Amazing Gracie (35 page)

“Seems to me that’s evidence you’re getting to be almost as laid back as I am,” he told her.

She seemed shocked by the assessment. “That can’t be.” She regarded him worriedly. “Can it?”

“Looks that way to me.”

“Then why are you asking me to plan a whole future? You never think that far ahead.”

“Because it’s time, Gracie. For both of us. I love you. I think you love me. Marriage is what people in love do.”

“But I still haven’t figured out when you work,” she said a little plaintively.

“I get most of it done when I can’t sleep for thinking about you.”

“I keep you awake nights?” She seemed very pleased by that.

“Darlin’, it’s a wonder I’ve caught a wink of sleep since the day we met. I figure the only way I’ll ever catch up is for you and me to get married.”

She laughed at that. “Now there’s a romantic proposal if ever I’ve heard one.”

He grinned unrepentantly. “I suppose we could go on sleeping together instead. That would probably solve the problem every bit as well. In fact, we could get up to speed right now in that fancy new honeymoon bedroom you just decorated downstairs. Somebody ought to test it before you take in your first paying guests.”

“Nice try,” she said, but her heart wasn’t in it. In fact, she seemed distracted.

He studied her worriedly. “Gracie? What’s really going on? Talk to me.”

“Nothing,” she said, and wandered off without giving him a chance to ask her any more uncomfortable questions.

Fighting disappointment, Kevin let her go. He’d been thinking about marrying Gracie for a long time now, ever since Aunt Delia and half the town had begun planting the idea in his head. He supposed Gracie deserved a little time to get used to the idea.

There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that she hated the idea at the moment. Hated it almost as much, in fact, as he’d disliked this scheme of hers to go into business with Aunt Delia. Not that that was working out too badly, something she liked to point out to him on a regular basis. Those two were like two peas in a pod, a couple of born conspirators. No wonder Delia had been so taken with Gracie from the moment they’d met.

Living with Aunt Delia had never been dull. Marrying Gracie promised to be equally rewarding. More so even, if you threw in the way she aroused him without half trying.

Besides, Gracie was the only woman—the only
person
—he knew who didn’t need anything from him. Her independence was her best—and scariest—trait. Until he’d spoken with his grandmother, he hadn’t had
a clue about where he’d fit into her life if she didn’t have to rely on him the way everybody else in his family did. Now it all made sense to him.

Even when she’d been scurrying away, anxious to escape the pressure of having to say yes or no to his proposal, he’d seen a hint of longing in her eyes. Gracie wanted what he was offering. He knew it. It just terrified her, the same way it did him. Committing to forever was a risky business.

So he’d give her the time she needed to think it over and evaluate it, do a damned cost-benefit analysis if that’s what she needed to do. If she came up with any more rational objections, he’d counter them. After all, he had love on his side, and rumor had it, especially among a certain group of Seagull Point gossips, that love conquered all.

26

T
here wasn’t a single moment all through August when Gracie wasn’t a hundred percent aware of Kevin watching her, and waiting for an answer to his proposal. Not even the thousand last-minute details for opening the bed-and-breakfast and planning Bobby Ray and Marianne’s wedding served as much of a distraction.

To his credit, though, he didn’t push. Whether it was a tactical decision or just more evidence of his take-life-as-it-comes way of living, she was grateful for it.

She wanted to say yes. Oh, did she ever. But Seagull Point was such a far cry from the life she’d envisioned for herself, the life she’d worked so hard to attain. She felt as if she were betraying her dream, drifting into something because it was comfortable and easy, when she’d always,
always
wanted a challenge.

Was that the real problem? she wondered. Did she want to have to battle for Kevin’s love, the way Marianne had had to wait and fight for Bobby Ray’s? Was Kevin making it all too easy for her, the same way he smoothed over rough patches for everyone else?

“That’s absurd,” she muttered. Perverse, in fact.

“Talking to yourself?” Helen inquired, sneaking up behind her. “That’s definitely a bad sign.”

“Sorry. I didn’t realize anyone else was around.”

“Which must be why you had only yourself left to talk to,” Helen retorted. “Now that I’m here, want to talk to me? For all of my chatter, I can also be a pretty good listener.”

