Aris Returns (6 page)

“I wish you to keep a watchful eye then report to me. His reputation is sour and he
must not stand in the way of the advancement of my family at court. I have seen you
in his company and I see he favors you. He acts freely when he is with you. Stay him,
Aris, from ill rumors and you will win my favor.”

“It will be an honor, my lady, to stand for the Boleyn name.”

“And if you perform my bidding to my satisfaction, I have another intrigue, far more
important and deeply dangerous.”

“My lady?”

“No, not now. I will summon you again when I am ready, but I will tell you this, it
involves a man high at court, some say closest to the throne.”

Could it be Wolsey? The cardinal? I could feel the rise in my eyebrows at the import
of the man of whom she spoke, the man who was second to only the King and who some
said was the true ruler of England.

“Are you still loyal?” She laughed as she spoke.

“Yes my lady, I am always loyal.” I nodded my head in agreement.

“Go then Aris. Fulfill the first task, only then will you earn my trust
for the second.”

I bowed and assisted her onto her horse. She turned to look at me once more before
she rode away. She heeled the animal and it jumped into a gallop.

I felt a cold chill and spoke to no one but the trees. “It is obvious by her eyes
that someone in this realm should be very afraid.” I mounted my horse then rode from
the clearing.

#

“One, two, three, four, five. Eyes open. Wide awake.” His eyes fluttered a few times
then stayed open.

“Astounding! It’s like watching a film. Except I am in it. I can almost taste the
air and feel the earth beneath my feet.”

Sarah watched him. She noticed his voice remained deeper and his words were a bit
strange for a Latin American from the twenty-first century.

He was silent for a moment before he spoke again. “Man, let’s go back there. I want
to know what that broad wants from me.”

Sarah smiled as her client returned to his full current self. “No, enough for today.
We’ll revisit England next session. How do you feel?”

“Kind a weird, same as last time. But calm. I feel really calm right now.” He stretched
his arms over his head and yawned. “Why is that?”

“It’s a product of the hypnosis. Your body relaxes and your heart beat slows. Your
blood pressure lowers. It’s as if your body is sleeping yet your mind is alert.”

“Yeah? Well, I like it so far.” He straightened the chair back to a sitting position.
“Want to go get some coffee?”

Sarah stopped herself from saying yes. She needed to keep a safe distance from him.
She didn’t understand all her feelings about him but one thing was for certain, she
didn’t want to explore them any further. “No, sorry. It really isn’t protocol to have
coffee
with my clients.”

“How about the other night?”

“That was an accident. And it was only once. Now, I’d like to discuss . . . ”

He lifted his hand to stop her comment. “Why don’t you just think that over, the coffee
I mean? See if you can’t change your mind next time.” He stood. He walked to the coat
tree, grabbing his jacket. “See you next week Sarah.” His smile was sure and cocky
as he opened the door to leave.

“S
o what’s so important about this Carlos Havarro? You’ve never come to me for help
before.” Steve placed the menu on the table as he waved for the waiter.

“This is my first parolee, Steve.” She couldn’t answer his question, even to herself.
Why did Carlos continue to occupy her thoughts? She met other handsome young men who
showed her interest. She never responded to any of them before and none of them had
been ex-cons. Why this one? It was an enigma she didn’t seem able to solve. He even
popped into her mind when she first woke up in the morning. She wondered for just
a moment if she wasn’t obsessing about him to keep her mind off her stagnant love
life.

Steve intruded into her thoughts. “Anyway, I couldn’t find out anything more than
the information in the file you sent over. He’s just some small time hood who isn’t
worth much to society. Just like the rest of them.”

“Yeah, well this one is intelligent. That and he never had a chance.”

“Sarah, I honestly don’t know why you’re even getting involved with this guy. This
isn’t your usual middle class housewife with low self-esteem whose poor miserable
husband pays you a hundred bucks an hour to tell her she’s okay.”

“Thanks Steve. It’s really great to know what you think of my profession.”

“Come on babe.” He could see she was irritated by his attitude, yet he didn’t even
try to alter his condescending tone. “It’s just I don’t know why your friend even
got you involved with this guy. This is way out of your league. And from what I read,
he’s pretty dangerous, really nothing but a big time loser.”

“First of all,” she gathered her coat and bag, “my friend has respect for what I do.
She actually thinks I can help him. Second of all, go to hell.” She stood, walking
quickly to the door. He watched her without emotion, sure she would think better of
her reaction and come back to the table to finish dinner.

Slipping her arms into her coat, she pushed the door open, stepped out into the cold
evening air and checked both directions of traffic for an empty taxi. Seeing one on
her side of the street, she stuck her fingers in her mouth, whistled and the cab pulled
to the curb. Settling into the back seat, she gave the driver her address. As the
driver pulled away, she didn’t even turn to see Steve who had finally moved to the
doorway, amazed that she actually left.

The lights of the city reflected in the windows of the tall buildings as the cab drove
slowly through the rush hour traffic. Sarah smiled to herself. She would have to tell
Bonnie how well their therapy sessions had paid off.

#

“How could I have wasted three months on that jerk?” She was bundled up in her blue
and white flannel pajamas with a glass of merlot in one hand while she held the phone
in the other.

“I hate to say it but I will anyway. I told you so. He was an ego on feet from the
first to the last. I honestly don’t know how you can be surprised.” Colleen’s voice
had a laugh in it as she answered. “I never liked the schmuck.”

“Okay, okay. So you were right. Next time I’ll pay attention to
you. I need all the help I can get when it comes to picking men. Not everybody can
find a guy like Bob.”

