Arranged by the Stars (5 page)

He checked the airway,
compromised. He wasn’t supposed to move past A unless it was
sorted.

He couldn’t do this. He
was going to lose this patient. This man. This person who was
Mandy’s husband. How dare he think he could come in here and
practice medicine again? The man clutched at his chest and all
Kieran saw was Johnny all over again. His best friend, the man he
couldn’t save when everything depended on it.

“
Is he
allergic to anything Mandy?” Jessie asked.

Kieran focused on the man
in front of him. Stuart. His lips were bluish now. He could hear
the wheeze, see the rise and fall of his chest. He’d watched
helpless as Johnny had clutched onto life. The similarities made
his insides churn. He looked for an escape, a way out. His gaze
lifted only to see Ash watch him with such faith that he
stumbled.

Jessie was getting
nowhere with Mandy who was now in full panic mode as she realised
how dire the situation had become. As the tension heightened in the
room Kieran felt relief from the heat when Ash swung around causing
a slight breeze as she settled between him and Stuart. She held
Mandy’s hand and pulled her closer.

“
Stuart is in
very good hands, Kieran is a brilliant doctor. Time magazine said
he is one of the best minds in his field,” she winked at
him.

He wasn’t sure which to
be more surprised at, that she read Time magazine, or that she was
stretching the truth. Time magazine was talking about his
development of a software programme, and it had nothing to do with
his skills as a doctor.

She then lowered her head
and those fringed lashes settled making her appear serious. “Is he
normally well? Is there anything that might make him ill?
Allergic?”

Mary shook her head and
then stopped. “Well he gets hives when he drinks white wine, but we
weren’t having wine. We were having shellfish.”

His gaze caught Ash’s. He
shook his head, more in disbelief than anything else. Ash had a
talent for asking exactly the right questions.

Kieran looked at the
monitor. “Get me the adrenaline.” He addressed Mandy. “Did you know
that some white wines have shellfish in them?”

Mandy rubbed her red
eyes. “No, I can’t say I knew that. We hardly ever drink wine or
eat shellfish. But we were here at the seafood place down at the
beach. Everything in Goa is like Paradise and we had to try the
seafood. That Portuguese restaurant is amazing. It was our
anniversary. Forty years.”

He hadn’t known much
about wine himself until his trips abroad to New Zealand and
Australia. That had seemed like a lifetime ago.

Jessie handed him the
Epipen, which he then injected into Stuarts’ thigh. As he turned up
the oxygen flow, he turned to Mandy who watched his every move with
suspicion.

“
Your husband
has had an allergic reaction. I have given him an adrenaline shot.
That will help reverse the effects of the allergen but we need to
send him to hospital to make sure he doesn’t have a rebound
reaction when this wears off. We also have to give him
antihistamines to help him feel better.” He paused to make sure
Mandy took in all that he had said. “He’s going to be fine. He is
highly allergic to shellfish, so keep that off your
menu.”

Ash took hold of Mandy’s
hand. “That’s a relief to know what to look out for so this never
happens again. Would you like me to make some tea? It might help
you feel better.”

Mandy nodded. “That
sounds nice.” She bent her head closer to Ash. “He’s going to be
okay.”

Kieran watched Ash as she
spoke quietly to Mandy. Those eyes sparkled again and when she
swept her hair aside he was sure the air in the room
changed.

The sound of her laughter
was like raindrops tinkering on the window pane. “Aren’t you lucky
you chose to come into our office?”

The lump in his throat
made swallowing difficult. With those green eyes, maybe she was
bewitched. It wasn’t possible to be that unaffected by all that had
happened today. Was she aware of the seriousness of what could have
been? That child could have been seriously ill. What if he couldn’t
get a line in, or couldn’t diagnose the cause of the dehydration?
He could have lost that baby.

What about this man who’s
fighting for his life? This man could’ve died. He could’ve stopped
breathing. His heart could’ve stopped beating. Anaphylaxis could be
fatal.

His right arm ached, the
pins and needles came back and he had to shake off the feeling
again. It became harder to control the feeling. He clenched his
hands into tight fists. He knew if he didn’t, the tremors would
start.

He was a useless doctor.
He’d tried to recover from this problem like an addict would, but
he’d always come back to this psychological block. He accepted his
fate, his skills was better served behind a desk. Better running a
software design programme company instead of being out here being a
doctor.

The psychologists said
that it was all in his head. There was no physical reason for the
weakness in his hands. He’d tried so many times to crack that wall
but each time he picked up a scalpel, the result was always the
same, his arm would become so numb that it turned to
ice.

Relief poured through him
when the ambulance siren could be heard in the distance. Glad that
in a few minutes he wouldn’t have to be responsible for the life of
this man, he wrote his notes making sure he had every detail in
order.

Mandy tugged his hand as
he rose to leave. “Doctor, thank you so much for saving my Stuart’s
life. He’s all I have in this world. I don’t know what I would’ve
done without him.”

The breath he took hurt.
A slight nod was all he could afford without showing her how scared
he really was. After all he was the doctor and he was supposed to
instil confidence. How could he tell her that he’d lost that
confidence years ago, and not even saving her husbands’ life, could
bring any part of it back to him.

An hour and a dozen
drinks later, Kieran was sure that the pain in his gut was blurring
into nothingness again.

He tapped the wooden
counter and his words slurred when he spoke. “R…raoul, another one
p…please.”

The bartender came over
to him and slapped him lightly across the shoulder. “Sorry Dr Kanna
but the bar is closed for you. Can I get someone to escort you
upstairs?”

Kieran shook his head and
then felt the room spin. “Hey, Raoul, stop spinning around like
that.” He laughed and held onto the bar counter. “Okay, man? I am
having a bad day.”

