BAD BOY ROMANCE: DIESEL: Contemporary Bad Boy Biker MC Romance (Box Set) (New Adult Sports Romance Short Stories Boxset) (128 page)

He kept quiet for a moment before he said, “I’m not a monster, Allegra. I just can’t help what I am.”

I squeezed my eyes shut a moment and took two deep breaths, trying to calm down. He wasn’t asking me to do anything right now.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” I said, looking at him even though it was too dark to see him. “All I’m saying is that I don’t have what it takes to be anyone’s Alpha. I know what an alpha does, and I can’t keep your pack safe.”

I focused on my heart, trying to keep it steady, to keep my breathing deep. To push the panic away. But it wouldn’t go, not because of his words, but because of what his voice held, what hung between the lines. That this wasn’t over yet. It was only starting. And it was going to be a hell of a ride, especially with me as the official alpha’s mate. What was I going to do with six wolves?

Chapter 1

Allegra

Being a military wife has never been easy. There are countless days alone, where the only thing you really have of your husband to hold onto is your memories of him. And the knowledge that he’s out there somewhere, and he will come back to you.

Being a military wife of a werewolf is even harder, not just because of the animal inside of them that rips free at least once a month, but also because of the fact that they’re so used to hiding half of them, that they get into the habit of hiding all of them.

Reid and I used to have a lot of problems. There were days when he was home from battle that he still really wasn’t with me. I would try my best to be supportive, but at one point it had gotten so bad that I’d wanted to leave.

It’s a big deal for a military wife to be pushed to that point. We’re pretty patient women, I can tell you that.

It was a big story. He was scared of showing me who he really was. I was scared that I just didn’t know who I was married to anymore. It was messy, it was ugly.

But we’d gotten through it.

I’d also unknowingly stepped into the role of the alpha female of the pack. And I’m just a human. How did that happen? Apparently standing your ground in the animal kingdom is a sign of dominance, which I’d only vaguely been aware of. And now they were submitting to me, which meant I had to lead.

Trust me, it sounds about just as scary as it really is.

After Reid had come back to tell me that he wanted to be with me, and we’d kissed and made up, he had to leave again.

I should have known that was how it was going to be. Being an Army Ranger, something I’d only found out about recently, meant that he had responsibilities just as important as I was. And he was on call.

It was months until I would see him again. Months in which I could think about how things had changed. Think about what it meant for me, where I stood with the pack.

I’d gone from a housewife selling beauty products to neighboring military wives, to the alpha’s mate, head of a werewolf pack. And I was just a human. I’d had months to get my head around that.

When I stood on the platform, waiting for the buses to unload, my stomach bunched in a tight fist of knots. I was nervous to see him. I was nervous to know what this had become. We’d fixed us before we’d left, but that had been months ago. And that had been without all the added extras of having wolves want to submit to me.

I spotted him in the crowd. He was tall and proud, and he looked even more muscular than the last time I’d seen him. Like he’d spent all his time away lifting weights. His hair was a golden blond, bleached to a light wheat a color by the sun, and his skin was tan.

He smiled when he saw me, his green eyes glittering, and I felt the warmth of him before he touched me. I put his arms around my waist and pulled me against his body. The moment he touched me a wave of heat surged through my body and the fine hairs on my arms and on my neck stood on end. It was like a burst of power, strong enough that it made me gasp.

Reid seemed unaware of it. He nuzzled my neck and when he pulled away and looked at me again his eyes were softer than I’ve seen then in a long time.

“I missed you,” he said. “It’s good to be home.” It’s good to be home, his words pulled me out of my daze. Had he ever said that? He stepped back and glanced around him and I felt his presence like a line of heat in my body even though he wasn’t touching me anymore. His eyes were searching the crowd, for what I didn’t know, but I felt his need. A pull that tugged at me.

“Reid?” I asked, and he turned to me again.

“Let’s go,” he said. He picked up his huge camo-colored bag with one hand like it weighed nothing. He took my hand in his free hand and laced his fingers through mine, that same burst of power flowed through the contact, but then it simmered down to a gentle hum, like I was touching an electric current.

