At Peace (23 page)

Then I remembered that Keira asked me a
question so I answered her. “I don’t know, baby, what do you
want?”

“Fried chicken,” she answered.

“That takes marinating,” I informed her of
something she already knew.

“
No, I mean
Kentucky
Fried Chicken, not Momalicious Fried Chicken.” She
grinned and leaned a hip on the counter. “After a hard day at the
garden center, I wouldn’t make my fabulous mother cook fried
chicken.”

Oh shit, she wanted something.

I crossed my arms on my chest and looked at
my daughter.

“All right, gorgeous, what do you want?”

She put her hand to her chest. “Moi?”

“Spill.”

“Just fried chicken,” she told me then smiled
wickedly. “And a cut-rate American Husky doggie that’s cute, white
and super fluffy.”

The dog. The damned dog. Since the barbeque
all she could talk about was the two hundred dollar dog.

“We’ll talk about the dog later.”

“Mom!” she leaned into me. “The weeks are
sliding by. They only have five puppies and they’ve already sold
three.”

“Give me more time to think.”

“I can’t!”

“You can.”

“Mom –”

“Keira.”

We locked eyes and I knew I’d win, I
always did. Keira had the patience of a gnat. In no time, she
huffed and stomped a foot then started out of the
kitchen.

“Hey,” I called after her as the phone
started ringing. “Why’s Kate goin’ to Joe’s?”

“Dunno!” Keira called back and I grabbed the
phone.

“Hello?”

“Hey babe, get your ass down to J&J’s
tonight,” Cheryl said in my ear. “I’m off and since your
hot-as-shit, bad boy, player, next door neighbor is off limits and
I’m feelin’ a hankerin’ for some man company, I need someone to go
on the prowl with me.”

Since the barbeque Cheryl had started to call
me daily. I knew why. One, she was a nice person. Two, she liked
me. Three, she knew it sucked my husband died and thought I needed
a friend. Four, she knew it sucked that Joe had played me and
thought I needed a friend. Five, she knew it sucked that Daniel
Hart was messing with my head and thought I needed a friend. And
six, she didn’t have a lot of friends and even I knew I was a good
one, she obviously guessed I was, so she wanted me to be her
friend.

Feb had told me the day after the barbeque
that Cheryl had asked for my number and Feb asked if it was okay if
she gave it to her. I said yes and since then every day she’d
called.

“Cheryl –”

“Not that you’d be my first choice seein’ as
you’re hot too, so you might cut into my action, but Colt’s workin’
so Feb’s home with the kid. Jessie’s a fuckin’ loon and she scares
me a little. Mimi’s got kids and Al’s out with his buds tonight so
she’s in. Dee’s workin’ so she’s out and I got a night off and a
babysitter so it has to be you and it has to be tonight.”

“Cheryl, there’s something I haven’t told
you,” I said, grabbing a soda from the fridge and heading to my
bedroom, opening it with a pop and fizz.

“What?” Cheryl asked.

“
Hang on, I need to get to my room,” I said
quietly, even though there was music coming from Keira’s room,
another boy band playing so she probably couldn’t hear me but you
couldn’t be too careful.

“
Ooo
, juicy if the girls can’t hear,” Cheryl said into my
ear.

I closed the door to my room, took a drink
from my pop and sat on my bed.

“It’s about Joe.”

“Your hot-as-shit, bad boy, player, next door
neighbor?”

I grinned at the phone. “Yeah, him.”

“What about him?”

“
Well…” I hesitated, “it’s back
on.”

“
What?
” Cheryl yelled.

“Um…”

“How long?”

“What?”

“How long’s it been back on?” Cheryl was
getting crotchety with impatience.

“Since the night of the barbeque.”

She was quiet a moment then slowly, she said,
“You. Are. Shittin’. Me.”

“No.”

There was a pause then a shrieked,
“
Why haven’t
you told me?
”

“I was, um… he went out of town and I wasn’t
sure that, um… when he got back that we’d still…”

“Is he back?”

“He got back yesterday.”

“Are you still –?”

“Yeah.”

“I knew it.”

“You did?”

“Girl, a man does not get like he got when
those flowers were delivered when it’s nothin’ but a convenient
next door booty call.”

