Ashes of Roses (Tales of the Latter Kingdoms Book 4) (12 page)

Then I saw him, sitting straight in the saddle, his head bare and his dark hair gleaming in the sun. He wore a plain doublet of very dark green, and high brown boots and gloves to match. Even from that distance, I could sense his gaze fastening on me, and he smiled, teeth flashing as he raised his hand.

I gave Maelyn a gentle nudge with my knees, and she picked her way carefully through the crowd, somehow managing to sidle up to the Emperor’s great black stallion without actually bumping into any of the other horses. Several of the young women astride those horses shot me annoyed glances, but they knew better than to say anything when it had become increasingly clear that His Majesty had extended me some special favor.

“Good afternoon, Ashara,” he said, and ran an appraising eye over the blood-bay mare I rode. “Your aunt is obviously a good judge of horseflesh, if that is the mount she chose for you to ride.”

“She does have exquisite taste, Your Majesty,” I allowed, reaching up to stroke Maelyn’s neck. “I daresay my own father had no better horse in his stables.”

“Now I see why you were so confident at dinner last night.” He smiled at me, and it was as if the sun had doubled in intensity. I felt a rush of heat go over me that had very little to do with the warmth of the afternoon.

Somehow I managed to keep my tone light as I replied, “As to that, I suppose we will just have to see, Your Majesty.”

He laughed then and gestured for the same tall, dignified man I had met last night, whom Gabrinne had identified as Lord Hein, to approach. “Are we all more or less assembled?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. All those who said they would ride are accounted for, and so we may commence at your pleasure.”

“It pleases me that we start now,” the Emperor said, and his gaze slid sideways toward me before he looked back at his seneschal.

Lord Hein bowed. “Of course, Your Majesty.”

I heard several shouted commands then, although I could not make out what they were. However, the guards interspersed with the young women and the nobles seemed to fan out and take positions where they were evenly spaced amongst everyone else, and then the conversation died off as a great pack of noisy dogs was brought out, straining at their leashes. A horn sounded, and the hounds were let loose, baying and barking as they charged into the forest.

My father had not been a great hunter — and we did not have the wealth to support a stable of horses and hounds — but I knew enough about the process that what happened next wasn’t entirely unexpected. The great throng of horses, which had been standing placidly only a few seconds earlier, now leapt forward, a straining mass of horseflesh following the dogs into the trees.

Thank goodness Maelyn seemed to know exactly what to do, and she surged into the woods with the rest of them, her pace picking up with no signal from me. The Emperor on his black stallion was just a few yards ahead of me, and I signaled my own mount that she should follow them. Without hesitation she shifted the direction in which she was running so we were nearly in a straight line, the space between us closing fast. I had no idea whether any of the other riders’ horses were as good as ours, or whether they purposely hung back so they would not be seen besting the Emperor, but for whatever reason, it seemed the gap between the two of us and the rest of the group was slowly but steadily growing.

Even the guards appeared to be falling behind, much to their consternation. I heard one or two desperate cries of “Your Majesty!”, but the Emperor affected not to hear them. Indeed, he turned and looked over his shoulder at me, then grinned, his teeth seeming very white in the relative gloom of the forest. He said nothing, but that glance told me everything.

So you want a race?
I thought.
Then you shall have one.

I flapped the reins against Maelynn’s neck and felt the powerful muscles beneath me push forward with a burst of speed that brought us nearly neck and neck with the Emperor’s stallion. Odd how it seemed that my muscles recalled exactly what to do — how to balance myself in the sidesaddle, to lean into my horse’s stride, becoming one with it.

A stream meandered across our path, and the Emperor’s horse sailed directly over it. I felt Maelyn tense for the jump, and I caught my breath, wondering if I could still maintain my seat through it all. It had been a very long time since I had ridden at all, let alone jumped over the low hedgerows on my father’s estate.

But then Maelyn’s leap was over so quickly I hardly had time to think about it, and we were tearing down a narrow track, so narrow that once or twice I felt a tree branch scrape against my shoulder, or my leg. And all the while the sounds of the other riders and the belling of the hounds grew fainter and fainter, until at last the Emperor and I might have been the only ones riding through these woods.

