Bad Boy's Bridesmaid (8 page)

“Where would it
lead?”

“Where do you
want it to lead?” He eyed the desk. “It’s not a bed, but it’ll do.”

Not. What. I.
Meant.

But he had no
idea what I was afraid of. This wouldn’t be another mistake in his arms. I had
to tell him about the baby before we moved too fast.

“Nate, I’m—”

His lips brushed
mine, stealing my words, my breath, and my mind. His kiss nibbled quick and
fierce. Just the touch of him against me shattered my thoughts. The uncertainty
and confusion that volleyed for space in my tummy next to the baby suddenly
vanished.

All that
remained was the kiss.

I hadn’t kissed
anyone since that night with Nate.

I never wanted
to kiss anyone else again.

His lips trailed
over my neck. I accidentally exposed that delicious hollow of my throat. I
never thought a touch could feel as amazing as being filled by him. Every press
of his mouth kneaded shivers through my body.

I mewed.

He liked that.

“What do you
think?” His hands settled at my waist.

What a day to
wear a skirt. It was either foresight or wishful thinking. His fingers tickled
over my thigh. I bit my lip.

“Let me take
your mind off everything,” he whispered.

I didn’t trust
what I’d think about without the wedding and my family to distract me.

Probably how
nice it felt to be touched. How my breathing trembled with every trace of his
lips against my skin. That everything inside me wound into a bigger knot than
the last crisis he’d untangled with a touch, taste, and night of sweet regret.

“This is a bad
idea,” I murmured.

His eyes
darkened. “This is the best idea we’ve had in a month.”

“You kept
count?”

“Five weeks,
three days since I was with you.” He palmed my thigh. The warmth spread right
to my core. “You don’t remember?”

Oh, I counted
the days, but for a much different reason. “You really want me?”

“What do you
think?”

His hand tangled
in my hair, and his kiss pressed me into the desk without a single protest.
Nate grunted at the nest of receipts and papers crowding around me. He whipped
the paperwork away with a swipe of his arm.

My fingers
tangled with his—dark and light, soft and rough. I folded my hand in his as his
breath tickled over my legs. I hadn’t opened them yet. I had no idea what would
happen when I did.

Nate waited
patiently at the edge of the desk, staring at me for a permission that would
ruin
everything
.

Or would it?

A baby came with
its own set of natural consequences, and what we had couldn’t get any more
complicated. Was it really bad if his words, stare, and touch dizzied me in
such a perfect way?

Nate was patient.
He teased my legs, drawing circles up my calves and tickling behind my knee.

“I don’t know if
I can do this…” I whispered.

“Do what?” He chuckled,
and my legs fell open. Did I really wear the white panties with the polka-dot
hearts? “Tell you what, baby. This is a freebie.”

“A freebie?”

“No strings. No
expectations. Let me help you out…and I won’t expect anything else.”

“You…don’t want
to have sex?”

“Of course I
want to have sex. But this service is its own reward.” He arched an eyebrow.
“This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

“Is it?”

“Well, no,” he
laughed. “You ask, and I’ll eat you for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”

“Oh.”

His voice
roughened as he stared at my panties. “But I promise. If you want this just for
you, tonight? I won’t talk about it once we’re done.”

“Why would you
do that?”

“Because after I
take you, you won’t hesitate ever again. I know what you need, and you’re gonna
crave everything I can give.”

His lips pressed
kisses along my thighs, and he knelt at the end of the desk with a smile.

Now or never.

And I wanted it
now.

He stroked the
outside of my panties with a knowing flick. I flinched, and he grinned. How was
it possible my body already rocketed itself beyond reason and modesty? My
panties were
wet
. Shamefully, revealingly wet.

And it didn’t
matter.

Nate didn’t
bother ripping them off. He gripped the material and pulled it aside, exposing
my slickness for his inspection. He didn’t seem surprised. He knew I wanted
him.

“Beautiful…”

His honest smile
shocked me. I stared at the vibrant green of his eyes, the pale blonde of his
hair, the hard angles of his brow, jaw, and chin. He was the beautiful one, but
he admired me like I was something to be worshiped.

His tongue
swiped against me, sinfully pink against the darkness of my petals.

“Relax, Mandy. I
remember what you like…”

His mouth closed
over my slit.

