Always Rayne (The ALWAYS SOMETIMES NEVER Rock Star Romance Series) (13 page)

“Everyone already thinks we’re doing it anyway.”

“And for once in your life can you just let loose and be young and wild? Even just a little?”

“I’ll give it some consideration. But first I have to make sure I’m not fired and that
I’m still going to be on tour with Nic and the band.”

“Please don’t continue to keep me in the dark. I want a play-by-play of what’s happening. Okay?”

“I will try harder to let you know what’s going on. I promise.”

“And promise me you’ll fuck
Nic Rayne. Please...”

“That I cannot promise.”

“You can’t blame a girl for trying.”

“I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Love ya, Roomie!”

“Love you too.”

“Who do you love?” I hear Nic ask as he approaches.

He’s alone.

“Where did everyone go?” I don’t see any sign of Brad, Raven, Leo or Xander.

“Brad went to make a few phone calls. Raven went to pack. Leo and
Xander went to find out where the creepy-as-shit reporter lives. They want to beat the shit out of him.”

I frown.
“Seriously?”

Nic
shrugs. “They’re tough guys. But they’ll probably just knock him around a little. Scare the shit out of him.”

“This isn’t high school. They could get in serious trouble.
Maybe even charged with assault.”

“The guys care about me.”

I put my hands on my hips. “And what exactly does this have to do with you? This story just adds to your reputation as a Hollywood bad boy.”

He glares at me. “If you really have no idea what this has to do with me then you haven’t been paying attention. The guys already know how important you are to me. How come you don’t?”

I can feel my breath catch as my chest constricts. It’s one thing for Nic to want me; it’s another thing entirely for him to care about me.

His
eyes are now blazing. “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you, Harper. I hope you realize that.”

I heave a sigh. “The damage has already been done.”

“I generally don’t give two shits about what’s said about me in the media but this is different. I’m going to do something I’ve never done before. I’m going to issue a statement. I’m going state that you’re a reporter doing a story and that’s all.”

I can’t help but laugh. “And I just happen to be sleeping in your bed every night. Do you think people are really going to buy that nothing is going on between us? Even I wouldn’t believe it if I didn’t know the truth.”

“You can sleep in your own bed.”

I can’t help the look of disappointment on my face.

“Don’t worry about the money,” Nic says quickly. “I’ll still give it to you.”

“It’s not the money. Not that I don’t want or need it. It’s…”

I turn away.

Nic
grabs my elbow and turns me back to face him. “Look at me, Shakes. What is it?”

When I look back up at
him, he looks pained. I realize this whole thing is hurting him as much as it’s hurting me. Or maybe it’s hurting him because it’s hurting me.

“I actually kind of liked sleeping with you.
And waking up in the same bed with you.”

He can’t help but grin.
“Me, too. But I think the only way we can hope to save your career is for things to look as professional as possible between us. At least while we’re still on tour.”

“Okay,” I agree but I feel like someone punched me in the gut.

When Nic touches my face it sends shivers right through me.

“I thought we were supposed to be keeping things professional b
etween us.”

He swallows but makes no effort to remove his hand from my face. “Sometimes I just can’t help myself. You’re just so beautiful, Harper.
Crazy clothes and all. I’m just so sorry this happened.”

“It’s not your fault,” I manage to get out.

“If I wasn’t such a fuck up and learned to keep my pants zipped this never would have happened.”

“What’s done is done. We can’t change the past.”

“You deserve better than this, Harper. And I’m going to make sure you get it.”

Nine

I know I’m in trouble when my cell rings and I see it’s my parents’ number. They rarely call my cell phone. They don’t make much use of 21st century technology. It’s amazing when they actually use a phone at all and they’re still using a landline.

I debate answering the phone. There’s no way they could have heard about the news story
, is there?

But why else would they be calling?

Just as I’m about to answer it I chicken out and let it go to voice mail. I wait a few seconds and then listen to their message.

It’s my dad’s voice. “Honey, are you there? We’re worried about you. Our neighbors, the
Webers, you remember them don’t you? Anyway, they use The Twitter and they told your mom that your name was all over it. That you were a trend. I’m not sure what that means but it didn’t sound good. We’re worried about you. Please call us when you get this message.”

Great.
Now my parents, like everyone else in the English speaking world, think I’m a huge slut.

Needless to say I don’t phone them back. I’m not sure what to say so sometimes it’s better not to say anything at all.

***

Another concert.
Another party. The only difference is that this time I am partaking in the alcoholic refreshments that are flowing freely.

I think all of the stress of being known as
Nic Rayne’s new sex toy has really gotten to me.

