Always For You (Always Love Book 1) (2 page)

“I can’t do it.” I shook my head. “He doesn’t feel the same way, Laine. If he did, wouldn’t he have made a move by now?”

She sat down on the edge of my bed. “I think he has, Reen, and you just haven’t noticed. All those times he says, ‘Hey, Maureen, you going to that party?’ That’s his way of testing the waters.”

“Why wouldn’t he just say something, then? Tell me he wants me to go with him?”

“Because he’s a guy, toots. He’s got feelings, and he doesn’t want to get shot down. And every time he asks, you have an excuse, which would tell him you’re not interested, even though he looks at you like a yummy treat.”

“He does not. You’re only saying that because you’re my friend. I think you’re confusing pity with lust.”

“I’m your friend, yes, but I’m always straight with you. Did you ever think that maybe this little scenario is playing out across campus in Smith’s apartment, with all of his dude friends telling him that he needs to make his move and him claiming you only see him as a friend?
Talk to him
, Maureen. Lay it on the line.”

“I can’t. I’ll screw up our friendship, he’ll end up feeling uncomfortable around me, and then I’ll never see him again. At least this way, I can love him from afar. But close up.”

“Girlfriend, you are seriously mental, you know that?” She sighed. “But whatever. Just don’t come sobbing to me when he finally gives up on you and finds a second-best. When you have to go to his wedding and watch him walk down the aisle to some skinny society bitch, knowing the whole time that your husband is marrying someone else.”

I frowned. “Did you just quote
When Harry Met Sally
to me?”

Lainey rolled her eyes. “Of course I did, Maureen. It’s only the best-written, most romantic, funniest movie of all time. Plus, Nora Ephron was a fucking genius, God rest her soul.” We both paused for the requisite moment of silence. “But that doesn’t make it any less true.”

“Maybe not, but I’m such a damn chicken. When I think about telling Smith I’ve been madly, deeply in love with him since we met freshman year, I want to throw up. The idea scares me shitless.”

Lainey dropped back onto the bed to lie next to me. We both stared up at the ceiling. “So you’re going to do this—the sighing, the mooning, the gazing when you think he’s not looking, the screaming into your pillow in frustration—for the next four years?” She gave my foot a gentle kick. “Have I said I’m glad I’m moving back to Kentucky after we graduate?”

“Yeah, you’re abandoning me. Go ahead and rub it in.”

“And then what? You finish vet school, and you each go your separate ways. Exchange Christmas cards for a few years, until that stops too, and then you never see each other until we all come back here for our twentieth class reunion—”

“Hey, what about our tenth?”

“You won’t come to that one, because you just found out that Smith and his skinny bitch society wife popped out a kid. But twentieth is different. You think you’ve grown. You think you’re over him. Hell, you might’ve even married a consolation prize yourself. But then your eyes meet across the sub-standard buffet at the reunion dinner, and you realize . . . you’ve wasted twenty years being scared and spineless and not having who you want . . . so the two of you end up in a janitor’s closet going at it like bunnies.”

I tried not to giggle, but I couldn’t hold it back. “You paint quite a picture, Laine. Thanks for that visual.”

“Hey, it’s your life, not mine. I’m just the storyteller. So now what’re you going to do?”

I sat up and hugged my knees to my chest. “I’m going to talk to Smith. I’ll . . . I’ll do it after midterms are over, when I can think again.”

Lainey sat up, too, and pushed me off the bed. “Nope. Do it tonight, before you can talk yourself out of it. Go get a shower, do your hair and makeup, and I’ll pick out a smokin’ outfit for you. Smith’s going to the Epsilon party, right? He never misses one.” She offered me her hand, hauled me to my feet and smacked my ass. “Get moving, girl. Tonight’s the night.”

“Tonight’s the night.” I echoed the words, as my stomach clenched with equal parts dread and excitement. “God help me, tonight’s the night.”

“H
AVE NO FEAR, REINFORCEMENTS ARE
here!”

I heard Meghan’s voice before her red head poked around the corner of my bedroom door. She grinned at me and held up the pile of flattened packing boxes she’d brought. “As promised. And I’ve got some wrapping paper and tape in the car. I’ll go grab them.”

“Why don’t you hold on for the moment? We’ve got enough to get started, and we’re tight on space.” I gazed around my room, sighing. Who would think that thirty years of living in the same house, with a brief hiatus during college, would let me accumulate this much crap? And yet here we were, knee-deep in boxes, knick-knacks, books and clothes.

“Okay, where should I start?” Meghan stood with her hands on her hips, surveying the scene. “This is your show. I’m just a hired hand.”

“Yeah, well, don’t expect anything in the way of recompense, toots. This is strictly a charity gig. I’m poor now, you know.”

“Don’t worry. The only expectations I have are paper cuts and maybe a pizza and a couple of beers.”

“That I can handle. Why don’t you start with the books? There’re a few sturdy boxes from the liquor store in the corner.”

“On it.” She retrieved one of the boxes and began pulling books from the tall shelves that lined my walls, stacking them carefully. “I passed your mom on my way in. She seemed a little, ah, preoccupied. Everything okay?”

I blew my bangs out of my eyes. “Yeah. She’s picking up the pizza.” I concentrated on wrapping a small crystal box. “She claims it’s not true, but I think on some level, she’d started to think I was going to live here with her forever. You know, the widow Evans and her spinster daughter.”

“Shut up. You’re not a spinster.”

I nodded. “Oh, you’re right. I forgot about the husband and kids I have. Crap, where did I leave them now?”

Meghan rolled her eyes. “I just mean, you’re hardly old and dried up. Lots of women stay single later nowadays. You’re a modern career gal.”

