Always Been Mine (16 page)

She shook her head and let out a laugh. “You just scared the hell out of me, that’s all.”

Alex looked around at the empty parking lot and pressed his lips together. “Well, it is pretty dangerous you being out here so late and all alone. You really-”

“No it’s not that, I work late all the time. It’s just that… well,… nothing. I’ve just been a mess lately.” She leaned against her car and tilted her head slightly. “So, why are you here?”

Alex stared at her, wondering why she was so jumpy. Was that idiot still harassing her? Then he thought about her question. “I wanted to talk to you.”

He hadn’t been able to wait until tomorrow. There was always the possibility she’d show up with Luke and ruin the whole bonfire idea. He knew it was a risk. But the last weeks had been the most agonizing weeks of his life. So, he decided he’d take his chances.

Her expression was unreadable, and she didn’t say anything for few moments. “About what, Alex?” She finally asked.

“I know you’re with someone now.” His own words were hurt. “But I thought maybe you could hear me out.” For once, she didn’t avoid his eyes. She stared right at him. “Can we go somewhere and talk? I’ll buy you a drink. It’s the least I can do after scaring the hell outta you.” He smiled and thought he saw corner of her lip lift a little. “Might help calm the nerves?”

The expression she made at that was a strange one. She seemed almost alarmed. “No,” she said firmly and walked around to get in her car. “Just follow me. I know a good place we can talk.”

Alex followed her and thought about the uncompromising attitude she had when it came to dropping off her car. Was there someone there that wouldn’t be pleased seeing her get in his car? He rolled his neck and tried cracking it, something that always helped calm him even if only a little. He didn’t want to blow it tonight with his temper, so he took a deep breath before getting out of his truck.

The place Valerie chose was a trendy pizza and brewery place. Alex smiled as they walked in. He knew she would pick a place with food.

They slid into a booth in the corner. Since it was Friday night, it was already packed, and there a Padre game was on the big screen. Some of the people watching the game were pretty loud. Not exactly the atmosphere he’d hoped for, but it would have to do.

“As much as I scared you, I thought you’d want a place where you can get a shot.”

“Oh, they serve shots here.” She grinned.

The waitress came over and looked at Alex, but he gave Valerie the go ahead with a gesture. She never disappointed when it came to ordering food.

“We’ll have the large meat lover’s, deep dish. A large order of wings, extra ranch, and I’ll have schooner of Amber Bach and shot of patron.”

The server turned to Alex and took his drink order. He ordered the same, minus the shot. He needed a clear head tonight.

When the waitress was gone Valerie pulled her phone out of her purse looked through it for a moment, then put it back in her purse. That alone made Alex edgy. Was she checking for calls from her boyfriend?

“So, let’s have it.” She said, and again looked him straight in the eye. “What made you show up at my work and wait ‘til I got out? You’ve never done that before. I’m curious now.”

Alex drew a blank when he tried to remember all the stuff he’d rehearsed in the car while he waited for her. But he was glad he had her full attention. He was about to start when the waitress brought over their drinks. They thanked her and she quickly walked away.

Valerie took the shot. His train of thought went off course again, when she sucked the lime wedge and licked her lips. “I needed that.” Her hoarse voice didn’t help either.

Alex shifted in his seat, trying to accommodate his expanding crotch. It annoyed him how effortlessly anything she did could arouse him. He was a big boy now, who long ago learned to control carnal urges, yet with Valerie all that self-control seemed to fly out the window.

“Valerie,” He finally managed. “I don’t know how serious you are about this guy you’re seeing, but I want you to know I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Her expression changed. She seemed…
irritat
ed
? That definitely wasn’t what he was going for here. “What?”

Why else?
“Because I’m crazy about you.”

She seemed stunned but only for a second. “You’ve done this the entire time I’ve known you.”

“Done what?”

“Turn it off and on. I’ll give you that you enjoy…
being
with me. You can’t be that good of an actor, but I can’t be like you, Alex. I can’t just be with you then turn around and go out with others like you’re just another number in my contact list.”

“Well, that’s good to know, but I’m not like that either.”

Valerie’s sarcastic laugh was so loud the couple in the booth across from them glanced at them. Alex frowned and leaned in a bit, lowering his voice. “I’m not.”

“Is this really what you brought me here to discuss? Because I’m sorry, but I’ve heard enough of your bullshit to last me a lifetime. ”

Alex reached across the table and took her hand in his. “Listen to me, the girl at my place
was
a tutor. I can get you proof of that. It wasn’t the only time I needed to be tutored. I didn’t want you to know what a hard time I was having in school. It was humiliating, okay?” He took a deep breath.

Valerie glared at him, “She had an overnight bag, Alex.”

Alex’s brain scrambled to remember. Then it came to him. No wonder she’d been so hysterical. “That was her book bag, Val. She did her school work too, while she helped me with mine.”

Valerie’s eyes didn’t waiver, but her expression softened a bit.

He continued quickly. “All those times I’d disappear on you was because I had some damned paper to finish, or I was cramming for a test. I was having a hell of time keeping up. I couldn’t afford to lose my scholarship. I had to keep the grades up. You’ve always been such a huge distraction. Half the time you were all I could think of. ”

The food arrived and Alex had to take his hand back. Damn, he wished they had gone somewhere else. This was going to be one interruption after another. The waitress put out the plates and napkins. Valerie still stared at him.

