Awaiting Fate (12 page)

“But…
No
,” she said firmly, shaking her head. She grabbed his hands at her face, pulled them away then turned from him again, walking away.

Running, she’s running again. I can’t let her get away, not again.

Panic clawing him, he materialized in front of her, blocking her escape. His eyes hardened to slits before, in a grim voice, he said, “Olivia, if you run from me
again
, I promise you I will
chase
you until I
find
you, and you know I keep my promises.”

He meant every word. She wouldn’t escape him, ever. Claimed or not, she was his, and he vowed he’d never part from her again, no matter what it cost him.

Chapter 14

Her wildly thumping heart stilled the moment he uttered the words that continued to replay in her mind:
You’re mine.

Everything she wanted, everything she needed.

He was all she’d thought of for months, but it couldn’t be true. Her mind couldn’t grasp it. They’d been friends and only friends for months, and during those months, not once had he done or said anything to make her think she was his.

“I
can’t
be your mate. I’m your friend. You’ve never…you’ve never been interested in me that way,” she said in denial, her voice cracking.

He parted his lips, baring his fangs. Unconsciously stepping away, she gasped. Before she could take another step, his fingers bit into her wrist.

“You
are
mine. My fangs still ache with the need to mark you. I stopped kissing you because I was a second away from sinking them into your neck, and I just showed you how I feel about you.”

There it was, an answer to why she’d felt an emotion so powerful radiating through her moments before she’d begged him for a single kiss.

Her heart clenching in her chest, she brought her hand to cover it. “That was you?”

He nodded.

“But…but you…you told me…demons knew right away when they find their mates. You told me—”

“I
did
know right away!” He paused to run his hand through his hair then he said, “Do you remember the first Guardian meeting you attended?”

Swallowing the emotion clogging her throat, she nodded.

“I saw you for the first time the day before. You were walking across the street from NYU. I was there guarding Jocelyn. I followed you then spotted Landon and overheard your conversation. I knew you’d never met immortals from other breeds, and I knew werewolves are reclusive by nature, so I waited, knowing I’d see you the very next day. It was the best option for me—for
us
.”

She remembered the moment well because she’d been overjoyed with the chance to finally get a glimpse of the immortal world. Still, that had been months ago, so she pointed out, “But it’s been months since then!”

Eyes hardening, he shot back, “Don’t you think I realize that? Do you think I haven’t been counting the days myself? Do you realize how hard this has been for
me
?” He sighed heavily. “The moment I met you, you claimed me, and all I wanted and needed was you, but I
couldn’t
because I would’ve risked losing you altogether.”

No. I can’t be his,
she thought, shaking her head in denial. She couldn’t be
his
because immortal males couldn’t bear being away from their fated mates, the need to mark them was unyielding, overwhelming and overpowered every thought, every action. He’d been able to stay away for
five
months, and for
five
months he hadn’t marked her, claimed her.

“Five months? You waited five months? It’s
not
possible. You wouldn’t have been able to control your need. Landon almost went crazy denying Jocelyn, and that was only three months.”

His eyes sparked, tinting their blue shade blood red then he snapped, “I never
denied
you. I
waited
for you. There’s a big difference, and I made every excuse to see you, to spend as much time with you as possible. You
are
mine.”

“No, no,” she said adamantly, shaking her head. She simply couldn’t believe she’d suffered for months for a male she belonged to.

“Yes. When I found you yesterday, you saw my desire. That’s why my eyes burned. I had spent days craving you without a glimpse, not knowing where to search. You
are
mine.” He tapped his chest forcefully. “
My
mate.”

Losing her patience, she shouted, “Stop saying that! I’m
not
your mate. You have—”

His eyes widened, clenching his jaw before he asked, “Olivia, why is this so hard for you to believe?”

Why? Had he really asked her why? Because it didn’t make any sense. “Because you…you’re an empath. You knew how I felt about you, yet you never told me.”

