Appointment in Samarra (20 page)

The woman closed the door in his face and in a few minutes she came back and handed him a check and a five-dollar bill. The cash is for you. A tip, said the woman. Stick it Al began. Don t you say that to me, you dago wop, said the old woman. I got two boys would teach you how to talk. If you don t want the money, give it here.

The hell I will, said Al. Aw, my goodness. Where you going, beautiful lady? You going somewhere? said Foxie Lebrix. Can that stuff, said Helene Holman. Will you phone down to Taqua and get me a taxi? I ll pay you for the call.

Aw, but I hate to see you leave. I t out you and I

I know you thought, but we ain t, see? If you don t want to get me a taxi, say so and I ll walk it, said Helene. Wit all dose bags?

You re damn right. The quicker I get out of this place the better I like it. Well, what about the taxi?

Wall, I would not see you walking in the snow. Maybe we see each other in New York some day, and you get me a taxi when I leave your place, eh? Sure I get you a taxi.

CHAPTER 8 MARY KLEIN had gone home to lunch and Julian was alone in the office, with a small array of sheets of paper on which were rows of figures, names, technical words: Number of cars sold in 1930; our cut on new cars sold; gas and oil profit 1930; tires and accessories profit 1930; profit on resale of cars taken in trade; other profit; insurance on building; ins. on equipment; ins. on rolling stock; interest on bldg.; taxes; advertising; graft; expenses; light; other elec. outlay; heat; tool replacement; licenses; office stuff, incl. stationery; workmen s compensation; protective association; telephones; bad debts; stamps; trade-in losses; lawyer & accountant fees; building repairs; losses not covered by ins.; plumber; depreciation on bldg.; deprec. on equipment; depr. on trade-in jobs; depr. on new cars not moved; contributions to charity; cash advance to self; notes due at bank; cash needed for payroll. ... As a result of his figuring Julian announced to the empty room: I have to have five thousand dollars.

He stood up. I said, I have to have five thousand dollars, and I don t know where I can get it. & Yes, I do. Nowhere. He knew he was lying to himself; that he did not need five thousand dollars. He needed money, and he needed it soon, but not five thousand dollars. Two thousand would be enough, and with any break in the beginning of the year, after the auto shows in New York and Philadelphia (which are attended by a surprising number of Gibbsville automobile enthusiasts), he would be able to get back on his feet. But he reasoned that it was just as hard to get two thousand as five, five thousand as two. It was easier to get five, he told himself; and as he had argued less than a year ago, when he had gone to Harry Reilly for a loan, he might as well go for a neat, convenient-sounding sum. The question seemed to be: Where to get it. Tempers are better in summer than in winter, in Gibbsville; Julian s summer life had included a good deal of Harry Reilly last summer, and it was easy enough to get away from him. If you didn t want to play golf with Harry, you said you had promised Caroline to play a match for blood with her, which did away with the necessity of asking Harry to play along. On the other hand, it was not bad to drink with Harry in a party of undershirted convivials in the locker-room, and Harry was a fair tenor and even knew songs about the roll of Delta Kappa Epsilon, Lafayette was Lafayette when Lehigh was a pup, the Lord Jeff of Amherst, and a lot of other college songs. Of course Harry got the words wrong sometimes, but Julian was no purist who would discourage the progress of a fair tenor. No, a good tenor, as locker-room tenors go. He thought of these things. Harry must have changed since then, become obnoxious or something. Julian reasoned that he could not have asked the Harry he now knew to invest so much money in the business. Well, maybe the winter had something to do with it. You went to the Gibbsville Club for lunch; Harry was there. You went to the country club to play squash on Whit Hofman s private court, and Harry was around. You went to the Saturday night drinking parties, and there was Harry; inescapable, everywhere. Carter Davis was there, too, and so was Whit; so was Froggy Ogden. But they were different. The bad news never had worn off Harry Reilly. And the late fall and winter seemed now to have been spoiled by room after room with Harry Reilly. You could walk outside in the summer, but even though you can walk outside in winter, winter isn t that way. You have to go back to the room soon, and there is no life in the winter outside of rooms. Not in Gibbsville, which was a pretty small room itself. Well, what was the use of trying to build up Harry now as having been a swell guy last summer. Last summer Julian had needed money, and Harry Reilly had money, so he had asked Harry. And Harry had said: Jesus, I ain t got that much cash at this present minute. Do you need it right away? Julian had said he needed it pretty soon. Well, I don t see how I can get it for you before tomorrow. & Oh, hell, sure I can. Julian had almost laughed in his face: in one minute the little worry that Harry wanted to have a month to think it over and raise the cash had come and gone. Julian had had a lot more trouble in college, trying to borrow forty-four cents to go to the movies. & Harry had been no different then from the Harry he knew today. Might as well face that. As for the Caroline angle, Julian believed in a thought process that if you think against a thing in advance, if you anticipate it whether it s the fear that you re going to cut yourself when you shave, or lose your wife to another man you ve licked it. It can t happen, because things like that are known only by God. Any future thing is known only to God; and if you have a super-premonition about a thing, it ll be wrong, because God is God, and is not giving away one of His major powers to Julian McHenry English. So Julian thought and thought about Caroline and Harry, and thought against them, against their being drawn to each other sexually, which was the big thing that mattered. By God, no one else will have her in bed, he said, to the empty office. And immediately began the worst fear he had ever known that this day, this week, this minute, next year, sometime she would open herself to another man and close herself around him. Oh, if she did that it would be forever. Julian reached in the second drawer of the desk and took out a Colt s .25 automatic and got up and went to the washroom. He was breathless with excitement and he felt his eyes get the way they got when he was being thrilled, big but sharp. He sat down on the toilet, and he knew he was not going to do it that way. But be wanted to sit down and look at the pistol. He looked at it for he knew not how long, and then snapped himself to without changing his position in the slightest degree. He put the barrel in his mouth and some oil touched the inside of his lower lip. He made a Guck sound, and took a long breath, and then he put the pistol in his pocket and got up and washed his mouth with cold water and then he took off his upper garments, except his undershirt, and washed himself all over the head and face and arms to the elbow. He used four towels, drying himself. Then he put on his clothes again, wiped stray drops of water off his shoes, and went back to the office and lit a cigarette. He remembered a bottle of whiskey he had in the desk, and he had a long-lasting drink of one whiskey glass of it. Oh, I couldn t, he said, and he put his arms on the desk and his head on his arms, and he wept. You poor guy, he said. I feel so sorry for you.

