Art Geeks and Prom Queens (11 page)

“Hey,” I say, nervously facing them.

“Hey,” says Kristi, while Kayla and Jen Jen look at the ground.

“What’s going on?” I ask.

“Well,” Kristi says, “I know you’re new and all, and I’m not sure how to say this, but you probably don’t want to be all friendly with Mason.” She gives me a hard look.

“Why? She seems really nice.” I mean, what could she possibly mean by that?

“Well, you’ve only known her for like a week, and we’ve known her for, like,
ever.
And let me tell you that she’s totally weird and disturbed.”

“Weird, how?” I ask, shifting my bag to my other shoulder, and looking at Kayla and Jen Jen who are very busy studying their cuticles.

“Just spooky, fucking freaky weird, okay?” Kristi says, rolling her eyes. “She wears weirdo used clothes, and sometimes I catch her—” she stops and looks around. “Watching us,” she whispers. “And it totally creeps me out.”

“Watching
you guys?
” I ask, ‘cause to be honest I find that hard to believe.

“Yes?
” she says, rolling her eyes. “She’s like a—what do you call those people that watch you all the time? Stalker?”

“Voyeur,” I say.

“Well, she’s a stalker-voyeur,” Kristi says, crossing her arms and narrowing her eyes.

“She’s like a total lesbo, too,” Kayla says, making a face and shivering.

“You guys are wrong. I know for a fact that she has a boyfriend. She’s not gay. But who cares if she was?” I add.

“That’s disgusting.” Jen Jen gives me a harsh look, as Kristi and Kayla shake their heads.

They’re all lined up like a Juicy Couture firing squad, giving me this awful death stare. And deep down inside I know I should just walk away, and totally blow them off, because what they’re saying is clearly wrong.

But instead, I just stand there. Because being friends with them is a really big deal. It guarantees a date for every dance, plans for every weekend, and the envy of everyone who doesn’t belong. I mean, if someone as perfect as Kristi wants to hang with me, then it must mean I have the potential to be perfect, too.

“Listen,” Kristi says, smiling. “I’m just telling you this for your own good. It’s hard to know who to hang with when you’re brand-new. We’re just trying to help you make the right choices before it’s too late.” Then she puts her arm around my shoulder and says, “Now let’s bail out of this psycho place and try on some makeup at the
real mall
.”

So after getting full-on makeovers at Sephora, Kristi pulls into my driveway and goes, “Are your parents home?”

I shake my head. “My dad’s in New York, and my mom’s probably with your mom at that yogalates studio.”

“Good, ‘cause I’m dying to check out your house.” She opens her car door and gets out.

“Okay.” I shrug. “But it’s not like there’s much to see. It’s mostly not decorated still.”

“That’s okay,” she says, rushing in front of me.

When I unlock the door she pushes ahead and walks deep into the empty living room. “Wow, how many square feet is this?” she asks, looking up at the ceiling.

Square feet? Is she kidding? But all I say is, “I don’t know.”

“How many bedrooms?” asks Kayla.

“Um, five?”

“How many baths?” asks Jen Jen.

“Um, six and a half?” I say, not entirely sure what half a bath is, but I overheard my mom mention it to someone else.

“This is really nice.” Kristi nods approvingly as she walks into the kitchen. “Sub-Zero fridge,” she says, running her hand over the front.

Okay, this is bizarre. Do kids in Newport really care this much about real estate?

“Let’s see your room,” Jen Jen says.

“It’s upstairs,” I say, motioning for them to follow.

“Wait.” Kristi looks at me. “Is there anything to drink?”

“Well, there’s some bottled water, and iced tea in the fridge.” I shrug.

“No, dummy. I mean, you know,
to drink?
”

“Like what?” I ask, watching her roll her eyes and open the fridge she was crushing on a moment ago.

“Like this,” she says, holding up a bottle of champagne and smiling.

“Oh, I don’t know. We probably shouldn’t drink that,” I say, thinking how my mom’s gonna kill me when she finds out.

