Baby Did a Bad Bad Thing (Hautboy Series Book 3) (5 page)

I felt a pang of disappointment over another failed relationship.  At this point, I was fairly certain I would never find someone who understood me, not to the level that Em and Shane understood one another.  I was envious that they had embraced what so many rarely found.

“How am I on time?” Jaxon asked.  He was tall and lanky, with dirty blond hair.  He looked like I did in nursing school the first time I was about to poke my lab partner with a needle; like he was about to puke his guts up.

Shane looked away from Em, and at his watch.  “Damn, yeah, better get backstage.”  He grabbed Em’s hand, and with a quick wave, followed Marshall out into the crowd.

Jaxon smiled nervously and saluted Jake before trailing behind them.  His sight still wasn’t one hundred percent, because he only made it about five feet before placing his hand on Em’s shoulder for guidance.  His other arm, he reached up and dragged it across his forehead.

“He’s going to puke his guts up,” Jake observed.

“Is this his first time on stage?”

“No.”  Jake snorted.  “Kid was busking when we found him in Eugene.  Had been for about two years.”

“Lucky break.”  From busking to Hautboy.  Not bad.

“Ain’t nothing lucky about it.  He’s good.  Fucking self-taught.”

“No shit?”  That’s pretty amazing.

“From what we’ve been told, he played a bit in high school.  The rest he learned from watching videos on the internet at the library.”

“Impressive.”

“He’s a good guy.”

“He’s nice.”  It was a general statement.  Something you said for the lack of having something better to say.  I was being polite.

Taking a deep draw of my beer, I swallowed it down with a gulp.  I was back to contemplating whether or not I should call my brother for a ride home.  It might be worth hearing Pax’s wrath just to get this night over with.

“Let’s go,” said Jake.  He held out his hand.  Obtusely, I stared.  “You came out tonight for a reason, Shaw.  You want to take some frustration out; I’m giving you the chance.  But you’d better jump now before Marshall comes back.  He’s a better man than I am.”

Quickly, I slammed my beer down and grasped his hand.  His fingers curled around mine in a firm grip.  I wish that last drink had been something harder.  Whoever had come up with the analogy of butterflies fluttering in their stomach had it all wrong.  Mine was filled with eels.

It wasn’t a bad thing, just that same rush Jaxon was feeling right now.

I followed him to the elevators.  The doors on the right opened first.  We stepped inside.  Taylor, the remaining bodyguard, stopped just outside and waited with his back to the doors.  Jake pressed the button and the doors began to close, sealing off the sound of the band and the screaming fans.  The only distinguishable sound was the bass reverberating up the elevator shaft and through the floor.

“Nervous, Shaw?”

“Riddled with anticipation.”  No lie.  I was totally fangirling.  I was no better than Monica, whom I’d criticized a day ago for doing the very same thing.

Abruptly, I found myself against the wall of the elevator.  My cheek felt feverish against the cold stainless steel.  Jake’s teeth scraped over my shoulder, sending a thrill of pain straight to my groin.  “Why wait?”

“The buildup is half the fun.”

Behind me, Jake growled low in his throat.  “Shaw, I think I could really like you.”  A sharp clap to my backside wiped the smile from my face.  I sucked a sharp breath through my teeth.

“Fuck!”

“Hurt?”

“A little.”

“Can you take it?”

“It all depends on why you did it.”

Jake laughed lowly.  “It’s all part of the buildup.”

Oh.  Fuck.  “Ok.”

“Ok?”

“I can take it.”

“God, you’re a fuckin’ gem.  Why’d the doctor let you go?”

That, I didn’t want to discuss.  “How many floors is this place?”  When were the fucking doors to this box going to open?

“Two.  The second floor is mine.”  Jake released my arm.  I stepped away from the wall.  The door was already open.  I ambled off the elevator, and into Jake’s penthouse apartment.  “You’re going to answer that question, Shaw.  Don’t think I’m letting that go.”

“Noted,” I said absently, looking over his place.  It was glass, the whole interior.  The floor was tinted, but you could see the entire club and its occupants below.  The walls were pale, but frosted for privacy.  Thank God for small favors.

