Annie's Truth (Touch of Grace) (31 page)

“Just like living in a small town, isn’t it? Only we don’t have beauty parlors or gossip magazines.”

He felt the burn in his chest and spoke before he should. “You don’t care anything about Annie. You just want to play games with Hanna.”

David rocked on his heels and looked away.

John took two long strides and stood tall, making his height advantage noticeable. “I want to know what you’re up to.”

“Whoa, whoa!” David held up his hands. “Calm down.”

John didn’t budge.

“Okay. All right. I’m tired of Hanna chasing after you. It’s embarrassing.”

He took a step back. “Maybe you should have thought about that when she was pursuing you. You gave other girls the same attention.”

“Jah, well, I’m not ready for what she wants.”

“Then tell her.” John snapped his suspenders, pleased he’d put David in his place.

“You mean like you’re doing?”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Why are you with Hanna now that Annie’s back?”

John didn’t like the question and got in his face again. “Annie has a lot to work out before she can think about us.”

“She needs you. And you’re with Hanna.”

That shot a jolt through him. “She needs time. And Hanna’s with me, not the other way around.” John stepped past David, the convicting words building.

“Are you sure about that?” David snapped
his
suspenders and walked inside.

 
Chapter Thirty-Three
 

A
CH
, A
NNIE
…” A
LMA’S
normally loud voice was tender, causing Annie to move closer. She held a blanket out for Alma to lay the tiny baby on. As she did, Annie saw why Alma’s eyes misted, eyes that always remained dry.

Small, twisted legs lay limp in the warm blanket that had been heated by the fire. His cry made them smile as they met eyes. “He’s a gift,” Annie whispered.

The exhausted mamm watched them silently. “What is it?”

Alma went to her and clasped her hand. “Your child is special, Ellie.”

Ellie put a hand to her lips as Annie placed the tiny bundle on her chest. “Ach.” She touched his arms and chest and then his tangled legs. She caressed the small limbs as if to bring life back into them that had been lost.

The family gathered around her and the little one. Ervin lifted the blanket to see where Ellie’s focus was. The children gazed at the withered legs and made cooing noises, ahhs, and soft prayers. Some laid hands on the babe. Others stroked him.

This was why Annie loved these people, this community. Unlike the outside world, they looked upon this as a blessing, an opportunity to minister to one of Gott’s meek children. No hospitals or doctors could replace the insurance of brotherly love between them. It was the same with the elderly or sick—a chance to give, as all are called to do.

Alma and Annie busied themselves by cleaning up so they could to leave the family to bond with the child. Little Ana watched them intently and made her way over to Alma.

“I remember them, Alma.” Ana always spoke slowly and quietly, and now even more so.

Alma clapped her hands and gave Ana her full attention. Child-rearing rules were part of Alma’s work. She encouraged the children to know what was expected of them so they would make their parents proud. Ana grinned. “Do you want to hear them?”

Alma nodded and spoke to little Ana as if she were her own daughter. “Attitudes are caught…”

Ana’s shy voice could barley be heard. “Not taught.”

“Always tell the…” Alma bent over so she could hear the small child.

“Truth.” Ana gave her a smile, gaining confidence with each correct answer.

“Never question those in…”

“Author-ty.” Ana rocked back on her heels.

“Be sure the cup is half full.”

“Be cheerful.” Ana smiled.

“Always help…”

“Those less fortun…” Ana’s dark brown hair slid back and forth across her back as she moved her head.

“…nate.
Fortunate.
Good, that’s a hard word.” Alma smiled a mamm’s smile. “And the last one…Don’t…”

“Gossip.” Ana shut her eyes and beamed a smile.

“Well done, Ana.” Annie patted Ana’s head and watched her walk away with pride in her step. She turned to Alma. “You forgot one.”

“‘Don’t remove the twinkle in their eye’—should be for adults, in my opinion.”

And Alma always did have an opinion. Annie nodded in agreement. “I never thought of it that way.”

They left the house with the satisfaction they’d helped twins enter into the world. The first had come slowly, but the second was almost right upon the first—two boys, to their daed’s delight.

“After five girls, that’s a nice sight to see,” he had told Annie.

“You could do this alone, Annie.” Alma’s rosy face took on a serious expression as she marched to her buggy. “You delivered that second one so quick I didn’t see it happen.”

