Asenath (24 page)

"Fancy seeing you here."

I looked. It was Khasekh. Only now he was not Khasekh but Menah, the playful village boy, the hero of children's games and my best friend.

I smiled fondly at him. "Doesn't this place remind you of our village home?"

"It sure does."

He sat down beside me. A butterfly with a blue and yellow pattern flew by. He reached out to touch it but it darted away.

"Look, I even found what Mama used to call the 'shy plant,'" I said.

"Ah, the one that closes up when you touch it?"

"Yes. Here's another one." I gestured to it.

He touched it. We watched in fascination as the leaves folded up.

He sighed wistfully. "So many memories." He rested his head against a massive tree trunk. "Do you remember this one time when I sneaked us both out of the village? I think I was in trouble, or you were."

"Most likely it was you," I teased.

He gave me a mock angry look. "Well, whatever the reason, I had us escape. We went to this really far remote place and went for a swim. We had a race, trying to reach some hippos when a crocodile appeared. We almost got eaten, but our fathers arrived just in time. Remember that?"

"Ah, yes." I hadn't thought of that incident in years. "I remember."

A lump rose in my throat.

"Are you all right, Asenath?" Khasekh asked softly.

I looked at him, seeing little Menah running alongside the river, pelting the village children with mud balls.

"Yes. It's just that..." My voice grew choked.

"Shhh." He put an arm around me.

"Can you see it?" I whispered.

"See what?"

"The little village. Mama. Papa."

"Yes I can. They are so proud of you. I know I'm proud of you too."

Khasekh leaned over and embraced me lightly. He placed a kiss beside my lips.

And drew back to reveal a sight that was like a slap on the face.

Joseph was there.

The hurt on his face was unmistakable. He stared at us for a moment, then whipped around and stalked off.

I gawked after him, too shocked to move at first. Then I leapt to my feet. "Joseph!" I ran to the edge of the jungle.

Alas, he had disappeared.

"
Yosef
, is it?" Khasekh said.

I turned around.

He was grinning, his arms folded in front of his chest.

Then he laughed. It was not a laugh I had heard from him before. It was a laugh that slashed at me like a sword.

"You think this was an accident, Asenath? It was not." He slowly headed toward me.

My blood ran cold. "What do you mean? Khasekh, what are you saying?"

He encircled me like a lion cornering its prey. "I planned it all out, Asenath. But even if your father hadn't told me, I would have found out sooner or later. After all, even a blind man can see how you feel about...
the vizier
."

I stared at him in horror.

He smiled, a smile so much like Lady Zalikha's. "I heard about everything. Your meetings, your gifts, even your
rendezvous
in Pharaoh's garden. And of course, last night,
everyone
saw you ogling him."

His face darkened. He spat to the ground. "That cursed vizier. He took everything that was rightly mine."

"What do you mean?" I asked in a small voice.

"Using some sheepherder's hocus-pocus on Pharaoh. He took everything from me. So now, I take what
he
wants most."

It became clear to me. My best friend was no longer there. He had died. The man before me had an ambition like a sandstorm. It would destroy anything and
anyone
who got in its way.

Khasekh grinned at me with the serpent's grin, then strode off.

I did not know what to think. I did not know what to do. I did not know anything anymore.

Except that my life was now over.

I spent the remainder of the trip inside my tent, my only companions the memories of Joseph's pained face and Khasekh's malignant laughter.

On the last night, Nafre came to my room. "My lady, a messenger of Pharaoh wishes to have a word with you."

A choking dread came over me. I nearly declined. Alas, I knew I could not. "Send him in."

I felt like I was pronouncing my own death sentence.

The messenger came in and bowed. "My lady, your presence is requested at dinner tonight."

"Thank you."

I had no doubt everyone was going to turn on me for betraying our beloved vizier. For the first time in many years, I once again felt like a small girl cowering before Lady Zalikha.

That night, I braced myself for the castigations that were soon to follow. I put on a face of stony dignity, a poor cover-up for my now ruined reputation, then approached the party.