“I knew you were attracted to me, yes, but I wanted it to be more than physical attraction. I knew your feelings were growing, yes, but I didn’t know if you could accept a male who wasn’t of your kind. I wanted you to get to know me and trust me, maybe love me then when I told you, you wouldn’t be able to deny
us
a chance. You wouldn’t run, but you
did
anyway.”

“I ran because I was trying to forget you,” she blurted, then slapped her hand over her mouth as if the action would erase the words.

He recoiled, releasing his hold on her wrist. His expression hardened further, his eyes glowing a brighter red. “To further prove my point, you have no idea what I suffered for three days not knowing where you were or if you were safe, fearing what you just admitted, that you ran from me.
Me
!”

His eyes stark with pain shredded her composure. Tears welled in her eyes, threatening to spill. He’d willingly provided an answer to her lingering question, the reason he was a fraction of the man he used to be. And the answer was her. It was
her
fault. The realization drew grief so thick it choked her.

She gasped for breath as images of him assailed her: when he’d saved her from the explosion at the bar, when he turned in front of her, when she’d almost fainted after realizing she was in love with him. In every image, his jovial expression had transformed, replaced with fear—for her. While she’d lived in misery believing she loved a man she’d never keep, he’d lived in fear of losing a mate he never had.

Finally, she understood. His fear had stalled him, in turn hurting her. But she’d hurt him, too, by running away. Three days, she had been gone before he found her. He’d suffered. She wondered why he’d changed, and now she had the answer, an explanation for his moods, his demeanor and his quick-temper.

Without blinking, tears spilled down her cheeks.

He flinched, drawing his gaze away from hers briefly as if her tears pained him. “You
are
my mate, so there’s nothing I can do but follow you wherever you go. I can’t stay away from you, ever, and I won’t.”

In that moment, all the things he’d said she convinced herself meant nothing rushed her:

“You are beautiful. I thought so the first time I laid eyes on you.”

“You’re right. I’ll never hurt you, ever.”

“I love being your hero.”

“I know this one werewolf who’s not just pretty, she’s beautiful.”

“I’m not assigned to guard you, and your brother didn’t send me. I came here to be with you.”

Why hadn’t she realized it before? How could she have been so dense? She was inexperienced, and he’d never made a move, but he spent hours with her every day. He complimented her every chance he got. He patiently taught her everything she knew about the immortal world. But he’d shielded her from his feelings for fear she’d run, and she had. Would he ever forgive her? Could he?

She’d hurt the man she loved the most, and knowing it caused a deep pain in her chest, so searing she was sure the ache would kill her.

“You are
mine
. I want you. I need you, and I
love
you. I’ve never loved another. I’ll never forget you, and believe it or not, you will
never
forget me,” he said firmly, his eyes still ablaze, holding hers captive.

He was angry, angrier than last night, angrier than she’d ever seen him: his eyes afire, his jaw clenched, a muscle ticking, speaking to her in a way he never had. Still, she wasn’t frightened. In her heart, she knew, as she knew the day he’d turned demon for her to see, he’d never hurt her.

A sob escaped her then she wiped the tears streaming down her face and admitted, “I ran because I love you. Because I hoped I could forget you—”

“Because I’m not a werewolf!” he screamed, cutting her words off before she could explain then he unleashed his emotions.

Pain, anguish, torment, anger and rage…The intensity of his emotions struck the middle of her chest. The ache inside her fused with it, making the pain too much to bear. She swore any minute her chest would burst. Overwhelmed, her legs wobbled as useless tears continued to flow down her cheeks, recklessly bearing her river of misery for him to see.

“No,” she managed to say between sobs. “Because I thought…I thought…I could never have you…I thought you…were destined for someone else.”

In a split second, the anger, pain and anguish surrounding them vanished. His face paled, the red in his eyes dissolved. He stood still, staring at her in disbelief until finally his arms encased her. Holding her head tenderly against him, he rubbed her back ever so softly. He rested his chin on top of her head, and waited patiently as she sobbed against his bare chest, unleashing the agony she’d suffered and the agony she’d caused him, the man she loved.

“I’m sorry, Liv. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me, deliciae,” he whispered every so often.