Only one wall was opaque, and that was the kitchen, which was stainless from top to bottom.  The cabinets and utilities were all concealed behind anonymous panels of steel.

The bed, sheathed in white, sat in the dead center of the room.

“What do you think?”

“That I need to take off my shoes.”

“Leave the shoes.  Take off the dress.”  Flushing, I met his eyes, aware he was serious.  I expected to find more steel in his gaze, but I found diamonds instead.  They were glittering with humor.  “Another drink then to loosen the zipper a little.”

He turned and strode to the kitchen.  As I watched him open and close the cabinets, I used the wall to balance myself in my heels while I removed my dress.  At the touch of my hand, the glass flickered and became translucent.  That alone was enough to astound me.

But when I saw the scene in the adjoining room, I gasped.

“Oh.  My.  God.”  Was that?  It was!  Cade was in the next room with some nondescript blonde.  He’d earned his moniker honestly.  I couldn’t look.  I couldn’t look away.  It was an unavoidable attraction to the opposite sex.  He was magnificent.  He was brutal.

In one lithe stride, he lifted the blonde’s hips and drove himself into her.  I couldn’t hear anything, but I knew she screamed in pleasure.  Her back arched, her mouth bobbed, her eyes slivered and glassy.  She was high on serotonin.  And my buzz was fading quickly.

Adrenaline was taking over.

Jake was right.  The man fucked like a bull.  He was animalistic, all those corded muscles flexing and contracting.  They seemed to pop out everywhere.  Along his shoulders.  Down his back.  Even his ass had defined cuts.  He was a living work of art, a marble Adonis in the flesh.

The glass frosted over, cutting off my view.

Had my hips been rocking?

I met Jake’s stare, which looked surprisingly displeased.  My mouth bobbed, unsure of what to say.  “Um…”

“Um…?” Jake prompted, arching one single brow.

“I can’t.”  I shook my head, trying to dispel the image of Cade and the blonde.  “I don’t even know where to start.”

“The glass is mirrored.  We can see them, but they can’t see us,” Jake explained, answering my unspoken questions.  “They’re fully aware that they might be observed.  For legal reasons, anyone who uses the room signs disclosures beforehand.”

“Did you have this built?”

“It was existing when I bought the place.  Though, it was a strong motivator in the purchase.”

“You enjoy watching?”

“I have very specific criteria for whom I allow to use the rooms.  Call me prejudiced, but it’s more enjoyable when the occupants are physically fit, male and female.”

Indeed.

Touching the glass again, I watched it defrost.  Cade was working up a sweat, his body glistening in the soft light.  Again, I couldn’t get over the cuts and contours of his body.  Watching him, one could fully appreciate the male anatomy.  They had an undeniable raw beauty that evoked the basest of feelings.  Claim.  Dominate.  Protect.  Procreate.  While many traits had been bred out of the twenty first century male, these withheld the test of time.

If Jake hadn’t told me the glass was mirrored, I’d swear Cade looked right at me.  A smirk played at the corners of his lips.  Jake was quick to dispel the sight, touching the glass again until it frosted over.

“You’re sure he can’t see us?”

“Definite, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t putting on a show for you.  I think you hurt his feelings.”

“I doubt that.”

“Don’t.  He was watching you from the moment you passed by his table.”

“You’re lying.”  Whap!  Jake flicked his wrist.  A riding crop I hadn’t even realized he was holding, welted my backside.  “What the fuck was that for?”

Jake smiled wryly as I rubbed the sting from my ass.  He looked like that cat who’d just ate the canary.  “I don’t like to be called a liar.”  Slowly, he began circling me, no doubt to see the fruit of his efforts.  I turned with him, denying him the pleasure.

“You can’t possibly know that!”

“I beg to differ.”

“How then?”

“Because I—along with every other man in that club downstairs—”  He pointed his crop at the floor below— “was watching you.  You turn heads, Shaw.  Why do you think your brothers are so damn protective?”

“Because they’re idiots and like to make my life miserable!”

“You really are naïve.”

“Fuck you!”  This time, the keeper grazed the tip of my breast.  My nipple stung with pain that quickly faded to a slow burn.  I found it oddly exhilarating.

“You like that, don’t you?”

“No!”

Again, this time the opposite breast.  “I don’t like liars either.”