To my surprise, no one attacked me, let alone paid attention to me. Still, I felt the tension in the air, which hung thickly like a muggy summer's heat.

I chose a spot far away from both Joseph and Khasekh. Joseph was talking with some nobles and did not seem to notice me. Khasekh, on the other hand, sat alone and glowered at me from across the circle. He looked like he wanted to murder me. It really would have been better if he had. There was nothing to live for anymore.

I ate quickly and hurried back to my tent. But to my dismay, on the way back, I ran into Joseph. His face was cold and dark, like the twins' tomb. I gave him a quick bow before rushing off.

Later as I lay brooding in the dark I realised the world had become deathly quiet. Driven by some strange impulse, I got up and drew back the tent flap. Everything was shrouded in a chilly blackness, save for a faint moonbeam drifting across the ground.

I stepped outside and looked up at the stars. There seemed to be more here than in the city. Much more.

For a while, I found comfort in their beauty. Then I remembered another night not long ago―one in Pharaoh's garden―and the reality struck me violently.

I made my way out of the camp and wandered around aimlessly in the gloomy night. Soon, I found myself on the edge of a cliff, overlooking a darkened wilderness. Far below, the Nile was a shimmering silver thread. A freezing wind whipped at me, as if punishing me.

I reached into my pocket. I drew out the one thing I had guarded with my life all these years.

The lapis lazuli lotus necklace.

I extended my hand over the cliff. My fingers loosened their grip.

Then they stopped.

I could not let go of this.

It was all I had left.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Back in Thebes I had no choice but to go on with my life as if nothing had happened. On my first day back, I was annoyed to step outside and see the sun shining brightly. It seemed to mock me with a cruel irony.

I was tired all the time yet I could not get enough sleep. Even the simplest of tasks, such as going up the stairs, drained me.

A couple of days later, I decided to resign from my tutoring role. It just was not worth it. Nothing was worth it anymore.

I also knew I had to leave Thebes. Where I would go, I did not know. But certainly, I could not return to Heliopolis.

The following day, as the servants tidied after classes, I prepared to inform my royal mistress of my resignation. I went over to a mirror to check myself.

I looked terrible. My skin was sunken and sallow. There were dark circles under my eyes. Earlier, Princess Hatshepsut had asked, "Lady Senat, did you cry last night?"

"No, your Highness. I, uh, just slept very late," I had replied as tears crept to my eyes.

My head throbbed, nearly bursting. I rubbed my temple. Just as I turned to leave the room, Pharaoh Tuthmosis appeared in the doorway.

I stared at him, shocked, even though I knew that was the improper thing to do. The king had never dropped by before, never visited our classes.

"Lady Asenath." His voice was icy and commanding. "Dismiss your servants."

I nodded to my servants. As they filed out, I remembered myself. I awkwardly dropped to the floor.

"Life, health and prosperity to you, Majesty." My tongue nearly stumbled over the words. "O Pharaoh, Living Horus, Son of the Sun, may you live forever."

"Arise."

I rose to see the king heading toward me. His large painted eyes bore into me. "How have the day's classes been?" he asked.

"Uh, good. Very good, Majesty."

"Do you like what you're doing, this role of royal tutor?"

"Yes, Majesty." I would have to postpone meeting with the Queen for a while.

"That is good. Anyhow, there is someone I wish to introduce to you." He clapped his hands.

Joseph appeared in the doorway.

Only proper decorum prevented me from bolting out of the room. I dropped to my knees once more, feeling sharp chills lash across my skin.

After stuttering out the traditional greetings, I heard one thing.

Cold, gnawing silence.

Gentle hands circled my arms and helped me up. I lifted my face to see Joseph's magical eyes, the hazel-olive hues blending together like watery ripples.

Behind him, Pharaoh had become a tiny figure in the distance. He disappeared out the door, leaving Joseph and I completely alone.

Joseph gazed at me, practically touching me with his eyes. Then he gave me a wan smile.