“Please. They’ll never even notice.” She pops the cork and takes a swig from the bottle.

“Um, I can get us some glasses,” I offer.
God, I’m so lame.

“Nah, too much cleanup. Come on, let’s go check out your room,” she says, leading the way upstairs.

So we’re in my room and Kristi and I are lounging on my bed, Jen Jen is propped on some floor pillows near the window, and Kayla is spinning around in my desk chair and we’re all taking turns chugging from the bottle of champagne.

I’m feeling kind of tipsy ’cause it’s been a while since my last meal, and I’m not really used to drinking, but I’m trying to act all normal (well, cooler than my
usual
normal), since I’m really nervous about doing something stupid. Because even though they’re being really nice to me now, it still kinda feels like this is an audition and I’m just one dorky moment away from hearing. “Cut! Next!”

So I’m not really saying much because I’m just trying to concentrate on making sure I laugh at all the right moments, when Kristi reaches over to my mghtstand, and grabs the silver-framed picture of me, Paige, and Hud that was taken on my last day at my old school. We’re all in our school uniforms and Paige and Hud are on either side of me and they’re smiling, and I’ve got my arms around both of them and my eyes are kind of squinted closed because I was cracking up. I mean, even though it was my last day with them, I was still just happy to be there.

But Kristi takes one look at it, shakes her head, and goes, “Oh, my god! Geek alert! Don’t tell me that was your boyfriend!” She holds the picture up so Kayla and Jen Jen can see it and everyone starts cracking up.

I just sit there, nervously rubbing my arm, while everyone laughs at my two best friends. “You guys don’t know them,” I say, sounding more lame than forceful. “They’re actually really nice, cool people.”

“Nice? Maybe. Cool? Doubtful, Brazil, very doubtful,” Kristi says, placing the picture back on my nightstand, facedown. Then she looks at me and goes, “So if that’s your idea of hot, I can’t even imagine who you like at school.”

And without thinking twice I say, “Jas Klein is totally smokin’!” But while I’m nodding and smiling I notice everybody’s just sitting there, staring at me. So I take a small sip of champagne, and go, “Well kinda.”

And then Kristi, having completely lost her patience, shakes her head, sighs loudly, and says, “Listen Rio. I know you don’t get the whole social-ranking system, but let me just inform you that
everyone
knows Jas Klein is a total stoner and a big loser, and we can’t allow you to like him. I’m sorry, and I know that at first it might sound harsh, but that’s just the way it is, and it’s not like it’s my fault.” She looks at Jen Jen and Kayla for confirmation and they both nod. “We work really hard to set good examples for the rest of the school,” she continues. “We’re involved in every single activity that
matters.
And just because we’re totally sweet to
everyone
doesn’t mean we’re actually
friends
with all of them.” She leans toward me and rests her hand on mine. “We really like you and we all agree you definitely have potential.” She pauses and they all smile at me. “But if you’re gonna insist on hanging with stoners and dykes, then you can’t hang with us. I mean, you need to be aware of how your actions affect the group. That is, if you want to be part of our group.”

They’re all looking at me, waiting for a response, but I just sit there, staring at the carpet. Because even though I’m being given a second chance to pass on their friendship, the truth is that I do want to hang with them. I mean, even though they’re kind of phony, and definitely not nice to everyone like she just said, they
are
the leaders of the school—they know all the cool people and do all the cool stuff, and
I really want a piece of that, too. Partly because I’ve never had a shot at it before. But mostly because I don’t want to go back to being a nobody.

It’s like, before at my old school, I didn’t really care about being a big geek because I had two great friends, and we stuck together no matter what. I mean, yeah, there were definitely bad times like when the cool girls would “accidentally” spike the volleyball smack into my head during PE, or the time when Paige and I were voted number two and three on the “Ugliest Girls” list that was circulated around the entire eighth-grade class, or the countless times Hud had his hair “washed” in the school toilets. But even though I try not to think about that stuff, the truth is I couldn’t stand living through it again. And Kristi’s friendship insures that moments like those will never, ever happen to me. And without Paige and Hud to back me, it’s pretty much an offer I can’t refuse.