“Fucking asshole!”  Because both hands were protecting my breasts, I’d left my ass open for attack.  Jake was quick to take advantage with a solid land to my left cheek.  This one was the strongest yet, and made his eyes wild with desire.

“You in or out, Shaw?  You can still walk away.”

Could I?  Did I want to?  God, I’d never felt so alive.  How did I go back to finding the next Henry Powell after having a taste of Jake Whalen?  I didn’t.  Jake would ruin me for every other man.  Would?  He already had.  Even if I walked out, I’d always wonder from this point on what it would’ve been like to surrender to him.  I mean, if I was going to be ruined, I might as well do it thoroughly and know for certain that no other man could compare.

“You know what I’m about.”

Squaring myself, I lifted my chin.  “I’m in.”

Chapter 5
 

“
A
rms up.”

Hesitantly, I lifted my arms above my head, thanking God I shaved my armpits.  Jake lifted his crop and dragged the keeper softly down the inside of my arm.

“I have conditions.”

My breath came out in a sigh.  I dropped my arms.  “What sort of conditions?”

“I’m curious about you, Shaw.  I want to know more.”

“You want to talk.”  Was he serious?  I was wearing only my skivvies and heels, and he wanted to talk.

“It’s a sore point, I know.  But it’s all part of the buildup.”  He tapped my arm, reminding me that my arms were supposed to be up.  With another sigh, I lifted them above my head.

“What’s with the arms?”

“I’d normally bind you, but I don’t feel comfortable placing you in that position during your first go round.”  He circled me, the tip of his crop trailing over my hips and lower back, raising goosebumps across my skin.  “Instead I’m going to do a points and rewards system.  I’ll ask a question.  Answer it to my satisfaction and I’ll reward you.  Refuse…”  The pressure of the crop disappeared.  A second later it came down across my ass, just firm enough to leave a sting.  “And I’ll give you a lash.”

“One lash?”

Jake chuckled under his breath.  “You’re going to try me, I know.  That’s where the arms come in.  They stay up in the air at all times.  You drop them once, you lose the bra.  Twice, you lose the panties.  Three times, we’re done with the foreplay.”

“That doesn’t sound like much of a punishment.”

“It is if you value orgasms.”

He had me at the plural.  “First question.”

“Are you a virgin?”

I snorted.  “No.”

“Look or touch?”

“I don’t understand.”

“Reward, Shaw.  I could remove something of mine or touch something of yours.”

“Touch.  Definitely touch.”

“Love the enthusiasm.”  Pinching my chin, he tilted it up, and took my mouth in a searing kiss.  There was no initial test or exploratory tasting.  It was go for the gold, all lips and tongue.  I was panting by the time he pulled away.  Reluctantly, I withdrew my fingers from his hair.  “Arms, Shaw.  I’ll let this one slide since you’re new to the game.”

“That doesn’t seem fair.  You were kissing me.”

“My rules.  How many lovers have you had?”

“That’s kind of personal.”  Whap!  It happened faster and harder than the exemplar.  Taken by surprise, I yelped and grabbed my ass.  “Fuck!  That hurt!”

“Arms, Shaw.”  He flashed a momentary smile.

“Come on!  You hit me really hard!”

“Can’t take it?”

Scowling, I reached up, unhooked my bra and let it fall to the floor.  I felt a sense of satisfaction when Jake swore under his breath.  Ignoring my budding nipples, I raised my arms back into the air.

“How many?”

“Two.”

“Including the doctor?”

“That was two questions.”

“You’re not giving anything away tonight, are you?”  His eyes were still on my breasts.  Unconsciously, he pulled the corner of his lower lip between his teeth.  He wanted to touch.  Terribly so.  Too bad I wouldn’t let him.

“Lose the shirt, Whalen.”

Frowning in discontent, Jake pulled his shirt over his head.  I was surprised to find the only tattoo was the cuff wrapping his forearm.  It was a staff and notes that looped in a perpetual repeat.  At the angle he was standing, I couldn’t tell what song it was from.

“What’s the matter—you find Cade more appealing?”  Dropping his shirt to the floor, he leaned closer to my ear.  “You haven’t seen everything yet, Shaw.”  He nibbled my earlobe, making me regret my choice of rewards.  My breasts felt bereft without his touch.

