Always Come Home (Emerson 1) (13 page)

“My lord?” she asked. “Is something amiss?”

“No, Miss Conway, I just wanted to make sure you
were settled in. Is everything to your liking?” He peered behind her, trying
to get a glance of the room. He vaguely remembered it from his time exploring
the dower house as a child.

“It is lovely,” she said, pulling her dressing gown
tighter.

“Are you cold? I can bring more wood for your
fire.”

She shook her head. “I am quite well, and have
enough quilts on the bed to withstand the coldest of nights.” She hesitated a
moment. “Are you well, my lord? You look….” She bit her lip.

“Yes, Miss Conway? I am all aflutter wondering how
I look from your vantage point.”

“You look tired, my lord. And not just from the
journey.”

Her earnest observation caught him off guard. He’d
wanted to flirt with her, to perhaps coax a kiss out of her, as ill-advised as
that was. Any other woman of his acquaintance, any lady he’d flirted with, any
mistress he’d ever had would have known how to play this little game. She
would have told him he looked handsome or in need or naughty or some other
stupid thing. But Miss Conway had avoided the trivial and moved straight to
the heart of the matter.

He looked tired. And not just from the journey. In
truth he was very tired. He was tired of the responsibility that seemed so overwhelming
at times. He was tired of failing. He wanted to wake up in a world where all
those problems had been solved. Refreshed, able to start anew with a fresh
slate.

But there were no easy answers in life.

He wished he could answer Ava flippantly, but her
truthful observation deserved an honest response.

“I am tired, dear Ava,” he said softly. “And not
just from the journey. But, somehow, I believe you will give me the strength
to see this through. I think you have enough for the both of us, and the
generosity to share.”

He could tell that was not the answer she’d been
expecting, for her eyes widened and her lips parted. He wanted to kiss her
gently, as much to thank her for her presence than as an expression of his
affection.

But he knew that if he kissed her, his senses would
inflame and that one kiss would lead to much more. Too much.

So instead, he grinned rakishly, bowing slightly.
“If you need anything in the night, Miss Conway, do not hesitate to call out
for me. I should love to hear that above all else.”

She smiled at him, at ease once again. “I assure
you my lord, I shan’t be calling out your name this or any other night. Now,
if you will excuse me, we have an early morning planned in the woods and I for
one would like to be well rested.”

With a pert curtsey, she shut the door on him.

And he forced himself back to his room, somehow
feeling better than he had all day.

Though it had not been easy to get out of her nice
warm bed, Ava could not stop grinning as she set out for the woods with Colin
and his sisters. Earlier in the week, Rose had gone through the trunks in the
attic, finding warm winter clothes since the temperature inside the dower house
was not that much warmer than outside. That morning, Rose had supplemented
Ava, Maude and Stemple’s winter clothing. She’d even given Colin boots that
were good for something other than a grand appearance.

Though he looked quite nice in these warm ones, as
well.

Sufficiently bundled up, Ava had marveled at the beauty
of the grounds. The dower house and the manor were but a mile from each
other. The woods formed a ring around both, and Ava admired the tall, dense
trees as they trekked into the forest.

She watched as Colin pushed an empty wheelbarrow.
“Why did we have to get up quite this early?” he asked. “It is not as if we
had to catch the trees while they were still sleeping.”

Letty laughed. The little girl adored her brother
and Ava realized that he was both brother and father to her. She only hoped
his future countess would want to be mother and sister to the girl.

Ava did not think Colin truly minded the early
hour. “I believe, my lord, it is so we can get our work done here now,
enabling Stemple to hunt this afternoon.”

“I think I would have preferred taking my chances
getting shot.”

“Oh, no, Colin!” said Letty.

“Don’t worry, sweeting,” said her brother. “I was
only hoping for a superficial wound that would have allowed me to go back to my
nice warm bed.”

Once they had walked into the woods for a quarter
mile, Rose spoke. “We have much work to do, so I suggest we split apart.
Colin, I trust you can cut down boughs without slicing off any fingers?”

“I believe my chance of success would have been
greater had you let me sleep another hour, but, yes, I can probably remain
intact.”

“Excellent. Miss Conway, can you please gather up
the boughs he cuts and place them in the wheelbarrow? And pray, do not let him
stop after only one or two dozen.”

“One or two dozen!” said Colin.

“I can do whatever task you’d like, Lady Rosemary,”
said Ava. “But would you or Lady Leticia not like to accompany him instead?”