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s Kevin.”

“No,” Gracie insisted sharply. “It’s the reservations and the wedding and the fact that the rest of the beds were due this morning and still aren’t here.”

“Quick excuses,” Helen praised. “You’re good at avoiding the real problems, aren’t you? Is that what you’ve always done? Filled your life with so many details and crises, you didn’t have time left over to deal with your own life?”

Hearing the truth startled her. It also stung more than Gracie would ever have admitted. She busied herself with the stack of reservation slips that Delia had filled in over the past week. That Helen had seen through her so easily was a shock. No one had ever taken the time to look beyond her surface calm and competence before.

“I’m not judging you, you know,” Helen persisted. “I can relate to exactly what you’re doing, because it’s what I’ve always done. It’s been worse since Henry died. I was in so much pain I couldn’t stand it, so I filled my days with shopping and charity events and parties. I was so busy I thought I must be happy. It was only after I met Max that I realized what had been missing.”

“Love?” Gracie asked.

“Love,” Helen agreed. “And, every bit as important, someone to share things with. What fun is it to buy a
gorgeous dress if there’s no one around to appreciate it? How rewarding is it to hand over a few thousand dollars to charity or even raise a few hundred thousand if there’s no one at home to remind you that it’s the people, not the dollars, that count? And who wants to go to a party if there’s not going to be someone to laugh with you afterward about the drunken guests’ tasteless jokes?”

Helen met Gracie’s gaze directly, then sighed. “I don’t know about you, but I miss the companionship as much as I miss the sex. I miss having someone sleeping beside me at night and looking at me across the breakfast table. I miss the tenderness, the quick, heated glance across a crowded room, the shared confidences, the stolen kisses when you think no one’s looking.”

“You’ll have all that again,” Gracie told her, praying that she hadn’t misjudged Max’s intentions the last time they’d spoken. He’d sounded as if he’d reached a decision about Helen.

“Yes, you will,” a masculine voice assured them both in one of the best bits of timing ever.

Both turned startled gazes on the sight of Max standing in the doorway. Gracie thought the always self-assured Max looked a bit uncertain of his welcome. She could have told him he needn’t have worried.

“Darling, I had no idea you were coming,” Helen said, rushing over to brush a kiss across his cheek.

Max shot an apologetic look toward Gracie, then swept Helen into his arms and kissed her soundly. When Gracie started to slip past them, Max snagged her hand.

“Stay for this, please. It’s important and I want a witness.”

“Witness to what?” Helen demanded, not leaving his embrace.

“I want someone around to see if you will put your money where your mouth is. Marry me, Helen. Let me give you back all those things you were telling Gracie you missed.”

“You were eavesdropping?” Helen demanded, ignoring the proposal.

“It’s the only way to find out what’s going on in that head of yours,” he said. “You’ve been amazingly reticent with me on the phone lately. So, darling, what’s it going to be? Will you marry me?”

Helen searched his face. “You’re serious? This isn’t just an impulsive gesture.”

Max smiled ruefully. “I don’t make impulsive gestures,” he assured her. “Ask Gracie.”

Helen grinned. “I believe she has mentioned that once or twice.”

“Well, then. Will you marry me?”

Eyes shining with tears, Helen didn’t hesitate. “Yes. Oh, Max, yes.”

This time when Gracie tried to leave the room, no one tried to stop her.

All around her people were saying yes and preparing to walk down the aisle. So what was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she take that same leap of faith when her love for Kevin was so powerful she ached with it? She was sure of it, sure of the kind of man he was. Maybe her reluctance was because, like Max, she was not inclined to impetuous decisions.

Yet everything she had done since coming to Seagull Point had been impulsive. She wandered into the almost completed kitchen, where the new appliances gleamed and the glass-fronted cabinets were filled with elegant china and sassy everyday plates covered with bright,
bold flowers. The contradiction wasn’t lost on her. It was as if the dishes matched the two sides of her personality—one cautious and old-fashioned, the other daring. She was just discovering the joy of being daring once in a while.

“Something troubling you?” Delia asked, coming in the back door and peering at her worriedly.

“No. I’m fine. I just have a million little details on my mind.”

