And Playing the Role of Herself... (14 page)

She raised my face to hers with gentle fingers under my chin and smiled softly. "I may have been a pig, Caid, but in the few relationships I've had, I've always been a monogamous pig. I'm glad you said something, because I want - and expect - the same thing."
"You do?" I asked, the smile growing on my face.
She leaned forward and kissed me gently. "I do."
"Sweet." I said without thinking.
"Sweet?" She looked at me with a quizzical smile.
I laughed and shook my head wryly. "God, too much time with my brother and his friend this week. Smack me if I say 'dude' or 'awesome.' Or 'check it.' Really smack me if I say 'check it.'" She laughed and leaned back on her hands, smiling at me, her eyes warm with affection. The "Robyn Rush" took me by surprise, and I acted on impulse, pushing her back on the bed and crawling on top of her, kissing her intensely.
She let out a muffled huff of surprise but responded immediately, opening her mouth to deepen the kiss and pushing my shirt up roughly to run her hands up and down my back. Her fingernails scratched up my spine, not lightly, and I arched against her with a gasp.
"God…" I pulled my mouth away from hers to breathe, just as a knock sounded at the door. Both of us froze for several moments, staring at each other. I rolled to the side, flopping heavily on my back and staring at the ceiling. "Goddamn." Whether I meant it as a curse for the person at the door, or an expression of amazement at how Robyn affected me, I wasn't sure.
"Jesus Christ, Caid…where did that come from?" Robyn asked shakily, laying an arm over her eyes.
I rolled my head to the side to look at her, answering honestly, "I have no idea."
She smiled and grasped my hand, squeezing gently. "Well, feel free to do that again, anytime."
"Anytime?" I grinned.
"Within reason, Miss Harris," she answered dryly. "For instance, now is not a good time, so you should stop looking at me that way."
There was another knock, and Perry's muffled voice came through the door. "Yo, Caid. Wake up!" More knocking followed.
Robyn raised an eyebrow. I sighed and sat up. "My brother," I explained as I stood, reaching down to grasp her hand and pull her to her feet.
She nodded and ran a hand through her hair, looking around the room. "Do you have a brush or something?"
"In the bathroom," I said over my shoulder as I walked to the door. Perry knocked again, harder this time. "I'm up, I'm up!" I said loudly, and pulled the door open, catching Perry in mid-knock. "Jeez, Per, I'm up already."
"Took you long enough," he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. His hair was still wet from a shower, and he had what looked like a small nick from a razor on his jaw.
I leaned against the door. "Have a little trouble with the razor this morning, Periwinkle?"
He scowled and pushed past me but stopped dead at the sight of Robyn coming out of the bathroom with a baseball cap in her hands.
"Can I borrow this?" she asked me, and smiled at Perry.
"Holy shit," Perry said.
I'd had similar reactions on several occasions, so I could sympathize.
"Perry," I pushed the door shut and stepped around him, resisting the urge to go over to Robyn and slip my arm around her. "Close your mouth and don't stare. This is Robyn. Robyn, my brother Perry."
Robyn put the hat on her head, tucked her hair behind her ears, and stepped forward, extending a hand. "Perry, nice to meet you."
He took her hand absently, staring at her despite my warning. "You're Robyn Ward."
She laughed lightly and allowed him to continue shaking her hand. "That I am."
"Jesus, Perry," I said in exasperation, "would you quit staring?" My sympathy with his reaction was waning.
He dropped her hand immediately, and looked over at me with a scowl. "I wasn't staring."
"Were too."
"Was not."
"Were too."
Robyn's laughter stopped the argument before Perry and I could make complete idiots of ourselves, and I glanced over at her sheepishly. "Sorry," I mumbled.
She just smiled. "I've got three sisters, I've been there." She glanced at her watch and looked over at me apologetically. "I should get to my room…I have a change of clothes, and I should take a shower…"
Still humming with tension from our earlier activities, my brain had no trouble immediately picturing Robyn naked in the shower and I felt my pulse speed up. Some of what I was thinking must have been plain on my face, because a slow smile spread across Robyn's face. "Within reason, Miss Harris, within reason," she murmured as she walked past me and patted my stomach.
She stooped to pick up her bag at the door. "I guess I'll see you both downstairs…" She looked at her watch and raised her eyebrows. "And we'd all better hurry. Liz would hate for any of us to be later than she is." With a final smile and a lingering glance at me, she left, the door closing slowly after her.