“It’s still a booty call.”

“Bullshit.”

“No, he made that clear. It’s just sex.”

I heard a “poof” sound of expelled breath
over the phone then, “Yeah, right.”

“Colt got intense when the flowers were
delivered too,” I reminded her.

“Yeah, Colt also had the asshole of all
assholes doing sick fuck crazy ass shit to him and Feb for twenty
freakin’ years so he knows your pain like no other.”

Cheryl did too, she was involved in that mess
as well, not for twenty years but also not in a good way, not that
there was a good way in that mess, except maybe the fact that the
crazy guy ended up being riddled with bullets. She’d told me all
about it a couple of nights ago. I’d been astonished that she’d
pulled it together so fast. It had been over a year ago, but still,
she was right. It was “sick fuck crazy ass shit” and she made it to
the other side.

Then again, Cheryl had shared other stuff in
her life so I got the firm impression she was a fighter.

“Your hot-as-shit, bad boy, player, next door
neighbor doesn’t know your pain,” Cheryl went on in my ear. “He’s
just goin’ all alpha male when someone fucks with his woman.”

My heart lurched and I whispered, “I’m not
Joe’s woman.”

“
Babe, seriously? Wake
up
.”

“I’m not.”

“
All right,” she said, “tell me, how are
you not?”

“Well, he hasn’t asked me out on a date,” I
started.

“He fuck you?”

“Um… yeah.”

“That’s a date to a guy,” she declared.
“Next.”

I started giggling. “Cheryl, really, he’s
made no promises.”

“They never do.”

“Tim did.”

“Tim was eighteen, a decent kid and got his
bitch pregnant. Only the not-decent guys, like Ethan’s fuckhead
father, bolt when that shit hits. You lucked out.”

I knew that, boy did I know that.

“Anyway, what else?” Cheryl pushed.

“You met him, I don’t know how he was with
you but he’s pretty straight and he made it clear. His truck is in
the drive, I’m welcome in his bed. Other than that, no go. I’ve
asked him over for dinner, pancakes, even the girls asked him over
for dinner. He never showed.”

“He took you to the mall.”

“He got shang hai’ed by Keira.”

“
Girl, you been off the market way too
long. You marry a man, he’s lawfully bound to drag his ass to the
mall with you. Your girl is cute and she’s sweet and she’s funny
but there is no fuckin’ man on this fuckin’ earth who goes to a
fuckin’ mall unless there’s someone he wants to be with while he’s
there or there’s some shit hot sale on TVs. A sweet, cute, funny
teenage girl asks him or not. And that’s the God’s
honest
truth.”

I licked my lips and thought about last
night. I thought about how Joe met me on the deck like he was
waiting for me to come over, as anxious to see me after a week and
a half as I was to see him. I thought about how Joe walked back to
my house to make it safer for my girls. I thought about that whole
sad, crazy, ugly drama with his sad, scary, drunk-and-high ex-wife
and how he was and how he let me be with him after. I thought about
how he wanted me to walk home in his t-shirt. If that didn’t make a
statement, him giving me his clothes, even demanding I wear them,
nothing did. And I thought about what Cheryl was saying.

And I could not go there again.

“
Cheryl,” I said softly, “I can’t go there
again.”

“Babe –”

“No, I just can’t. Okay? This is what it is,
all it is, and I’m cool with that now that I know what it is. I
live my life and I’m not alone some of the time and the sex is
fantastic and I can take only that. Something else comes along then
it comes along. Joe’ll deal.”

“Something else comes along, Joe’s fuckin’
head will explode.”

I wasn’t sure that was true. I wasn’t sure
that Joe wouldn’t shrug, say, “Enjoy your life, buddy,” and walk
away. I wasn’t sure of that at all.

So I needed to stay right where I was and not
go there again.

“Can we stop talking about this?”

Cheryl was silent then she asked, “You comin’
out with me tonight?”

I couldn’t go over to Joe’s until the girls
were asleep anyway so I said, “Yeah, sure, sounds fun.”

“
It’ll be a blast. Meet you there at, say,
eight thirty?”

“Great.”

“Cool, see you then and… dress down, babe, I
don’t need the competition.”

“Shut up, you’re gorgeous.”

