Anchored (6 page)

“She may be in and out of consciousness during the night,” the doctor answered.

“What you’re saying is you don’t know what the outcome will be. That’s not good enough—I want answers.” Jonathan felt heat pour into his face and his lips stretched and tightened.

Dr. Peterson nodded. “I understand your frustration, Mr. Dawson. These are difficult times for you. I am sorry but there is nothing more I can tell you. The nurse will page me if there are any changes.”

Robert moved to Jonathan and placed his hand on his shoulder. “Come on, mate, they’ve done all they can. Cut the doc some slack.”

Jonathan shoved Robert’s hand away and moved to the window. He felt like he was in a vacuum and the ability to think, speak or feel had been sucked out of him. He stood as if frozen, and his face stiffened against the pain.

Chapter 9

Night became Mia’s friend. Closing her eyes on the feeling of helplessness gave her a brief respite. She turned and looked at the bedside clock and sighed, 6:00 a.m. Each day that her mother lived Mia clung to the hope that she’d come out of the coma.

Sitting up on her elbows, Mia braced herself. She felt clammy and slowly got out of bed.

How would she manage if her mother died? She’d watched her father unravel this last week. He’d bump into things as if he hadn’t seen them and often he seemed oblivious to her presence. Mia was surprised by her concern for him.

She showered, dressed and began the routine that helped her get through the day. Glancing at her watch, Mia saw it was 6:40 a.m. as she walked out the door. She missed her morning walks to work, but taking her car allowed her time to go up to the hospital during her lunch break.

As the children arrived at the preschool Mia watched for Jenny. The little girl called out to another child and skipped off as she went to play.

Mia smiled and spoke to a new boy who’d joined them yesterday. The morning went quickly and she was pleased she’d decided to keep working.

Going into the office she found Jackie on the phone. Mia packed her bag as she waited for Jackie’s conversation to end.

Jackie hung up the phone and swiveled her chair around to face her. “Are you off to the hospital now?”

“Yes, if that’s all right?”

“Why don’t you take the rest of the day off, spend some time with your Mum?” Jackie suggested.

“I know you think I should be sitting by Mum’s bedside all day, being the dutiful daughter, but I can’t—it kills me to see her like that.”

“I’m not saying that at all. I’m not telling you what to do.”

“You tell me what to do all day long. You’re my boss after all.” Mia knew she was being unreasonable but felt compelled to carry on. “I’m not a child and sometimes I feel you treat me like one.”

Jackie’s eyes widened. She moved toward Mia, reaching out her hand. “Mia, please—”

“Don’t touch me. I don’t want your sympathy. Mum’s not dead, she will come through this.”

Nodding, Jackie dropped her hand. “I’m not expecting you back today, but obviously it’s up to you.” Jackie turned and left the office.

Mia sank into her chair and felt distraught. Quickly she picked up a piece of paper and scribbled the word ‘sorry’.

She placed it on Jackie’s desk and left.

~~~

The room felt eerie. Mia looked around and took in the sterile environment. It seemed wrong as her mother loved color, music, noise. She pulled the chair closer to the bed and peered at her mother, hoping to see movement.

This couldn’t be happening. Mia sighed and began to shake her head. There was so much she wanted to say. She reached out and gently moved her fingers over her mother’s arm. It seemed surreal, like a dream she wanted to wake up from.

A film of tears flooded her eyes, causing Mia to sniff. She should have spent more time with her, been less aggressive.

Mia looked at her mother’s Bible and considered her uncle’s request that she read from it each time she visited. Glancing at her mother she picked up the Bible as if it would burn her. Holding it tightly in her hands Mia looked at the worn cover.

Her mother had taught her about God, yet Mia couldn’t let herself believe all the hype about God loving you, and Jesus dying for you. No way could she believe this. When had God ever lifted a finger to help her? She remembered asking him to help her over and over again, yet he hadn’t cared.

Mia touched her mother’s face and the skin felt soft, relaxed. Her mother always said that God hears your prayers.

Where are you now, God? Can’t you see Mum lying here? Don’t you care? It’s because of me, isn’t it? If I’d been a better daughter—I need to tell Mum I love her—Is that too much to ask?

Why did she even try? Picking up her mother’s hand she lightly squeezed it.

“Mum, it’s Mia. I don’t know if you can hear me but Uncle Robert thinks you can.” Her mouth tightened and she moistened her lips with her tongue. “There’s so much I want to say to you. I miss you. I know you’ll be disappointed in me but I don’t think I can stay living with dad. I’m sorry—”

Mia exhaled and slumped forward. Her fingers ruffled the pages of the Bible. She looked at the words and cleared her throat. Mia knew her mother would love to hear her reading the Bible. Softly she started to read, each word lifted up as a love offering to her mother.

“Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. “Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