I was lost.

Nothing had ever
felt so good. Nothing ever would again. His lips circled my clit and
practically pulsed. A nibble trembled me like an earthquake, and I nearly leapt
off the desk as his tongue darted inside me.

When did I get
this sensitive?

And how was I
supposed to get on with my life, go to work, and manage the wedding when all I
wanted was to feel Nate’s tongue circling over my swollen clit?

This was a
bad
idea. It had started as a bad idea, and it would end as something worse than a
mistake. Every bounce of my hips aided Nate in delivering me to the most needed
and necessary pleasure of my life. If Nate promised to keep licking me, I’d
never get off the desk.

He growled over
my whimpers. I squirmed, but Nate knew how to keep me still. He licked his
finger and pressed against my entrance, shushing me as he pushed inside. I
groaned, but his profanity bit harder. I clenched over his finger. He stared at
me in awe.

“Fuck, Mandy.” It
wasn’t polite to talk with his mouth full. “You weren’t this hot before. How
badly do you want me?”

“Bad.”

“How much do you
want to come?”

“Too much.”

“You can.
Anytime you want.” His tongue flicked harder against my clit. “You have no idea
how long I’ve wanted to taste you again.”

Dangerous
conversation, but I could do nothing to shift it, not while he lapped at me and
buried his finger deep in my pussy.

“Tell me you’ve
wanted me.” His order was hard to ignore as he curled his finger against that
perfect spot inside me. “Don’t deny it, Mandy. Tell me I’m the best pleasure
you’ve ever gotten.”

Technically he
was. I wouldn’t argue with it. I nodded.

“Better than
your other boyfriends?”

Again, I couldn’t
lie. “Yes.”

Nate sensed me
tense. It was the wrong time for that pleasure, but I couldn’t stop it. I gasped
and writhed and bucked against his finger as he drew long and teasing strokes. 
He grinned as the trembling overtook me. My core superheated, and I bit my lip
to keep from crying out.

The orgasm stole
my rationality, common sense, and ability to lie. I clenched and exploded as
his mouth suckled at my clit.

“Tell me I’m the
best fuck you’ve ever had.”

I couldn’t stop
the truth or my honesty. They blended into one, and I cried out.

“You were the
only one I ever had.”

The orgasm stole
my vision, hearing, and every other part of me that might have been embarrassed
to reveal the truth. Why didn’t it stop my heart? Was it too much to ask for
momentary muteness? Amnesia? Insanity?

What the hell
did I just say?

I crashed hard,
and my pleasure wasn’t there to catch me. My breath drew harsh and ragged over
the desperate heat in my core. I wanted more. So much more.

But first I had
to do damage control.

Nate pulled away
as I shamefully quivered against the desk.

Did I leave a
wet spot? Oh dear God.

His eyes
widened. “That night…were…were you a
virgin
?”

There wasn’t a
classy way to confirm or deny that. I looked down.

“Holy shit,” he
said. “I didn’t know. I just thought you were…uptight. In more ways than the obvious.”

Awkward
. The word he
wanted was
awkward
.

My fingers
didn’t respond quick enough to untuck the panties bound against a very
sensitive place. I swept my skirt over my legs instead and forced myself
upright.

“Mandy…” Nate
ran a hand through his hair, tangling it in the blonde. “Why… didn’t you say
anything. You didn’t even act like…”

“It’s fine.” I
swallowed. “You said we wouldn’t talk about it.”

“No, I said we
wouldn’t talk about what happened
today
. This was sex a month ago. You
didn’t tell me you were a virgin.”

Hadn’t told him
I was pregnant yet either. I was 0-2.

“It wasn’t
important,” I said.

“Like hell. If I
knew, I would have…”

I smirked.
“What? Gone slower? Been more tender?”

Nate leapt to
his feet. “I probably wouldn’t have chased you.”

“Don’t kid
yourself.”

“I would have
made it better.”

“You couldn’t
have made it any better than it was.” I crossed my legs and twisted my fingers
in the skirt. Honesty was supposed to be easy. It was supposed to
relieve
me.
“That night was special to me. And it was amazing. And it was fun.”

Nate set his jaw.
“But?”

“That’s all this
is. All you want.”

“What’s wrong
with that?” He pointed to the desk. “Lay down. I’ll prove how much fun I can be.”