“Including the doctor!” I answered quickly.  “Including the doctor!”

“Fucking thank you.”  Bending at the knees, Jake grasped me by the waist and lifted me so that he could take my nipple into his mouth.  Each scrape of his teeth stirred deep in my core.

“Oh God!”  I wanted my hands in his hair.  I needed them in his hair.  I didn’t really need my panties anyway, right?  “Don’t stop, please!”

With a groan, Jake released my nipple, and dropped me back to my feet.  He backed up a few steps, placing a little distance between us.  “Not yet, Shaw.  I still have more questions.”

“Really?  My arms are getting tired.”

“Then answer my questions a little more quickly.  What happened between you and the doctor?”

“We had a falling out.”

“More detail.”

“Phrase your questions better.”

The frown returned to Jake’s face, pulling down the corners of his lips.  His shoulders dropped.  “What're you doing here, Shaw?”

Confounded over his turn of emotion, I dropped my arms.  This wasn’t part of the game.  He wasn’t playing.  The sparkle was gone from his eyes.  “Do you want me to leave?”

“I want to know what you’re doing here.  You’re smart.  You’re beautiful.  What’re you doing in a place like this?”

“I could say the same of you.”

“Can’t you just answer the fuckin’ question?” he snapped.  When I reached for my dress, he cracked me with the whip again.  “I’m not done with you!”

Gritting my teeth, I straightened my back.  My eyes brimmed with tears, but I refused to let them fall.  He was pissing me the fuck off.

“Am I pissing you off?”

“Yes,” I answered.  My ass was getting sore.

“Is this what you wanted when you came here tonight?”

“No.”

“You still want to leave?”

Did I?  Fuck.  “No.”

“Then answer my question or you’re out.  I’ll have Marshall drive you home.”

Fuck it.  The first tear fell.  I was about to bare my soul to someone who’d laughed at me a couple hours earlier.  He’d tanned my ass with a whip.  I didn’t have much dignity to lose.

“Fuck.”  Jake pushed a hand through his hair and stepped toward me.  Holding up my hand, I took a step back.

“Don’t.  I’m fine.”

Taking one long look at me, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.  “I’ll have Marshall pull the car around.”

“I’m not leaving.”

“You’re not cut out for this.”

“I’ll fucking talk!  Ok?” I snapped.  I wiped what tears had fallen and willed the rest away.  “Just don’t laugh or deride me or I’ll shove that crop so far up your ass, you’ll be picking leather from your teeth!”

“Understood.”  Lifting his arm, he pointed the crop toward the bed.  “On the bed.  Lie on your stomach.  Lose the panties.”

Without batting an eye, I laced my fingers into my waist of my underwear and slid them down over my hips.  I wasn’t done there.  I bent at the waist and guided them over my high heels, giving Jake quite the eyeful.

“Shaw, I should give you ten lashes for that, but I'm going to let it go. You're already nice and rosy.”

“Either I’m not as intriguing as you claimed or you need to recheck your priorities if I’m standing here naked and all you can think about is hitting me with a fucking whip.”

Nonetheless, I climbed onto the bed and dropped to my stomach.

“Maybe if you were a little more forthcoming—”

“I’d be in the other room with Cade,” I interjected.  “It’s the unknown that makes me intriguing.  That and the violet hair.  Otherwise I’d be another ordinary blonde, and you wouldn’t have given me a second thought.”

“Why do you devalue yourself like that?”

“Because when you’re not an athlete or a rock star, you’re ordinary.”

Climbing onto the bed, Jake slid his leg over my thighs, straddling them.  “Loosen up, Shaw.  I’m not going to poke you in the ass.  I just want to rub some lotion on you so you don’t chafe.”  I heard the click of the bottle and then his hands rubbing together.  A second later, they were massaging my ass.  “So tell me what you were expecting when you came here tonight.”

“To get drunk.  Maybe hook up with some stranger in the bathroom.”

Jake sighed.  I was pretty sure he was shaking his head.  “The only thing you’re going to get in the bathrooms here is some venereal disease.”