“Anything else?” The waitress asked.

Valerie never took her eyes off of him. Alex glanced at her then back at the waitress and smiled. “We’re good, hon. Thanks.”

He told her all about the past year. The restaurant renovations, the wedding planning, all the time his parents spent in Mexico, making his presence at the restaurant more demanding and then about his grandpa’s passing. She listened and ate, asking few questions while he poured his heart out.

“That wasn’t a good time in my life. It was right after they told me I wouldn’t play football anymore and I lost my scholarship. I wasn’t the most pleasant person to be around those days.”

He glanced away from Valerie’s compassionate eyes. “I’m over it now. But not over you.”

Alex didn’t eat very much. He’d done so much talking, yet the food was just about gone. He watched as Valerie drank the last of her beer and stared out into space.

This wasn’t the mood he expected he hoped she’d to be in after spilling his guts. Maybe she
was
really into her new boyfriend. Maybe Sarah was wrong. Maybe he
was
too late. He swallowed hard.

Alex didn’t want to add any more to his already sinking heart. But he had to know, now. Had to know if all hope was lost. “Are you in love with him, Val?”

Valerie glanced away quickly. He pressed his lips together wishing to hell he knew what that meant.

He reached for her hand. “Are you?” The panic in his voice surprised him. He wondered if she noticed. He didn’t care anymore, to hell with his pride.

“No.”

Relief drained through him. Alex hadn’t even noticed he’d held his breath until he let it out slowly. He squeezed her hand. “Good.”

He paid and they left, neither speaking as they walked out. They ambled silently to her car. Alex wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms, but he would have to be patient.

That made her laugh. She thanked him for dinner and drove off without so much as a hug. Well, damn. Even after all the thought he put into tonight he still didn’t know where they stood. One thing was for sure. Tonight sealed it. There was no way he was giving up on her.

*

The drive home was longer than normal. Valerie purposely drove slow, thinking of everything Alex told her tonight. Could it really all be true? She didn’t even care about the earlier stuff, years ago. They were both younger and immature. Was it possible that he had really been studying and she just jumped to conclusions? She had to admit that before she and Isabel got close, she was having a hell of a time keeping up with her own schoolwork.

Ironically, it did help whenever Alex disappeared on her, because she would throw herself into the books to keep her mind off of him. Had he been around, she would not have worked so hard at it, opting for sure to hang out with him instead.

It did make a little sense, stupid as it seemed. He should have just told her. She frowned knowing that if it was all true he chose his pride over her feelings the whole time.

She got her hopes up so many times in the past. Like now, she wanted so badly to believe him and but each time, Alex trampled her heart.

The thoughts of seeing him with that other girl at his place came flooding back, twisting her insides. She vowed never to let him hurt her again.

What if, all this simply stemmed from the fact that he really believed there was another man in her life? She always knew that was something that would drive him crazy. He had always been that way from the very beginning, jealous, almost to a fault. He even admitted it, but seemed to think it was okay because he claimed no one else brought it out of him except her.

So, what if she gave into him, yet again? What if she got rid of her make-believe boyfriend, opened up herself up to him and he did something stupid again? She didn’t know if her heart could take any more.

Valerie was glad she’d insisted on taking her own car. It wouldn’t have been a problem if she left her car overnight, but she didn’t trust herself around Alex. Even with the fear of getting hurt, he still had a way of getting her to melt in his arms and end up in his bed. It happened so many times in the past, it was embarrassing.

Isabel was getting ready to go out when she got home. Valerie smiled. Before Romero, most of Isabel’s social life consisted of tagging along with Valerie, usually at Valerie’s insistence, like at the shower.

“Where are you going?” Valerie plopped onto Isabel’s bed.

Isabel stood in front of her mirror applying lipstick. She looked really nice. Her outfits were definitely sexier now that she was dating Romero.

“My sister set me up on a stupid blind date.”

Valerie’s mouth flew open. “And you’re going? Does Romero know?”

“Are you crazy? No way. I told him I’m having dinner with my sister. She set this up before I met Romero. I forgot all about it and I haven’t told her yet about Romero. This guy’s a friend of her husband’s from the service. He’s only in town for a few days.”

“Whoa, Isabel. You sure Romero’s not gonna find out?”

Isabel looked at her through the mirror. “He shouldn’t. He’s working some concert tonight in the marina, so it kind of worked out. I wouldn’t have seen him tonight anyway.”

Valerie knew Isabel was used to well-mannered easy tempered guys like Lawrence the professor. Romero was anything but. If his reaction to her not taking the relationship as seriously as he was was any indication of how he might react to this, Isabel could be in for it.

“You better hope he doesn’t Isabel.” Valerie made herself more comfortable on Isabel’s bed, resting her chin on the pillow.

Isabel turned around and gave her a look. “I actually considered telling him the truth you know. It’s not that big a deal. I don’t even know the guy. I’m basically just doing her husband a favor.”

“So, why didn’t you?” Valerie smirked.

Isabel turned back to the mirror. “I chickened out. When he asked if I had any plans for tonight and I said yes, he wasn’t happy about even that. So, I said it was just dinner with my sis.”

Valerie nodded. “I don’t think you realize how big of a deal this really is,
Izzy
. But I’ll keep my fingers crossed for ya.”