“The boughs may be a bit too heavy for Letty and
me,” said Rose.

Now that was a clanker if Ava had ever heard one.
Rose was a young woman in vigorous health. Ava could not imagine that picking
up boughs would be arduous for Rose or Letty. But as Rose quickly ushered
Letty away, Ava found herself alone with Colin.

“Trying to get away from me, Ava?” he asked.

“I just wanted to give you an opportunity to spend
time with your sisters,” she said. She was secretly glad to have the time
alone with him, but she certainly wasn’t going to tell him that.

“Truth be told, I am glad you and I are alone,” said
Colin, as he pushed the wheelbarrow deeper into the forest, examining boughs as
he went along. “It occurs to me that sooner or later I will come upon you
talking to my ancestors’ portraits and I was curious as to what you might say.”

“I shan’t talk to your ancestors’ portraits.”

“To borrow your own words, you should not make a
promise I am almost certain you cannot keep.”

“Perhaps the first thing I would tell them is you
have a lamentably good memory.”

“Rest assured, Ava, that I will always remember
everything about you.”

His words warmed her soul. Then she realized how
very much alone they were. Perhaps she should lighten the mood. “If I were
to speak to your ancestors’ portraits, it would only be after fastening a bell
to you so you could not catch me unawares again.”

“A true rake would ask on what you would hang it.”

“Your swelled head, my lord.”

He laughed. “I may have deserved that. Very well,
assume I am belled. What would you tell them?”

“I would tell them how very much I like Lady
Rosemary and Lady Leticia.”

“They’re wonderful, are they not?” Colin finally
found a suitable tree and began sawing through a limb.

“I can see why you wanted to come home so badly.”

“I shall always come home, as long as someone I love
is waiting.”

“That is a very good attribute, my lord.”

“It’s Colin. Now, what would you tell my ancestors
about me?”

“That it was very kind of you to bring Maude and me
along with you. And that you were quite resourceful in getting Carl to give us
a ride in his cart.”

“Will you also tell my ancestors about using me as a
mattress?”

“Certainly not! I would not want them to think less
of me.”

“From what I know of my illustrious ancestors, I can
only assume the gentlemen would like you even more for doing so. As for me, when
I think of that portion of the journey, I shall do so fondly.”

The look he gave her was so heated, Ava felt it
could melt snow. She nodded toward the branch. “Do pay more attention to what
you are doing, sir. You would not want to lose a finger after promising Lady
Rosemary you would not.”

“If it gets me out of cutting dozens of boughs I
might seriously consider it.”

“My lord, hush! You would not want your sisters to
hear you complain.”

“Did you just hush me, Ava?”

“Most deservedly so.”

“I did not say it wasn’t deserved. I was just
surprised you’d done so. You are a minx. I should garnish your non-existent wages
and make you pay me.” The bough he was sawing finally fell to the ground. “Do
you think we have enough?”

“My lord, we have only just begun.”

*

Colin was enjoying himself immensely, though he’d
had the devil of a time getting out of bed that morning. The house had been
like an ice box. And he usually only saw the dawn while coming home from a
night’s entertainment.

But here he was in the clean, frigid air, delighting
in the company of his sisters and matching wits with Ava Conway. She was
wearing a grey gown today, not that any of it was currently visible. But he’d
glimpsed it at the house before she’d wrapped herself in layers of clothes.
Her eyes were the only part of her he could see and they had a special light in
them. Or maybe they were just tearing up from the damned wind.

However, they were crinkled up at the corners, so she
seemed to be enjoying herself as much as he was.

They moved to the next tree and he began sawing
again. “Did you always wish to be a governess, Ava?”

“Not at all,” she said. “I loved assisting my
father in his work. I’d hoped to go on for many years doing so, perhaps even
finding a place for myself in the world of archaeology. But he developed a
wasting disease and died years before his time. I was devastated.”

“I am so sorry.”

She nodded and he sensed that this time her eyes
watered not from the cold.

She finally spoke again. “He would have liked you.
He was a man who also valued family and honor.”

Colin could think of no better compliment. “Did you
try to attain a position on a dig after his passing?”

“Some of his colleagues had expressed interest in my
joining them, but I do not believe it was for honorable reasons.”

Colin narrowed his eyes. Those bastards would have
tried to take advantage of her. Just thinking of it made him angry. If he
knew who they were…

“Colin, your thumb!”