So if you hate me for my next statement, just imagine how I feel when I go, “Well, I think that Jeff Cole guy is cute.” I’m referring to the jock that threw the orange at us that day.

“We call him JC, and you’re right, he’s a total hottie,” says Kayla, nodding.

“Total,” says Jen Jen.

“And he’s great in bed.” Kristi looks right at me.

“Really?” I’m trying to act all casual, like I’m so used to having conversations like this.

“Just kidding,” she says, rolling her eyes.

“Well you did make out with him,” Jen Jen says, flipping through my pathetic CD collection.

“So?” Kristi says, getting up and opening the door to my walk-in closet. “Kayla’s the one that blew him.”

“Uh, hel-
lo
? That was like, a long time ago. When he was my boyfriend.” Kayla rolls her eyes, and inspects the ends of her blond-streaked hair.

“Oh, my god, I totally remember that party!” Jen Jen says, giving up on my CDs and cranking the radio instead.

“Do you guys have a lot of parties?” I ask, just to say something so they won’t forget I’m still here.

“Yeah, my mom and stepdaddy number two go away a lot,” Kristi says. “Because they trust me.” She laughs.

“Suckers,” Jen Jen says, getting up and dancing to an Outkast song in front of my full-length mirror.

“So you want to hook up with JC?” Kristi asks, taking my 7 jeans off the hanger and checking the size label. “ ‘Cause I can arrange it.”

“No!
” I say, a little louder than I would have liked. “I mean, no. Don’t say anything. If it’s gonna happen, then it will just happen, right? I mean, he probably doesn’t even like me.” I suddenly feel really nauseous.

“Please. Why wouldn’t he like you? You’re one of us now,” Kristi says, while Kayla and Jen Jen smile.

“Listen,” I say, clutching my stomach, “I didn’t say I wanted to, you know, hook up. I just said he was cute, that’s all.”

“Are you a virgin?” Kristi asks, turning away from my closet and staring at me.

My head feels all light and weird, and I know that this would probably be a really good time to lie. But I’m not sure I can fake my way through it, and I’m feeling pretty sick, so I just kind of shrug.

“Oh, my god!” Kristi shrieks. “I bet you’ve never even hooked up, have you?” She comes over, sits on the edge of the bed, and stares at me.

“What about in New York? Didn’t you guys hook up and stuff? I thought New York was supposed to be pretty wild,” Jen Jen says.

I shrug. “I didn’t really like anyone enough for that.” I take a sip from the bottle of water I keep on my nightstand, hoping it will make me feel better.

“Get real,” Kristi says. “You don’t have to
like
them, you just have to think they’re hot. Listen, I can totally set you up. My parents go out of town like every few weeks, and we just hang at my house and do whatever with whoever.”

“You mean you guys like,
all have sex together?
” I ask incredulously. Because
that
I want no part of.

“No, dummy. We mostly just hook up.”

“But don’t you want just one boyfriend?” I ask. “Like, just one special guy to share everything with?”

“Why would I want just one boyfriend? How boring is that?” She rolls her eyes. “Lighten up. If people were meant to be together forever, then everybody wouldn’t be getting divorced.”

“My parents are still together,” I say.

“Wait,” she says. “They’ll get over it.”

I don’t know if it’s the thought of my parents splitting up, fear of hooking up, or the fact that I am seriously messed-up on champagne. But suddenly, I jump up and bolt straight into my bathroom, where I barely make it to the toilet before I start vomiting over and over and over again.

And while Kayla rushes over to hold my hair back, Jen Jen grabs a washcloth, runs it under the tap then holds it against my forehead while I continue being sick. And right when I’m thinking how totally sweet they are for taking care of me like this, and how lucky I am to have such nice friends, Kristi goes, “God, Rio, that is seriously disgusting. But it’s probably for the best ‘cause you really eat a lot.”