Almost French

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Authors: Sarah Turnbull

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About the author

Sarah Turnbull is a freelance writer. Formerly a television journalist with SBS, she began working in print media after moving to France from Sydney over ten years ago. Since then she has been writing regularly for magazines ranging from
The Australian Magazine
to
Australian Gourmet Traveller
, and she is a contributing editor to
Marie Claire
. In the 1998 MPA awards Sarah was named Feature Writer of the Year for three investigative stories published in
Marie Claire
. As a student at the Australian National University, she studied Politics, Fine Art and French. Sarah dropped French after failing the subject in her first year.
Almost French
has been sold in the UK and the US, and film rights have been sold in France.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted by any person or entity, including internet search engines or retailers, in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including printing, photocopying (except under the statutory exceptions provisions of the Australian
Copyright Act 1968
), recording, scanning or by any information storage and retrieval system without the prior written permission of Random House Australia. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.

Almost French

ePub ISBN 9781742741765
Kindle ISBN 9781742741772

A Bantam book
Published by Random House Australia Pty Ltd
Level 3, 100 Pacific Highway, North Sydney NSW 2060
www.randomhouse.com.au

First published by Bantam in 2002
This edition published in 2010

Copyright © Sarah Turnbull, 2002

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted by any person or entity, including internet search engines or retailers, in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying (except under the statutory exceptions provisions of the Australian
Copyright Act 1968
), recording, scanning or by any information storage and retrieval system without the prior written permission of Random House Australia.

Addresses for companies within the Random House Group can be found at
www.randomhouse.com.au/offices

National Library of Australia
Cataloguing-in-Publication Entry

Turnbull, Sarah.
Almost French.

ISBN 978 1 86471 276 6.

1. Turnbull, Sarah. 2. Australians – France – Paris – Biography. 3. Journalists – France – Paris – Biography. 4. Aliens – France – Paris. 5. Paris (France) – Social life and customs. I. Title.

944.0839

Cover design by Christabella Designs

For Mum and Dad

Et, bien sûr, pour Fred

CONTENTS

Cover

About the author

Title Page

Copyright

Imprint Page

Dedication

 

Prologue

One

Two

Three

Four

Five

Six

Seven

Eight

Nine

Ten

Eleven

Twelve

Thirteen

Fourteen

Fifteen

Sixteen

Seventeen

Eighteen

Nineteen

Twenty

Epilogue

 

Thanks

I left Australia hoping to cram a lifetime of adventures into one unforgettable year. Instead, I ended up with a new life. I’d taken one year’s leave from my job as a television reporter with SBS in Sydney to travel around Europe. If I didn’t go now, I never would, warned a nagging voice in my head. Though, at twenty-seven I wasn’t much interested in hanging around youth hostels. The idea was to immerse myself in fascinating foreign cultures, to work as a freelance journalist in Eastern Europe, which in my mind bubbled with unwritten, hard-hitting stories.

It was in Bucharest, Romania, that I met Frédéric. His English was sprinkled with wonderful expressions like ‘foot fingers’ instead of toes and he seemed charming, creative and complicated—very French, in other words. When he’d invited me to visit him in Paris, I’d hesitated just long enough to make sure he was serious before saying yes. Why not? After all, this is what travelling is all about, isn’t it: seizing opportunities, doing things you wouldn’t normally do, being open to the accidental?

That trip to Paris was almost eight years ago now. And except for four months when I resumed my travels, I have been living here ever since.

It was a city and culture I was familiar with—at least that’s
what I thought back then. As a child my family had toured France in a tiny campervan and my eyes had popped at the chocolates and the cheeses. At secondary school I studied French and saw a few films by Truffaut and Resnais which had struck me as enigmatic and European, although I couldn’t have said why. When I was sixteen we lived in England for a year and I came to Paris several times. In my mind, these experiences added up to knowledge of France and some understanding of its people. Then, a little over ten years later, my meeting with Frédéric drew me back, and when the time came to actually live in Paris, I figured belonging and integrating would take merely a matter of months.

Now, remembering my early naiveté draws a wry smile. The truth is, nearly all my preconceptions of France turned out to be false. It hardly needs to be said that living in a place is totally different from visiting it. And yet this blatantly obvious statement does need to be said, particularly about Paris, the most visited city in the world. A place I imagined to know after a few nights in a closet-sized hotel room as a teenager and one summer holiday with a Frenchman sipping
kir
on café terraces.