I couldn't have stopped my smile, even if I'd wanted to.
Hot damn. What a great way to start the day.
"Damn." Perry's awed voice drew my gaze. He was staring, much as I'd been, at the door that Robyn had just left through, and now he shook his head and said again, "Damn. I heard you and Liz last night talking about a Robyn, but I had no idea…" He backhanded me on the arm. "You didn't tell me you were friends with Robyn Ward," he accused with a miffed expression on his face.
"Hey Perry," I feinted towards his face with my hand and poked him in the stomach when he raised his arm to cover his face. "I'm friends with Robyn Ward. Now get the hell out of here so I can take a shower."
"Ha-ha." He eyed me suspiciously as he sidestepped towards the door, guarding his stomach. "Jeez, I just about hit the floor when I saw her in here." He frowned. "What was she doing in here, anyway?"
I was tempted to tell him everything. Frankly, I had the urge to run up and down the halls, pounding on doors and letting everyone know that Robyn Ward liked me. Thirty-four years old and I wanted to turn cartwheels and tell everyone my secrets…Sheesh.
I realized, though, that until Robyn and I talked about how open we were going to be about this, I probably shouldn't go blathering on about how Robyn and I had just been rolling around on the bed, making out like teenagers. The thought stopped me for a second - I'd never had to worry about that before.
"Borrowing a hat," I said casually and herded him towards the door, feeling a twinge of guilt about the semi-truth. "Now go, I'll see you downstairs. And you might want to warn James…I don't want his head to explode."
Perry was laughing as the door closed behind him.
##
Breakfast was an interesting affair, with lurking photographers, overly solicitous wait staff, eager autograph seekers and a visit from several police officers under the guise of updating me on the investigation into my stolen car, but what was more likely an attempt to see Liz and Robyn in the flesh. In addition to that, Liz's flirted outrageously with my younger brother and James continued to cast puppy-dog like, adoring looks at me despite the presence of Robyn and Liz; two much more worthy targets, in my opinion.
Like I said, breakfast was an interesting affair.
I was also a little bothered by Robyn's ability to act as though we were nothing more than friends, and not particularly close friends at that. I know she'd had more practice than me in this area, but I didn't know how she was able to act so normal when all through breakfast I was fighting the nearly overwhelming desire to leap across the table and tear her clothes off.
I escaped back to my room after breakfast with relief, gathering my things and zipping the last of my toiletries into various pockets of my pack when someone knocked on the door.
"Yeah, Perry, I'm almost rea…dy"
Robyn leaned against the doorframe, dangling my baseball cap on a slender finger. "I came to return this." She shrugged off the wall and stepped towards me, pushing me back into the room and tossing the cap on the bed behind us. She kicked the door closed with her foot, slid a hand around the back of my neck, and pulled me into heated kiss that left me gasping.
"God." She broke the kiss and wrapped long arms around me. "That's all I've wanted to do for the last hour."
I ran my hands up and down her back gently and kissed the side of her head. "Glad it's not just me."
She chuckled. "No, it's definitely not just you."
We stood for a minute, holding each other, and then I pulled back, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "This is a little strange for me…I'm not sure how to act," I admitted. "I don't know who I should tell, who I shouldn't tell…"
"I know, Caid." She sighed. "I'm sorry. Don't take this the wrong way, okay?" I nodded cautiously. "I think we should wait and see where this goes before we start telling people about it. And not," she interrupted as I started to say something, "not because of the gay thing. Although honestly, Caid, in our business, we do need to be careful. But right now, this is about you and me, Caid. No one else. I don't want to jinx this, and honestly, I'd like to have you to myself for at least a little while. Do you understand?"
I nodded slowly, thinking about what she said. What she was asking for wasn't unreasonable; it actually made a lot of sense. This was going to be complicated enough without getting other people involved - maybe we should take the time to figure out what there was between us before telling people.
"Caid…" Robyn moved away from me smoothly as Perry knocked and pushed open the door that we hadn't quite shut. "Are you ready?" He stopped and smiled at Robyn. "Oh. Hi."
She smiled back, and walked to the door. "Thanks for the hat, Caid. See you downstairs."
"Yeah," I said, watching her go. "See you."
