Back Where We Belong (A Second Chances New Adult Romance) (6 page)

Luke passes me my clothes and gives
me a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder as if to say “I'm still here.” I'm not
sure it will help. Nothing is going to help. I'm so ashamed. No, not ashamed.
I'm just embarrassed.

I quickly sit up on the arm of
the chair and cling onto my clothes, covering up my nudity.

And my mother is still screaming.
“How could you?” she yells. “I turn my back for one moment and you're opening
your legs to any Tom, Dick or Harry. Begging them to fuck you.”

Oh god, she heard that.

I wish she hadn't seen us like
this or heard that but it's too late now.

“I told you to leave,” Mom shouts
at Luke. “I want to talk to my daughter.”

“No. I won't leave her. Not like
this.”

I don't say anything. I don't
know what I can say. I just want to get dressed. I drop my panties twice. My
hands are shaking. I can see Luke wants to help me. He takes a step and I give
him warning look. I don't think that would help at the moment.

“I don't know what you see in the
little slut anyway,” Mom says to Luke. “Other than the obvious. Or maybe that is
exactly what you see in her. Planning on enjoying yourself a few times with my
whore of a daughter tonight, were you?”

She bends over and picks up a
handful of condoms from the floor.

“I expect he already knows you're
a sure thing, Madison, doesn’t he? Once your legs are open you can't keep them
closed. Is that it? Like that slut your father has taken up with? Maybe you're
more like him that I thought. And deceptive. Nancy couldn't make it for dinner
so I came straight home, but you thought you'd make use of the house in my
absence, didn't you? You couldn't wait to take off your panties for that piece
of trash.”

“Mom, don't you dare talk to Luke
like that.” She's really getting into her stride now and soon there'll be no
stopping her tirade.

“I'll dare all I want. It's no
more than he deserves. Look at him. He thinks he's good enough for you, doesn't
he? Maybe you belong together. You're both trash. But I know you, you're just
bored, and he'll do fine and dandy for the summer. You'll find bigger fish to fry
at college, someone more suitable to open your legs for.”

“I'm sorry you walked in on us,
Mom. But you've got everything wrong. It's nothing like that.”

I want to get dressed. I can't
bear sitting like this, clutching my clothes. I put my t-shirt on and bend over
to stagger into my panties.

“You're all red!” Mom pulls at my
t-shirt. “What? Don't tell me he beats you up. I can't believe this. Has he
been forcing himself on you?”

“You,” she yells at Luke, “out
before I call the police for assault.”

“It's not like that.” I have to
stop her making it seem like something terrible, what we did.

“What is it like?  You're not
telling me you like it!”

I don't say anything. Luke puts
him arm around me protectively.

“You’re sick, depraved,” she
screams. “My own daughter. How many men have you let beat you? Dear God, don't
tell me you let your father do that? Is that what turned his head so he went
after that young bitch? She looks just like you, you know.”

“No. Of course Dad doesn't hit
me. He's never touched me.”

“Luke,” I plead. “Please, just
go. I'll see you tomorrow.”

I need to calm her down. And I'm
never going to manage that while he's here.

“Over my dead body,” she says.
“This stops right now. You can forget tomorrow. This has gone on long enough.”

“I'll see you tomorrow,” Luke
whispers to me and I say, “Just go,” and I squeeze his hand. I'm used to my
mother. Luke isn't. And I've no idea what she'll say next or how bad this will
get before the day is out.

“So,” she goes on as soon as Luke
goes out and closes the door behind him. “You might like to know your father
has got that girl pregnant. He's never coming back. A young slut just like you.
No doubt you put ideas in his head flaunting your body around behind my back.”

“How can you say that? You know
that's not true. You said Dad didn't think much of me. You said he thought I
was worthless.”

“Worthless. Slut. Trash.
Whatever. You're all those things. I can't stand the sight of you. You're just
like him. Neither of you cares how I feel. It's all me, me, me with you two.
Well, you can forget summer at the beach. We're going home before he tries to
move that slut bitch in there and we're out on the street.”

“Dad's not going to do that.”

“No, he's not, because we'll be
there to stop him,” she says. “You had better get your things packed.”

“When are we going?” I can see my
summer crashing to an end.

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? We can't go tomorrow.
I need a few days. I'm babysitting for Jill on Friday. I can stay here on my
own and come home later.”

“So you can move your trash
'friend' in, you mean? There's no way I'm letting him anywhere near you again.
You're coming with me.”

I know she doesn't care what I
do, how I feel. She's not protecting me. I have something good in my life, and
she wants to ruin it. But it's pointless arguing with her. She'll only dig in
her heels. I know she's just being spiteful, attacking me where I'm most
vulnerable because Dad has hurt her. I don't even think she loves him. It's
only her pride that's hurt. How it looks to her tennis club cronies that he
left her for a younger woman.

I don't want to let her see me
cry. I think she likes to know her words have reached their target. But I can't
help it.

I'll have to get a message to
Luke. I need to see him before I go. I can't let that be the last I see of him
for who knows how long.

“What on earth are you crying
for?” she says. “If you're crying about Luke, you're better off without him.
Once you're not there spreading your legs when he clicks his fingers, he'll
soon find someone else. Men always do. They're all the same. Every last one of
them. It’s just as well to learn that lesson sooner rather than later like I
did.”

I know she's wrong. But I say
nothing. It's pointless arguing with her.

