An Inch of Ashes (8 page)

He looked down, grinning at the thought of her. Life was good. To have important business in one’s life and such a woman to return to: that, surely, was all a man could ask for?

And sons...

But that would come. As surely as the seasons.

He heard the hatch hiss open and looked back at Chang Shih-sen. ‘Go now, Chang. Put the papers in my study. We’ll deal with them tomorrow.’

Chang bowed his head, then turned away. Li Yuan sat there a moment longer, thinking over the satisfactions of the last few days, recollecting the great feeling of
ch’i
, of pure energy, he had experienced in dealing with these matters. Unlike anything he had ever felt before. It made him understand things better. Made him realize why men drove themselves instead of staying at home in the loving arms of their wives. And yet it was good to come home, too. Good to have that to look forward to.

‘A balance...’ he said softly, then laughed and climbed up out of his seat, making his way down the short gangway, the three servants standing off to one side of him as he passed, their heads bowed low.

Nan Ho came forward as he reached the bottom of the steps, then knelt and touched his head to the ground.

‘Welcome home, my lord.’

‘Thank you, Master Nan. But tell me, where is Fei Yen?’

Nan Ho lifted his head fractionally. ‘She is in her chambers, Prince Yuan. She has given orders for no one to disturb her. Not even her
amah
.’

Li Yuan grinned. ‘Ah...’

‘My lord...’

But Li Yuan was already moving past. ‘Not now, Master Nan.’

Nan Ho turned, his extreme agitation unnoticed by the Prince. ‘But, my lord...’

‘Later, Nan Ho...’

He ran through the palace, past bowing servants, then threw open the doors to her apartments.

She was waiting for him, sitting on the huge bed, her legs folded under her, the vermilion robe she had worn on their wedding morning pulled about her. Her head was lowered in obedience, but there was a faint smile on her cherry lips.

‘My lord?’ she said, looking up, her eyes as dark as the night.

‘My love...’ he said, the words barely a whisper. The scent of plum blossom in the room was intoxicating. Closing the doors behind him, turning the great key, he went across and sat beside her on the bed, drawing her close.

‘I’ve missed you...’

She shrugged the thin silk robe from her shoulders, then drew his head down into the cushion of her breasts, curling her legs about him.

‘Make love to me, my lord.’

Afterwards he lay there next to her, staring at her in wonder.

‘My love. My darling little swallow...’

She laughed then drew his face close, kissing him gently, tenderly. ‘Now you know how much I missed you.’

‘And I you...’

She pushed him back and sat up. ‘But you’re tired, husband. Why don’t you sleep a while. And when you wake I’ll have a meal ready for you.’

‘But, my love, you needn’t...’

She put a finger to his lips. ‘I want to. Besides, I am your wife.’

He made to protest again, but she shook her head. With a brief laugh he lay back on the bed, closing his eyes. Within a minute he was asleep.

She studied him a moment, laying her hand softly on his chest, feeling the soft rise and fall of his breath, then gently covered the soft fold of his spent manhood. She shivered. He was still such a boy.

She went into the tiny pantry and busied herself, preparing the ingredients she’d had brought from the kitchen only an hour before. It would be two hours before it was ready. Time enough to bathe and change again.

She lay there a long time in the bath, soaking, looking through the open door at his sleeping figure on the bed. He was no bother really. Such a sweet boy. And yet...

As she floated there, she found herself remembering the sight of Tsu Ma in the water, his chest bared, his hair slicked back; the presence of his boots planted so solidly on the earth beneath the table; the deep, warm vibration of his voice.

Tsu Ma...

She opened her eyes again. The boy was still sleeping. Her husband, the boy.

She shivered, then stirred herself in the water. It was time she dressed and saw to his meal.

He woke to find her sat beside him on the bed, watching him. He turned his head, glancing at his timer, then yawned. He had slept more than two hours.

He sat up, breathing in deeply. ‘What’s that? It smells delicious.’

She smiled and turned away, returning moments later with a bowl and chopsticks. He took it from her, sniffed at it, then tucked in, holding the bowl close to his mouth, smacking his lips in appreciation.

‘This is excellent. What is it?’

She was kneeling by the bed, watching him. ‘It’s a recipe of my grandmother’s. Wolfberry stewed with beef. A tonic for yang energy...’ She laughed at his frown. ‘An aphrodisiac, my husband. It enhances strength and endurance.’

