Anathema (Causal Enchantment, #1) (33 page)

I nodded. He averted his gaze to the floor
again.

“
Is there any chance that the portal
is out there in the woods?” Bishop asked.

I shrugged again. “Sofie doesn’t think so, but
I guess it wouldn’t hurt to search, right?”

“
We’ll have some of our pets check
things out,” Bishop agreed. “It wouldn’t take them long. It will
stretch our perimeter guard, but we should be okay.”

“
Okay, so what do we do in the
meantime?” Amelie asked.

I turned to Caden. “Can you take me to the
place where the Merth grows again?” I asked softly. “Sofie needs
it.”

“
Sure. Anything for Sofie.” The
sarcasm was impossible to miss. He disappeared down the tunnel,
carefully avoiding my eyes.

Sending Rachel away hadn’t changed anything, I
thought bitterly.

“
We can’t go in there. It’s too
painful for us weak little girls,” Amelie explained with an
apologetic smile. She and Fiona stood on the ledge by the
waterfall.

“
And you’ll have to pick it
yourself. Merth only has to touch us to make us flop like rag
dolls,” Bishop added, squeezing my shoulder.

“
That’s okay.” I smiled, glancing
over to see Caden approaching us. He had vanished for a brief time
while we were gathering the mountain bags and I was changing into
my wet suit.

He stopped in front of me. “Let’s get this over
with. I hate being near this wretched stuff.” He picked me up as he
had the other day. I buried my face in his chest again, only this
time the awkwardness was unbearable.

We were through the waterfall and standing
beside the sea of Merth in seconds. I looked up at Caden and
Bishop’s faces. As much as they tried to disguise it, they couldn’t
hide the pain in their eyes. They each trailed behind me with a
canvas bag, careful not to make contact with the swaying cords as I
hastily yanked the delicate strands of Merth and stuffed them in
the bags.

“
These are too pretty to pull out,”
I murmured.

“
Pretty enough to sedate an army of
vampires,” Bishop responded wryly.

There’re only three vampires I want to
sedate
, I thought as I worked. Funny; Sofie didn’t make that
list. Maybe I was crazy after all.

Both bags—the one I’d brought tonight and the
one from before—were filled in no time. There was still a sea of
silver growing. Enough to fill a hundred of these bags if I needed
to …

A shout from Bishop made me turn in time to see
Caden crumpling into a patch of Merth. I gasped, recalling his
description as I realized one of the strands had grazed his leg:
A thousand razors cutting into his flesh.
I ran to him and
grabbed hold of his arm, pulling with every ounce of strength I
had. Somehow I got him out.

Dropping to my knees, I cradled his head in my
lap. “Are you okay?” I asked, pleading.

His eyelids flickered open. He gazed up at
me.

“
Caden?”

Silence followed—seconds that felt like
hours—then I felt a hand on the back of my head. Caden pulled me
down to kiss me.

And then he abruptly broke off, murmuring,
“Sorry.” He was on his feet and moving away from me in a flash. “I
got caught up in the moment. I didn’t mean to do it.”

“
No, of course,” I said, scrambling
to my feet. I glanced around for Bishop. He had vanished. I looked
back to Caden, and my heart went cold. His jaw was taut, his full
lips pressed tightly together, and torture was alive in his eyes.
“It’s okay. I know! You just want to be friends. Go ahead! Say it!”
I fought tears but they escaped anyway. I furiously rubbed them
away.

Unexpected amusement flashed in his brilliant
green eyes. “You want me to lie to you?”

I
frowned, confused by his
answer.
Why would he be …

Caden suddenly appeared in front of me,
wrapping his arms around my body, pulling me toward him, his chin
resting on my head. “It’s been hell, waiting for you all week,” he
murmured, easing his grip enough that he could lean down and press
his forehead against mine. “I hated leaving things that way. I
wanted to explain …”

I couldn’t breathe, even when I consciously
reminded myself that I needed to. The Caden from before was back,
the Caden I didn’t ever want to be apart from again.
But what
did he mean?
“Can you explain now?” I heard myself ask,
grudgingly pulling far enough away to look up at him. “I mean, why
were you … like that earlier?”

Caden laughed. Cupping my face with his hands,
he sighed. “Because of you,” he said.

I stared hard at him, my brow furrowing. “I
don’t get it.”

He kept staring intensely at me. “That’s why
I’m with Rachel … because of you.” Caden chuckled. “You’re looking
at me like I have two heads again,” he murmured, pulling me close
to him, his sculpted chest against my cheek.

“
That makes no sense,” I mumbled,
genuinely confused.

“
Amelie was right. You are
oblivious.”

I scowled.

Caden exhaled noisily, pushing me away so I
could look into his eyes again. They searched my face, touching on
every detail, memorizing every line. “That first night you arrived
here, on Ratheus, I had just come back from New Shore for the first
time in hundreds of years. I was going to report Jethro for having
Merth. I’m no rat, but it was either that or start a war with him,
one that would surely cause death on both sides. I couldn’t risk
losing any of these three, especially my sister.

“
The Council hears grievances on
occasion, as their way of governing society—it’s a circus show,
really. Entertainment. Anyway, it was at the Council meeting that I
first met Rachel. They would have laughed me out of there, possibly
killed me, if she hadn’t spoken up, saying she would personally
investigate the matter. I believed her. Stupid, right? So I led her
back to that small cave we were in that first night.

