Aperture on the East (10 page)

“
Care to share the funny
story?” said Ana as she set down the plates.

“
It’s just something
silly,” said Vo.

“
On that note,” said
McKenzie, “I do have to ask you a silly question, Ana.”

“
Go ahead.”

“
You see, my ex-girlfriend
announced her engagement to this guy that she just barely met, and
she posted their photos all over the Internet. I wonder, Ana, if
you would agree to pose for a few photos with me and just pretend
to be my new girlfriend. I just want to show her that I am not as
sorry as she thinks I am.”

Ana didn’t immediately answer. Vo
raised his eyebrow, feeling dumbfounded by the request.

“
I know. It’s really
silly,” said McKenzie. “It’s just that we have the same friends and
I don’t want to look like a loser. I’ll understand if you don’t
want to do it, but you are the only lady I know here.”

“
It’s fine. I can do it,”
said Ana. “Do you have a camera?”

McKenzie produced his cell phone, and
handed it over to Vo. “Do you mind?”

Vo reluctantly took over the cell
phone and started photographing Ana and McKenzie as they posed as a
couple engaged in various positions of embrace. Ana even sat on
McKenzie’s lap and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“
Okay, I think that’s
enough.” Vo handed the cell phone back to McKenzie, and Ana got up
from McKenzie’s lap.

“
I need to get back to
work,” said Ana as she started to turn away.

“
Wait, Ana,” said
McKenzie. “Actually, I also wanted to ask you if you are free
tomorrow morning to have breakfast with me at the Sunrise Coffee
House.”

Ana stopped and looked at Vo, and then
she looked at McKenzie and said, “Yes, I’d love to.”

They decided on a time to meet before
Ana went to help the other customers. Vo and McKenzie ate quietly
for a while. Vo had lost the cheerful spirit that he had come into
the restaurant with, and was not in the mood for chatting. McKenzie
finally broke the silence.

“
I like Ana,” said
McKenzie. “I actually would be thrilled if she were my girlfriend
for real.”

“
You haven’t known her
that long, yet,” said Vo.

“
I am attracted to her.
Did you know she used to be in a punk rock band? She was into the
riot grrrl stuff, can you believe it? She played a cassette tape
for me the other day, music her band made back in the nineties. She
played the rhythm guitar, and she got this raw and powerful voice.
Almost made me wish I was in her band, too.”

“
You’ve been spending a
lot of time together?”

“
We’ve hung out a few
times. She’s a little mysterious, won’t say much about her past
really, except that she is single with two kids.”

McKenzie paused to take a
sip of his coffee, and then continued to say, “She kept her
apartment spotless, everything in its place. The décor was simple
and elegant. And her photographs are amazing. I saw the portraits
hanging on the walls of her bedroom; each of them seems to be
telling a different story. And there are these
seascapes
—”

“
You were in her bedroom?”
Vo swallowed hard.

“
She just took me there to
show me her photographs. Her landlady didn’t want her to hang them
in the living room. I don’t see why not. They are masterpieces. As
I was saying, the seascapes are spiritual, and I feel almost
enlightened whenever I see them.”

Vo didn’t say anything for the rest of
the meal. McKenzie made a few more comments about his life but Vo
didn’t pay any attention. They finished their meal and gave Ana a
big tip before they left. McKenzie went to walk on the beach, with
the intention to visit the bar at the Sailing Club later. Vo turned
down the invitation, and got on his motorcycle. The food was
excellent, but instead of satisfaction, Vo felt disappointment. He
fought the urge to go back in the restaurant. Ana seemed to be
quite taken with McKenzie, and that was
that.  

When Vo returned to his apartment, he
heard water flowing and dishes clanking in the kitchen.

“
Hey, Vo,” said Vidal. He
was cleaning and putting away the dishes.

Vo grabbed a cold bottle of water from
the refrigerator. He looked at the dish rack full of wet plates,
bowls and utensils. “Was Kim here?”

“
Yes, she was. We were
both sorry that you had to miss dinner, again.”

“
I told you my schedule is
erratic,” said Vo. “Kim knows it, too. She really shouldn’t be
spending all this time preparing meals for me. How does she work
forty hours a week as a nurse in the ER and still find time to shop
for groceries and cook?” Vo sat down at the kitchen
table.

“
That’s why she’s
amazing,” said Vidal. “That’s why your mother wants you to marry
her.”

Vo didn’t respond to that
comment.

“
Anyway, I benefit, too,”
said Vidal. “I get to eat all her authentic Vietnamese
cooking.”

“
I thought you had enough
of that from my mom growing up,” said Vo.

“
It’s different. The
ingredients are different. I mean, your mom’s cooking is to die
for, but she can’t get some of the spices and herbs you can only
get here. Folks here also make things a little differently. For one
thing, I have not had any fried eggrolls since I got here, only
fried spring rolls. Have you noticed that?”

“
Okay,” said Vo. “I am
glad you are having the culinary adventure of your
life.”

“
Vo, I wish you would pay
more attention to Kim. She’s trying real hard and learning English
real fast, too. She’ll be ready when you take her to the
States.”

“
Who says I am going back
to the States?”

“
You never told me you
intended to live here forever.”

“
Well. I am telling you
now.”

“
It doesn’t make a
difference to Kim. I am sure. Her family will be glad if you both
stay here,” said Vidal. He put the last dish away and dried his
hands.

“
Why are you so eager to
help?” said Vo.

“
You know why.”

“
No. Please
elaborate.”

“
You are doing it again.
You snap at people for no reason. You are getting more and more
irritable every day and I don’t even know how to have a civilized
conversation with you anymore.”

“
Maybe I just snap at you
because you get on my nerves.” Vo stood up to leave.

“
You were not like this
before Colette died,” said Vidal.