Please, please let him forgive me. I can’t live without him. I don’t want to live without him
, she prayed.

“I’m sorry, Cain,” she said between sobs. “I’m sooo…sorry.”

Cupping her cheeks, he angled her face to his and whispered, “Shh…shh…darling. Everything’s fine.” He then pressed his lips against her forehead softly and pulled her against him again.

The warmth of his body soothed her as deeply as the words he’d uttered.

She knew he’d forgiven her.

She knew he’d never hold it against her.

She knew he loved her.

He said so, and she believed him. Just like that, the ache in her chest dissipated and her sobs quieted.

Then he whispered those familiar words, “Meae deliciae, meus sodalis.”

She pulled away from him slightly to stare into his blue eyes. “You realize I don’t know what that means, right?”

His eyes on hers, he rubbed the tears from her cheeks ever so softly then nodded.

“Well, are you going to tell me?”

He chuckled, and despite the tears streaking her face, she couldn’t help but follow. His laughter was contagious. He possessed the ability to make anyone forget their troubles and laugh.

“It means, ‘my darling, my mate,’” he replied, then kissed her lips softly.

The tender kiss, coupled with his heat, rekindled desire in her.

My darling, my mate
, she thought.

Perfect.

Chapter 15

Smiling, excitement coursing through him, the anger and rage Cain felt moments before were now nothing but a bleak, forgettable memory.

It couldn’t have been more perfect if he’d dreamt it. That was a lie. If he had it his way, Olivia wouldn’t have shed tears, but the end was all that mattered. After five months, Olivia knew she was his, and she remained in his arms. To top it off, she loved him. He couldn’t be more thrilled.

Reaching for him, she hooked her arms around his neck and placed her lips over his firmly. He was as enamored, captivated, by them as he’d been before he ever kissed her. The willpower he learned over the last five months granted him the strength to pull away slowly.

“Don’t you need me?” she asked, her cheeks flushing, a stark reminder she was a virgin.

Despite his need for her, the need to mark her and claim her, the need he’d battled with for months, he couldn’t and wouldn’t take her now.

He stared into her puffy eyes, his body strung tight unable to believe the words he was about to utter. “Yes, darling, I need you, but I can wait.”

“Why?” she asked, then immediately looked away from him, flushing a brighter shade.

He lifted her chin with his finger then said somberly, “Because I want it to happen when my mate hasn’t shed tears I caused. I want our first time to be special.”

In all honesty, it was more than that. He had held back his need for months. Because of it, he feared he’d lose control, take her roughly and make it painful instead of pleasurable. Making matters worse was the fact she was a virgin. He needed to take his time with her, introduce her to sex slowly.

“You didn’t…I did—”

“No, darling, I did. If I had been braver, if I hadn’t been such a coward…I should’ve told you long before today and spared us both pain. I will repay you for every hurt I caused you. I promise.”

“I forgive you,” she said softly. “But I hurt you, too. I’m sorry. Will you f-forgive me?” she stuttered, nervously.

“There’s nothing to apologize for, nothing to forgive. If I had told you sooner, you wouldn’t have run.” He rubbed his palm against her back. His mate, responsive to his touch, arched. He smiled, pulling her into him until her cheek rested against his chest. “I think I promised you a day at the beach,” he whispered in her ear.

He didn’t wait for a response. Materializing at the shore carrying her, he ran into the ocean then dropped her in the freezing water.

She shrieked and laughed. “That was not nice,” she said, standing in front of him, then splashed the cold water on his face.

She removed her wet shirt, inch by inch uncovering her glorious flesh. His eyes ravished her body.

Her gaze raked his body, stopping when it met his eyes. “Umm…I think you didn’t think this through,” she said, pointing to his wet jeans.

He’d been too consumed admiring her to notice. Smirking, he said, “You’re right. I didn’t.”

Closing the feet between them, he wrapped an arm around her, pulled her against him and materialized in the spare room. She wobbled slightly.

He placed his hands on her shoulders to steady her then mumbled, “Sorry.”