“
It wasn’t until we were sitting in
our cave that she told me I was her soul mate and she had to have
me.” He shuddered. “The feelings weren’t mutual, believe me. I was
looking for a diplomatic way to let her down when Amelie showed up,
you in her arms. It all happened so fast. Rachel saw you and,
realizing what you were, demanded we take you back to the Council.
She’s ancient—I don’t even know how old—and therefore impossibly
strong. We could have fought her, maybe killed her, but one of us
would have died in the struggle. Or she could have escaped, running
back to the Council to tell them before we had the chance to catch
her. She’s even faster than Bishop, and he’s the fastest of
us.”

Caden paused to Rachel’s eyed narrowed push a
strand of hair away from my face. “So I did the only thing I could
think of to stop her. I pretended to love her and used that to my
advantage.” He shuddered again. “I convinced her that we needed to
hide you. It worked like a charm … except for one small problem,”
he murmured, softly running the back of his hand along my cheek.
“The only thing more deadly than a hungry vampire is a jealous
vampire. Rachel is a narcissist. She wouldn’t even consider the
idea that I’m deceiving her—that in truth I’m disgusted by her. But
she’s also terribly suspicious. If she even suspected for a second
that my thoughts and feelings were with someone else …”

I felt the nervous flutter in my stomach as I
heard him say those words but I quickly reprimanded myself, sure
that I was reading too much into it. He had to be talking about
someone else. I remained silent.

“
That night you were bitten … if she
had ever found out what had happened, she would have torn through
me to get to you.”

“
But you had no other choice,” I
said defensively.

He chuckled to himself. “I suppose not,” he
whispered, looking at me strangely. “That’s why I was so cold to
you today. It’s getting so much harder to pretend. I was afraid
she’d see right through me.” He pushed my hair away from my face
then, those gorgeous jade eyes gazing adoringly at me. “I knew …
the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew.” His hands slid down my arms
to twine his fingers with mine. He pulled my hands behind my back,
forcing me closer to him.

Butterflies the size of bats began madly
flapping around in my stomach, flying at warp speed.
Am I
imagining things?
I swallowed.
Is this impossibly
beautiful man telling me what I think he is?
“So that means
you’re not with Rachel, right? You don’t love her, after all,” I
whispered, needing to hear him say it.

“
No, not her. I don’t love her.” He
buried his face in my neck, inhaling deeply. “I thought you would
have figured it out by now. I promised myself I wouldn’t tell you
anything, for your sake. It’s safer to keep you in the dark, given
Rachel, with you being human, with you being from another world …”
he went on, naming all the obvious obstacles. “But that’s not
possible anymore,” he said, pulling away to gaze down at me again,
his face solemn, “with you attacking me that morning and
all.”

“
I didn’t attack you,” I stammered,
embarrassed.

The corners of Caden’s mouth twitched.
He’s
teasing
. “I don’t know what came over me,” I admitted
sheepishly.

“
And I thought you were reserved,”
he quipped.

We stood there, silently staring at each other.
The urge to lean forward and “attack” him again became unbearable.
But I wasn’t going to initiate it this time. So I stood there,
trembling in anticipation.

He let out a loud sigh and dropped my hands to
slowly back away from me. “I shouldn’t be doing this.” He dipped
his head to study the ground. When it lifted again, his face had
gone stony. “I meant what I said about you and I being impossible,
but I wanted you to understand why.”

My mind was reeling with the sudden change in
direction. “What … what does that mean?”

Caden heaved another resigned sigh and leaned
against the cave wall. “It means we continue doing what we’ve been
doing, pretending this conversation didn’t happen. That these
feelings don’t exist.”

“
Why? What do you mean? I can’t sit
around and watch you being pawed by that she–devil!” I said, my
eyes narrowed with incredulity. How could he even suggest such a
thing?

“
Don’t worry about me. I can handle
it.”

“
I bet,” I grumbled, suddenly
realizing that a beautiful seductress throwing herself at a guy,
willing to do God–knows–what, wasn’t exactly the worst punishment
in the world.

His eyes flickered with recognition at my
insinuation. “Hey, if you have a better idea, I’m all ears,” he
snapped. But he quickly apologized, adding, “The only way any of
that is bearable is because I’m imagining you.”

I felt myself blush furiously, a strange
sensation stirring within me. “So what now?”

“
Now we get out of this cave,” Caden
said softly, wincing.

It hit me then. “Merth!”

“
Yeah, it hurts.”

“
No! I mean, we can bind her in
it.”

“
No, ‘we’ can’t because ‘we’ can’t
touch it,” he explained patiently.

“
I can, though,” I began, but he was
already shaking his head furiously.

“
Not a chance. It’s too
dangerous.”

“
But I could—”

“
No!” Caden yelled, then clenched
his jaw tightly again.

I shrank back.

“
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. This
was what I was worried about—why I didn’t tell you how I felt in
the first place. It’s going to be hard enough to ignore each other.
I can’t be worrying about you pulling any insane stunts with her.
What you did today, lying to her like that—it was stupid.
Impressive, but stupid. She’s the most dangerous, wicked creature
you will ever face in your life, and I’d like that to be a long
life.”

My anger flared. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have
run off into the woods to pick flowers, and been so damn
flirtatious!” I snapped back at him.

He smirked. “I thought getting angry was
pointless.” That only infuriated me more. “I’ve never seen you
angry. It’s endearing.” He smiled adoringly at me. The smile only
lasted a second, though, fading as he stepped in closer to me. “I
know … I shouldn’t have. But I couldn’t help myself. I’m not much
better than any other vampire out there.”