And He Cooks Too (32 page)

Countryside disappeared. The vehicle slipped onto the heavily traveled thoroughfare that would take them into the city. He retrieved and raised the glass. “Here’s to you, Nick. And moving on.” He downed the rest of the drink in one slug and slumped back in his seat as the liquor scorched his throat.

****

The next morning, with only a slight headache reminding him of his trip back to town, Nick pulled himself out of bed, grabbed for his cell and began what he thought would be the first day of the rest of his life. Time to call his agent, Myra Donlevy. Get her actively seeking parts for him again. Reese and Jasper had sought greener pastures. Now it was his turn.

“Myra? Nick Coltrane. Got good news. I’m on the market again.”

“Nick, darling. What a coincidence you should call. Your name came up not more than five minutes ago.”

He set down the mug of coffee he’d poured before making his call. “Sounds promising. What’s the part?”

“Actually, it’s the part of Nick Coltrane. Seems like you’ve been recast.”

He pulled the phone closer to his ear. “Say that again.”

“You haven’t heard? I thought you were calling to do damage control.”

He sat forward. “Explain.”

“Check your computer.” She named a website for him. “As soon as possible.”

He cleared his throat. “What’s on there?” He considered all the possible videos of himself that could have found their way to the Internet and came up empty. He was usually a pretty discreet guy.

“I might have advised against it, had you consulted me, but now that it’s a done deal, you’re certainly getting attention. I didn’t know that female chef you added to your show was so funny. She’s sure nailed you, Nick.”

“Reese? What’s she got to do with this?” A tremor of fear nibbled at his insides. Reese had been pretty steamed at him when he’d gone to see her, but she wasn’t the vengeful type.

“You might want to take your phone off the hook today. The buzz is building, guy.” Chuckling, she hung up.

Time to review his contract with Myra. Some support she’d given him.

He went straight to his computer. Dead man walking.

The Internet video lasted less than five minutes. During the first few views, he sat riveted in front of the screen, like a rubber-necker unable to take his eyes off the scene of an accident. Then it began to sink in. Reese was parodying him. A couple more times through and he realized the extent to which he’d been made to look like a fool. On top of that, she’d come mighty close to revealing that he couldn’t cook.

His phone rang. Damn! He should have taken Myra’s advice more seriously.

Fortunately, or so it seemed at first, the caller was Leonie. “Thanks to a few so-called friends whose names I’ve now removed from my contact list, I have discovered a new website where anyone - any living person, no matter how depraved or despicable - can access videos supplied by anonymous moviemaker wannabes.”

A sharp pain sliced through his rib cage. Was this what a heart attack felt like? “You’ve, uh, seen the video?”

“Seen? I don’t believe I’d describe my viewing experience quite so civilly. More like…I’ve experienced extreme humiliation. All thanks to that woman. She couldn’t just leave, dragging her tail behind her. She had to send this public valentine.”

Ironic. A few days before, Leonie had been so victorious, having used her own Internet connections to humiliate Reese. Probably not the best time to remind her of that, though. “Yeah, well, who knew she had such a flair for comedy?”

“Comedy?” Her voice rose as high as her annual spa bill. “How can you treat this so casually, Nick? That little movie, or whatever they’re called these days, is mocking my show.”

Her show. Forget about his career. She certainly had. “It’ll blow over. Tomorrow, someone else will be making an Internet ass of herself.”

“But the damage this little movie is doing today is more negative publicity than we can afford. We’re so close to getting the nod from the network.”

The network. That intangible entity that had become his rival for Leonie’s attention.

He hung up. Should he go back to bed or commit himself to an institution? Word of mouth and electronic chitchat could make a national, hell, an international hero or fool out anyone or anything that tickled the cyber audience’s fancy. If that happened with Reese’s video, his days as a cooking show host were limited.

Back up a minute. Wasn’t that what he wanted? Not quite the way he’d planned to go about it, but as long as he could keep his acting career intact, it didn’t matter. He sank back into his couch cushions, savoring the realization. This was going to be easier than he thought.

