Almost Summer (5 page)

Read Almost Summer Online

Authors: Susan Mallery

BOOK: Almost Summer

5.53Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub

Read Book Download Book

“You never were.”

“No.” He sipped his brandy. “The fault is mine. I shouldn’t
have taken the easy way out, marrying her.”

“She was in love with you.”

“I took advantage of that.”

“You gave her what she wanted. She was happy.”

Alistair wasn’t so sure. “I could have done better. Been there
for her more.”

“Then you wouldn’t have been the man she loved. Your remoteness
was part of your appeal.”

Alistair raised his eyebrows. “Have you been reading women’s
magazines, old man? Your insight is disconcerting.”

Simon laughed. “I have been blessed with the love of a woman
who exceeds me at every turn. She surprises me and delights me.” He raised his
glass. “I could never leave her.”

Alistair wasn’t surprised. While Simon had always been a caring
individual, he’d kept that side of himself locked away. Few had known the gentle
soul trapped behind the scarred and gruff exterior. He’d held himself apart from
those around him—choosing a solitary existence over ever belonging.

Somehow Montana had changed that. She’d drawn him in and
allowed him to express his true self. He was a different man now. Much like the
infamous Ebenezer Scrooge, Simon had discovered the joy of loving life.

“You didn’t love Sara enough,” Simon said bluntly. “That is the
crime for which you feel punishment is necessary. If you had loved her enough,
you wouldn’t have left her behind. Or gone away yourself. Therefore, your lack
of love is the reason she died.”

Alistair stared into his glass. “I preferred you before you
could articulate what you were thinking.”

“That doesn’t change the truth.”

“I suppose not.”

Simon leaned toward him. “You don’t have as much power as you
think. She still would have died. As there is no way to undo the past, what it
comes down to is what will you do with the information now that you have it?
Learn from it or continue to punish yourself?”

“Probably the latter.”

“Then you’re a fool.”

“I think we can both agree on that,” Alistair told him.

Knowing and accepting were not the same thing. He wanted to
move on, but didn’t believe he had the right.

“How did you know about Montana?” he asked quietly.

Simon smiled. The scarred half of his face barely moved, but
the rest of it curved into a happy, knowing grin.

“She allowed me to feel again,” he said simply. “She gave
herself so fully, I couldn’t resist responding in kind. I wanted her from the
first second I saw her, but what I didn’t realize was that I also loved her from
that first moment. It took me a while to figure it all out. I nearly left her.
What a mistake that would have been. Without her, there is nothing.”

A raw truth, Alistair thought, almost uncomfortable with his
friend’s honesty. What would it be like to have someone like that? A woman he
loved so much he couldn’t leave her?

The face that came into sharp relief wasn’t Sara’s. It was the
face of the beautiful angel who had saved him.

On the surface, Paige was perfect. She wanted to travel, she
was open and giving. He knew immediately what she had to offer any man lucky
enough to steal her heart. But what about what she deserved? Could he forgive
himself enough to give her all she needed? Or was the kindest act to simply walk
away?

Chapter Seven

Paige listened to the soft-spoken woman on the CD, then
turned and stared. “Seriously? What?”

The recording repeated the statement, which sounded more like a
blur of sound than anything that made sense.

“Dove, what?”

“Dove é il ristorante,” the recording obliged.

“Is that a statement or a question?” she asked. “Isn’t it
supposed to be a question? Where is the restaurant? Shouldn’t your voice go up
at the end? Is that regional?”

She flipped over the steaks she’d been marinating, then stuck
the dish back into the refrigerator. A quick glance at the clock told her that
Alistair would be arriving shortly. They were having dinner together. Their last
dinner. He was leaving in the morning.

She told herself not to be sad. That knowing him had allowed
her to remember her dreams and follow them. She would always be grateful. The
fact that she might have fallen a little in love with him was an issue she would
deal with later.

She replaced her “ Italian1” CD with something more appropriate
for dinner, then raced upstairs to change her clothes. Thirty minutes later she
was in a sundress, with her hair curled. She’d put on a bit of makeup and
slipped into cute flats. As they were going to eat outside, heels would be
silly, but she still wanted to look nice.

While she’d settled on their dinner menu, she hadn’t chosen
dessert. There were a couple of cupcakes in a pink box on the counter, but she
was considering something else entirely. Inviting Alistair into her bed.

She didn’t usually take relationships to that level. With him
leaving and the real possibility that she would never see him again, sharing
cupcakes made a lot more sense than giving him her body. But while her head
could make the argument, her heart knew that showing how much she cared was
important, too. Not for him, but for herself. What she hadn’t decided was if she
was willing to risk it all, knowing there wasn’t the promise of a happy
ending.

She still hadn’t decided when he knocked on her door.

She raced to the front of the house and let him in. When they
were standing in her living room, she faced him.

“Hi,” she said. “I’ve been busy. Everything is coming together,
as it’s meant to be. I’m learning Italian, which isn’t going very well. But
that’s okay. Montana’s sister, Nevada, works at the big construction site on the
edge of town. They’ve hired a new manager and he has a wife and a little boy and
they’re looking to rent a house for six months. They’ve been by and they love
the place and they want to start the lease on the first. Which is exactly the
amount of time I need to get ready.”

She paused for breath. Part of her was aware of him watching
her, of how his dark blue eyes seemed to see all the way to the very heart of
her, but not in a scary way. Instead, she felt cared for and, well, adored.

She told herself she was being silly, but the feeling wouldn’t
go away.