We drove in silence most of the way. It wasn’t strained, it was comfortable. I kept my attention on the power that I felt between us. It had never been there before, not like this. Maybe at times when he lost his temper. But never like this when we were just meeting up, or holding hands, or driving together.

“Can you feel that?” I asked after a while.

“Feel what?” he asked and glanced at me before turning his eyes back to the road.

“It’s like a current.”

He frowned slightly. “Can you feel it?”

I nodded. He was quiet for long enough that I thought he wouldn’t answer me. But then he spoke again.

“If you can feel that, you’re there,” he said.

“Where?

“Where you should be, in position as my mate in the pack. I didn’t think a human would be able to feel it, but I’ve heard stories before.”

His conversation was half-cryptic and it made me feel left out. I shook my head, closed my eyes, took a deep breath and opened them again. The power was rising in the car, pressing down on me like a hand.

“Is this the magic?” I asked, my voice breathy, almost a whisper.

“It is,” Reid said, and his face was serious, like it wasn’t the best news. “I wanted to talk with you about your role in our pack.”

“Oh?” I said and my voice sounded thin. Dread filled my body.

“I want to invite the boys over later. We usually meet in the woods but I think it would be good if you met them.”

“I’ve already met them,” I said. I wasn’t sure I wanted a lot of army guys in my house the first night of Reid’s homecoming.

“You haven’t met them as your wolves yet. You just know them as people. If we’re going to do this, and I mean really do this, you need to take your place among us now. Besides, there are two wolves you haven’t met yet.”

“I don’t know, Reid. I don’t even know what the hell I’m doing.” I was starting to panic. It had all been good and well that I’d stood up for myself among the wolves so many months ago. I’d taken the authority and ordered them to do things, to stand down from a bad situation. They’d listened, accepted my authority as Reid’s wife. Reid was their alpha, which put me at second in command.

That had been great, especially when the big boys backed down because little ol’ me had said so. But being the leader of a pack of wolves?

“I’m just a human, Reid,” I said.

He nodded because he knew. I was just scared he didn’t realize what that meant anymore. He hadn’t been just a human for a very long time.

“I know. But it has happened before. There have been humans in history that have taken their place in a wolf pack. Or among vampires. They’ve accepted the monsters in the people they knew, and that’s the first step. You’ve already done that.”

Monsters? It was fine to accept my husband and his unfortunate changes. But I didn’t want to refer to them as monsters. Somehow that made it all feel wrong. It made me want to squeeze my eyes shut, hide under the covers, call for someone to tell me it was all just a dream. I suddenly wished I’d never stood up to them that day. If this was what it meant, that I had to suddenly control a pack of six – or eight? – wolves, I wasn’t so sure anymore. But then again, if I hadn’t done that, Reid and I might never have worked out.

And losing him was a lot worse than having to deal with a couple of pups. I chuckled at the thought. Pups that could tear my head off.

Reid reached out his hand and put it on mine. Magic snapped where his skin touched mine, more like an electric shock than a hum this time. I jerked my hand away and rubbed it. 

“Sorry,” Reid said, like he’d done it. Which made me wonder if he did.

The evening was watered down in light of what was going to happen later. The food tasted like cardboard to me and I struggled to swallow it down. I didn’t want to meet a pack of werewolves. I didn’t want to take a stand and become their second.

When I said as much to Reid, he put his fork down gently and folded his hands on the table.

“Baby, you can’t back out of it now.”

I didn’t like those words.

“Can’t, or shouldn’t?” I asked.

Reid looked down at his half-eaten plate and then back up at me again.

“Just give them a chance. Don’t knock it until you try it. You don’t know anything about this side of my life. It’s not as bad as it sounds. We’re just wolves, sweetheart. Not monsters.”

Right. “You told me earlier that I’d already accepted the monsters. That was what you really were.” I sounded accusing but I couldn’t help it. I was supposed to feel comfortable around a bunch of wolves? I used to, but that was before I had to be one of them. Minus the magic and the power. I also realized that he hadn’t answered my question. It made the nervousness that much worse.