He heard the first of the mechanics post-luncheon sounds the thump of a baseball in a catcher s mitt. That meant the mechanics were through lunch, because one of the men pitched on a semi-pro team, and he kept himself in shape all winter. Julian held his head up and the phone rang. Hello, he said. I just tried to get you at the club. Where d you have lunch? It was Caroline. I didn t, he said. Well, I don t suppose you felt much like it. Now listen, Julian, the reason I called is, if you talk the way you did to Mrs. Grady again, we re through. Do you hear?

Yes.

I mean it this time. I m not going to have you take your hangovers out on any servants. Mrs. Grady should have slapped your face.

Say!

It s about time someone slapped your face. Now I want you to understand this, old boy. If you come home drunk this afternoon and start raising hell, I ll simply call up every person we ve invited and call off the party.

You ll simply, huh?

Oh, shut up, she said, and ended the call. She ll simply, he said, to the telephone, and gently replaced the handpiece in the cradle. She ll simply. He got up and put on his hat. He stopped and debated, a very short debate, whether to leave a note for Mary Klein. Naa, who s Mary Klein? He struggled into his coat and drove to the Gibbsville Club. The usual crowd was not in the club this day. Hello, Straight, said Julian to the steward. Good afternoon, Mr. English. I hope you had a merry Christmas. Uh, we all want to thank you for your, uh, generous, uh, subscription to the club employes Christmas fund. Uh. Old Straight always spoke as though he had just been sniffing ammonia. Well, you re very welcome, I m sure, said Julian. Have a nice Christmas?

Quite nice. Of course, uh, well, of course I have no family that you d uh, really call a family, uh. My nevview in South Africa, he

Mr. Davis in the club? Who s here? Never mind. I ll go look.

