Bartered Bride Romance Collection (44 page)

The thought made him realize he hadn’t yet turned to God with his worry. A pile of hay in a back corner of the barn had often been his place of prayer. He now dropped to his knees. “God, I’m sorry I didn’t turn to You sooner. You know how Corrie is on my mind so much, to the point I’m not even thinking straight anymore. Please, Father, help me keep my mind on You and Your goodness. Whatever is wrong with the sisters, please provide us with all we need to meet their needs.” He continued kneeling for several minutes in silence. He felt familiar peace slip into his soul. With the peace came the assurance that he needn’t hide his feelings from his heavenly Father. Trying to hide from God, in fact, was a waste of time, since God knew his heart anyway. “Father, I want to be able to court Corrie and to win her heart, but both You and I know she’s not ready for that. I couldn’t bear to watch her marry another man for anything less than love, and yet I simply can’t approach her with my feelings when she’s so fragile. If she’s the one You’ve designed for me, I trust You to bring us together in Your way and Your time. Until then, help me be patient and leave our hearts in Your care.”

The burden of past weeks eased from his heart. He had no more assurance of the future than he’d had an hour ago, but now he felt able to leave the unknown with the only One who knew how it would turn out. With lighter steps, he strode toward the house. A lonely figure sat slumped on the steps.

“Hi, Bertie,” he greeted her, playfully knocking askew the battered brown felt hat she so often wore. “Are you okay?”

A kidlike grin flitted across her face as she jammed the hat back in place. Then the somber look returned. “Corrie’s sick, Luke. Matty won’t let anyone else into Corrie’s room, and Bess won’t tell me anything. I know the baby is trying to come early, but they think I’m too young to talk about it. I’m not too young. I love her just as much as they do.” She swiped at her eyes with a fist.

Luke lowered himself to the step beside her, holding back the urge that made him want to charge up the stairs. Even if he did get past Bess, Matty would bar his access to Corrie. He simply didn’t have the right to be at her side. With a clarity that wouldn’t have come to him a day ago, he realized the sister who needed him most at the moment wasn’t the one who occupied his thoughts so frequently. He glanced sideways at Bertie, not wanting her to know he was studying her. Her reddish blond hair hung in braids always on the verge of coming loose. While the eyes of the other three sisters spoke of feminine understanding, Bertie’s told of dreams of adventure, lively imagination, and a spirit that refused to be confined by convention. He rarely knew how to relate to her, with her mysterious combination of womanly appearance but childlike enthusiasm. At this moment, however, he felt an unexpected bond.

“I know how you feel, Bertie.”

The girl’s gaze snapped to his, disbelief, then disdain written across her face. “You can’t know. She’s not your sister. You’re boss of your own ranch, not the youngest of five sisters.”

“No, Corrie isn’t my sister,” Luke acknowledged slowly, hoping he didn’t inadvertently reveal more than was appropriate. “But I’ve come to care a lot for the four of you. However, since I’m not a woman and not related to any of you, they won’t tell me any more than they’re telling you. That doesn’t mean God won’t let us talk to Him about her.”

Bertie played with the end of a braid, seemingly thinking about what he’d said. Then with a defiant expression, she looked into his eyes. “I don’t pray. Not since Mama and Papa died.”

Luke’s heart twisted with the hurt this child-woman couldn’t express. “Well, Bertie, I think God knows exactly what you’re feeling, and His heart hurts with you. When you’re ready to talk with Him, He’ll be ready to listen. In the meantime, you can be certain He understands what you can’t say.” After a few moments of silence between them, he rose and tiptoed through the front door.

Chapter 5

L
uke’s reception inside the house was pretty much what he expected. Jim sat at the table nursing a cup of coffee. If the look in his eyes hadn’t warned Luke the situation was grim, the expression on Bess’s face would have told him everything. Bess wasn’t given to the abundance of smiles Matty usually displayed, but tonight her face looked pinched and tight. Luke knew she wouldn’t tell him much, nor would she welcome any direct comments from him.

He didn’t think she’d welcome a hug, either. He contented himself with pulling out a chair across from Jim and seating himself with the comment, “I’ve been praying, Bess.”