****

The day after his initial visit to the Grandquist home, Jasper returned with a lengthy list of suggestions for overhauling the demo. He also carried a baker’s box that turned out to be homemade chocolate chip cookies he baked—yes, Jasper, the non-cook baked cookies—and was dressed in grungy blue jeans and a stained T-shirt that said “Wesleyan College.”

Reese scurried off to study Jasper’s comments while her mother claimed his attention to go over their contact list.

Twenty minutes later, Jasper and her mother sought her out. “Reese? We need to talk,” her mother said in a somewhat breathless though guarded voice.

Reese looked up from her notes on Jasper’s notes. “What’s up?”

The other two exchanged strange looks. “You tell her,” her mother said.

Jasper scratched his chin. “I’m not sure I know how to put this. I didn’t even know such a thing existed.”

“Yes?” Reese prompted, growing just a tad impatient.

“It seems, even before we’ve shopped your demo, you’ve already made a name for yourself.”

The first thought that occurred to her was that Leonie had talked to another reporter and totally ruined her name this time. “What? How?”

Jasper put away his cell phone, still shaking his head, amazed. “Apparently there’s a short video out on the Internet. It features you doing some kind of comedy shtick. It’s drawing a phenomenal number of hits as the word spreads.”

“Me?” She looked to her mother for clarification.

“Remember when we were taping how we all got out of sorts and you took it upon yourself to entertain us with, uh, your rendition of Nick Coltrane?”

Reese thought back a couple days. “Sure. But—” Then it hit her. “You don’t mean—”

Her mother nodded her head and watched Reese, as if waiting to see how she’d respond.

“But that was just me goofing around. I didn’t know Evan had taped it until afterward. How did it get on the Internet?”

It didn’t take long for her to find out. Evan and Charley, back from tennis, shot in from the garage, seeking refreshments.

“Oh, Evan?” she said more sweetly than she felt. “Do you know anything about a video of me being out on the Internet?”

“It was funny, Reese,” Evan protested. “How was I supposed to know when I sent it to my friends that it would wind up there?”

“Didn’t you say something like ‘for your eyes only’?” she asked, still incredulous that her seemingly innocent teenaged brother had leaked the video of her imitating Nick.

Evan exchanged a look with his older brother that said, “Doesn’t she know anything?”

Taking pity on his younger sibling, Charley attempted to play it down. “You’re the media darling for a day or so and then it will fade from memory. In the meantime, enjoy the publicity. Maybe it’ll make Mom and Jasper’s efforts easier.”

“Easier for what?” she asked, her voice rising. “To get me into a comedy club, maybe. Certainly not to sell a serious cooking show.”

She looked to Jasper. “Could I get sued for this? I wouldn’t put it past Leonie.”

Jasper pondered her question. “I don’t know. The publicity should only help
And He Cooks Too
.”

“At my expense!”

“You need to calm down while Jasper and I,” here her mother looked pointedly at her two sons, “and your brothers assess the damage. This video may be getting a lot of hits, but maybe those are limited to people the boys’ ages. People who’ll think it’s funny but nothing more.”

Charley sucked in his lips; Evan busied himself making a sandwich; Reese watched them attempt to distance themselves from their mother’s comment. What did they know?

Her first hint at what they weren’t saying came a few minutes later, when she checked her email and phone texts. Almost every fellow student in her culinary class had seen it and commented. She steeled herself to read them.

“Turn in your apron for a microphone.”

“Never thought that the class brain was also the class clown.”

“Loved the video. You’ve got to take this on the road.”

But that was her friends. What about the general public?

The answer to that came when Charley called down the stairs, “Go to that website, Reese. Check out the comments.”

She discovered a whole new world of information and entertainment when she logged onto the infamous website. She hadn’t actually seen the video until then. She sat back, amazed at the contrast between it and the demo. She was a different person. Funny. Relaxed. Approachable. But it was the comments that had come in about the video from the general public that blew her away.

“Never seen this guy before, but you can bet I’m going to check out his show now.”

“What a funny gal.”

“A chef who can make me laugh. Love it!”

