An Officer but No Gentleman (15 page)

14

Jaxon approached the quarterdeck with apprehension.  He couldn’t remember apologizing for anything important in his life.  All that mattered to him was making things right with Charlie and if this was what it would take, he could eat some humble pie.  Jaxon found himself face to face with his brother before he formed his apology in his mind.

“Daniel, I’m here to apologize.  I shouldn’t have hit you or threatened to kill you.”

Daniel eyed Jaxon speculatively.  “Charlie put you up to that?”

“Aye,” he admitted,
chagrined.  “But I am sorry.  You’re not only my brother and first mate, but you’re also my best friend.  Shake my hand and forgive me.”

Daniel gripped his brother’s hand firmly.  “I know it was just the heat of the moment.  Aye, of course, I forgive you.”

Daniel released his hand.  “I hope you understand, I only expressed my concern about you and Charlie because I’m worried about you,” Daniel continued.  “And after talking to her today, I’m even more uneasy about how easily you could take advantage of her naivety.  She’s not like the girls we grew up with.”

“You still wear the black eye she gave you and you worry about her safety?”

“I’m nervous about her welfare not her safety.”

“Then let me put your mind to rest.  I intend to marry her when
we get home—if she’ll have me.”  Jaxon cast a hard look of defiance at his brother daring him to say anything.

Daniel shoved both hands into his hair and shook his head.  “You haven’t heard a word I’ve said,” he shouted
, but as a thought occurred to him he dropped his voice to a forced whisper.  “You plan to bed her!”

“I’m not going to deny it,” Jaxon said dryly the hint of a smile playing on his lips.  “There was a time when I could have had any woman I wanted.  Now women avoid me.  I’ve finally found one who
is not repulsed by my scars –I swear she doesn’t even see them when she looks at me—and I intend to keep her.”

Daniel threw his hands in the air in a gesture of frustration.  “Jaxon, listen to yourself.  That is
not
the basis for a good relationship.”

“Butt out of it, Daniel.  I came out here to apologize, not fight with you,” he said.  “Oh, speaking of apologies, Charlie heard your comment about frankincense and myrrh.  I think you need to make your own amends.”

“Aye-aye, Captain,” Daniel snapped, sarcastically.

“Stop being a jackass, Daniel.  Unless she rejects me, the woman in question will someday be your sister-by-marriage.  I thought you might not want her to think of you as a brutish lout.”

“I would think you wouldn’t want to marry a woman two of your brothers and a friend have seen nearly naked.  Won’t that make for an awkward holiday gathering?”

Jaxon leapt at Daniel, knocking him to the deck and pummeling Daniel’s face with his fists.  J
axon was so blinded by rage, after the fact, he had no idea which of the men had pulled him off.

“If you ever utter those words again, you son-of-a-bitch, they will be the last words you ever speak.”

Jaxon shook off the men holding his arms and stalked angrily back to his cabin, his limp aggravated by the long strides.

It ate at him,
they had seen her nearly completely nude and even more so that he had a part in her disrobing, but polite society would dictate something so distasteful would never be spoken of again.

“You have another patient,” he seethed slamming the door.

“What happened?”

“He crossed the line—a
nd this time he’ll do the apologizing.”

Charlie retrieved the doctor’s bag.  “Where is he?”

“Last time I saw him, he was laid out on the quarterdeck.”

“Damn it, Jax, you have to stop this nonsense.  I know you’re fighting because of me.  Maybe you should consider putting me off the ship and out of your life when we get to shore.”

He shot her an angry look.  “Is that what you want?”

She thought about it before answering.  Charlie moved up to him and put her arms around his waist, the doctor’s bag still in hand.  “No. I don’t understand why I’m so drawn to you
, but whatever this is; I don’t want it to end.” She reached up and ran her thumb along his lower lip. “After I thought about it,” she continued, “I was actually relieved I did not have to choose between you and my ship.  I know I would have chosen my ship out of duty and responsibility and I would have regretted that decision. I can’t say if this pull you have on me is real and long lasting, but I would hated to never experience it at all.”

“Kiss me, Charlie.”

She stretched towards him and gave him a passionate, but short kiss.  “I’ve got to go.  It’s too bad you couldn’t be civil.  I could have stayed here for a long time.”

“Charlie….”

“You have your kiss.  Drink your tea.”

Charlie found Daniel still on the quarterdeck.  He stood facing away from the crew.  She could see he held a cloth to his nose.

“I’ve come to help.”

“I don’t want or need your help,” Daniel said turning around.

“Oh, my.”

His lip and nose were bleeding.

“Why do you both have to go after my face?”

“Maybe because it’s so close to your caustic mouth,” Charlie said coolly, reaching in her bag for clean bandages that could be held to his wounds until the bleeding stopped.  “You really go for the throat when you attack.”

“I
don’t want to see him make a mistake he can’t undo.”

“You think I’m a mistake?” she asked handing him a thick bandage. He gave her a curt nod as he took it from her. It surprised her to find her feelings hurt by his admission.  Daniel didn’t even know her and yet he found her lacking.

“Maybe you should ask him about Millie Adams and how he became reliant on laudanum after she broke off their engagement.”

She had already realized he had a problem with the opiate in the past because of his reluctance to take it when she treated him.  “If he wants me to know, he’ll tell me.  I’m not going fishing with bait you provide,” Charlie stated.  “I don’t know if you think I have some ulterior motive
, but I assure you the last thing I want to do is hurt him.”

“How reassuring.”  Daniel dabbed at his face.  “As I said, your services are not needed.  Please vacate the quarterdeck.”

“Aye-aye.”

Jaxon surprised Charlie by being sound asleep in his bunk when she returned.  She hadn’t been gone long, so she knew he must have felt worse than he acknowledged.  The cup with the willow bark tea sat empty on his desk and she worried she may have made it too strong and it had put him to sleep.