When Reid touched my hand, I jumped.

“Don’t worry,” he said. He held onto my hand, looked into my eyes, and his eyes changed. The green bled out until it was a pale blue, and they became drowning deep. I felt the fear leave me, like it was being pulled out in one thin line. Reid was doing it. And I was very aware of a lot more than just emotions. It was like I’d developed a sixth sense.

“I don’t know if I like this,” I said.

When I looked into his eyes again, I saw the beast slide behind them, the wolf close to the surface. I knew those eyes. I’d feared them once, when he’d lost control and nearly strangled me.

Now it was just a sign that his beast was there. It wasn’t a threat.

“What did you do?” I asked when I finally let go of my hand. I was calmer, now. I still felt panic swirl inside of me, but it was different. Sedate.

“I took the edge of,” he said. “It’s my job as alpha to protect the pack. I can draw power and I can give power.”

I shook my head and closed my eyes.

“That’s not supposed to work with me,” I said.

Too much. It was all too much. I suddenly realized that having months to get my head around the concept just hadn’t been enough. I’d known from the start that Reid was a werewolf. And I’d never really understood what it meant.

Reid wrapped fingers around my wrists, and only then did I realize I was covering my face.

“Come,” he said and his voice was soft and gentle. His hands were warm on my arms. He pulled me up so that I was standing, and folded me against his body. That power surged through me again, but I didn’t try to pull away from it. In a way it was comforting, safe.

“They’re going to be here soon. We have to be ready to receive them,” he said.

I felt the fear build inside me again, but Reid took my hand and we stood side by side in the living room, looking at the front door. The power grew in the room. It was like he was filling his own shoes as alpha.

“They’re here, Reid said. I looked at him, frowning, and then the doorbell rang.

Chapter 2

Reid

Harry was the first to arrive. I’d heard his lazy gate long before he’d rung the bell. And he’d brought Sarelle with him. It wasn’t what I would have chosen, but it was a pack matter, and Sarelle was pack. I couldn’t exclude her now, not when all the males away so often already.

Harry was a redhead with freckles and blue eyes and a smile that made you wonder how he was still a teenager inside. He was the good guy in the pack, the boy-scout that saw the good in everything. On the battle field he was a cracker. And at home he was so tame I could treat him like a lap dog if I wanted to.

It was Sarelle that was the dangerous one between the two of them. She had jet black hair in an A-symmetric cut, and gray eyes that always looked like she was on the verge of a storm. When she turned into her wolf, it was the gun-metal gray fur that told you that she was a force of a nature.

I introduced them, and Harry nodded at Allegra. He was polite and he’d already accepted her dominance. He was a good wolf. Sarelle eyed Allegra and then glanced at me before she turned her eyes down. She didn’t like Allegra.

And I knew why.

I could smell Allegra’s fear. It hung in the air like fog, and her whole body language was submissive. She had her arms folded across her chest and her chin ducked in, looking up at whoever faced her, and not down at them. She wasn’t very tall but she could still be the head of this group if she wanted to.

Sarelle wouldn't just give in to her. She was the newest member to our pack. Harry had gotten serious with her when we’d been home the last time. Before that she wasn’t pack. She was a conversational topic. When I’d let her in I’d thought Harry would be able to control her. The look in her eyes now, like there was a storm brewing, made me doubt that.

The doorbell rang again. It was John. I gave him a hug and clapped him on the back. He was my third, my second until Allegra had decided to step up, and he was like a brother to me.

“Allegra,” he nodded at her.

“Where’s Charlene?” she asked.

“At home,” John said carefully, glancing at me before he carried on speaking. “This is a pack meeting.”

“And Charlene isn’t pack,” Allegra said, putting two and two together. I could feel her hopes sink. Charlene and Allegra were close. They spent all their time together back here when we left. But Charlene was human and she’d made it clear that she loved John for his human side, accepted his wolf side, and wanted nothing to do with pack business.