Not many members here today. The day, uh, day after

I know, said Julian. He went into the dining-room, and at first glance it appeared that it was occupied solely by Jess, the Negro waiter. But there was a small table in one comer, by common consent or eminent domain, the lawyers table, at which sat a few lawyers, all older men and not all of them Gibbsville men, but residents of the smaller towns who came to the county seat when they had to. You did not have to speak to the men at the lawyers table. In fact, some of the men who sat there did not speak to each other. Julian had hoped Carter Davis might still be in the club, but there was no sign of him. He sat down at a table for two, and he no sooner had given his order than he was joined by Froggy Ogden. Sit down and eat. I just ordered. Jess ll take your order and serve it with mine if you want to.

I don t want to, said Froggy. Well, then, sit down and take the load off.

You re feeling pretty snotty today, said Froggy, sitting down. Snotty isn t the word for it. Cigarette?

No, thanks. Listen, Julian, I didn t come here for a friendly chat.

Oh, no?

No, said Froggy. You could see he was getting angry. Well, then, come on. I ve been hearing the anvil chorus all day, so you might as well join it. What kind of a fig have you got

Now listen, I m older than you

Oh, it s going to be one of those. And you have my best interests at heart? That one? Jesus Christ, you re not going to give me that.

No. I m not. I m older than you in more ways than one.

What you re trying to say is you lost your arm in the war. Do you mind if I help you? You lost your arm in the war, and you ve suffered, and that makes you older than me, and if you had both arms I guess you d thrash me within an inch of my life.

Froggy stared at him until they heard the wall clock ticking. Yes. I have a notion to bust you one right now. You God damn son of a bitch, Caroline is my cousin, and even if she wasn t my cousin she s one of the finest girls there is, Caroline is. You want to know something? When she told me she was going to marry you, I tried to stop it. I always hated you. I always hated your guts when you were a kid, and I hate you now. You never were any damn good. You were a slacker in the war oh, I know how old you were. You could of got in if you d tried. You were yellow when you were a kid and you grew up yellow. You chased around after that Polish girl till she had to go away or her father would have killed her. Then you put on some kind of an act with Caroline, and God help her, she fell for it. I tried to stop it, but no. She said you had changed. I

You re a dirty God damn one-armed bastard, and I wish you had that other arm.

You don t have to wish it, said Froggy, and he picked up the glass of water and threw the water in Julian s face. Come on outside. I ll fight you with one arm. Trembling with rage, Julian stood up, and then he felt weak. He knew he was not afraid; he knew he could not fight Froggy. He still liked him, for one thing; and for another, he could not see himself fighting a man who had only one arm. Come on. Anywhere you say, said Froggy. Julian wiped the water off his face with a napkin. I don t want to fight you. He wondered, but did not turn his head to ascertain it, whether the men at the lawyers table had seen the incident. He heard some children playing in the street and he thought of horrible Saturday mornings at the dentist s, when he was a kid and horses were being whipped and children were playing in the street and the car to Collieryville would be ringing its bell. Come on. Don t stand there because I only have one arm. I ll worry about that. Don t you.

Go away. Beat it, said Julian. You re showing off. You know I can t fight you.

Come outside or by Jesus I ll sock you in here.

No, you won t. I won t let you sock me in here, hero, and I won t fight you outside. You think I d give people the chance to say that about me? You re crazy. Go on, beat it, General. The war s over.

Yeah? That s what you think. You re right. I knew you wouldn t fight. There isn t a spark of manhood in you. I knew you wouldn t fight. There isn t a spark of manhood left in you, if there ever was one.

Run along, cousin. Go on home and count your medals. Froggy swung on him and Julian put up his open hand and the punch made a slight smack sound on his wrist, and hurt his wrist. Gentlemen!

Don t be a God damn fool, said Julian. Well, then, come on outside.

Gentlemen! You know the club rules. It was Straight. He stood in front of Froggy, with his back toward Froggy, facing Julian. He certainly made it look as though he were protecting Froggy from an attack by Julian. By this time there was no doubt about the lawyers being in on the quarrel. They were all watching, and two of them were standing up. Julian heard one of them say something about see what he did ... one arm. He knew they were doing just what everyone else would do who heard about this: they were taking for granted that he had socked Froggy. One stout man, whom Julian knew only as a lawyer face around the court house and Gibbsville restaurants during court terms, walked over and put his hand on Froggy s shoulder. Did he hit you, Captain Ogden?