“You were busy with the first.” Annie knew better than to get sucked in to what Alma was referring to. No one could do what Alma did the way she did it. “And I’ve learned from the best.”

Alma lifted one side of her mouth in response and shoved her medical bag into the back of the buggy. It creaked with the weight of the old leather handbag, full of everything, much more than Alma needed.

They pulled up to the chicken coop, where the proud daed stood with twice the eggs he’d promised. “Considering they were twins,” he explained as he handed one basket to Annie and the other to Alma. They carried their compensation to the buggy and wedged the baskets in next to the bag to keep them from shifting. There would be more eggs in the coming days. Alma needed the payments more than Annie because she was busier with her work, but Mamm always appreciated any extra food for the family.

Once Alma got situated, she fell silent for a moment before speaking her mind. “What are you going to do, Annie?”

Annie stepped into the buggy and paused before she sat down. She knew what Alma was asking and didn’t like the answer. She thought constantly of her birth mother, trying to decide whether it was right for her to pursue a relationship with her or whether it was impossible. Yet a small voice inside her yearned to know more about this woman who had braved so much and received her so openly, unlike the reception she had received upon her return home. “It seems I don’t have the luxury to decide.”

Alma picked up the reins and stared at Annie. “Of course you do.”

Annie sighed in frustration. “Then when will the stares stop?”

Alma grunted. “When you quit looking.”

Something Alma could do and Annie should learn to. Annie wrinkled her forehead. “Do you think it would work?”

“Without a response, there isn’t much encouragement to continue.”

“I never thought people would react this way. They didn’t before. Why now?”

“It was there, although I have to say your generation has made it worse.”

“Why is that?”

“They experience more of the world than we did. And the world has more to experience.”

Annie looked over at Alma. “Why is it everything you say makes sense?”

“I don’t know that it does. I just keep things simple.”

“Maybe I should do more of that.” Annie thought about how her secret continued to haunt her. She could not accept the thought of being a rapist’s daughter, and if she couldn’t accept it, how could others? She had kept the circumstances of her conception a secret, but her parents had kept her identity a secret as well. How could one be right and not the other? There was nothing simple about it.

“What’s on your mind?” Alma slapped the horse’s hide, increasing the
click, click
of the horse’s steel shoes.

“Everything. What I’ve done, if it was worth it, how to get on with life, how to change it.”

“What’s done is done. You move on by making a choice and setting it into motion. Then things change on their own.” She looked at Annie out of the corner of her eye. “What about John?”

Annie felt a shot of loneliness at the sound of his name. “I haven’t seen him since singing on Sunday.”

“Probably ’cause of those stories David’s been telling.”

Annie looked over at Alma. “What stories?”

“Nothing I believe, but those kids who go to those
rumspringas
sure do love to tell a tale. Something about a ride in his buggy the other night.”

Annie believed Alma. She made her way around the community delivering babies, gaining more information than she cared to hear. “I did take a ride with David.”

Alma turned toward her. “So it’s true?”

“Hanna was pulling one of her tricks, so David and I decided to find our own way home.”

Alma pursed her lips and leaned her head slightly. “Sounds like John believes it. Maybe he should hear from you.”

Annie looked out over the brown earth and barren trees, much like she felt since she’d come home, dark and hollow inside. “I don’t know if he still wants me…us.”

“He just doesn’t know what to do with you. You up and leave him, then come back silent as a mouse.” She steered the horses around a bend in the dirt road. They both leaned left with the turn. “I say it’s about time you told somebody something about what happened to you while you were gone.”

Annie sat stiff on the wooden bench, which gave no comfort to the ache in her back. “If it was good, I would have shared what I learned.”

Alma was abnormally quiet for a couple of minutes. “Even more of a reason to tell someone you trust.”

 
Chapter Thirty-Four
 

A
T DAYBREAK
J
OHN
headed for the eastern edge of the valley. His black horse, Rob, kicked up dirt as John urged him into a lope. The morning was new and crisp, perfect for a ride before more chores needed to be done.

John slowed his horse at the sound of another set of hooves pounding behind him. As soon as Otto’s hooves hit the first field, John knew Annie was there. He pulled back the reins and let Rob settle down while he waited for her.

A dark blue coat, far too large, was gathered onto the horse’s bare back in front of her, covering her dress. Her kapp was held loosely with a few pins that barely held it in place. John guessed it was Eli’s boots she’d rushed off with, because they came up to her knees.