“I haven’t bought my tickets yet,” she went on. “I have told
everyone I was going and they’re being so supportive. My banker reminded me
about two CDs I have that will mature on the fifteenth, so as soon as that
happens, I’ll have the money for the plane and the hotel deposits. I already
have my passport, so I’m really doing it.”

“You are,” he murmured, lightly touching her face. “Good for
you.”

She liked the feel of his fingers on her skin. The soft contact
made her want to lean in and kiss him. There was need, she realized, but also
something more. Something deeper. The hunger to connect with this man. To know
all of him intimately.

“You’re the reason, Alistair. You reminded me that I would
always love Aunt Sophia. That I didn’t have to stay stuck to prove it. Thank you
for that.” She smiled. “You gave me the kick in the rear I needed.”

“You would have gotten there on your own.”

She was less sure about that, but it was oddly difficult to
speak. Her breath quickened and her clothes were uncomfortable. Need grew,
traveling through her body on heated blood.

She wanted to tell him about the steaks she had marinating and
the salad she’d prepared earlier. But instead of mentioning that, she stepped
forward and put her hands on his shoulders.

It was, apparently, what he’d been waiting for, because he
wrapped his arms around her and pulled her hard against him. They were touching
everywhere and then his mouth was on hers.

She let herself get lost in his kiss and when he took her
upstairs, she got lost in the rest of him.

* * *

Two hours later they were back downstairs. Alistair had
pulled on his jeans and his shirt, but left off his shoes and socks. Paige wore
her dress and nothing else. Knowing a beautiful woman was nearly naked beside
him made it difficult to concentrate, he discovered as he prepared to barbecue
the steaks.

Every time she walked past him, he was aware of her. He
couldn’t seem to stop staring at her breasts as they moved. Telling himself he
was a trained medical professional didn’t make the sensation any less intense.
Warning himself that fire was dangerous didn’t lessen his desire, either. Even
though they’d just made love, he wanted her again.

She walked out of the kitchen with the steaks on a plate. Her
expression was relaxed and content, her eyes knowing. She looked like what she
was—a woman who had been well-satisfied.

He could still taste her and feel her skin, hear her moans as
he gave himself over to her while she shuddered beneath him.

Her mouth curved into a slow, sexy smile. “Stop it,” she told
him.

“What?”

“Thinking about it. At this rate, we’ll never get dinner.”

He took the plate from her and put it next to the barbecue,
then pulled her close. “Food is highly overrated.”

She reached for his hands and placed them on her breasts. As
his fingers explored her, her pupils dilated and her breath caught.

“Maybe you’re right,” she whispered.

He kissed her, moving his tongue against hers. She leaned into
him. He dropped his hands to her hips and pulled up her dress until he could
touch bare skin. Wanting poured through him until he was hard and ready and—

He drew back and stared at her.

“What?” she asked.

He shook his head, not ready to admit to her what he couldn’t
even admit to himself. Only the truth wouldn’t be denied. It took root in his
mind and grew until it threatened to consume him.

“I can’t do this.”

She swallowed. “Dinner, or…” Her voice trailed off as her mouth
trembled. “Alistair?”

He took her hands in his.

The words were there, waiting to be spoken. They required
forgiveness, of himself mostly. And a willingness to admit that before, with
Sara, he’d taken what was offered. An easy solution. He’d been too wrapped up in
his work to want to truly engage his heart.

“I was wrong before. I hurt someone I cared about because I
wasn’t willing to be honest.” He stared at her. “I won’t do that again. I’m
sorry, Paige, but I can’t leave you. I won’t leave you.”

He tried to smile and couldn’t. He could only hope she would
understand, would feel the same and agree.

“I know you have your heart set on Paris, but perhaps you could
consider Australia and Thailand first. We could go to France after that. Or if
you don’t want to change your plans, then I’ll wait. If you’ll have me. I’ll
wait and then we can be together.”

She drew her eyebrows together. “I don’t understand. Are you
asking me to go with you?”

“I’m telling you that I love you and I’m doing a very good job
of it.” He touched her face with one of his hands. “I love you, Paige. You have
shown me what was missing in my life. What I tried my best to avoid. I couldn’t
understand how Simon could give up his work for a woman, but now I see what he
was trying to tell me. That loving Montana makes him better at what he
does.”

He kissed her. “I love you and yes, I’m asking you to come with
me. We’ll travel the world, and in between we’ll come home to Fool’s Gold.”

The trembling began deep inside. Paige heard the words and yet
couldn’t quite believe them. Alistair was still talking, repeating what he’d
said about Australia and how he would wait for her if she wanted to go to Italy
first.

She felt tears in her eyes and then she was laughing and
throwing herself at him. He caught her against him and hung on as if he would
never let go.

“I love you, too,” she murmured before kissing him.

Later she would tell him that Italy would wait. That she was
thrilled to go to Australia and Thailand. That she would go anywhere with him.
But
for now it was enough to be in his arms, knowing this was
where she would spend the rest of her life.

She felt a whisper of touch against her back. A presence. As if
Sophia were there, happy for her. Then the sensation was gone, as though a
spirit had been set free. Love had always been the answer, Paige realized. And
now it would always be hers.

* * * * *

Summer Love Can Last a Lifetime…

If you enjoyed
Almost Summer,
don’t miss the Susan Mallery’s new
Fool’s Gold
trilogy featuring three California cowboys who find love in the unlikeliest of places.

Summer Days
(June 2012)