Amy Valenti - Not Your Damn Submissive (Denial #1) (9 page)

I might have ta
ken the edge off the ache of my cock, but in doing so I’d doubled the weight in my chest. It hadn’t been worth it.

Chapter
Six

Kat

It had been an agonising two days since that shoot at the bar. Almost a week since Callum had barged into my life.

I was starting to think I
’d go insane before the remaining time was up.

The production schedule was for six days of sho
oting followed by one day off—rinse and repeat. It was gruelling, but we only had a limited time before the network needed to see the pilot episodes of
Dark Hearts Broken
, so we just had to deal with it.

Today was the day off before we started shooting the second episode o
f the two-part story arc, and—as was my usual tactic when I had a day off—I didn’t bother getting out of bed until after noon. Despite all the early starts, I wasn’t a morning person. I had to make up for all the days of pretending to be a functioning human being at six a.m. somehow.

What did I plan to do with the rest of my day off? I wasn
’t sure, but getting out of my pyjamas seemed like too much effort. I curled up with my e-reader and a pile of hot, buttered toast to while away some time.

I couldn
’t concentrate on my book. All I could think about was what Callum might be doing with his day. Was he missing me the way I was so
not
missing him?

He
’d been true to his word over the past few days—completely courteous and respectful, without even simple flirtation. Every now and then I’d catch him looking my way during a quiet moment, and the heat in his eyes belied the calm professionalism he was showing me. I knew he wanted to throw me down and take me. He wasn’t trying to hide it; just keeping it at bay and reminding me at unpredictable intervals. Was he doing it on purpose? Maybe he didn’t even realise his emotions were visible on his face.

Sometimes he had his jaw clenched, but his face was completely impassive, giving nothing away. Those times more than any other made guilt twist in my stomach. It was as though he was shutting me out.

This is what you wanted,
I reminded myself, pushing the empty plate aside and sending the e-reader after it.

Why couldn
’t he be a normal guy? I’d have given in to him the first day we’d met. Why did he have to have this…this…fetish?

The fetish th
at so perfectly fit mine?

“
Damn you, Callum Connors,” I mumbled in the general direction of the bookshelf containing my
One Last Look
DVDs, and dragged myself off towards the bathroom. If I couldn’t concentrate on reading, at least I could relax in a bubble bath for a while.

* * * *

Callum

I knew I shouldn’t call her. She’d given me her answer already, and that answer had been ‘no’. I’d promised to keep things platonic between us, and I didn’t go back on my word.

So why was I so sure that if I could just spend
some time with Kat, outside of work, then she’d reconsider the arrangement we had?

Dinner between friends was harmless enough, right? We
’d go out to eat, enjoy each other’s company, and part ways at the end of the night—unless Kat decided otherwise.

I stared at my phone for a few seconds longer, then dialled before common sense could prevail.

“Hello?” Her familiar voice sent a jolt straight to my cock.

“
Hey, Kat. It’s Callum.”

I heard her slight indrawn breath, as though she hadn
’t checked her caller ID before picking up, hadn’t known it was me. “Hi. Did you need something?”

Oh, if only she knew how much I needed from her.
Rein it in, Connors.
“I’m about to grab something to eat, and I wondered if you wanted to join me.”

“
Ahh,” she said, her tone noncommittal.

“
Just dinner, unless you decide otherwise. You have my word.”

For a few seconds, all I could hear was her breathing. I
waited for her answer with an almost suffocating anticipation.

After a long pause, she admitted,
“I am kinda hungry.”

“
Pick you up in thirty minutes?” I suggested, making sure there was a casualness in my voice I sure as hell didn’t feel.

She agreed and gave me her address.

How I managed to get across town without being pulled over for speeding, I would never know. But less than thirty minutes later, I was knocking at Kat’s apartment door and reminding myself to show some fucking restraint instead of putting her
in
restraints.

She answered the door wearing tight black jeans and a red V-necked shirt that clung to
her body in all the right places. As she stepped back to let me in, I noticed she was barefoot.

“
You’re early. Let me just grab some shoes.”

She braced herself against the wall and bent forward to pull on some flat pumps, and the hint of cleavage she
’d been showing while standing straight became almost indecent. Her breasts weren’t huge, but each one was enough for a handful. I’d had my fingers buried in her hot cunt, but her nipples were still uncharted territory for me; territory I longed to explore and claim for myself. I looked away, willing my stirring cock to behave.

“
Okay, I’m ready.”

She stood expectantly in front of me, waiting for me to turn and go back out into the hall. I
’d have preferred to crush her against me and capture her sweet lips instead, but I made myself step back.

“
You look good,” I told her, before opening the door.

“
Thanks.” She smiled, followed me out, and paused to lock the door behind her. “So where did you want to eat?”

“
You’re the local. Got any recommendations?”

After Kat made a quick phone call, we ended up at a tiny Italian place downtown, a floor up off street level.
“This place is kind of a secret. Well, not really. It’s popular enough to fill up every night, but not that many people actually know about it.”

“
How do you?” I asked, following her up the stairs towards the tantalising scent of Italian cuisine and trying not to admire her ass too blatantly.