I should have stayed with
Madison, but I could tell she didn't want me there. Her mother is a fucking
monster. I didn't realize from the things Madison said how bad things were at
home. Not that the situation helped any. I guess most mothers would go crazy
seeing their daughter like that. But calling her those names, saying those
things about her. I can't believe that.

I wanted to get that bitch by the
neck and strangle the life out of her and stop her hurting Madison any more. I
hate to think about Madison stuck there, listening to that. I have to get her
out of there. Fuck alone knows how. But I'll do it as soon as I can. Just as
well she's going to college. She'll get away from the evil witch then if not
before.

A truck thunders by, horn
blaring. Shit! I'm not concentrating. Maybe I should stop and get a coffee or
something. I need to calm down and then go home. But I just want to get back,
back to my normal, chaotic, loving family, where people are nice to each other
most of the time. Even when we quarrel, and fuck, we do that a lot, we know it
doesn't mean anything.

Madison doesn't have that kind of
home at all. I see how strong she is, coping with the family she has. She's
quiet and reserved but she's not feeble. It takes grit to put up with that kind
of shit and still smile as much as she does.

Fuck Mrs. Collins. Fuck her. Why
did she have to come home early and spoil everything that was good about today?
We were as happy as clams earlier on, playing like we did. I loved how Madison
wanted to do as she was told, how flirty she was, how she let me be in control.
I can't wait to play like that again. I don't know where we'll go next time,
but we'll find somewhere. We have to.

Madison! Who knew she’d be like
that—teasing me, urging me to punish her? It was fucking awesome to see how wet
she got, to fuck her over that chair, to come inside her.

My beautiful Madison, with her
soft pale skin and little freckles on her nose and those big eyes that always
seem to see right through me. I can't believe I fell head over fucking heels in
love this summer with a girl I met at the beach. I should have told her how I
much I love her. I might have if her fucking mother hadn’t come home.

But that's the last thing I
remember thinking, just as I see the car coming right at me. I slam my foot on
the brake, but it's too late to stop the horrific crunching of metal as my car
hits the other head on and turns over and over. All I can think before the
world goes black is this is what it feels like to die.

Next day, Mom is determined not
to let me see Luke again before I go. When I ask to borrow the car for half an
hour, she insists she needs it at the house so she can pack up. Even if she
didn't, I know she wouldn't let me go.

I just want to tell Luke myself
that I have to leave. I want to see his eyes when I tell him. I need to know
that he wants me to stay just as much as I don’t want to go. I want to kiss him
and feel his arms around me one more time before I go back home.

But Mom is on at me the whole
time getting me to fetch this and that. I call Luke, but he must be working,
and I just have time to send him a text and to call Jill to apologize about
Friday before Mom nags me again to do something.

I throw things in a bag
willy-nilly. I don't care what gets left behind. I know I'll come back here
soon somehow to see Luke, whether Mom likes it or not, and I can get whatever I
need then.

By eleven, Mom has shut up the
house and we leave Sandy Cove behind.

I wonder why Luke hasn't texted
back. He's usually quicker than this even when he's working. I hope his
encounter with my mother hasn't put him off. She's enough to put anyone off.
But no, I know he'll get back to me once he reads my message telling him Mom
made me go back home.

But he doesn't call or text all
day. I keep checking my phone and there's nothing from him. I'm starting to
worry. I call him when I know the restaurant should be closed for the evening
but he doesn't pick up his phone. Why isn't he calling? Does he think those
things Mom said were true? That he was just a summer fling? That I would open
my legs to anyone? No! He knows that was my first time in the forest. Surely he
wouldn't believe her knowing that.

Or is it true what my mother said
about him? Am I so easy to replace? My own parents think I'm worthless. Maybe
he does too.

But that can't be it, I've seen
it in his eyes. I was starting to think I saw love there. I don't think I was
imagining it. We were so good together. I can't believe he doesn't care now
that I've gone. Surely he would get back to me even if it's just to say it was good
but it's over. I can't believe he would leave it like that.

But maybe I don't know him as
well as I think I do. It's only been a few weeks. Maybe he's too much of a
coward to tell me it's over. I know he's left other girls. Lots of other girls.
Why would I be any different?

***

After a week of waiting, I can't
help but think I was wrong about him starting to love me. He doesn't care about
me at all. That's how it looks. But I have to know. It hurts too much to worry
about my pride. I call him again. His cheerful voicemail message tears me in
two. I hang up. What's the point of leaving another message? He hasn't answered
my last three.

Should I call him at the
restaurant? I have to know for sure. I dial the number. No one picks up. They
must be busy, run off their feet, not to take a booking. Perhaps they just
didn't hear the phone. I leave it an hour and call again. A waitress answers.

“Can I speak to Luke?” I ask, my
heart in my throat.

“Did you say Luke? I can hardly
hear you, it's very busy.”

“Yes. It's Madison.”

“Sam, there's a girl called
Madison looking for Luke. What should I say?” I catch, though I'm not sure. She
has her hand over the receiver.

“Another one,” I hear and my
heart lurches. I'm just another girl chasing Luke.

“I'm sorry.” The waitress is back
on the line. “I'm new here. I don't know anyone. Can you call back when the
family are around?”

“Okay,” I say and put the phone
down.

I mean nothing to him. Not a thing.
I'm just one of a string of girls from his past chasing him now. How could I
have been so stupid? Stupid, stupid Madison thinking anyone loved me. Why would
they? I feel so alone. I just want to curl up and die.