He nodded enthusiastically. ‘It’s
good
. Your grandmother was a clever woman, and you, my love, are an excellent cook.’

She looked down, smiling. ‘My husband is too kind.’

He was still a moment, watching her, astonished for the hundredth time by the fragile beauty of her, then began to eat again, realizing with a laugh just how hungry he had been.

‘Is there anything else, husband? Anything I could get for you?’

He lowered the bowl, smiling at her. ‘No. But that reminds me. There is something I must do. One small thing, then the rest of the day is free. We could go riding if you like.’

She looked back at him, her eyes bright. ‘I’d like that.’

‘Good. Then I’ll call Nan Ho—’

Uncharacteristically, she interrupted him. ‘Forgive me, husband, but that is not possible.’

‘Not possible?’ Li Yuan frowned, then gave a short laugh. ‘I don’t understand.’

She lowered her head, making herself small, submissive. ‘I am afraid I had to dismiss Master Nan. He—’

‘
Dismiss
him?’ Li Yuan set the bowl aside and stood, looking down at her. ‘Do I hear you right, Fei Yen? You have dismissed my Master of the Inner Chambers?’

‘I had to, my lord...’

He shook his head, then looked away, past her. ‘Tell me. Why did you dismiss him? What did he do?’

She glanced up at him, then bowed her head again. ‘My lord will be angry with me...’

He looked back at her. ‘Have I reason, then, to be angry with you?’

She looked up, meeting his eyes, her own dewed with tears. He hardened himself against the sight; even so, he felt himself moved. He had never seen her as beautiful as at that moment.

‘I am your wife, my prince. Did I not have good reason to be angry with the man?’

‘Fei Yen... talk sense. I don’t follow what you’re saying.’

She looked down, swallowing, a sudden bleakness in her face that tore at his heart. ‘The girls... Nan Ho had brought girls...’ A shudder passed through her. ‘Girls for your bed ...’

He took a long breath. So ... She had misunderstood him. ‘Forgive me, my love, but you have no reason to be angry with Nan Ho. It was not his doing. I asked him to bring those girls here. That was the thing I had to do.’

‘And that makes it
better
?’ Her voice was broken, anguished. ‘How could you, Yuan? Am I not a good wife to you? Do I deny you anything?’ She looked up at him, the hurt in her eyes almost too much for him. When she spoke again, her voice was a mere whisper. ‘Or have you tired of me already?’

He was shaking his head. ‘No... never. But you mistake me...’

‘Mistake you?’ Sudden anger flared in her eyes. ‘You bring those girls here – girls who have shared your bed – and say I have mistaken you.’

‘Fei Yen...’

‘Then deny it! Look me in the eyes, husband, and deny that you haven’t
had
them?’

‘It wasn’t like that...’

But his hesitation was enough for her. She tucked her head down bitterly, her hands pulling anxiously at the lap of her dress, then stood angrily.

‘Fei Yen! You must believe me...’

‘
Believe
you?’

He bristled, suddenly angered that she could think this of him, after all he had done to purify himself for her. Hadn’t he cast the maids off? Hadn’t he denied himself the pleasures of their company this last year? He shuddered. ‘You had no business dismissing Master Nan! Who comes or goes in these rooms is
my
business, not yours!’

She turned away, suddenly very still. Her voice changed, became smaller and yet harder than before. ‘Then let a thousand sing-song girls come. Let
them
be wives to you. But not Fei Yen...’

He went to her, taking her shoulders gently, wanting, despite his anger, to make things right between them, but she shrugged him off, turning violently to confront him, the fury in her eyes making him take a step back.

‘What kind of a woman do you think I am? Do you think me like them? Do you really think I have no pride?’ She drew herself up straighter. ‘Am I not the wife of a great prince?’

‘You know what you are!’

‘No. I only know what you would have me be.’

He went to answer her, but she shook her head dismissively, her eyes boring into him. ‘I tried hard, Li Yuan. Tried to dispel my doubts and tell myself it was Nan Ho. I tried to be loving to you. To be a good wife in every way. And how did you repay me? By cheating on me. By bringing in those
whores
behind my back...’