Vo stopped, and felt a sting in his
chest.

“
You left New Orleans
because it was torture for you to stay there, because I was there
to remind you of Colette. I guess my presence here is causing you
pain, isn’t it?” Vidal took a step toward Vo.

Vo took a deep breath to suppress the
heat that was rising in his stomach. He wanted to go to his room,
to leave Vidal to his soliloquy, but he was temporarily transfixed,
now that Colette’s name was brought up.

“
And I am sorry I chased
you down, but I couldn’t stay in New Orleans anymore, either. I
need a break, and I want to talk to you. You’ve always been like a
brother to me,” said Vidal. “I am sorry that Colette betrayed you.
She betrayed me, too. And then before I could figure out what
happened, she died. You shut me off, and then left New Orleans
without saying goodbye. I lost my twin sister and my best friend
all at the same time. How do you think I feel?”

Vo was speechless. He was not prepared
to talk about Colette.

Vidal continued. “When your mother
sent me here to help you and Kim, I was glad she gave me an excuse
to come and stay with you for a while. I thought that perhaps now
we could really talk things out, and I could have my best friend
back.”

Vo stood still. His whole body was
tense now, and he was drowning once again in the disorienting
emotions that he had failed to sort out since Colette’s
death.

“
Are you going to say
anything?” said Vidal.

Vo shook his head as he turned around
to face Vidal. “Why can’t you leave me alone? I was doing fine on
my own. Why do you take it upon yourself to mess with my life? You
need a break. Use your lawyer dollars and take a fancy vacation
somewhere else. Make a new best friend.”

“
I can’t believe you are
saying this,” said Vidal. “Have you forgotten what we’ve been
through growing up together? We’ve always had each other’s back. It
was my fault that Colette ran off with a total stranger a month
before she was to marry you. I’ve regretted taking her to the
office party and introducing her to that scumbag ever
since.”

“
Stop, Vidal.”

“
But she paid for it,”
said Vidal. “She paid for it. She got punished for breaking your
heart, for breaking all of our hearts. She got punished even though
we didn’t ask for any punishment. She got punished. Oh how she got
punished.”

“
Stop!”

“
When she was killed
because her boyfriend had a little too much to drink and decided to
drive anyway, I knew the Lord had smitten her down.”

Vo stroked his forehead with his hand,
and closed his eyes for a moment to process his chaotic thoughts.
He lowered his shoulders and said to Vidal quietly, “But I
did.”

“
You did what?”

“
Ask for the punishment,”
said Vo, trying to steady his voice. “I prayed for it. I hated her
so much. I prayed for her to be punished, and she got punished. I
killed her. The car crash that killed her, I prayed for
it.”

Vidal was taken aback by Vo’s
statement. “Vo,” said Vidal softly, “you don’t seriously believe
that Colette died because of an angry curse.”

Vo sat down, and put both elbows on
the table so that he could hold his head in his hands. After a few
seconds of silence, Vo said, “I wanted her to die. God knows, I
wanted to die. When she called off the wedding and I found out that
she had been cheating, my whole world turned upside down. I felt
like I had died and landed in hell.”

Vidal listened quietly.

Vo continued. “But when it really
happened, when she really died, I realized that I never stopped
loving her even when she had broken me down to pieces. The few
weeks of pain she caused me was nothing compared to nearly four
decades of love and lives that we shared with each other. And yet I
was selfish, so selfish that I couldn’t just give her away to
another person she decided was better than me somehow, so selfish
that I wished her a rotten life. And it did rot, and so fast, too.
And now I’m mad at myself for wishing it, for not being grateful
that I had gotten to know her in the first place at all. She left
this world thinking that I hated her, and I just can’t stand the
thought of it. I loved her. I love her still now. I’ve forgiven
her, but how I wish I’d let her know before she died.”

Vo and Vidal sat without exchanging a
word for the next few minutes. Vo was mourning for Colette. Up
until this point he had bottled up his emotions and tossed it at
sea, choosing instead a life of an exile. But now the bottle,
broken, had drifted ashore in pieces, and all the emotions
returned, jagged and distorted, capable of producing even worse
wounds.

“
What took you so long to
tell me all that?” said Vidal.

“
I don’t know. My head was
split in ten different directions. Still is,” said Vo. “I wish I’d
married her right after college, instead of working on my stupid
PhD and then all that postdoc research with travels that kept me
away from what was really important. She never told me why she went
for the other guy, but I guess she did it to run away from me,
because I had put my career before her.” Vo stood up. “I’ve got to
lie down. Sorry, I’ve been a total jerk.”

“
I am to blame, too. I
just want my old pal back.”

“
I know you are hard to
get rid of,” said Vo, following it with a sniffle. His eyes and
nose were burning. He tried to smile, but his muscles were still
too tense.

“
So, you really don’t care
for Kim?” said Vidal

“
She’s like a sister to
me,” said Vo.

“
Your mother is not going
to be happy.”

“
We’ll worry about that
later.” Vo turned and started walking toward his room.
 

“
So,” said McKenzie, “my
three-year-old nephew said, ‘I don’t want to grow up to be a clown.
I want to be a statue.’” He held up an arm, pretending to be the
Statue of Liberty.

Ana laughed, and mused on McKenzie’s
face as he tried to look serious. It was always delightful to have
McKenzie around. He had a way of brightening up her day that made
her forget her problems. Even if it was only for one minute, it was
priceless.

The apartment door opened, and Zoe
came in.

“
Zoe,” said Ana. She was
surprised to see Zoe, who hadn’t been home for weeks. She got up
from the bench.

McKenzie also got up from his chair.
Zoe seemed to be headed toward her bedroom, but she had to go
through the living room first. She stood in front of McKenzie,
studying him from head to toe. Her look was somewhat
hostile.