Snorting, I reached for another pile of paper. “Sure I am. Or I’m the oldest single woman in Burton under fifty.” I watched my friend try to work out what I’d said. “No, it’s true. I figured it out the other day. Miss Charity, who works at the bank, is in her mid-fifties, near as I can figure. I don’t think there’s another unmarried woman in town my age or older until you get to her.”

“Maybe if you dated a little more instead of spending your Friday nights thinking about that stuff, it’d be a moot point.” She taped up the first box of books and moved on to another one.

“Uh huh. That reminds me, I need to send a change-of-address notice to the men knocking down my door, begging to take me out.” I lifted my own finished box and carried it to the hallway. We were getting a nice little collection out here. Pretty soon, I could build a tunnel.

“I’m not going to argue and point out that if you wanted to go out on dates, you could.”

“Yeah, with who? You took the last decent available man in town.” I thought about Sam Reynolds, who’d been more like a brother to me than anything else, and I gave a little shudder. “Not that I was interested in Sam that way. Ever. I’m glad he ended up with you.”

Meghan smiled. “Me, too. But while I’ll admit I happen to think my husband is the sexiest, most incredible man in town, I find it hard to believe he’s the last one.”

“Okay, maybe Rilla’s the one to blame. She snapped up Mason from under our very noses.”

“Were you interested in Mason?” Meghan’s voice was equal parts surprise and amusement.

“Not one bit. I mean, the man is seriously hot. He’s built for sin, he’s a huge flirt, and he’s sweet as sugar to boot. But other than that, not my type.” I flipped up the top flaps of a half-packed box.

“So exactly what is it you’re looking for, if it’s not someone like Sam or Mason?” She started on a new shelf of books.

“Ah, I didn’t say I wasn’t looking for someone
like
Sam or Mason. But there are definite aspects of those men I’d love to have in my OAO.”

“OAO?” Meghan’s forehead wrinkled.

“One and only.” I winked at her and then tilted my head, thinking. “I guess I’m looking for someone . . . easy. Someone who I can hang out with, who knows me and likes me for who I am. Someone I don’t have to pretend with.” Smiling, I stood up and stretched my back. “Physically, I’m not that picky. A little taller than me, in good shape but not too built, you know? I don’t want to be intimidated by how much he works out. A regular guy.”

“There’ve got to be tons of regular guys around Burton. Maybe you’re just not looking in the right places.”

“Oh, yeah? And just where do you think this battalion of regular guys hangs out, pray tell? At Mason’s? At church? Out at the farm stand?”

Meghan threw up her hands. “I don’t know, Reenie. But you have to put yourself out there to meet people. Your—what did you call him? Your one and only isn’t going to just walk up to your front door and ring the bell.”

“Maybe he’ll bring in his dog to the clinic. We’ll lock eyes over his only-a-little-bit sick pet, and he’ll say . . . ‘Hello, Dr. Evans. I’m just a regular guy, and I’ve been looking for a girl just like you.’”

“You’ve been reading too many romance novels.” She lifted a stack of paperbacks. “Exhibit A.”

“Yeah, whatever. Why shouldn’t my life be like one of those books? I deserve a beautiful happily-ever-after.”

“Of course you do. I’m just saying you might have to do a little something to make it happen.” Meghan lifted up the box and carried it out of the room. “So is your mom really upset about you moving out?”

“No. I don’t think so.” I stopped moving for moment. “I mean, I think she’s a little sad. I’m the last chick to leave the nest. Iona’s been gone since she left for college, and Flynn . . .” I rolled my eyes. “He left with all the big drama, of course.”

“And came back in the same way.” Meghan dropped onto the floor and began to put together one of the flattened boxes. “But it all worked out.”

“Yup.” My baby brother had left our small town the day after his high school graduation, full of ambition, determination and with a badly broken heart, since his long-time girlfriend Ali Reynolds had changed her mind at the last minute about going with him. He’d only returned about a year and a half ago, when our father had died suddenly. He’d been as surprised as the rest of us to learn that Ali’s daughter Bridget was actually his child.

As Meghan had said, everything had worked out. Ali and Flynn had gotten married about a year ago, and now they divided their time between New York City and Burton, where they’d built a small house on the Reynolds’ family farm.

“Still, I don’t think it bothered Mom so much because I was here. Or Dad was. And when I told her my idea about buying the old Walker house, she was as excited as I was.” I wrapped another piece of crystal. “But over the last few weeks, she’s been pretty moody. Maybe it just hit her that I’m really leaving.” The thought of my mom rambling around this big house, lonely and sad, hurt my heart.

Meghan stepped around boxes and piles of stuff to sit on the bed next to me. “Maureen, this is a good thing. It’s a move forward. You’re buying your own home, and now you own the clinic, too. Your mom knows that, even if it’s going to be an adjustment at first.”

“I know.” I sniffled a little and dug in the pocket of my jeans for a tissue. “I guess change is always hard.”

“Helloooooo!” A familiar voice floated up the steps, and I smiled.

“Up here!” Meghan answered, and we heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps running lightly up the stairs. A few seconds later, my sister-in-law’s head peeked around the corner.

“What’s this? I thought we were working. Packing and shit.”

“Ali!” Meghan popped up and clambered over everything blocking her way to the door. “When did you get into town?”

“Just now, basically. We pulled into the farm, and Sam told me where you were. I left Bridge and Flynn to unpack and settle in. I figured y’all could use some help.” She surveyed the room. “Seems I was right. Shit, Reen, how the hell did you accumulate all this stuff?”