“Not as bad as you thought it’d be, right?” Evan asked hopefully as he settled in the chair across from her.

“So far. At least from the comments. But how well do they represent everyone else who’s viewed it?”

Jasper and her mother had also viewed the video by now. “It’s not half bad, Reese.” Jasper told her.

Reluctantly, she admitted, “Better than the demo, you mean. I think so too.”

“Where are those notes I gave you, Reese?” Jasper asked. “I want to see how well that video addresses some of my concerns.” He turned to Evan, “Then we use those conclusions to rethink her demo.”

Evan’s face lit up. “Exactly what I was thinking, Bro.”

They high-fived over the table while Reese watched in disbelief.

Jasper’s cell phone rang. He excused himself and left the room while Reese and the rest of them continued to debate the merits and drawbacks of the Internet piece. He returned a few minutes later, a very strange expression on his face, something between bewilderment and shock. “You won’t believe this. That call was from the very same network Leonie has been pining after. They want to talk to you next week, Reese.”

“About my show?”

“Guess they’ve got some young producers on their staff who spend a lot of time harvesting the Internet—their phrase, I thought you harvested corn—for fresh ideas. They picked up on your video and brought it to the attention of the senior staff.”

Although Reese heard his words, they didn’t really sink in. She stared at the infamous website on her computer screen, oblivious to the ground swell of excitement building around her. The network had seen a few minutes of an impromptu video and was now interested in talking to her? It didn’t make sense, the same way that she couldn’t feel either of her hands although they were folded in front of her. Nothing seemed real.

This was crazy. Overnight, she’d become an Internet star.

She tried to speak, but her mouth was dry.

“Reese? Say something,” her mother prodded. “You’re not in shock, are you?” She turned to her sons. “Is she in shock? How are you supposed to tell when someone’s in shock? Should I call a doctor? Find a thermometer?”

“Here, Mom,” Charley said calmly, leading her to a chair. “You might be suffering from shock yourself. I’ll get you another bottle of water.”

“No! No more of that stuff,” she protested. “I’m already floating.”

Gradually, as she returned to reality, questions sprang to Reese’s mind. “Did they say why they want to see me, Jasper? Maybe it’s to warn me against impersonating their future star.”

Jasper held up a hand. “Slow down. They said they’d seen your video and were intrigued enough to go check out
And He Cooks Too.
They want to see you to discuss, and I quote, ‘a potential future association,’ end quote.”

Charley raised his water bottle in a toast. “I’d say you got their attention, Sis. You’re on your way.”

She fretted. “They haven’t seen my demo yet. How do I know they’ll like my show?”

“Reese, my dear,” Jasper said, “what is it you kids say, ‘don’t sweat the small stuff.’” He helped himself to a cookie. “Let’s worry about that later. Don’t know if we’ll have time to redo the demo, but we can get a decent treatment together by then.”

How could he eat at a time like this? Her own stomach was doing calisthenics.

“Just one thing,” Jasper got out between bites. “You may be competing with
And He Cooks Too.
What I didn’t mention about Leonie co-hosting was that she only decided to do that when the network, the same one that just contacted me about you, indicated interest in the show because of you and Nick.”

“Will we have to see them?” she asked.

Jasper furrowed his brow. “Don’t know. Probably not.”

She allowed herself the pleasure of a half smirk. “Good. Thanks for the warning.” As her blood pulsed faster, her competitive spirit revived. If the network picked her show, it would be a double victory—she’d get her program on the air sooner than anticipated and she’d knock
And He Cooks Too
out of the running. A fitting end to her experience with Nick Coltrane.

Chapter Twenty-Three

“Are you the guy Reese Dunbar is impersonating on her video?” the reporter on the phone asked.

“You’ll have to check with her,” Nick replied, the words Leonie and Myra, both now serving as his
handlers
, had told him to use. “Personally, I don’t see any resemblance.”

“Really? Others do,” the cheeky caller ventured.

“That’s their prerogative, although I suggest they tune in to our show and check out the real thing.” He went on to provide program details, nearly gagging at the effort.