~~~

Margaret’s eyes felt heavy, weighted down. She could hear Mia’s voice and tried to move. The pain was excruciating. She remembered the car and tried to grasp what had happened. A tear eased its way out of her eye.

She turned her head towards Mia and whispered her name.

Mia scrambled closer to the bed. “Mum, don’t move. I’ll get the doctor.”

“Don’t go.” Why was it hard to breathe? Her chest felt compressed by iron that tightened with each breath. Her head ached.

Mia leaned in.

Margaret closed her eyes.
Lord, I need to tell Mia I love her, help me.
She tried to smile as she opened her eyes and moved her fingers slightly.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you too, Mum. Let me get a nurse. You’re awake now, which is a good sign.” Mia began to rise as she spoke, her eyes locked on her mother’s face.

“Wait, please.” Margaret became silent for a moment and her eyes drooped.

Moments passed and Mia shifted in her seat.

Forcing her eyes open Margaret blinked. It took a tremendous effort to stay awake.

“Mia, you changed my world when I held you in my arms.” Her mind flashed to images of Mia as a baby and she smiled.

“Mum?” Mia whispered.

“I’m sorry. I was remembering.” Margaret’s fingers tightened on Mia’s. “I let you down. I pretended things were okay and you got hurt.”

“It’s okay, Mum, you did the best you could and I’m fine. It’s okay,” Mia soothed.

“No. You’re not fine. I see the pain in your eyes and—I’m sorry.” Margaret started to gasp.

Mia leaped to her feet, bent over her mother and scrambled to press the call button.

Margaret’s vision blurred as she looked at Mia as if through a soft mist. “I love you, I should have—” Taking short quick breaths Margaret forced herself to continue. “I wish I’d been stronger. Should have protected you.”

Margaret sensed that time was short as the air in the room seemed to evaporate. Struggling to speak she rasped. “Jesus can help you, reach out to him. Forgive me, honey, forgive your father. Forgiveness will heal you, set you free.” She smiled and a faraway look came into her eyes.

Margaret knew the words didn’t explain all she felt but they would be enough. She relaxed and the sound of Mia crying slowly lessened as she closed her eyes and reached out her heart and soul into the arms of God.

“No.” Mia whimpered. “No, please—oh God no—” Mia lay her head on her mother’s shoulder and tears racked her body.

Being her mother’s daughter had been the only thing that had been important to her. It gave meaning to her life.

She felt herself slipping into darkness and welcomed it, wanted to embrace it. She wanted to die, to go with her mother, to escape the pain that was crushing in on her heart.

Chapter
10

Throwing the pencil down in disgust David rose to his feet. With budget cuts at every angle his original design had all but disappeared. At this rate the skyscraper would become another building lost in a grey concrete jungle. How could he make changes without insulting the lines of the building? He’d have to go to Sydney to sort this out.

Moving to the window, he stood with arms folded across his chest and sighed. His gaze followed the rays of sunlight as they poked through the clouds and journeyed their way down to the ocean waves like a ladder from heaven. Now that was beauty. He smiled. God was the master creator.

Lord, that’s spectacular, thank you.
Give me your wisdom on how to pull this together without compromising my standards.

Peace replaced frustration. Blue Bay was good for him. He loved the salt air, the friendly people and the slower pace of life. It was so different from the life he’d lived in Sydney.