“I need more
than
fun
.”

“Why?” Nate held
me before I tumbled onto my wobbly, satisfied legs. “Fun is what you need.
You’re wound tight, and you’re upset. Let me show you that there’s another side
to life—one that doesn’t require love, marriage, and fairy tales.”

I wanted to
believe him. I wanted to see what he could offer. But all the fun and games and
messing around in the world wouldn’t make my life any easier.

“I have to
believe in fairy tales now,” I said.

It was hard to
say, hard to feel, hard to admit, especially as Nate stared so intently at me,
wanting more than just my excuses. My voice weakened.

Why did it hurt
so much to say?

“And I’m afraid
you aren’t the right prince.”

I parked my butt
in the hospital cafeteria and waited for Rick. He was never too busy for a double
bacon cheeseburger and onion rings.

I didn’t send
him a page. I texted him a picture of the meal waiting for him. Eighteen hours
at the hospital would have made McDonalds look like gold, but I got him the
good stuff. I ordered his favorite from the diner near Dad’s advertising
office.

Rick found me in
the cafeteria, but he didn’t say hello. He didn’t smile. He dropped his pager,
stethoscope, and ID on the table. I half expected the scrubs to come off too.

“For the next
fifteen minutes, I’m not a doctor,” he said.

“…What are you?”

“A man about to
make love to this burger.”

I giggled. “Want
some privacy?”

Rick answered
with a grunt as he took a giant bite. Ketchup and grease stained his lips. He
didn’t care. He woofed down another mouthful.

“And you’re a
cardiologist
?”

“Do as I say…not
as I do.” He mumbled over the mouthful. “Where’s yours?”

My single bite of
a chicken sandwich rested somewhere in the bushes outside the hospital.

“Already ate.”

A handful of
young nurses walked by, sighing as the most attractive doctor in the hospital
gorged himself on fast food. Rick didn’t take a second look at the blonde, but
she scoffed at me.
Meow
.

He inhaled half
of the burger before pausing to wipe his mouth and hands. I arched an eyebrow
as he rubbed the mustard off his wedding ring.

“Ever going to
take that off?” I asked.

Rick was the
most practical one in our circle of friends, but he shook his head. “I’m not
ready yet.”

“It’s been six
months.”

He nodded and
went back to his burger. “Not ready.”

Poor guy. Jada
really broke his heart when she left. I hoped no one told him about her
pictures on Facebook. Apparently she was getting re-married—to the man who
lured her away from Rick. I had a lot of choice words reserved for the happy
couple, but Rick didn’t tolerate anyone speaking negatively about her.

“You know I’m
fine.” He winked at me. “You don’t have to bring food and check on me.”

“You’re
practically
living
here.” I gestured around the hospital. “It can’t be
good for you.”

“As opposed to
what? Want me helping Bryce with the wedding?”

“You’ve already
been through a divorce. I wouldn’t torture you any more this year.”

“That bad?”

I was tempted to
steal an onion ring. The baby wasn’t so keen on the idea. “I don’t know if
we’ll survive to the wedding.”

He nodded.
“Bryce told me about your parents’ fight.”

“It was awful.”

“It happens.”

“Not like this.”
I sucked in a breath. “I’m worried.”

“About what?”

“I…” It spilled
out of me. “They’re getting a divorce. I never thought it’d happen to them. And
you were married, and I swore you and Jada would be together forever. And then
Bryce and Lindsey have been a couple since
high school
, and now they’re
constantly at each other’s throats.”

Rick’s eyebrow rose.
Point taken.

“You’re right,”
I said. “
Lindsey
is always at his throat.”

“So what’s the
problem?”

“Is there anyone
out there that’s actually
happy
with the person they love?”

“Heavy talk for
a burger.”

“I know.” I
apologized. “There’s just…a lot of things happening lately.”

“You okay?”

I hadn’t been
okay since reading the positive line on the test. “I’m fine. I was talking to
Nate and…”

“Wait.” Rick
dropped the burger. “You were talking to
Nate
? About
relationships
?”

“It was pretty
stupid.”

“More than
stupid. Nate’s never committed to anything that takes more work than a grilled
cheese sandwich.”

“He has the
bar.”

