career he had made allies in high places. Working for Dawson Wright and Peller had opened many doors. He had access to some of the best minds in London.

He had discovered that the paper on which the photos were printed were limited to just two suppliers throughout the UK, of which only five shops were in the London area. As Professor Lochlan, one of his favourite law tutors had once told him, all you need is patience, gut instinct and a bit of luck to uncover the truth. Andy was convinced that the paper the photos were printed on would be the key, now he just had to figure out how.

Laine was uncomfortable to say the least about having her nakedness shown to so many people, but it was too late to worry about it now, she thought. Andy had taken all the photos and would get them scanned for prints. She doubted he would find any, but had reluctantly agreed to hand them over. He had however agreed to show only the “sleeping” shot if he needed to. The others he had promised would not be shown unless absolutely vital.

Chris phoned Tony once Karenna had left and explained as best he could what had happened. Tony had listened, bemused, with a slight grin spreading across his face.

“Well, well, well”, he taunted, “how the worm has turned”. He tried hard not to break into full scale belly-laughing.

“Less of the worm if you don’t mind, I could think of better analogies than that”, scoffed Chris.

“I think maybe this will go somewhere Tony, she’s like a different woman to the one we knew way back when.”

“Don’t tell me the love bug’s in town and visiting you young man?”

“Well I don’t think I’d go that far. Let’s just say she’s sparked my interest and I’d like to explore my options.”

“Right well, off you go exploring Dr Livingstone, don’t forget your injections…” Tony teased.

“You are just rude, Mr Black, and on that note I bid you adieu”, and with that he was gone.

Tony was bemused: who would have thought that Karenna of all people could transform herself from ugly duckling to swan? He couldn’t wait to tell Laine.

Laine was less than impressed. “I hope Chris knows what he’s letting himself in for?” She could not quite square the fact that anyone could change that much. Something niggled but she couldn’t quite get to it.

“Well it’s not very often Chris talks about women, well not in a way that I could repeat”, remarked Tony. “He’s definitely taken with her, that’s for sure.”

“He needs to be careful, the way she spoke and looked at me that night in the pub still sends shivers down my back”. As she spoke, a thought came and went, it was so fleeting it made her gasp.

“You alright Lainey, you’ve gone very pale?” asked Tony, concern spreading across his face.

“You don’t think it could be her, do you?” Even as she said it she knew how ridiculous it sounded, but something sang out to her, what was it she kept seeing but not understanding?

“Crikey, do you really think it could be Karenna?” he said, tilting his head to one side. Tony had not even thought of her as an option, but now realised that it did sort of make sense.

“You didn’t see how she looked at me in the pub that night Tony, she was pure evil.” Laine knew that if looks could kill she would have been dead that night.

“OK I know she’s weird but is she really THAT weird? I’m not sure, and besides it looks like she may have moved on. After all she’s seeing Chris now”, he said, sounding more confident with his reply.

“Well let’s invite them round…I want to see for myself that the evil witch has turned into the good witch. You know what they say… seeing is believing.”

“OK, I’ll call Chris tomorrow and sort it, happy?” he said. Laine nodded. She knew if it were Karenna then she was one screwed up lady who needed to be unscrewed!

Tony had been a complete rock and she was grateful for his support. She had not expected him to react that way, but to be honest she had not ever envisaged a situation like this. “Why?” was the question that haunted her over the next few weeks, invading all social situations.

Vestal was on the verge of going from a small independent label to a large corporation, this was no time for slacking. Press Conferences, tours, launches, junkets were in full swing but she found herself looking at everyone slightly more cautiously than before. Was it you, or you, or you? she would wonder. I am going to drive myself bananas, she thought. She realised for the first time that she was in a far stronger position than she had ever been. Someone had poured molten steel into the furnace, what they hadn’t banked on was the strength that came during the cooling process. Yes, revenge is best served cold, and that is where I’ll get closure to so many things, she thought. The phone rang and Laine answered.