Because the track was so cramped, I let Maelyn fall behind. It was impossible for two to ride abreast here. After a few more minutes, however, we emerged into a clearing, and I leaned forward and whispered, “Now, Maelyn.”

She bolted forward, hooves tearing at the dead leaves and dry grass underfoot, and we shot ahead of the Emperor and his horse, thundering to the other side of the glade, where I pulled her to a stop and patted her heaving sides.

“I believe that makes me the winner, Your Majesty,” I called out as he came to a halt a few paces away.

“So it does, Ashara.” He did not seem disappointed that I had bested him; indeed, he smiled as he dismounted and came forward, extending a hand to me.

Of course I could not refuse it, so I wrapped my fingers around his and allowed him to help me down from the saddle. “Thank you, Your Majesty.”

“Torric,” he said.

Those dark eyes seemed to be searing into me, and were far too close. I looked away, instead staring down at the muddy earth. “I could not,” I murmured.

“Even if I command it?”

I glanced up then, forced myself to meet his gaze. “So you command me to not address you as my Emperor?”

“If that is what it takes, yes.” He still held my hand, and I felt his fingers tighten around mine. “Please.”

This request shocked me so — who had ever heard of the Emperor saying “please” to anyone? — that I said, “Very well…Torric.”

The smile returned. “Ah, that is better. What use for such formalities, when it is just the two of us here?”

I had to concede that he had a point. “So do you often do things like this?”

“Like what? Run off into the woods with a beautiful woman?”

Heat flared in my cheeks, but somehow I made myself hold his gaze, and not stammer and stare down at my feet as I wished to do. “Well, not precisely that, but a little. That is, do you often go tearing off and leave your guards behind? I must say they sounded quite worried.”

Some of the light went out of his eyes, but his tone was casual enough as he said, “Ah, I wish it were so, but no — they dog my steps every minute of my life. This is a blessed respite.”

I caught the note of weariness in his voice, and wondered at it. Then again, I had very little idea of what an emperor’s life was like. He had just given me a glimpse that perhaps it wasn’t quite as rosy as I had thought it might be. “And you have no fear, being out here without their protection? After all, I assume you must have guards for a reason.”

He shook his head and chuckled. “I have ridden in these woods since I was a boy. There is nothing here to harm us, for all the bears and wolves were driven to wilder places long ago. And if I have aught to fear from my fellow man, well, then, let them come.” His hand strayed to his hip, and for the first time I noticed that he wore a long knife — or perhaps it was a short sword — in a scabbard of finely tooled leather hanging from his belt.

Whether he had meant his words to hearten me, I did not know. I must confess that the sight of that knife was not particularly encouraging, and I hoped he would have no cause to use it. “Do you think they will find us soon?” I asked.

An offhand shrug. “I do not know. If they give my scent to the hounds, in time they will come here. But they will have to divert them from their present quarry for that to work, and that may take some time.” His eyebrows lifted, and those dark eyes were intent on my face, as if seeking to read my very thoughts from my expression. “Why? Do you wish for them to find us?”

Oh, I had no good answer to that question! For while some part of me trembled to be alone with him like this, a far greater part was very glad to be here, to stand in this glade with the rustle of the leaves around us, and the gentle touch of the wind on our faces, and the sounds of distant birdsong. We might have been the only two people in the world.

“No,” I said at last. “I must confess I do not.”

There was something very beautiful about his smiles, something more than the way they revealed his straight white teeth and crinkled at the corners of his eyes. For some reason I thought he did not often have occasion to smile like this, joyously and with no care as to what anyone around him might be thinking. “That gladdens me, Ashara. It is so difficult to say what is truly on one’s mind when surrounded by so many people, don’t you think?”

With that statement I could most heartily agree. “Oh, yes. Indeed, sometimes I wonder how you must bear it, to live so much in the public’s eye.”

Almost as soon as the words left my mouth, I wished I could take them back. His expression darkened, and the finely sculpted lips compressed somewhat. Then he shook his head and said in a low voice, “Could
you
bear it, Ashara?”