Rick laughed.
“Okay, I take it back. But he used the brewery and bar to fuck over his
parents. That takes dedication, but its spite, not commitment.”

“He likes it.”

“Sure, and so he’s
an expert on craft brews. Not relationships. He only puts the effort into
getting a girl in bed. You know that.”

Boy, did I ever.
“He said life isn’t about relationships. It’s about fun and simplicity.”

“I won’t say
he’s wrong, but I don’t think his life is the one
you
want.” Rick
pointed an onion ring at me. “I know you, Mandy. You’re like me. You wanted to
find that right person and settle down and have the life that…a life people are
supposed to have.”

“Is it a real
thing?”

“Hell if I know
anymore.” He shrugged. “I sure as fuck hope so.”

“I’m just
worried what I want doesn’t actually exist. I see my parents, I see you, and
it’s like…everyone’s family is so fragile. I thought you were all in love.”

He stopped me
with a frown. “I’ll tell you right now, I loved Jada. I still do, even if she fell
out of love with me.”

That didn’t make
sense. “How can someone fall
out
of love?”

“Easy. They fell
into it. You can’t control how and when you fall in love. It just happens. No
one says it has to last forever. You can hope, but sometimes it doesn’t work
that way.”

“You’re not
helping.”

“Well, sometimes
it
does
last forever.”

“Nice save.”

Rick laughed.
“Mandy, if I understood marriage and love and women, I’d still be married. As
it stands, I’m thirty. Divorced. Eating fast food between eighteen hour shifts.
I’m no expert.”

“Neither am I.”

“No one is.
That’s the way of the world. You aren’t dealing with anything logical or
rational. It’s all passion—it’s why your parents were together for decades and
now fight like they’re going for blood. That’s just a natural progression of
something that volatile.”

I leaned
forward, resisting the urge to plunk my head down on the table. How the hell
could Rick talk about these things so easily? Like he had it all figured out
and saw the world for what it was?

“Is it stupid to
want that perfect life?” I played with his pager. He slapped my hand away
before I set it off again.

“Nope. You won’t
find it with Nate though.”

I looked up, my
voice shrill. “Nate? Who said anything about Nate?”

He drank the
rest of his soda, slurping what was left in the ice. “He’s been chasing you.”

“Nate chases
after any girl he sees.”

“Well, he’s focused
on you and
only
you lately.” Rick pointed the straw at me. “I’m good
friends with him, but I’ll be the first to tell you he’s a dog.”

“I’m well
aware.”

“But if you’re
interested in him…”

I shook my head.
“I think it’s pretty obvious I don’t know what I want. The only certainty is
that Nate Kensington doesn’t fit into my life.”

“But?”

I met his eyes.
Rick was always the smartest of the group. He was two years older than Bryce,
Lindsey, and Nate, and he had a different perspective than us. He saw more than
we did.

“But what?” I
asked.

“What’s really
going on, Mandy? You’re not acting right.”

Probably because
I was acting for two people. “I’m fine. Just…thinking about a lot of things.
The wedding and my parents going insane is kinda shaking my world a bit.”

He crumpled up
the burger wrapper and bag. His stethoscope wove over his neck, and he clipped
his ID and pager to his belt. He smiled, but it wasn’t patronizing.

“When you want to
talk about what’s
really
bothering you, I’ll be here. Bring me a taco
next time.”

“You got it.”

He stood, though
he rapped his knuckles on the table. “And do yourself a favor? You’re my best
friend, and I love you like you’re my little sister. Forgive me for going
big-brother at the moment?”

“Always.”

“Don’t let Nate
get too close. He’s only after one thing. Okay?”

Rick’s pager
beeped, and he thanked me for the lunch with a wave as he jogged away.

Nate
was
only
after one thing—and he got it. So why was he still chasing?

I had six weeks
until the wedding. Six more weeks to keep the secret before I could sit him
down and tell him what had happened.

I could last six
weeks.

The smell of the
cafeteria food twisted my stomach. I bolted from the table, but I didn’t make
it to the bathroom. I threw up in the garbage can at the edge of the cafeteria,
surrounded by doctors. One patted my shoulder, the OBGYN badge dangling from
her scrubs.

“Don’t worry.”
She somehow knew. “Pregnancy is the most magical thing in the world. It’ll all
be worth it.”

Yeah. Right.

A girl could
hope.