Bruno nudged David’s leg and he looked down, his hand idly scratched the big dog’s ear as his gaze returned to the window.

Bruno nudged him again.

His attention now fully on his dog, he squatted and placed both hands around Bruno’s head. “Okay, okay. What do you want?”

He saw the lead on the floor. “Arr – a walk is it? Sounds good to me, and maybe we’ll bump into the beautiful Mia.”

He felt better from the exercise and enjoyed Bruno’s frantic search for the Blue Tongue lizard that often sunned itself on the concrete step outside his house. Maybe he’d swing past Phil’s shop and pick up some cat food. He’d read somewhere that the large lizards would often steal food from the domestic animals.

David entered the store and saw Phil was in conversation with an elderly woman and it took David a minute to remember her name. He’d met Mrs. Spencer a few times now and she seemed like a nice woman.

He nodded to Phil and casually picked up a car magazine to leaf through while he waited. It was the sound of Mia’s name being mentioned that drew his attention to their conversation.

“Such a sad, sad day, poor Mia.” Mrs. Spencer touched a handkerchief to the corner of her eye.

“It still seems unbelievable that a thing like that can happen in Blue Bay.” Phil shook his head and David noticed Phil’s eyes had become watery.

“Yes I know. Never heard of a hit and run accident like that happening in these parts. Such a tragedy,” Phil added.

David’s face drained of color as he listened.

Mrs. Spencer turned and saw David. “I didn’t see you there, sorry if I’ve been holding you up.” 

“I’m in no hurry, Mrs. Spencer. I heard you mention Mia’s name. Are you talking about Mia Dawson?” David’s heart raced into overdrive. Had he lost Mia before they’d even had a chance to become friends? That would explain why he hadn’t seen her around or why she hadn’t returned his calls.

“Yes, poor girl. Her mother was hit by a car and the driver didn’t even take the time to stop and see if she was okay. Margaret died yesterday.” Mrs. Spencer waved the floral handkerchief around expressively.

David lowered his head to give himself time to regain control and consider the grief Mia must been feeling. “Have the police found out what happened?”

Phil coughed and came into the conversation. “I was talking to Robert earlier today—.”

 “David dear, Robert is Margaret’s brother,” Mrs. Spencer gave a watery smile and nodded. “Carry on, Phillip—you were saying?”

“Robert was saying there is no news on who was driving and no witnesses. The police will continue the investigation but it seems like it was a freak accident and the driver panicked and took off.”

David desperately wanted to go to Mia. Had she been able to resolve the fight with her mother before she died?

As neither Mrs. Spencer nor David said anything, Phil continued. “As you can imagine Robert is hurting bad, having been so close to Margaret. I asked him about the funeral and he said Jonathan had asked him to take care of all the arrangements as—”

Mrs. Spencer interrupted, looking over at David. “Jonathan is Mia’s father, David.”

“As I was saying,” Phillip’s eyebrows lifted and he squinted at Mrs. Spencer, “Robert is making all the arrangements for the funeral as Jonathan seems to be in a daze. Must be in shock, poor man.”

“How’s Mia?” David asked.

“Robert said he’d arrived at the hospital and found Mia clinging to her mother’s hand. Apparently little Mia looked up at him and said she didn’t want to leave because once she left the room things would never be the same again.” Phillip sniffed loudly and David noticed his hand shook as it leaned on the counter.

Mrs. Spencer needed to know all the details. She said there were casseroles to be cooked and dropped off to Jonathan and flowers to be organized. She would contact Robert as soon as she got home. “Phillip, did Robert say anything about when the funeral would be?”

“Yes, ten o’clock next Wednesday at the Clarence Street Bible Chapel.” Phil turned to David. “Robert and Margaret have been a part of that church since they were children.”

David asked if he could attend the funeral to show his respects to Mia’s mother even though he’d never met her.

Mrs. Spencer patted David’s arm. “Of course you can David; the whole town will probably turn up. It’s what we do around here, look out for each other. Now I have so much to do that I must be going. Thank you for the information about the funeral, Phillip, I’ll catch up with you in a day or two.” She hurried out of the store murmuring names of people she would contact.