The small living area of our suite is crowded with people.
Party central
as the band likes to call it. It’s the same at every venue after every concert. A party in the guys’ suite. Lots of booze and plenty of beautiful blondes for the guys to choose from.

Well
, for Leo and Xander to choose from. Nic has been a good boy ever since our date in Scottsdale and has kept his pants zipped.

At least my boss stopped texting me.
That may not be a good thing though. Nic said he would talk to him and I’m taking him at his word.

I never texted Jackson back but he must have gotten the hint because his texts have dwindled down considerably.

My dad’s already left three more messages on my phone. I just haven’t gotten up the nerve to phone him back.

I’m starting to fee
l a little light-headed. Okay maybe more than a little. Perhaps it wasn’t such a good idea to drink that second glass of wine.

Nic
looks better than he’s ever looked. He’s wearing black jeans that fit in all the right places and a black button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I don’t know why but I find rolled up sleeves on a guy incredibly sexy.

And the fact that I haven’t had sex in months
; the sexual tension seems to be bubbling up inside of me like a volcano ready to erupt.

Not the greatest time for
Nic to decide that we need to cool things down. Things feel like they’re heating up on my end. But that could be directly related to my level of alcohol consumption.

“Are you okay?’
Nic asks as he takes what little remains of my second glass of wine out of my hand.

When I say, “I’m great,” it sounds like my words are slightly slurred.

“You’re not,” Nic insists. “How much did you drink?”

“Not that much.
Just two glasses.”

He frowns. “How much do you normally drink?”

“I don’t,” I admit.

“Come on.” He grabs my elbow and drags me into the bedroom.

“I think you need to go to bed.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Are you going to go to bed with me?”

“To sleep.”

I’m not ready to take no for an answer. I figure if everyone in the world already thinks we’re intimate with each other I might as well go for it.

I reach for Nic and right at the same time he moves. As I’m about to fall over he catches me.

“Thanks.”

“You’re really drunk.”

“I’m not that drunk,” I insist.

He looks skeptical. “Bed. Now.”

“I just want to tell you how impressed I am.”

Nic narrows his eyes. “Impressed with what?”

“With you.”

He grabs his chest and feigns shock. “Do you mind repeating that?”

“I’m impressed with you,
Nic,” I say as sincerely as I can.

He still looks surprised. “I actually did something to impress Harper Leigh?” He looks around. “Where are the paparazzi when you need them? The media needs to know about this epic event.”

I give him a playful slap on the arm. “Very funny.”

“I need to know why you’re so impressed.”

“You’ve been so honorable. No threesomes with Raven and the guys. No backseat blowjobs. You’ve been a good boy.”

He frowns. “I told you I want things to be different.” He pulls me close. “And besides, I have something worth waiting for.”

“Maybe I don’t want to wait anymore.” I move in close and reach for the top button on his shirt.

He grabs my hand to stop me. “What are you doing?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“It’s really not the best time. After everything that’s happened. I thought we agreed that we’d cool things down at least until the tour was over.”

“Didn’t you once tell me that I needed to get fucked? Now’s your chance. I’m ready, willing and able.”

He shakes his head.

I catch his gaze and we both stare at each other for a long moment.

“Everyone thinks we’re doing it. Even my parents heard about me being a gigantic slut on Twitter. So why can’t I at least benefit from being the slut everyone thinks I am?”

He’s still shaking his head. Surely he isn’t going to say no to a sure thing. Not Nic Rayne. The guy who sleeps with any girl who offers.

“Not now,” he says. “Not like this.”

“Have you ever said no to a girl who threw herself at you?”

“No.”

When he chews on his bottom lip I know he’s conflicted. 

“But you’re saying no to me.” I can feel tears start to well up in my eyes. In a few seconds they’ll be streaming down my face.

“Please don’t cry,” Nic whispers as be carefully wipes at the tears trickling down my face.

“But you don’t want me.” I snivel.

He’s eyes turn dark. “I never said I didn’t want you. It’s just not the right time. When we’re together, and we will be together, I want it to be special. I want it to mean something. You’re not the kind of girl that someone fucks in the back of a car.”

I swallow. I’m not sure what to do. Before I have any more time to think about it,
Nic leans down and places the softest of kisses on my lips.

And my entire body comes alive with his lightest of touches.

“I told you I’m not going to be with you while we’re on tour and I meant it. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be with you. I want to fuck you. Then make love to you. Then fuck you again. But it’s not going to happen until the tour is over. I’m doing this for you, Harper. So you can be a reporter and get your story and not have any distractions.”

