As You Are (9 page)

“Dirty, dirty,” I mumbled.

“What the hell are you doing?” Danny asked as I jerked slightly, startled.

I was still on all fours with sponge in hand as I looked up at him in loose-fitting black gym shorts and a white wifebeater. The white drawstrings swayed slightly as they dangled down in front of my face, taunting me. I quickly glanced back down at the floor and continued wiping up the ashes. “Just wiping up a dirty, dirty mess.”

Danny bent over and pulled me up off the floor. “Well, go hop in the shower before the pizza gets here.”

I laughed a little as I looked at him. I could still hear “
take that cock, boy
” ringing in the back of my head. He shooed me off as he took the sponge and shook his head at me.

When I came out of my bedroom in a fresh white cotton T-shirt and boxers, Danny was at the front door paying the delivery driver. He'd already gathered up plates, napkins, and Parmesan cheese and stacked them neatly in the middle of the coffee table. There was also a small pile of Kisses and mini-peanut butter cups gathered on my side of the coffee table. I laughed as I made my way over to the window for a quick smoke.

“Are those my rations?” I peeked out the window down at the street below, half expecting to see the angry man I'd butt-burned still waiting there…shaking his fist at me and growling.

“Well, somebody has to save you from yourself,” he said disapprovingly. “I don't want you getting so fat that you can't wipe your own ass.”

I laughed and took a puff off my cancer stick as the mental picture of that scenario popped into my head. I became a little worried about why I found the image so humorous.

Danny placed the pizza box down and sat on the couch. He picked up the remote and turned on the TV. I took one last long toke and tossed the butt into the empty jar. The music began, and the previews started as I crossed the room. I sat down next to Danny and bent over the coffee table, placing pizza on a plate for him and one for myself before settling back into the sofa.

My gaze made a quick scan of the room, and I felt completely relaxed, the way one always feels after cleaning the house from top to bottom and knowing that everything is done. For once there were no little chores nagging at me in the back of my brain. I turned to look at Danny and began to laugh. He'd dragged half the cheese off his piece of pizza and was picking it off his chin.

After dinner we each settled into one another on the couch. We were sated after stuffing ourselves with greasy food. The simplicity of eating something so unhealthy fulfilled me in a sick way I'd probably never understand. I felt the heat from Danny's body radiating into my back as I leaned against him. I couldn't for the life of me think of anything I'd rather be doing.

I squirmed a little as he poked me in the side playfully. He knew I was ultraticklish and on more than one occasion used it to torture me into doing one thing or another. He folded his arm across my chest, and I rested my chin on it as I got lost in the movie, wondering if Anne and Gil were finally going to be together.

* * * * *

The credits began to roll, and I was feeling particularly satisfied with the ending. “That was really good.” I stopped myself, realizing I'd been absent mindedly caressing Danny's arm with my fingers.

“It was indeed,” Danny agreed.

I felt a little odd for a moment, like maybe Danny had taken notice that I'd stopped caressing his arm. I was way too hinked-out to look up at him. “I guess we should clean this up.” I felt the resistance from his arm when I started to lift my upper body, as if he'd hesitated. He pulled his arm away, and I went directly for the dishes. I felt his large hand on my back, and I nearly dropped everything.

“Here, Julian, I'll take those.” Danny stood up and held out his free hand for the dishes.

“All right.” I stood up and faced him, holding the plates for him to take. Danny leaned in and started to kiss me. My entire body went stiff as his lips made contact with mine. They were soft and warm, and as if by instinct, my mouth opened for his. I didn't know what the hell was going on.

When his tongue made its way into my mouth, I dropped the dishes onto the floor, luckily somehow missing our feet. They crashed, silverware clanking across the floor, and I felt Danny's hand slide over my ass. His thick lips were sucking, softly and sensually, as they pressed into mine, his tongue slowly moving in and out of my mouth.

His other hand found its way to my other ass cheek as I slid my hands over his hard-muscled shoulders. He seemed to take that as a sign and pulled me into his body, his mouth more forceful as his tongue waged war with mine. My entire brain buzzed and hummed as if in a trance. I was terrified my head might explode from the sensation of his fingers massaging and kneading my ass.