He felt something snap in him. This was too much. To call his girls whores. Even so, he answered her quietly.

‘Be careful what you say, Fei Yen. Those girls were my maids. They took good care of me in my childhood. I have a great affection for them.’

She laughed scornfully. ‘Whores...’

His bark of anger made her jump. ‘Hold your tongue, woman!’

He stood there commandingly, suddenly very different; all childishness, all concession gone from him. He was shouting now. ‘It is not your place to criticize
me
.
I
have done nothing wrong. Understand me? Nothing! But you...’ He shivered with indignation. ‘To have the audacity to dismiss Master Nan... Who in the God of Hell’s name do you think you are?’

She did not answer. But her eyes glared back at him, their look wild and dangerous.

‘Nan Ho stays, understand me? And I shall see the girls, as that’s my wish.’

He saw a shudder of pure rage ripple through her and felt himself go cold inside. Her face seemed suddenly quite ugly; her lips too thin, her nose too brittle, her perfect brow furrowed with lines of anger. It was as if she were suddenly bewitched, her words spat back at him through a mask of hatred.

‘If that’s your wish, so be it. But do not expect me in your bed, Prince Yuan. Not tonight. Or any other night.’

His laughter was harsh; a bitter, broken sound; the antithesis of laughter.

‘So be it.’

He turned and stormed from the room, slamming the door behind him as he went, his departing footsteps echoing, unrelenting, on the marble tiles.

DeVore was pressed up against the wall, Gesell’s knife at his throat.

‘Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you.’

DeVore stared back at Gesell, a vague, almost lazy sense of distaste in his eyes.

‘Because I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

‘You lying bastard. You killed those two men. You must have. You were the only one outside the central committee who knew what they were doing. Only you knew how crucial they were to our plans.’

There was a movement behind Gesell.

‘Not the only one...’

Gesell turned. Mach had come in silently. He stood there, watching them. Ascher went across, confronting him, her anger, if anything, more pronounced than Gesell’s.

‘I say we kill him. He’s betrayed us. Spat on us.’

Mach shook his head. ‘He’s done nothing. Let him go.’

‘No!’
Gesell twisted DeVore’s collar tighter. ‘Emily’s right. We can’t trust him after this.’

Mach pushed past the woman. ‘For the gods’ sakes, let him go, Bent. Don’t you understand?
I
killed them.’

Gesell laughed uncertainly.
‘You?’

Mach took the knife from Gesell’s hand and sheathed it, then removed his hand from DeVore’s collar. Only then did he turn and look at DeVore, inclining his head slightly.

‘I apologize,
Shih
Turner. You must excuse my brother. He was not to know.’

‘Of course,’ DeVore stretched his neck slightly, loosening the muscles there.

Gesell rounded on Mach. ‘Well? What the hell’s been happening?’

‘I’m sorry, Bent. I had no time to warn you. Besides, I wasn’t sure. Not until I’d checked.’

‘Sure of what?’

‘They were Security. Both of them. They must have been sleepers. Records show they left Security five years back – a year before they joined us.’

A slight tightening about DeVore’s eyes was the only sign that he was interested, but none of the others in the room noticed it, or the way he rubbed at his wrist, as if relieving an itch there; they were watching Mach, horrified by this new development.

‘Security...’ Gesell hissed through his teeth. ‘Gods...’

‘There are others, too. Three more. In two separate cells.’

‘You made checks?’

Mach nodded. ‘I’m keeping tags on them. They’ll hear what happened. I want to see what they’ll do. Whether they’ll sit tight or run. If they run I want them. Alive, if possible. I want to find out what they’re up to.’

Ascher was shaking her head. ‘It doesn’t make sense. If they had their men inside our organization, why didn’t they act over Helmstadt?’

Mach glanced at DeVore, conscious of how much he was giving away simply by talking in front of him, but he’d had no choice. If Gesell had killed DeVore, they’d have been back to square one. Or worse: they might have found themselves in a tit-for-tat war with DeVore’s lieutenants. It was almost certain that the man had given orders to that effect before he’d come here at Gesell’s summons.

He turned, facing Ascher. ‘I thought of that. But that’s how it works sometimes. They’re ordered to sit tight until the thing’s big enough and ripe enough to be taken. They obviously thought that Helmstadt was worth sacrificing.’