Apple's Angst (29 page)

“You're turning out to be quite the attention whore,” her aunt said.

“Hazel! Don't talk that way to Apple,” her mother said.

“It's true!” her aunt huffed.

“So what?” Apple asked. “I'm having fun.”

“Just not too much fun, I hope,” said her mother. “I don't want you getting caught up in all that.”

“All what?” Apple asked.

“Listen, Apple. You're a good person. You always have been. And being in the public eye can change people. Just read
Angst
magazine and you'll see. Fame can be addictive.”

Was her mother actually jealous of her success?

Apple had time to ponder that thought while she glanced over the menu.

“You're so skinny now! Can you please eat more than a salad?” her mother asked while a waiter stood before them awaiting their order.

“Are you crazy? You know better than anyone that the camera adds ten pounds,” Apple said.

“I also know that you don't have to worry about
that. You look great just the way you are. In fact, you really are looking too skinny,” said her mother.

“Oh, how very motherly of you,” Apple responded.

“Wow. You really have a sarcastic side to you tonight,” her aunt said, shooting her a look. Apple was stunned. It was usually Apple and her aunt who ganged up on her mother, but now her aunt was sticking up for her mother, and they were ganging up on Apple. “And you have to fit into the bridesmaid's dress. And since you never showed up for the fitting, I had to give them one of your dresses from your closet. You have to stay the same size, or you're going to ruin my wedding! It's in two weeks!”

“Calm down, Hazel. Apple isn't going to ruin your wedding. Let's just all take a breath. We're here to toast you!” her mother said.

“Okay, you're right. I just don't want anything to go wrong,” her aunt said, taking a big sip of her champagne.

“Don't worry, Hazel. Nothing is going to ruin your wedding. You are going to be a beautiful bride,” her mother said.

“I know I shouldn't, because I have to fit into the wedding gown, but I'm going to get the fries. Are you joining me, Apple? I mean, this is my dinner, and I don't want to be the only one eating calories,” her aunt muttered.

“It's called willpower. I'll just stick with the lettuce,” Apple said.

Apple somehow managed to get through dinner, although her heart wasn't in it. She nodded and laughed
at the right times. Her mother looked at her strangely once or twice, but Apple figured she would just think her daughter was overly tired.

She hadn't told anyone, aside from Emme, about her breakup with Lyon. She also hadn't told her aunt or her mother about the upcoming issue of
Angst
, which featured mostly Apple. Aunt Hazel will be disappointed too, thought Apple. She also couldn't shake the feeling that she was a bad employee for allowing Emme to do her column, even if she hadn't been in the right state of mind herself. For the first time that she could remember, she didn't want to call Happy or Brooklyn. She felt scared to call them, just in case they treated her like they had at the Spiral Staircase this morning, dismissively. She had no one she wanted to talk to, and for a moment she felt a great sadness. She felt lonely, and yet she hadn't ever been so popular or so well known.

At home, Apple checked her e-mail one last time and was surprised to see there was a message from Sloan.

“Come out with me sometime? XO Sloan,” he had sent.

She couldn't believe it. Sloan was asking her out? On a real date?

At least the night ended on a high note. Lyon may have dumped her, her mother may be annoying her, her aunt may be mad at her, and her friends may not want to talk to her, but there was someone who was interested in hanging out with Apple. And Sloan Starr wasn't just
anyone
.

Apple needn't have worried. The next issue of
Angst
came out and no one seemed to think anything other than that Apple's advice was great. Emme winked at her. Apple had gotten away with it. She thanked Emme again.

“Any time!” Emme said, refusing to listen to any more of Apple's profuse thank-you's.

Apple didn't feel down now. Even Emme was amazed at how well she was taking the breakup and told her that it was a good sign, that the breakup was meant to be. Zen had, over the weeks, stopped trying to get in touch with her at all. Apple felt only relief over that. Yes, she once had been in love with him, and their kisses had been phenomenal, but there was no way it was going to work out with them. It was too complicated, what with him being Happy's ex, and she was busy with work. Apple hadn't bothered getting in touch with Zen either, which Emme also told Apple said a lot.

Apple had an exciting night ahead of her. She had to tell someone. News like this was too good to keep to herself. Though she was well aware that things had fallen off the rails a bit with Happy and Brooklyn, she wanted to share it with them. She didn't exactly miss Lyon, but she realized that she really did miss Happy and Brooklyn.

“Happy! Oh, my God. I feel like we haven't spoken forever! You're not going to believe what I'm about to do,” Apple screeched into the phone when Happy picked up.

“Well, if it isn't the famous Apple,” responded Happy.

Was it just Apple? Happy didn't seem so happy to hear from her, even though they hadn't really talked in days.

“You're not going to believe who I'm about to meet up with,” Apple said excitedly, trying to ignore the awkwardness and Happy's tone. “On a date!”

“I bet I can't,” said Happy flatly.

“Come on, just try!” Apple begged.

“I don't know. I really have no idea,” Happy responded, despondently. She obviously wasn't in the mood for any guessing games.

“Fine. I'll just tell you, then. Sloan. Sloan Starr! Can you believe it?”

“Really?” said Happy, sounding a little more interested. “He asked you out on a date?”