All the time I'd longed for and waited for this to happen and now, here it was…in living color with high-def clarity. His mouth was salty from the beer and pizza as I worked my hand onto the back of his head. His short, buzzed hair felt prickly and soft at the same time. I felt extremely light-headed as he continued to cover my mouth with his own. It was as if he were sucking the actual air out of my lungs. I thought I might suffocate, and I didn't fucking care.

Danny held me up as I lost the feeling in my legs for a moment, losing my balance. He pulled back, looking over my face. “You okay?”

I looked briefly into his glossed-over, sharp green eyes before covering his mouth with mine. I was apparently kissing him with a bit more force than I realized, since he stumbled back a step from my full-frontal assault. His arms roped around my waist once again as my senses overloaded. We were both beginning to sweat, and the taste of him, the woodsy scent from his soap, his natural musky-man smell—together they almost pushed me over the edge.

A pathetic, almost frantic whimper escaped from me as his hand moved over my hard-on. From that moment, it became a frenetic rush of pulling and yanking one another out of the few clothes we had on. I hopped up, wrapping my legs around his waist, and clung to his body like a spider monkey.

We continued to suck, lick, nip, and groan as we invaded each other's mouths. He was going for the bedroom, and I dug my teeth into his neck, biting and sucking as he moaned. I could feel his erection poking at my ass as he walked, feel his fingers probe lightly into me as his hands held me up against him by my ass.

“Jesus Christ,” he managed to breathe out as I licked up the side of his neck and began lightly nibbling and sucking his earlobe. “Julian…damn.”

Danny kicked open his bedroom door with his foot, and I said, “My room…please?” I couldn't stand the thought of being with him in his bed. I wanted to burn that bed.

He nodded, and I went for his lips again, sucking softly. Danny passed through the doorway and growled as he climbed onto my bed, finally sitting back on his ankles as we settled into one another. As we kissed, I could feel him opening me up with his hands. I groaned; the head of his cock pressed into me lightly. I pulled away and looked into his eyes as he lifted me a bit, before setting me down onto the bed.

I broke away, crawled over to the nightstand, and turned on the lamp. I felt his hand on my ass, poking and prodding at me with his fingers. My guy was definitely all about the ass, I thought, opening the drawer and retrieving a condom and lube. I let out a sharp yelp as one of Danny's damp, thick fingers pressed into me. I felt my eyes roll back into my head as my eyelids fluttered from the sensation. As much as I'd been looking forward to wrapping my lips around his dick, I was already conceding as I pushed back into his finger.

I sat up on my knees, spreading my legs a bit farther. Danny's free arm wrapped around my waist, and he pulled me toward him, thrusting his finger all the way inside me. I bit my lip as I tore open the condom, tossing the wrapper I-didn't-give-a-shit-where. He whispered a moan as I reached over and stroked his thick, hard cock. Danny placed his forehead onto the side of my head, and he fucked me with his finger as his hot breath blew into my ear. I heard him whisper my name again—Julian…not Julie.

“I want you,” Danny whispered in an almost haggard, husky voice.

I pushed him back, and he fell onto his ass. His finger slipped out of me. He looked at me with a half smile, and I thought I might die right there. That sexy smirk had done me in the first time I saw it.

I leaned over and took him into my mouth, then deep throated him. I felt Danny's entire body stiffen as I worked my lips up and down his shaft a few times. I removed my mouth, kissing the head before rolling the condom over his thick hard-on. I straddled him and squirted some lube into his hand; then I kissed him. I listened to the wet noises as he worked the lube over himself.

Danny tore his mouth away from mine and turned his head slightly, looking back as he scooted his body back so he could lean against the headboard. We locked eyes as I shimmied up his legs. He used his hand to steady his dick as I sat, taking in a sharp breath as the large head pressed into me. I relaxed as best I could, but my ass tried to resist the welcome invasion.

Danny cursed a deep moan from the pressure as I watched his head fall back into the leather headboard. His hands slid over my ass, massaging, and I yelped from the shot of pain as the head finally forced its way in. I slowly pressed my body down farther, taking him all the way in as he pounded the back of his head lightly into the headboard from the pleasure.

Danny finally looked back at me, and we kissed again. I began to work myself up and down his cock as we each moaned, taunting one another with our tongues. He ran a hand up my side and leaned in, taking a nipple into his mouth and pulling on it with his teeth.