“
I’m sorry
doctor, but house rules. We don’t serve anyone any more alcohol if
they are over the limit.” Raoul pointed to a sign.

Kieran tried to stand up
but the room spun around again. “Okay.” Sitting down a little
harder than expected he felt dizziness mix with nausea. He held
onto the counter again and closed his eyes. With his next breath,
he smelt that exotic scent that was becoming familiar to him. A
scent that knocked him out between the eyes, and left him out of
touch with reality. Ash.

“
Raoul, two
black, strong coffees please.”

Yes, that was the voice
of the angel that went with that scent. The voice that made him
yearn for something he’d walked away from. Something he couldn’t
even remember.

His eyes opened and he
turned. “Ashhh—? Am I dreaming?”

It was possible that he
was dreaming her. After all why would she be here? They’d saved a
patient and then he’d left the office. He was entitled to, after
all his symptoms had returned and he didn’t want her to see him
like that. A cripple, less than perfect person who couldn’t be the
man he wanted to be.

“
Sure why
not, let’s go with that theory. Much better than, I tracked you
down because you left a room full of patients waiting for hours.
Poor Jessie, bless her, had to reschedule or defer them to other
clinics. Do you have any idea how worried everyone is?” When her
gaze met his, there was pure green fire in them. The mere fact they
could reflect such passion, fascinated him. Even though his senses
were dull and his reaction times were a little slower, he was sure
that his heart was still in arrhythmia.

He leaned forward and put
a finger out moving closer to that perfect skin. Such fiery beauty
in such a young face. The urge to touch his lips to hers, was a
force that was undeniable. When she slapped his hand away he reeled
back in surprise. He wasn’t used to people biting back.

“
I don’t know
why we were worried, when you were here, celebrating?” she looked
around the bar, and then at him. “So Kieran? What is your
problem?”

“
Problem?” he
shrugged. How much time did she have?

“
It’s not
like you to shirk your responsibilities like that. That’s more
a
me
thing.” She
smiled at Raoul who handed her the coffee. “Thanks
Raoul.”

Her wasn’t sure why he
bristled at the innocent way she spoke to the other man. She was
his pretend girlfriend, so there was no need for him to get pretend
jealous by any overtures the other man made to her.

He took a large sip of
coffee and sputtered. “You’re trying to kill me? This is
boiling.”

“
Oh, sorry,
did I forget to mention that? The coffee is hot.” Ash handed him a
napkin to mop up the splatter on his lip. “So, what is your problem
and don’t tell me it’s nothing. I want to know why you walked out
today.”

Kieran looked at the
coffee stained napkin in his hand and shook his head. “It’s
complicated.”

Ash took a cautious sip
of coffee. “I know the terms of our deal. It’s very clear that we
focus on what we’re meant to do to get out of this as quick as
possible. If we do this right, your dad has his operation and when
he is ready to come back to the clinic, you leave this place and go
back to your perfect life. Uncomplicate it so we can do this as a
team.”

The coffee had to be
firing up his synapses or she was beginning to make sense where
there was none. “Me, agreeing to work in the clinic was a bad idea.
I am not cut out for that kind of work. Today proves
it.”

Her lower lip quivered
and she reached over to pull the glass of lemon and lime bitters
with ice closer. After swirling around the straw so that the ice
tinkled she hitched a breath and faced him. “I did read that
article in Time magazine. I also read about what happened to your
friend.” Her hand felt warm on his and although his fingers curled
tight, he didn’t remove his hand from under hers.

His throat felt tight as
she moved in closer. He wasn’t sure when his hand flipped over and
took hold of hers, or when he pulled her closer so he could hear
her amongst the noise in the bar, yet the moment her lips parted,
he knew trouble was calling.

He ran his thumb over her
soft skin. When she massaged his palm, he didn’t remember what they
were discussing. Maybe he could remember but somehow it wasn’t
important.

“
Kieran?” She
wouldn’t let it go.

“
When we were
growing up, Latha, Johnny and I did everything together. We were
the Indian version of the Three Musketeers. Latha and Johnny were
going to be married, have children. They were soul mates. If you
believed in that.” The breath he took hurt as the differences
between them became clearer. “But you don’t believe in the happily
ever after, do you?” He didn’t want to talk about this. Not now,
not here and not with Ash.

“
It’s okay
Kieran.” The pressure from her hand was a little firm and he looked
down. The Henna tattoo on her palm was fading. Her nails were long
and she had on nail art.

She was so different from
Latha. Why would he think she would understand any of what they had
gone through? She was a frivolous creature who enjoyed life and
didn’t think of the consequences. She wouldn’t know what commitment
was, if it hit her on that beautiful exotic smelling head of hers.
Who had hair that smelt like blossoms and orchids
anyway?

She would never
understand how it felt to lose Johnny. To be unable to save him.
For her a conscience would be the name of an exotic holiday
location.

The stabbing pain in his
chest made it difficult for him to take his next breath. “I need to
go to my room.”

“
Kieran, talk
to me. Please?” She didn’t let go of his hand.

He thought of Johnny and
the promise he made to him. The promise he couldn’t keep. Of all
the things his friend asked of him, why did he have to ask that?
Ash placed her other hand over his and his groin tightened with
such intensity that he was certain this was a test. Dammit. Was he
destined to make promises he was never going to keep?

He pulled out his wallet,
plucked out a wad of bills and threw it on the table. The person
standing outside would see a self-made man, who could buy anything.
Kieran’s gaze scanned the room and settled on Ash again. For a man
who could buy anything, he had nothing he wanted in his life,
because everything he needed was beyond reach. “Tomorrow we will go
to the hospital and meet my father.”

Those green eyes watched
him with curiosity. “Like a meet the parents date?” There was
mischief in her gaze.