Colin looked down to see he had, indeed, been close
to cutting his thumb. All because he’d been thinking of Ava. “Do you think we
have enough greenery now?”

“I believe, my lord, that fewer boughs would be
better than a nine-fingered earl.”

Ava had been piling the branches into the
wheelbarrow. He took the armful she was carrying, accidentally brushing his
fingers against her breasts as he did so. “Pray forgive me,” he said, before
quickly turning away to deposit the branches and to hide the erection that had
been instantaneous from the contact. She was wearing a good six layers of
clothes and yet he’d become that hard that fast.

Her eyes seemed even brighter. “Tell me about the stories
you used to tell your sister.”

“They were nothing, really. I’d even forgotten
about it until Rose reminded me. I believe I first started making up the
stories as a way of drowning out the sound of our parents fighting. But then,
fortunately, they began spending more and more time apart, so there wasn’t as
much need for the distraction.”

“Yet you continued to tell her stories.”

“It was a way of spending time with her. When I was
home from school, she was usually in the nursery. It was only at night when I
had the chance to be with her. So, I would tell her stories, then we would sit
and talk. There is almost a twelve year age difference between us, so we were
not as close as James and I were. But I enjoyed being with her.”

“What of your other brother?”

“My other brother. That is a more complicated
story. He is Nicholas Chilcott, the Earl of Layton. We do not formally
acknowledge the relationship for obvious reasons. We are the same age and he
was the result of a liaison between my father and Nick’s mother. She’d already
borne the heir and the spare, so it was considered a minor infraction of
society’s rules when Nick was born and had the Emerson looks. However, when
the heir and the spare both died of illnesses, the old earl was outraged that
my father’s get would one day inherit. Old Layton made Nick’s life as bad as
my father made mine. It was one of the reasons we became friends at school.”

“Are you close?”

“There is still a bit of awkwardness. Neither of us
wishes to embarrass his family, so we keep a bit of distance. But he makes a
point to see the girls whenever possible.”

“I am not sure there is a polite way to ask this next
question.”

“Since we just spoke of my half-brother who was
conceived in an adulterous liaison, I cannot imagine what could be a more
sensitive topic. Unless, of course, it concerns my finances.”

“I must be an open book, my lord.”

“Not particularly. Though you do have an attractive
cover.”

Ava’s face warmed from the compliment. “Can the
Earl of Layton help you with your financial difficulties?”

“Nick has offered to lend me money, but his coffers
aren’t as flush as they could be, either. And he has problems of his own. His
current heir is his cousin, who believes he should be the earl, not Nick.”

“What of your brother James?”

“I haven’t heard from him for almost three months,
which is worrisome. He went to America to find his fortune. I just want him
to come home. We can all be poor together.”

“I have never had much money, but have been happy
enough. Now I have yet another question.”

“You are an inquisitive sort, are you not?”

“Embarrassingly so. Have you always made up stories?”

“I was required to do a certain amount of writing at
school,” he said, as he hefted the wheelbarrow and they headed off to find his
sisters. “I was never very good at it.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Are you accusing me of lying, Ava?”

“No. I am simply in disbelief that you would not be
good at something.”

“Yes, I am a veritable genius at everything I put my
hand to. Hence the life of luxury in which you find yourself.”

“You did not let me finish, my lord.”

“I do wish you’d stop ‘my lording’ me.”

“You are my employer.”

“Actually, I am the one who owes you money. I
should be ‘Miss Conwaying’ you and you should call me Colin.”

“That will not happen. At least not in front of
anyone else.”

“Ahh, I am finally getting you to soften your steely
resolve. Excellent. Now, you were just telling me how difficult it was to
believe that I could have human failings.”

“Not exactly, Colin. I was simply expressing my
disbelief that you would not be good at writing stories at school when you did
so well inventing them for your sister.”

“My sister was a young girl and a generous
listener.”

“Perhaps. But I believe there is a difference
between tasks you want to do – like making up a story for your sister – and
those you are assigned to do, like completing a composition at school. With the
right motivation I believe you could accomplish a great deal.”

Colin turned to her. “Perhaps you are the right
motivation, Ava. Perhaps I could write stories for you.” He wanted to kiss
her. Right there in the freezing woods. In another moment he would kiss her.

“Colin!” Letty’s infectious laugh reached them as
the girl ran up. “You would never believe how many pine cones I collected.
But then I dropped one and poor Rose sat right upon it when she fell over in
the snow.”