“You take the chance of catching a disease every day.  Look at Henry.  He was fucking Agatha in his call room.”  After it came out, I contemplated that further.  “No, I take that back.  Agatha couldn’t catch a cab, let alone a venereal disease.  She and Henry are perfect for one another.”

“What did you see in him anyway?”

“He’s sort of a geek.”

“You found that an attribute.”

“He had this whole Clark Kent thing going on.  Underneath the glasses, he was actually handsome.”

“Yeah.  Great guy.”

“We were on the way out, anyhow.”

“Why?”

“He wanted the two point five kids and the picket fence.  I didn’t.”

“Most people don’t understand what’s involved in raising kids.  They have to experience it themselves.”

He said that like he understood where I was coming from.  “You have kids?”  It was entirely possible.  For all I knew he could have love children scattered across the country.  I felt a wash of relief when he answered.

“No, but I helped my grandmother raise my sister.  I know what it’s like to have that responsibility at a young age.”

“I have you beat.  I have ten younger siblings.”  Folding my arms under my chin, I rested my head on them.  “Do you want kids?”

“No.”

“How young were you when you realized you didn’t want them?”

“Most men in their twenties—and I use ‘men’ loosely—don’t want them.  We’re too busy thinking about fucking, and sometimes we think about fucking so much we forget the two are intrinsically related.  By the time we’ve regained our senses, we realize we’ve just gave the worst fuck to give—and by that I mean we’ve fucked up.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s not just men.  I’ve had my own experiences with fucking up.”

“Not possibly with the geeky doctor.”

“No, my first.  I broke up with him about an hour later.  I pretty much washed my hands of boys, and concentrated on school, work, and saving money to get my own place.  I love my family, but I couldn’t wait to get out of that house.”

“So you moved out of your parents’ house and rebelled by dating Henry.  I hate to tell you, Shaw, but when you rebel, you go for the bad boys, not the geeky interns.”

“I dated Henry because he was safe.  I knew I wouldn’t have to worry about getting knocked up by him.”

“I still don’t get it.  I, myself, understand where you’re coming from, but ninety-nine percent of the population would’ve dismissed your reluctance to have kids because of your age.  They would’ve shrugged it off and given you time.  Yet, the doctor dumped—”

“I had my tubes tied a month ago.”

“Oh.”

“Henry thought I should've discussed it with him, that I should've waited a few more years until I was older.  I disagreed.  I’d thought about it long and hard.  My doctor refused to perform the procedure until I had counseling.  So I went and talked to a shrink once a week for three months.  In the end, she signed the release form.”

“You had to have a release form signed.”  He sounded indignant about it.

“Reversal is difficult.  They had to avoid potential lawsuits for performing one on a patient as young as I am.”  I threatened them with a lawsuit if they
didn’t
do it.  I’d also threatened to go to some disreputable doctor that would.  Only then did he agree, but on the condition that I would have counseling first.  It was a small burden compared to an unplanned pregnancy.

“As opposed to what age?”

I shrugged.  “Late twenties with children.  Or thirties without.”

“What if you changed your mind?”

“I won’t.  It's not that I don’t like kids.  I just don't want the responsibility.  I watched my parents struggle with the bills.  Thirteen mouths to feed isn’t cheap.  Financially, college was out of the question.  So I settled.  I worked my way through nursing school.  It’s not a job I wanted, but it’s a career.  It was enough to get me out of the house.  Now, I want the time to do what I want.  I want to travel.  See the world.  Discover who I am.  Growing up in a large family, there was no individuality.  There was no independence.  No solitude.  There was no me.  I’ve yet to figure it out.  When I finally do, I get what…five, six years to enjoy it before settling down and having the two point five kids?”

No, thank you.

“Are you opposed to marriage too?”

“No, I’m all for it.  I just don’t expect to find someone who understands me.”  Needing a change of subject, I pushed up on my elbows and glanced over my shoulder.  “Are we going to talk all night?”

Jake smirked, noting my impatience.  “One more question.”

I rolled my eyes and dropped my chin onto my folded arms.  “One,” I qualified.

“What did you discover about yourself tonight?”

My face flushed with color.  “I think I like the crop.”  It came out so quietly, I wasn’t sure if he heard me, but his intake of breath proved otherwise.