“Could I — I am not sure what you mean,” I faltered, although I thought I did, and the idea thrilled me and frightened me at the same time.

He took my hands in his, and I almost fancied I could feel the heat of his flesh through the thin kidskin that covered both our fingers. “Could you bear that scrutiny, to live your life as the highest lady in Sirlende, knowing all eyes would be upon you at all times? For that is what it means to be Empress.”

This was all too sudden. A wave of faintness washed over me, and I pulled my hands from his, stumbling over a tree root as I tried to back away. At once his arm was around my waist, supporting me, strong and sturdy.

“It frightens you,” he said flatly.

“No,” I protested. “That is — this is all so sudden. We only met the day before last, and have had very little opportunity to speak to one another. And now you are saying — ” I broke off and shook my head. At the same time, though, I realized that I had made no attempt to pull away from him, that he held me now more intimately than anyone ever had before.

“I am saying I have chosen you, Ashara. Oh, I will go on with this farce, because the wheels have been set in motion and it will be too difficult to stop them, but know now that I have eyes for no one but you. And I knew this from the first time I saw you.” His dark eyes were keen, studying me, and he added, “Tell me now if you do not feel the same way. I can think of no one else I would rather have as my wife, but I am not some tyrant of old, forcing an unwilling woman to his bed.”

Unwilling? I let out a quavering sort of laugh and shook my head. “No, Torric, it is not that I do not feel the same way. To be honest, I do not know what I feel. I cannot stop thinking of you, of the way your lashes almost hide your eyes when you smile, the sound of your laugh — everything. I thought these were just the foolish fancies of a young woman, that you could not possibly be thinking of me, that you would of course want someone far grander for Empress, that — ”

And I could go no further, for he pulled me to him then, his mouth on mine, the taste and feel and scent of him filling the entire world. I had not thought how real a man could be, how solid and strong, how I would open my mouth to his and feel our bodies press together, how a sudden unexpected heat would flood along every vein so that I could do nothing but cling to him and pray that this bliss would never end.

It did, of course, but long moments afterward. He pulled away just far enough for me to catch my breath. One hand reached up to brush a stray strand of hair away from my face; it must have come loose during our headlong gallop through the woods.

“Does that mean yes?” he asked. The words were soft, spoken barely above a murmur, but I thought I saw a glint of amusement in his eyes.

“Yes,” I said. “Oh, yes. But — for you. Because of you. Not because I want to be Empress. The thought rather terrifies me, to be honest. But I would have fallen in love with you if I had seen you on the street, driving a cart of vegetables to market.”

At that remark he actually tilted his head back and laughed, a good hearty laugh that seemed to echo through the forest. “Ah, that paints a pretty picture. I can only imagine what my mother would say if she overheard such a comment.”

I recalled the icily beautiful woman with the sharp tongue at the dinner table and tried not to shiver. The Dowager Empress was certainly not a very congenial woman. It seemed I would be trading my harpy of a stepmother for a mother-in-law who was equally intimidating, but I would not allow that to deter me. I thought I could put up with a good deal if it meant I would have Torric.

Besides, the palace was very large. How difficult could it be to avoid her whenever possible?

“I would think she’d be happy to know that I want you for you, and not because of the position such a match would give me.”

“‘Happy’ and my mother are not two things that go together very often.” His expression sobered. “In fact, I believe she would not even understand such a sentiment, for she has come to believe that the only reason for a marriage is to advance oneself.”

“She did — she did not love the late Emperor?” It felt odd to ask such an intimate question, but after all, Torric and I had just shared our own intimacy, and I had agreed to be his wife. Surely there should be no secrets between us.

Well, save the one I must keep, on pain of death.

“Gods, no. It was a match made for politics, as these things always are.” Torric frowned and turned away from me slightly, seeming to stare at the horses, who had taken advantage of our wandering attention and had begun to graze on the dry autumn grass. “I think he tried to care for her — my father was a man of great good humor, whatever else one might say about him — and he did not wish for any discord in his household. But she had loved someone else, and had the match denied her, and so she forever closed her heart to him. And to my sister and me as well, I think. She could not look at us without seeing him, you know, and it kept her from forming a mother’s attachment.”