“Yeah, well Bob wasn’t like Bob when I met him. It took a lot of work to make him
human, let me tell you. A cop isn’t the most sensitive guy in the world.”

“Sure. Sure. Take all the credit for him. He was great right from the start.”

“A lot you know. And hon, I wish you’d just realize you don’t need a man in your life
to make you a whole person. You’re doing fine on your own.”

“I know that C, it’s just sometimes I feel driven to find my soul mate.” She laughed.
“Now I sound like one of those drippy women in soap operas.”

“No, you don’t. It’s easy for me now that I have Bob. It wasn’t always like that,
remember all the losers I dated?”

“Yeah, remember Thom-ass?” They both burst out laughing.

When they were able to breathe again, Colleen spoke. “So, how are things going with
Carlos? I saw him yesterday and he said he likes coming to you. I think it’s making
a difference in him. He can sit still for more than a minute and now, he even makes
eye contact.”

“He didn’t make eye contact before?” Sarah sat up, placing her wine glass on the coffee
table.

“No, I’ve never seen him look anyone in the eye. Why?”

“No reason.” She adjusted the cushions then leaned back once again remembering his
dark eyes locking onto hers during talk therapy. “It must be a trust thing. I use
the usual suggestions for relaxation and he says they work.”

“What about the past life stuff? Have you tried any of that yet?”

“A little. We’re just getting into it. He seems very receptive.”

“Well, he’s done a lot of drugs in the past. It should be easy to make him see things
that aren’t there?” Colleen laughed an ironic laugh.

“He’s not still doing them, is he?”

“No, he went into rehab last year. It was hell for him but he’s stayed clean since
then. I honestly think he wants to straighten out. He thinks a lot of you.”

Sarah sat up again. “Yes?”

“Yeah. He talks about you a lot when I see him. He’s always thanking me for sending
him to you. I think he believes in what you’re doing with him.” The call waiting signal
could be heard from Colleen’s cell phone. “Gotta go hon. Got another bird on the line.
Talk to you soon.” Suddenly, dead silence. Conversations with Colleen always seemed
to end abruptly without warning.

Sarah picked up her wine from the table and settled into the cushions when her cell
rang again. She didn’t want to answer it. She wanted to think about her conversation
with her friend but, in her business, her time wasn’t her own. She checked the caller
I.D. It was an unfamiliar number so she opened the phone to speak. “Hello?”

“Sarah, it’s Carlos. Want to have a cup of coffee?”

“Carlos, I told you before. I can’t have a relationship with a client outside of the
office.”

“Then what if I stop being a client?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. We’re in this together to help to heal you.”

“I like the ‘together’ part.” Suddenly, the phone went dead.

“Doesn’t anyone ever say goodbye?” She sighed as she took a sip of her wine.

#

The line at the bar was long so the two women decided to go back to their seats in
the theatre and wait for the second act without the ritual glass of wine. Sarah loved
going to the opera. It wasn’t only the music and costumes but the whole evening. People
dressed in lovely clothes, all the women smelling wonderful and wearing exquisite
jewelry. The festivity reminded her of Christmas
and the winter holidays were her favorite time of year.

Her mind wandered to the Christmases when she was married to Jeff. He had always acted
as if the span from Thanksgiving to New Year was an enormous waste of time. How different
they were. Why in the world had she married him?

“Bonnie, do you think I choose unavailable men because I’m really afraid of love?”
Sarah almost laughed as she watched Bonnie put on her mental therapist’s cap.

“Sarah, we’ve talked about this in session. I don’t think you’re afraid to love. I
just don’t think you know what it is. You sure weren’t in love with Jeff. He was so
crazy about himself that there was no room for anyone else to really care about him.
He didn’t need it. Or you.”

“So, am I afraid to be needed?”

“I don’t think that’s it either. Your clients need you.”

“Yeah but that’s different. There’s no two-way intimacy. There’s a professional wall
that protects me from that.”

“Look, you’ve spent most of your life trying to please other people. Your mother,
for instance. Anything she wanted, you did. Ballet. Gymnastics. Anything she asked
you to do whether you liked it or not, you did without ever saying a word. And then
we have your father. A good provider but I wouldn’t say he was the most loving man
in the world. Little girls need their father’s love, their assurance. All he did was
tell you everything you did wrong. If you got an A he wanted to know why it wasn’t
an A+”

“Not really . . . “

“Come on, I’m not saying he didn’t care for you. I’m sure he did but he didn’t instill
you with a whole lot of self-confidence. You’ve built that all by yourself and you
should be proud. When you married Jeff, you just married your father in another body.
Many, many women do that, just like men marry the embodiment of their mothers. It’s
just what humans do.

“What I’m saying is you have never really felt love. To be loved and to give love
in an adult relationship is something that is foreign to you.”

Sarah began to speak but Bonnie raised her hand to silence her companion. “I know
you love your friends but it isn’t the same. So the answer to your question is no,
I don’t think you’re afraid of love. I simply don’t think you’ve found it yet.”

The chimes rang and the lights of the theatre flickered to announce the beginning
of Act II.

Bonnie leaned closer to Sarah and whispered, “Don’t worry, you just have to find the
right man and love will come to get you.”

“W
here are you?” She flipped on the recorder. She forgot to turn it on at the beginning
of the session and she didn’t want to miss a word.

#

CARLOS HAVARRO, transcript, session 4, March 5

I am in a tavern in a poor part of London with George Boleyn. His drunken friends
left us to stagger back to court but he was not about to leave while there was still
ale in the cups. I stayed his companion to watch him as I was bid by Lady Anne. The
fire burned low and all of the tables were empty save for the two of us and a few
laughing men in the back of the room.