I could not bear it any longer. "Your Excellency, I know you must feel ill toward me. I know I have no proof, but―"

"What's this?" Joseph gently interrupted.

I followed his gaze to a stray papyrus sheet lying on the ground. "It must be one of the children's. We did some drawing earlier this morning."

Joseph released my arms, walked over to the sheet and picked it up. He studied it. A smile broke out across his face. "Isn't this lovely? And so true too."

He handed me the sheet. I took it.

Princess Hatshepsut's name was scrawled at the top in childish hieroglyphs. Below it was a drawing of a man and a woman with their arms stretched out toward each other as if locked in a stiff embrace.

At first, I thought she had drawn her parents. Until I saw the clumsily sketched cartouches beside the characters.

Beside the man was the name
Lord Zapanah
. Beside the woman,
Lady Senat
.

"Children are much wiser than we give them credit for, don't you think?" Joseph said.

I lowered my eyes, not knowing what I could possibly say.

"Asenath." His voice was now soft. "Look at me."

Still looking down, I shook my head.

"Look at me." He took my face into his hands and slowly lifted it.

Our eyes met.

"I know what happened," he said. "Khasekh confessed to me everything. But even if he hadn't, I know it would not have been in you to do that. I know you better, far better than you think."

I found my voice. "My lord, I never in my life would dream of hurting you. I know you have been hurt enough. I know I cannot prove this, but―"

"I believe you, Asenath. Do you know why?"

"Why, my lord?"

"You remember I told you that I first came to Egypt as a slave?"

"Yes."

"It was a very difficult time for me, needless to say. I was starved, beaten and bruised. However, I am not bitter about what happened. During those dark days, there was one shining moment that I will never forget. One morning I awoke to a fever so bad I could barely stand. I tried to endure it. But when I was brought out to the slave auction in the marketplace, I finally collapsed. The slaves around me did nothing. The slave trader cared not for any life. It was the lowest point of my life. I felt beneath human. I begged God to let me die. But suddenly, a little girl came up to me and gave me a drink of water. Not long after, she was chased away. Still, no matter how brief a time it had been, her kindness nourished me. I asked God to watch over that little girl always."

Joseph paused for a moment. "I heard someone call her name.
Kiya
."

Even up to now, I can never find the words to describe that moment. All I can say is that my whole life―my past, present and future―were transformed completely.

I was now a new person. I was neither Asenath nor Kiya. I was
both
Asenath and Kiya. Though there was no longer a trace of the little village girl, she was still very much alive, frolicking underneath a veil of kohl eye paint and fine linen.

I now remembered it all.

His face had been covered in dirt so I could barely make out his features. But those eyes.

They enchanted me once. They enchanted me still. And they would never stop working their loving magic.

I pulled back. I rested my head in my hands, trying to absorb this, embrace this.

Joseph put an arm around me and drew me close. "Years Later, when I was in Potiphar's house," he said. "I had a dream. I was floating in the skies when a woman appeared before me. Though I could not see her face, I knew I loved her with all my heart. I took her hand. We flew up together into the heavens. Then the voice of God said,
'Joseph, know that on earth there has been born a baby whose destiny will intertwine with yours. That baby has since grown into a beautiful young woman. When she comes, I will tell you. So listen closely.'"

"What happened next?"

"Sometime after that, I grew busy with my master and mistress' Opet celebrations. One night, I was rushing about, supervising a dinner when I

heard God say,
'Joseph, look over there. Remember her?'
I looked. It seemed the world came to a halt. It had been many years, but I recognised you right away. I was astounded too that the little girl who had once helped me had grown into such a lovely woman. Your beauty was unlike any other I had ever seen, pure and serene. You had a smile that lit up the entire room. You were, and still are, a precious jewel."

Joseph's grip on me tightened. I pressed closer to him. The weight of this crushed me, but a beautiful and precious weight it was, like a newborn baby.

"The following day," he said, "when I saw you weeping, my heart broke. I wanted nothing more than to reach out to you and save you. You looked so helpless and alone. I knew you would hurt yourself if no one came to help you."