At times the learning curve has seemed almost vertical. The social code I discovered in France wasn’t just different from my Australian one, it was diametrically opposed to it. For a long time, I couldn’t fathom the French and, to be fair, they couldn’t fathom me either. My clothes, my smile—even how much I drank—set me apart. During my first year, dinner parties turned into tearful trials. There I was, a confident twenty-eight-year-old with the confidence knocked out of me, spending cheese courses locked in somebody’s loo, mascara streaming down my cheeks.

It hasn’t all been tears and trials, of course. The truth is, if
France failed to live up to some of my expectations, in other ways the reality has been far richer, a thousand times better than my clichéd visions. My work as a journalist has enabled me to meet people ranging from famous French fashion designers to master chefs. On a personal level I’d taken a headlong plunge into new territory as well. Put a very French Frenchman together with a strong-willed Sydney girl (who is actually far more Australian than she’d ever realised), and the result is some fairly spectacular—and sometimes hilarious—cultural clashes.

If I had to pick one word to sum up my life in France, it’d have to be ‘adventure’. Every moment has been vivid, intensely felt. No doubt many people who live in a foreign country would say the same thing. But there is, I think, something that sets this country apart from many other parts of the world. I know of no other place that is so fascinating, yet so frustrating. France is like a maddening, moody lover who inspires emotional highs and lows. One minute it fills you with a rush of passion, the next you’re full of fury, itching to smack the mouth of some sneering shopkeeper or smug civil servant. Yes, it’s a love–hate relationship. But it’s charged with so much mystery, longing and that French speciality—
séduction
—that we can’t resist coming back for more.

From where I write in Paris today, I see a foil shimmer of rooftops, a few orange chimney pots, quaintly crooked windows and lots of sky. Although by this city’s standards it’s nothing special, to me it is precious, this view. It makes me think back to a time when we didn’t have it, when we were living in a different apartment where I wasn’t nearly as happy. Those early difficult years in France seem a lifetime ago now, as though they were lived by someone else. So much has changed since then, including me, probably. The
truth is, when I started to write this book I had trouble taking myself back to that time. I don’t know why it should have been so difficult. Either I’d forgotten or subconsciously didn’t want to remember or, being a journalist, I was paralysed by the idea of writing in the first person. Probably a combination of all three.

For days and weeks, I sat staring at my rectangle of pearl-grey sky. For inspiration I looked at old photos, read my early articles and Mum sent me all the letters I’d written from France, which she’d carefully kept. The memories came back gradually, growing sharper and brighter until I could see myself on that summer’s day almost eight years ago, excited but nervous, arriving in Paris in my safari shorts and flat, clumpy sandals, oblivious to the horror my outfit would inspire in any self-respecting Frenchman.

And suddenly it seemed as though it happened only yesterday.

This isn’t like me.

 

The queue for passport inspection at Charles de Gaulle airport surges impatiently. My flight from Romania has coincided with one arriving from Mali and I curse the rotten timing because at this rate it’ll take all day. The French police scrutinise the passports from Eastern Europe and Africa, ask lots of questions. The queue isn’t really a line but a claustrophobic knot and I am somewhere in the middle of it, surrounded by women in bright headscarves and cumbrous robes, and tall, athletic men. Their blue-black faces shine: it’s hot and stuffy. More passengers pour from planes and we squash together tighter and tighter, our clothes and skins sticking together.

 

I’m not the sort of girl who crosses continents to meet up with a man she hardly knows.

 

I’d intended to give the passport officer a piece of my mind when it was my turn at the window—a few helpful suggestions. Like, how about concentrating on the task at hand instead of idly chatting with your colleagues? And haven’t the French ever heard of those rope railings which arrange
queues in neat snake configurations? But he stamps my passport with barely a glance, smiling charmingly as he says, ‘
Bonne journée, Mademoiselle
,’ and after all that waiting suddenly I’m through the bottleneck and officially in France.

 

Paris hadn’t even been part of my travel plan.

 

I’m in a space ship. Terminal One is a galactic sphere traversed by transparent tubes which are speeding people in different directions. I take one going up. The impression of breathtaking modernity is dashed by the general rundown appearance of the place. If this is a space ship, it’s a pretty outdated model. At the top, luggage is being spat onto a conveyer belt which keeps stopping and starting. After another interminably long wait, my tattered blue backpack tumbles out.

 

Yet here I am, coming to see—no, stay with—a Frenchman with whom I have conversed for a grand total of, oh, maybe forty-five minutes.

 

Glass doors slide open. I push the luggage trolley down the ramp into the arrivals lounge. I wonder if I’ll recognise him straightaway. A couple of months have passed since we met. But to my surprise, there’s no-one in the crowd who even remotely resembles my mental snapshot. I steer the trolley over to an exposed seat near the glass exit, apprehension squeezing my chest.

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