“
My sister married one of the owners.” She pushed open the door before I could get it for her, and we stepped into a small, intimately lit space that would have been cramped if it hadn’t been so charming.

“
There’s my girl!” A tall, annoyingly attractive, dark-haired guy pulled Kat into his arms for an enthusiastic hug.

She laughed and returned the embrace
with an easiness she’d never had around me. “Hey, Giulio.”

He looked over her shoulder at me, registered my probably
territorial expression and grinned, releasing her. “Hey, you brought a date.” Lowering his voice, he asked me, “Aren’t you that guy from that show…?”

I nodded, and
Giulio gave Kat an amused look. “Moving up in the world, huh? Dating actors these days?”

Kat glanced over at me for a second before telling
him, “Before you go running to Anna about this, hold up. He’s just a friend.”

Ouch.

Giulio met my eyes in solidarity. It was probably hard to miss how strongly I felt about his sister-in-law. “Let’s get you guys seated.”

While we looked over the menus, Kat hastily assured me the food would be amazing, despite the low prices of everything.

“You have some preconceived notions about actors, don’t you?” I said dryly.

She grinned mischievously.
“What, you mean you don’t eat lobster and caviar every night?”

“
One Last Look
was cancelled, remember? Not that they were paying me the big bucks in the first place.”

Kat looked rueful.
“I was such a huge fan of that show. Most unjust cancellation since Fox canned
Firefly
.”

“
At least we got two seasons.”

I drew her into conversation about the short-lived
crime show I’d starred in up until a few months ago, hoping she’d drop her guard and open up if I kept the discussion away from our current situation at work. She did seem to relax as we ate, listening to my behind the scenes anecdotes with obvious interest and asking questions about the crew’s methods, some of which I didn’t know enough to answer.

“
What I was really sad about, though,” she confessed, “was that the relationship between Benjamin and Chloe never got resolved. I loved that whole ‘will they or won’t they?’ thing the writers had going on.”

Back
when I’d played Benjamin, I’d really enjoyed those scenes I’d shared with Melanie Towers, who’d played Ben’s love interest. In fact, the way Chloe had kept pushing Ben away reminded me a little of…

She must have reache
d the same conclusion I had, because she immediately dropped her gaze to her food and went quiet.

We were only halfway through our meal, and there was a chance she
’d storm out if I brought it up, but I couldn’t resist.

“
The way Chloe was written reminds me of someone.”

Her shoulders tensed as she frowned.
“I don’t remember the scene where Ben totally thwarted her plans to take a vacation.”

“
I saw some fan fiction online where he spanked her, though.” I spoke quietly enough that no one at the neighbouring tables could hear us.

Kat stared at me as though the idea fascinated her on a purely fangirl level.
“You did?”

“
Mm-hmm.” Melanie had sent the link to me by email after spending all night looking at fan reactions to the show being cancelled. She’d known about my alternate lifestyle, though she and her husband didn’t share my interest.

For a second, I thought Kat was going to ask for the link to the story, but as soon as her surprise faded, she returned to wariness.
“Yeah, well…shame he wasn’t just into regular sex. Maybe ‘Chloe’ would have handled that better.”

M
y mind went entirely blank with surprise, then started up again, working fast.

She wanted vanilla when everything about her screamed submissive? I would never have thought it of her, but now that I thou
ght of it, her flashes of fear made more sense. She was terrified of her submissive instincts, not of anything I’d done. She wanted to hide from her innate need to submit, even as she was drawn to me.

“
Regular sex? That what you need right now?”

“
Shame you don’t do that, huh?” she muttered, actually seeming to believe it.

A bubble of hope rose in my chest, forcing a
low laugh from my throat. “Oh, I think you’d be surprised…”

I
’d had my share of one-night vanilla encounters in between submissives. As much as I loved D/s, occasionally I just wanted an uncomplicated fuck with no expectations on either side.

Vanilla was far from what I wanted
with Kat, and from the way she’d reacted to being spanked—at least during the heat of the moment—she’d be less than satisfied with it, too. But if she needed to start off slowly, I was willing to work with that.

Kat was staring at her plate, pushing food around it with her fork.

“You didn’t answer my question.” I slid my foot forward until my leg brushed hers under the small table. She startled at the unexpected contact, blinking at me, but didn’t move away.

“
What question?” she murmured.

“
Do you need me to take you home and fuck you all night long?”

Her cheeks flushed
red, and she scowled. “Did you have to say it like that?”

“
No. I could have gone into a lot more detail. Still can, if you like.” I pushed aside my plate. The food was good, but I’d lost my appetite for everything but her.

“
Not gonna finish?” she asked, deflecting the question yet again.

“
I’m saving room for dessert, but I’m not sure yet if what I want is on the menu.” I held eye contact with her, demanding wordlessly that she give me an answer one way or the other.

“
Do you really have to make me say it?” The words were irritated, but her tone was soft.

“
Yes.” I wasn’t taking any chances, not after how she’d looked after I’d spanked her the other day. I needed her explicit consent.

She took a sip of her water, still watching me, then put down the glass. I
noticed her hand was shaking slightly, but kept my eyes on her face.

“
Promise me.” She said the words quietly, but so harshly that it took me aback. “Promise me that you won’t do anything that’s…that you would usually do.”