Away From the Spotlight (22 page)

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Authors: Tamara Carlisle

BOOK: Away From the Spotlight
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“Your parents are going?
  Don’t you worry that the press will invade their privacy as well?” I asked
sounding hurt that they could
be included in this and not me.

“It’s not the same.  The press is
far more interested in my love-
life than my family. 
My parents and sisters
are
pretty much left alone other than a few pictures at
premiere
s now and
again
.”

I
was
certain
I still looked sad.
  In fact, I wanted to cry, but worked hard to hold back the tears.


Trust
me when I say that you really
don’t
want to be a part of this.  I’m doing this to protect you.  I would love nothing more than to tell the whole world about us and to share everything in my life with you, but that would be selfish of me and you would end up hating me for it.”


How do
you
know?  Have you had a problem before?”
I asked a little petulantly, wondering what other girl may have suffered through this kind of thing.


Well, I told you about what they did to Gemma and Kate
, a
nd I didn’t hold either of them out as my girlfriend in public

O
f course, neither of them
actually
was
my girlfriend.  I can’t imagine what the press and the photographers would do to someone I made clear was my girlfriend.  You wo
uldn’t have a moment’s peace.”

His answer wasn’t exactly what I was looking for and he must have noticed because he became silent for a moment as if thinking
about
how to
answer
further
.

H
e
then
added, “
T
o answer your
real
question, no.  I haven’t had a serious girl
friend since I’ve been famous.”

“Define

serious.


“I’m not going to tell you I haven’t dated because I’m not going to lie to you, but I haven’t had anyone I would consider my girlfriend.
 
Look,” he said pleading in his voice, “I don’t want to ruin this evening for either of us.  Know that I’m only thinking of you.  I
’m only trying to protect you.”

I couldn’t hold back anymore. 
My eyes
started to well up with tears.

“Don’t
.
  I love you.  You have no idea how much I love you.  Please do
n’t cry.  Don’t be sad.  I want
this night to be perfect.”

He started to kiss me and took my hand to lead me over to the couches around the fire pit.  Without much trouble, he lit the fire and sat back
o
n one of the comfortable beige couches that surrounded the fire pit.  He looked at me and curled his finger toward himself,
silently
asking me to
sit down next to him.

I
soon
was glad that Will’s neighbors on either side all had one story houses as well, that the fences between them were high, and that there were no windows
from the neighboring houses that could
look down into the backyard.

Because Will had
to be at
a radio interview at seven a.m., having to leave much earlier than that, and to afford us one more opportunity to be together, I broke my 9-to-
4
study rule that day and slept in,
a
waiting Will
’s
return.

I awoke
with a start at nothing.  It was ten
a.m.
and Will still
hadn’t returned
.  I brushed my teeth immediately
upon waking
as had become my habit and then jumped in the shower.  When I was finished washing my hair, I got out and wrapped the towel around me
just
as Will
entered the bathroom
quickly
,
eyes smoldering,
anxious to find me.
  My towel didn’t remain on long.

As we lay in bed facing each other, I asked, “Are you excited about tonight?”

“Sort of.  Well, not about the
premiere
exactly.
It’s j
ust that,
if the movies continue to do well, it makes it easier for me to be considered bankable enough to do other things I want to do.”

“What do you want to do?”
  It seemed strange that I had not
thought to
ask him this question yet.

He was
pensive
for a moment. 
“I don’t know if there is anything necessarily specific
yet

At this point,
I just want longevity.  I don’t want to be finished after a few years.  I want to be able t
o grow and do different things as an actor
and
in the industry in general.


When I started
, it was hard.  You know
,
I had a small part in a big British movie first. 
I dropped out of
university
, thinking it would be easy after that. 
But
it was
quite some time
before I was cast in
Midnight 1
.


T
hen
Midnight 1
was very successful financially, but not critically so
, and I didn’t reap
much
of the financial benefits

But
I was
cast in
a few independent films after that.  That’s where I was able to show I could actually act rat
her than just brood on camera.

“I then signed on for
Midnight 2
and
3
and made
a lot
more money
, b
ut i
t wasn’t until after
Midnight 2
that I was considered
for
other high-profile
movies
in
supporting roles with
some
very good ac
tors.  And the money
continued to
improve.