“I’m a dick magnet.”

“We’ll find you a good one.”

“
Well, hopefully you can spot ‘em because I
can’t,” she told me then finished, “later.”

“Bye.”

She hung up and I got up from my bed. Taking
another sip from my soda, I crossed the room, opened the door and
yelled, “Keira! You comin’ with me to KFC?”

“Yeah!” Keira yelled back.

I put the phone on its charger in the
kitchen, grabbed my purse, Keira hit the kitchen and I hustled my
daughter out the door. I managed not to look at Joe’s house at all
as I got in my Mustang, pulled out and drove away.

* * * * *

I looked in the bathroom mirror and hoped
Cheryl wouldn’t be pissed at me.

I decided not to dress down but to make an
effort. I didn’t know why, just that after KFC (with Dane eating
the vast majority of the bucket which I knew he would and also why
I bought an entire bucket), I got the urge to make an effort. I
hadn’t done anything since before Tim died (except dress for his
funeral) where I could make myself up, wear something a bit nicer
and feel good about myself for awhile, so I did it.

However if Cheryl wore spike-heeled slut
sandals to a backyard barbeque, I figured my effort would pale in
comparison.

I finished my lip gloss and walked to my
bureau, selecting jewelry and putting it on. Then I looked down at
my phone.

Since I started my preparations, I’d looked
to my phone about two dozen times, struggling with whether or not
to make the call.

Then I snatched it up, thinking,
fuck
it
.

I went to the phone
book, scrolled down, found the number Colt
had given me and I’d programmed in as “Joe’s Cell” and I hit
go.

It rang three times.

Then it was answered with Joe’s rumbly voice
saying, “Yo.”

“Joe?”

Silence then, “Vi.”

“Hey.”

“What’s up, buddy?”

“Um…”

I wanted to know, why I didn’t ask my
daughter and her boyfriend I didn’t know but I mostly didn’t
because she didn’t offer the information and I was careful not to
be too nosy with my teenage daughter but I still wanted to
know.

“Vi,” Joe called in my ear.

“Why did Kate and Dane come over today?”

Joe didn’t hesitate in answering. “Dane
wanted to know about what I do.”

“What?”

“Kate talked to me at the mall, said Dane was
interested in my business. He’s a senior next year, he’s
considerin’ his future.”

“
Oh,” I muttered, thinking again that Dane
was a good kid, taking time to consider his future and being smart
enough to talk to an expert about it then I looked to the clock,
saw it was already eight twenty-five and that I needed to get out
of there so I muttered, “Well, thanks.”

“Violet.”

“Yeah?”

“Is that it?”

“Yeah.”

“Everything else cool?”

“Um…” I decided on a different ring then the
one I put on, took the one I had on off and slid the other one on
and said, “Yeah, sure, why?”

“You seem distracted.”

“I’m a Mom, we’re always distracted.”

“Know some times you aren’t distracted,
buddy.”

I stopped moving and I felt a rush of heat
between my legs, remembering those same times.

“Joe,” I whispered.

“What’s on your mind?”

Did booty call partners care what was on
their booty call’s mind?

“Um…”

“Vi,” his rumbly voice was a warning. He was,
I found, not fond of asking twice.

“Keira wants a dog.” I blurted.

“Come again?”

“
Keira wants a dog. She’s always wanted a
dog. Her friend Heather’s dog had puppies, they’re some kind of
breed that costs a lot of money and Keira wants one.”

“So get her a dog.”

“They cost two hundred dollars, they’re an
extra mouth to feed and I need vet bills like I need a hole in the
head.”

This was met with total silence. Silence so
total, it scared me and I stopped randomly pawing through my
jewelry box and listened to the sheer totalness of the silence.

Then softly, Joe said, “It’s dog food,
buddy.”

“I know.”

“That’s not an extra mouth to feed.”

“Um…”

“You hurtin’?”

“Hurtin’ for what?”

“Money.”

I swallowed, thinking this was definitely not
booty call territory.

“We’re good.”

Again that utter silence.

Then he muttered, “Bullshit.”

“No, we’re fine.”

“We’ll talk when you get over here
tonight.”

We would?

“Joe –”

His voice dropped low when he ordered, “Wear
my shirt over, baby.”