“A million details and one man,” Delia countered, busying herself at the stove. “I came in to make some tea. Sit down and have some with me.”

“I really should get back upstairs.”

“And interrupt Max and Helen?”

Gracie managed a smile. “You saw him arrive?”

“Arrive and dash up the steps two at a time. Unless I miss my guess, he’s asked her to marry him by now.”

“He has,” Gracie confirmed. “I was a witness.”

“Perfect. That just leaves you and Kevin.”

“Please, don’t start.”

“You know I love you both. I just want to see you happy. Maybe if you told me what’s worrying you, I could help.” She gestured toward the table again. “Please. I’ll pour the tea.”

She brought two cups to the table, taking Gracie’s acquiescence for granted. Gracie noted she chose the bright ones with the daring red and sunny yellow design. Maybe that was an omen.

“Talk to me, Gracie,” Delia encouraged, her voice soft and coaxing.

It took her a while to gather her thoughts and work up her courage, but she finally forced herself to begin.

“I don’t know what I was thinking,” Gracie told Delia.
“I saw this house. The idea of a bed-and-breakfast just came to me and,
wham
, I was all caught up in it. I never meant to stay here, not when I came. I just needed some time to think.”

“Maybe what you really needed were some roots, a real home,” Delia responded. “Traveling all over the world’s bound to be exciting for a time, but settling down has its rewards. Obviously some part of you knew that.”

Maybe so, but Gracie couldn’t think of any rewards. Both of her parents had had a bad case of wanderlust and no money to act on it. She’d spent her whole life listening to them complain about being stuck in a one-horse town, though neither of them had had the ambition to leave. She’d vowed not to get caught in that trap. She’d had ambition and drive to spare.

“Name one reward,” she said. It would have to be a dandy one, too, if it was going to counter a childhood of terrible memories of an economically depressed town where no one, least of all her own parents, had seemed happy.

“I can list three off the top of my head. A good man, children, growing old together,” Delia said, her expression suddenly far away. “That was always what I wanted. Never seemed to find a man that suited me, though. Not after Kevin’s grandfather abandoned me. Probably my own fault. I never quite trusted another man’s feelings. I suppose I turned cynical.”

She regarded Gracie intently. “Don’t you do that. Don’t turn your back on love and family when a man like Kevin is just waiting for you to say yes. He’ll be a good husband and a wonderful father. You’ve seen for yourself how deep his kind of caring can run. He loves you, too.
That can be more exciting than traveling the whole danged world, if you ask me.”

Gracie wasn’t so sure. In her experience—which was not so dissimilar to Delia’s except for the pregnancy—men took off when the excitement of the chase wore off. They married someone else. She had the track record to prove it. It hadn’t made her bitter, but it had made her cautious.

Besides, she hadn’t left France looking for love. She hadn’t come back to the States seeking permanence. She had come…well, just because being away no longer satisfied her the way it once had.

To her astonishment she had found challenges right in her own backyard, so to speak. She had found a man who turned her knees to jelly and her insides to mush. So what if he lacked drive and she lacked the ability to sit still for more than two consecutive minutes. There was a lot to be said for unhurried, lingering caresses, just as there was for explosive, passionate, right-here, right-now climaxes. In fact, sometimes the two came together spectacularly well.

Suddenly she could see a little girl with Kevin’s sun-streaked hair lounging in a hammock with a book. She could see a little boy with her eyes bounding up the stairs and onto the roof in the blink of an eye. Keeping them safe, encouraging them to grow up with their father’s sense of family and commitment would be challenge enough for any woman. And Kevin had promised to take her anywhere, anytime, if wanderlust set in again.

“Where’s Kevin?” she asked abruptly.

“Repairing the widow’s walk last time I saw him. He was scared to death you were going to be tempted out there and wind up going straight through those rotting railings.”

Sure of herself at last, Gracie bolted to the top of the house. Inside her office, she paused for a moment, long enough to observe a shirtless Kevin leaning against the just repaired railing of the widow’s walk, sipping an icy glass of lemonade. He had the portable radio turned to an oldies station at top volume. He was at ease with himself and life, as near as she could tell, two traits she wouldn’t mind learning.