O
f course, with
Midnight 4
, my agent negotiated a piece of the back end, which will allow me to possibly fund my own project.”

“Wow.  I didn’t realize you were so ambitious.”

“You thought it was just you, huh?”
  He smirked.

“I’
m just surprised sometimes that we are so different and yet so similar.”

“If you think I’m similar to you, that’s quite a compliment.”

“I think your regard for me is a little out of line with reality.”

“I don’t think so.”

Before he would
further
embarrass me
by
singing my praises, I changed the subject and became suddenly serious. 
“I’m going to miss you.  I can’t imagine not having you around.”

“I know.  I’m sorry.  I’ll be thinking about you the whole time.”

“You’re going to be too busy to think of me.  I’m the one who’s going to be home with only boring law books and my thoughts to keep me company.”

“I won’t be too busy.  I’ll be wishing you were with me
every minute
.  I’ll make sure you know I

m thinking of you.”

I started to tear up and held him tightly.  I don’t know how I survived before Will
or
how I was going to survive with him gone.

We
ate
lunch on the couches near the fire pit so that we could sit close to each other.   Will had his left arm around me as we sat there quietly eating and kissing intermittently.  At that point, neither of us was up for much conversation.

Will drove me home just after lunch as he needed to get ready for the
premiere
, which I didn’t realize started so early.

He walked me into my apartment carrying my bag. 
Carrie
was sitting at the table surround
ed
by
Bar review
books and highlighter pens.

I
grabbed
my bag from
Will and
took it
into my
bedroom while
Will
spoke with
Carrie
.

Returning to the living room, I heard Will say
to
Carrie
, “Take care of her for me
,

a
nd he winked at her.

“No problem,” she replied smiling.

I w
alked Will
to his car and he kissed me passionately before getting into the car.

“I love you
.  I’ll
ring
you tonight.  It may be late, but I promise I’ll call.”

“I love you too.  Have fun.”  With that, I waved as he drove off and my eyes started to well up with tears.

“Three weeks,” I sighed
and tried to hold back the tears unsuccessfully
.

True to his word, Will made every attempt to let me know he was thinking of me.  I received texts telling me he missed me from the
premiere
itself.  I smiled as I pictured him texting me while walking down the red carpet, although I doubt
that
he actually did it then.  He sent me a picture with his camera phone of the crowd and I was amazed.  It was huge and pr
edominantly
female.

I also
received
a call from Will briefly late that night from the party after the
premiere
.  I could
hardly
hear over the noise, but I thought I heard him say,
“I love you.  Sleep well.”

T
hen I heard what probably
was
other cast and crew members sh
outing, “Good night, Shannon.”

Chapter
S
i
x
teen

While I
was
stud
ying
the next day with
Carrie
, we received a call from the phone box a
t the front of the complex.  I buzzed in
a florist with a massive vase full of pink and white
carousel rose
s.
  The card
had Will’s handwriting and
read, “Thinking about you every second as I promised.  Love, W.”

I sent a quick text, “Rec’d flowers.  Beautiful.  Thank u. 
ILY
.”

A little later, I received a brief response via text, “Miss u &
ILY
2.”

T
hat night, t
o keep from making myself crazy thinking
of
Will,
Carrie
and I met
Rachael
at the
Royalist
after class.

B
eing in love must make you more attractive because I
received
more attention than usual that night
, even more than I had the time I was here right after I met Will

To make myself feel better,
I dressed up a little with a black form fitting shirt and
mini
skirt, but I had looked better at the
Royalist
on other occasions
and
had
received far less attention.

The
Royalist
probably wasn’t the best choice of venue since it now represented the place I met Will rather than a pub I had frequented since I turned 21.
  I was a little depressed and decided to go splash some cold water on my face to make myself
feel a little better.

As I headed back toward the b
athroom, I noticed that Stephen,
Colin, Kate and Gemma were sitting at a low table
that had been
hidden from my spot near the bar.
 
Their surprise at seeing me was clear.
 
The boys
stood
.

“What are you doing
here
?  I would have thought you’d be home studying,” Colin said as he kissed me on the cheek.

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