I called out his name, beginning to pump myself a little faster on him. His hand wrapped around my hard-on and stroked as he moved over to the other nipple and began to torture it with his teeth and tongue. My entire body was on fire, and I could feel the wet heat build as I called out. Danny rubbed his thumb and finger over the head of my dick. I shot with a force I hadn't seen in years.

“Ah, baby…” he said, losing his words as he began to thrust up into me as I came down onto him. I covered his mouth with mine, muffling his screams as he came.

I kissed my way over to his ear as he continued to thrust and twitch. I whispered, “Danny, give me everything.”

He let out one last cry as his arms tightened around me, squeezing out any space that might come between us.

* * * * *

My eyelids fluttered open, and I felt a little chill from the cold. I was lying on my stomach. My last memory was Danny asking if I wanted anything as he turned off the bedside lamp to head for the kitchen. He'd run his hand gently over my lower back and ass—then nothing. I must have fallen asleep.

The sky was beginning to lighten, but the sun was by no means up. The clock said 5:32. I was freezing as I rolled over to see that Danny wasn't there. As I climbed under the covers, teeth chattering, it struck me as odd that he hadn't made me climb under the covers with him. I grumbled and closed my eyes, drifting back to sleep.

* * * * *

I sat up in the bed and looked around, confused. The dull ache in my backside confirmed that I hadn't merely dreamed it; the whole thing had happened. I smiled, able to recall the way it felt to have him inside of me. I looked out the window to see a light drizzle coming down. It was almost ten, and I was due to meet Gabby in a few hours. I threw the covers off and stopped, looking over at the far side of my bed. Had it not been slept in?

Shaking my head at the silliness of that thought, I bounced out of bed and stumbled through my sleepy-eyed haze into the living room. I panicked again momentarily looking at the spotless room, and then laughed as I noticed a fork poking out from under the sofa. It
had
actually happened. Danny and I had sex last night.

I ran my hand over my ass, grinning from ear to ear, and started to get hard remembering the way Danny's hands had felt on my body, his breath… The whole night had been more amazing than I'd ever imagined it could be. He seemed to have wanted me as desperately as I did him.

I spied my ciggies on the ledge and then looked toward the kitchen, thinking about the ice-cold cans of caffeine-infused Diet Coke in the fridge. Then, feeling my bladder begging for relief, I crossed my legs. I giggled, much as I had as a kid, and went back into my room to yank on a pair of loose-fitting boxers.
Can't be flashing the neighbors.

I moved briskly then, wasting no time getting out of my room and straight into the bathroom. I relieved myself, complete with pee shiver and a long moan of relief before heading into the kitchen. I lifted the can of soda out of the fridge, all silver and sparkly, and held it up as if I were Indiana Jones and had just discovered a priceless artifact. I held the can close to my ear as I popped the top, listened to the
click
, followed by the hiss of air, and finally to the fizzing of bubbly goodness that waited inside. My mouth watered as I licked my lips. I took a good long drink:
sweet nectar of the gods.

I danced my way up to the front window and opened it, inhaling that fresh, rainy scent from the air.
Everything's better after Danny-sex
. I felt like Peter Parker having just been bitten by the radioactive spider—all my senses were heightened. I laughed out loud as I seriously considered trying to climb up the side of the building for a moment.

I hummed as I pulled a smoke out and lit it, then fell onto my knees. I rested my elbows on the window ledge and sighed.
Life is grrrreat!
I took a long toke off my cigarette and exhaled. Still, the thought nagged at me that my bed looked as if I'd been the only one who'd slept in it.

“Puh-lease.” I inhaled another puff and reminded myself that this was the happiest morning of my life. I exhaled and scolded myself sternly. I would not allow
me
to ruin my morning. I shook that line of thinking from my head and quickly tossed the smoke into my jar.

I leaped up onto my feet and marched straight to Danny's bedroom. The door was cracked, so I pushed it open. The bed hadn't been slept in…although he could've made it before leaving to go to the gym.

This was just stupid. He'd slept in my bed with me. He had to have. Perhaps he just slept so soundly that he hadn't rooted around much. Maybe that's why the other side of the bed looked so neat. I took another quick swig from the soda can and went back into my room. The pillows on that side of the bed hadn't been smushed, but maybe that didn't mean anything. Maybe Danny had passed out much the same way I had.