##
Perry, James and I stood next to the limo as Liz's driver Walter pulled Robyn's overnight bag from the trunk and started up her driveway.
"That's okay, Walter, I've got it." Robyn stopped him with a hand on his arm. He looked at her uncertainly, and she stepped over and took the bag, slinging it over her shoulder with a smile at the older man. "Thank you, Walter."
"Of course, Miss Ward." He nodded, and walked around the car and slipped into the driver's seat.
The three-hour drive back from Big Bear had been uneventful, but slower than expected due to unusually heavy Sunday morning traffic. Liz had spent most of trip on the phone to various people, Paula had worked on her laptop, Robyn had conversed easily with Perry and James, and I had made a few phone calls and tried not to think about how goddamned sexy Robyn's voice was, or how good it had felt to wake up with her that morning.
Robyn turned to face the three of us. "James, Perry," she held out a hand to each, smiling. "It was good meeting the two of you. Try to take it easy on Caid here for the next few days, hmm?"
James blushed and Perry grinned rather stupidly and said, "It was nice meeting you too, Mi…Robyn. And don't worry. Caid's still pretty spry for her advanced age. I think she'll be able to keep up with us." He quickly jumped back to avoid the swipe I'd taken at his stomach and ducked into the limo. James followed him with a grin.
"Little shit head," I mumbled and shook my head.
Robyn laughed lightly and adjusted the bag on her arm, looking up towards the house. I looked down at the driveway, following a tiny crack in the cement with my eyes, and finally looked up to find she had turned her attention on me. She tipped her head towards the house. "Walk me up?"
I nodded and we walked together up her drive and onto her porch, neither of us speaking. I didn't know where to go from here, where we stood, or what to expect. We'd expressed an attraction and interest in each other, but now what? Did I ask her out? Did we date? Were we girlfriends? Wasn't there some joke about a lesbians and dating and U-Hauls?
We stopped at her front door and she reached inside her purse and pulled out a set of keys. She fit the key in the lock and paused, not looking at me. "I leave on Wednesday. For two months." She opened the door and ducked inside to turn off the alarm and drop her bag, then stood in the doorway, watching for my reaction.
The Lynne Wesson movie. I'd forgotten all about it.
Shit
. "Two months?"
She nodded. "The shooting schedule is going to be crazy, and I'm really going to need to immerse myself into character and try and avoid distractions…" She fidgeted with the doorknob a bit and crossed her arms across her chest. "Listen, Caid. What I'm trying to say, and doing a bad job of, is that I'm not going to be able to communicate much for the next two months. I know we just…started something here, but maybe it would be a good idea for us to put this on hold until I get back."
Put this on hold? Was she freaking kidding me?
I put my hands on my hips. "Are you're going to change your mind in two months? Have you changed your mind already? Is that what this is? A graceful way of backing away again?"
"No, Caid. God no. Of course not," she said, obviously startled by my anger. "I just…"
"Ah." I suddenly realized what the problem might be.
She frowned. "What does 'ah' mean?"
"It means I think I know why you're doing this. You're not going to change your mind, but you think I will. You still don't trust that this isn't just some fad for me, do you?"
"No, that's not it, either." She uncrossed her arms to run a hand through her hair. "I'm not going to lie to you, Caid. Yes, I'm scared that once we get involved, you'll decide that it's not for you, and I'll end up hurt. I told you, though; I think it's worth the risk. What I'm talking about now has nothing to do with that." She sighed. "Look. I don't want to mess this up. I know this is new for you, and I don't want us to feel rushed because I'm leaving, and maybe we do something you're not ready for…"
She was doing this because of me. She was concerned about me. I smiled, and stepped towards her. "Back up."
"Wha…"
"Robyn, back up. Into the house. I want to kiss you, and I don't think you want Liz or your neighbors to see that quite yet. And I don't want to give Perry and James a cheap thrill."
She took two quick steps back, then another two to her left, so that she was out of the doorway. I followed her into the foyer and closed the door partway behind us before stepping in close and putting my hands on her waist.
"Robyn." I kissed her gently. "I've been putting how I feel about you on hold for almost two years. I'm tired of it, and I really don't see the point. I appreciate your concern, but I'm a big girl, and I'm not going to get rushed into something I don't want, or something I'm not ready for." I kissed her again, wanting much more but keeping it light, mindful of the car full of people waiting for me outside.