As if Nic’s not a complete and total distraction each and every time I’m near him.

Before I can say anything more my cell phone starts to ring. I try to ignore it. The only people who would be phoning are Brooke, my boss, my parents or Jackson and I don’t really want to speak with any of them at the moment.

Not when I’m still reeling from Nic’s kiss. The energy in the air b
etween us is still palpable. 

But my phone continues to ring…and ring…and ring.

“You’d better get that.”

He stares at me like I’m doing something wrong by ignoring it. 

“Fine,” I harrumph.

I stop dead when I see the caller ID.

Jackson.

Shit.  

“I can’t talk right now,” I whisper into the phone.

“We need to talk,” Jackson insists.

“Now is not a good time.”

“Why?”

Jackson is one of the most persistent people I know, which should seem like an obvious trait for someone who got into Harvard Law School.

“I’m not at home.”

“Well, where are you?”

It occurs to m
e that if he doesn’t know where I am maybe he hasn’t heard about the Nic Rayne debacle. He’s not exactly a celebrity gossip kind of guy.

“You broke up with me, remember?” I spit into the phone. I can feel myself getting angry. I’m not sure why he
’s decided to contact me now after all this time.

“Yeah, about that.
We need to talk.”

“I’ll call you later.”

“Who is that?” Nic says loud enough for Jackson to hear.

“Are you with a guy?” I can hear disappointment in Jackson’s voice.

“I really can’t talk right now.”

“I made a mistake,” Jackson says, completely ignoring the fact that I told him I didn’t want to talk.

“Can we talk about this later?” I suggest.

“Is that Harvard?”
Nic booms.

“Who is that?” Jackson now sounds angry. “Why did he just call me Harvard?”

“I really have to go.” To my surprise, I actually hang up on Jackson. Not something I would have done two months ago. I’m embarrassed to even think about how many days I waited by the phone for him to call. And to say those words. “I made a mistake.” Or “I changed my mind.” But he never called.

Until now.

Does he have some kind of weird radar that lets him know exactly when another guy is interested and that’s when he decides to call?

When I look back over at
Nic, he’s got his arms crossed over his chest and he looks pissed. “I thought you said Harvard dumped you.”

“I did. And he did. I haven’t heard from him in two months.”

Nic looks at me and his gaze is penetrating. “What does he want?”

I shake my head but it’s the first time I’ve actually considered the question. Does he want me back? Would I even consider it? I’m not sure. I always assumed that we’d get married.
That we’d always be together. I think that’s why it was so hurtful when he left for Harvard and left me too.

But now
…things with Nic…it’s complicated.

“Look at me, Shakes.”

I glance up at Nic and his expression is so serious it chills me. “I need to know if you still want to be with him.”

I swallow. Right now I don’t know what I want. I feel like I’m drowning in a sea of confusion. Why does everything have to happen all at once? Less than I week ago I was alone and
guyless.

Now I seem to have more men than I can handle.  

“He left you for a reason.”

“He said he made a mistake.”

Nic shakes his head. “That’s not a mistake. You don’t do shit like that when you truly love someone.”

I look into
his eyes. Could someone like him truly love someone like me? It defies all logic and rationality. I belong with someone like Jackson.

Don’t I?

But I’m not sure he ever truly loved me.

Nic
runs his thumb down my cheek and I can feel myself getting hot all over.

“Harvard can’t have you.”

I swallow. “Why?”

“Because I want you,” he whispers into my ear. I can feel his breath on my neck and I shudder in response.

When he pulls me close I can feel him hard against me.  As our lips meet, it’s almost like we lose control of ourselves all over again. 

“Do you have any idea how badly I want you?” he whispers.

“This isn’t cooling things down. Quite the opposite.”

“I know.”

Before I can respond my cell phone rings again. We both tense.

“Harvard?” His voice has a hard edge to it. I’m not sure how som
eone like Nic Rayne could feel jealous, or the slightest bit intimidated, by someone like Jackson.

I look at the caller ID and shake my head. It’s my mom and dad.

“My parents.”

Nic
frowns when I don’t answer it. “You should talk to your parents.”

“And say what?” I fire back. I’m immediately sorry when I see Nic’s face. He looks like I slapped him.

“Did they see the news stories about us?” He gnaws on his bottom lip.

“No
, but they heard the gossip from their neighbor. They’re smart people. I think they can figure it out.”

“You need to talk to them.”

I shake my head. “I don’t know what to say.”

After a moment
Nic says, “Give me your phone.”

I shake my head. “No. Why?”

“Just give me your phone.” His hand is now outstretched.