“Yes!” screeched Apple. “A real date!”

She knew Happy had to be interested now.

“Aren't you going to ask how it happened?” Apple said.

“Tell me,” said Happy, sounding more eager. Apple was relieved that Happy seemed to want to hear the story. That meant Happy was still interested in Apple's life and was acting like a friend.

Apple launched into the story of how Sloan had showed up at
Angst
earlier that day for his television taping, and said that if Apple didn't interview him, he'd refuse to do it.

Nancy and Michael had been as shocked as Apple to hear Sloan's demand. Apple wasn't even sure she
could
interview him. She didn't know how to interview people. But Sloan had held firm to his request.

“Just read the cards,” Michael had advised her as Celia retouched her makeup, “and you'll be fine. Just talk to him like you're talking to a friend.”

Apple did as Michael suggested and the interview went amazingly. She even forgot they were on camera, she was so into their conversation. She threw out questions as if she were talking to a friend, ignoring most of the questions that Michael had given her. Michael was impressed. After the interview, Sloan casually asked Apple to meet up with him later that night, to “really get to know each other.”

“Can you believe it?” Apple asked Happy, after telling her the story.

“No,” said Happy. “I really can't.”

“Okay, you have to meet up with us after,” Apple said.

“I wish!” Happy said. “But I really can't.”

Had her best friend gone crazy? Happy, at least the Happy Apple thought she knew, would NEVER turn down a chance to hang out with a real celebrity.

“But you're obsessed with him. Don't worry! I'll get you on the list! You have to be on a list, but it's not a problem, Happy. Come! Everyone will be so jealous, and you've always wanted to meet him in person!”

“I really can't,” Happy said again, sounding disappointed.

“Yes, you can,” Apple said.

What was Happy's problem? She was usually all about the fun. She couldn't believe her celebrity-obsessed best friend was turning down a chance to meet Sloan Starr. And Apple was going out of her way to include her.

“No, Apple. I can't. Don't you remember we have our math exam tomorrow?” Happy asked.

“Oh, God. I totally forgot. Why didn't you remind me?” Apple moaned.

“Oh, I'm sorry,” said Happy, not sounding sorry at all. “But this is the first time you've called in days. And you've skipped more classes in the past couple months than Brooklyn has all year. And that's really saying something.”

“You're right,” Apple said, feeling worried. “There's no way I can pass the exam.”

“No, it's not good. You should really stay home tonight and study,” Happy suggested.

“Well, there's no way I'm canceling on Sloan. I mean, that would be so rude,” said Apple, glancing at her textbook on her desk, feeling guilty about not studying at all.

“Right. You're just not canceling because it's Sloan. You know, you used to have your priorities straight,” Happy told Apple. “I'm not sure who you are anymore.”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Apple asked. She didn't have time to get into an argument with Happy, especially about math class. She was meeting Sloan and she needed to get ready and pick out something really fabulous to wear. She didn't understand why Happy was being such a party pooper. Happy would get a great mark even if she didn't stay home tonight.

“Well, I mean, you shouldn't worry that much. It's not like the math teacher isn't marrying your aunt. There's no way he'd fail you, I don't think. Oh, by the way, we picked out her centerpieces,” Happy said to Apple. “We still need to find her a dress, though.”

“What do you mean you picked out her centerpieces?” Apple said.

“Hazel didn't tell you?” Happy asked.

“No, I haven't had time to talk to her,” Apple responded.

Apple knew that her aunt loved Happy, but was it possible that they had gone out, without Apple, to get her aunt ready for her wedding?

“Well, I don't have time to talk now either. I have to study for the exam, like everyone else,” Happy said.

“Oh, come on, Happy!” Apple said. She couldn't believe Happy was being so harsh to her. “Why are you being this way?”

“Okay, fine. Sorry. I'm just freaking out a little. I have four more chapters to get through. What are you going to do? Study or Sloan?” Happy asked.

“What do you mean? I'm going out with Sloan. I'm going to fail the test whether I stay in and study or not. So I may as well go out and have some fun,” said Apple.

“Well, have a good time,” Happy said. “I can't wait to hear all about it. Or I'm sure I'll at least
read
about it somewhere.”

She hung up on Apple.

Apple didn't even have the chance to ask Happy her opinion on what she should wear.

Happy picked up instantly when Apple redialed.

“So did you come to your senses?” Happy said, before saying hello.

“What?” Apple asked.

“About studying?” Happy asked. “Have you decided to stay in?”

“No. I was calling to ask you your thoughts on that pink dress I bought,” Apple said. “Do you think Sloan will like it?”

“Are you serious, Apple?” Happy muttered.

“Yes, why?”

“You're really unbelievable,” Happy said, adding, “You're not the same!”

No, thought Apple. Happy was the one behaving unbelievably. She couldn't believe that Happy was helping her aunt with her wedding. Sure, Apple hadn't been around, but it was her family, not Happy's. And Apple had always been supportive of Happy when it came to new men, so why wasn't Happy reciprocating? And if Apple had to hear, from one more person, that she had changed … Maybe she had changed. So what? Why was change such a bad thing? Wasn't that what everyone had always told her? Why did Apple feel like everyone was just trying to hold her back?