She retrieved the doctor’s medical books and reread the paragraphs about willow bark tea.  It was quite specific about amounts
, but she didn’t have the scales she needed to weigh out her ingredient.

Charlie carried a chair to his bedside then scanned his bookshelves for something to read.  Rather than alphabetized, Jaxon kept his books grouped by subject matter. Nautical books were the largest group.  Next to that his Bible and a book by John Falvel called
Navigation Spiritualized; Or a New Compass for Seamen
.  The second largest section housed political books and pamphlets, mostly from the founding fathers.  Paine’s
Common Sense
, Hamilton’s
The Federalist Papers
, and Ben Franklin’s autobiography were a few that she recognized.  She could only find two works of fiction: 
Gulliver’s Travels
which she had read several times and
Robinson Crusoe
.

Since she had never read
Robinson Crusoe
it was the book she chose.  She curled up in the chair with her feet under her, but found the man in the bed drawing her attention over and over again.

She worried about him; worri
ed about the fever, worried she made his tea too strong.  She wanted to touch his forehead to test his temperature, but was afraid she’d wake him.  Eventually, she gave in and was alarmed at the heat radiating off his brow.  Charlie wet a cloth and laid it across his forehead.  She watched as he stirred slightly then settled back into deep sleep.

He was so handsome.  She didn’t understand why he would want to be
with her—after all she had been able to pass for a boy for so long, she doubted anyone but Morty, would call her pretty.  She wanted to touch the scar on his cheek.  It must have been terribly painful.  It was all she could do not to ask him where his scars came from.  But he was so touchy about them; she would wait until he was ready to tell her.  He probably wouldn’t like her looking at them now.  She wanted to kiss each one, make him forget the pain they caused.

When Charlie tried to read again, she realized how late it was getting.  The light through the portholes dimmed making the words difficult to see.  Charlie lit a lantern and left the cabin.  She went to galley where the medical cabinet was located
, for some more willow bark.  The cook was minutes away from having the evening meal prepared, but found time to help her with her preparation.   She made a quart’s worth this time and placed it in an earthen jug.

“Please have Vinnie bring the captain’s meal and mine to the captain’s cabin.   He’s not feeling well
, and I’d prefer to stay with him.”

“Aye-aye, ma’am.”

“I don’t suppose water bewitched is on the menu tonight?”  Charlie always found the tea sweetened with molasses easy on the stomach when she felt feverish.

“No, ma’am.”

Charlie didn’t know if she had the authority to request it. It was something she needed to discuss with Jaxon when he woke up.

“Thank you.”

Charlie carried the jug back to Jax’s cabin.  He still slept soundly and decided to wait until their meals arrived before rousing him.  It also gave the willow bark tea time to cool.  Charlie took a sip of the tea to see if it tasted the same as when Dr. Kirk made it for her when she was sick.  She made a face at its bitterness.  It was, as far as she could tell, the same.  She wondered if she boiled a lemon with it, some sugar or molasses if that might counter the bitterness.

Vinnie brought the meal a few minutes later.  “Come back for the dishes after the crew has finished eating.”

After the cabin boy left, Charlie sat down on the edge of the bunk.  She removed the wet cloth and gently shook Jaxon’s shoulder.  When he didn’t wake up, she pressed her lips to his.  He stirred, but didn’t open his eyes.  “Jaxon, it’s time to get up.  Your meal is getting cold.”  She pressed her lips to his again.

In the span of a second
, Jaxon Bloodworthy’s arms shot around her pulling her against him and off her feet.  A moment later he rolled, pinning her body under his.  Heat radiated off him.  She could feel it through his clothes.

Charlie laughed.  “Jax, stop it.  You’re delirious.”

“Not as delirious as we’re going to be in a few minutes.”

Charlie’s next giggle ceased when Jaxon’s mouth covered hers.  With his arms still around her, she could feel her back leaving the mattress as he pulled her tightly against himself.  Her stomach fluttered as his leg slipped between hers.  It would have been so easy to give in to Jaxon.  It was all she truly wanted at the moment.  But this was not the right time. 

She pushed against his chest.

“Stop,” she breathed.

“Why would I ever do that?”

“Three reasons.  First, you’re not well.  Second, the door’s not locked.  And lastly, Vinnie is coming back for the dishes in a few minutes.”

“Damn.”

Jaxon kissed her again before rolling away to the side.

“It’s late,” he said noticing for the first time the room was lit with a lantern.  “I thought you were going to join me for my nap.”

“You were sleeping so peacefully, I didn’t want to wake you.  Besides, your fever is up.  Did you drink
your tea or did you toss it? Don’t lie to me.”

“Out the porthole,” he admitted swinging his legs over the edge of the bunk.  “I don’t like taking anything.”

“Children drink willow tea.  It’s quite mild,” she said.  “And as your loblolly boy, uh girl, I am ordering you to drink it.”

He looked over his shoulder at her grinning.  “Are you?”

One didn’t give the ship’s master orders.  “Absolutely.  I want to see you get all your strength back.”

“Do you have plans for me and all my strength?” he queried, quirking an eyebrow at her devilishly.

“Maybe.”  The tone of the conversation made her nervous, in a delicious way. Her core twitched with longing for something indefinable to her inexperience.

Jaxon stood
and extended his hand to help her up.  When she was on her feet, Jax pulled her to him.

“Are you sure you want to get up and eat?  I can think of other things we could do.”  He ran his hand down her back to the swell of her bottom, giving it a little pat.

Surely, he did not know what he did to her when he touched her so intimately. She grabbed his hand and stepped out of his embrace. “Let’s belay those thoughts until you’re better, Captain.”