He couldn’t be sure, but it seemed tears might have shimmered in her eyes as she looked briefly at him. “Please don’t stop,” she said as she disappeared into the pantry.

It was just the opportunity Luke was waiting for. Having removed his boots at the door, he slipped soundlessly toward the stairs in his stocking feet. Jim’s eyes both twinkled and warned Luke the ploy wouldn’t work. Luke didn’t expect to get far, but he had to attempt it. He had no intention of trying to see Corrie. Such a thing simply wouldn’t be proper. But perhaps he could get a word with Matty. Just maybe she would tell him something—anything—to ease the knot in his gut. He sensed Bess’s presence at the bottom of the stairs, but he refused to look back. If she wasn’t going to say anything, he wasn’t going to give her an opportunity. At the top of the stairs, he turned left down a hallway. At the end of the hallway stood the doorway to what had been his parents’ room and had recently become Jim and Matty’s. Corrie’s smaller room lay just to the left. He wouldn’t knock on the closed door. If Corrie was sleeping, he didn’t want to disturb her. He just planned to wait around until Matty appeared.

He felt Bess’s presence behind him even before her whispered admonition. “Luke, this isn’t proper.”

She wasn’t saying anything he didn’t already know. “I just want to hear Matty say she’s okay.”

Bess moved to stand between him and the door to Corrie’s room. “I can’t let you disturb—”

Before she finished the sentence, the door opened and a haggard Matty appeared. Locks of her normally tidy blond hair hung around her face. Worry lines radiated from her red-rimmed eyes. She shook her head. “Luke, I can’t let you in.”

“I’m not asking for that,” he assured her though he wished with all his heart he had the right to ask. “I just want to know how she is.”

Bess shook her head as though to indicate Matty should say nothing, but Matty just laid one hand on Bess’s arm and another on Luke’s. “We need a miracle,” she said frankly. “The baby is still moving, which is a good sign, but the longer the labor continues, the more dangerous it is for both Corrie and the baby.”

“How long has she been laboring?” Luke asked. He knew from working with animals how a long labor exhausted both mother and offspring.

Bess’s mouth tightened, but Matty answered. “We don’t know for sure. She hasn’t been feeling well for a couple of days, but she didn’t tell us how bad it was. Last night it got serious enough for her to tell me the details.”

As long as she was willing to talk, he had one more question. “It’s too early for the baby, isn’t it?”

The shadows in Matty’s eyes deepened as she nodded. “Yes, by at least a couple of weeks. That’s why I’m worried. Pray, please, Luke. That’s all you can do right now, but it’s what we need more than anything.”

“Ma–a–atty!”

The pained cry from the bedroom sent Matty scurrying back inside, and it made Luke’s heart feel as if it were breaking. Bess steered him toward the stairs, though without reproof. He felt somewhat better for having heard directly from Matty, even though the information was not reassuring.

Jim looked up from the kitchen table when they returned. Luke explained, since Bess didn’t seem ready to say anything. “Matty says things don’t look good right now, but there’s still time for a miracle.”

“Maybe we should fetch Doc Mitchel.” Jim looked from Luke to Bess and back again.

Bess’s face brightened as soon as she heard the word “Doc.” When Luke growled, “No,” she whirled on him. “Why not? Corrie needs all the help we can get her.”

“Doc Mitchel would be more trouble than help.” Luke tried to keep his voice calm, even though he wanted to strangle his brother for opening the subject. “Jim, you know the doc is barely adequate for basic stitching and bandaging. I don’t want his grubby soldier hands within a mile of Corrie.” He stalked out of the kitchen and reached for his boots. Hanging around here would only get him in trouble.

Bertie still sat hunched on the steps. She turned at the sound of his steps, her hopeful eyes shining in the light that spilled from the doorway. “Is everything okay?”

“I wish I could say yes.” Though every muscle in his body screamed for movement, some kind of action to distract him from the fear in his soul, he forced himself to sit once again on the step beside Bertie. “There’s no way to know how things will work out.”

Even in the dusk, fear shone vividly in the young woman’s eyes. “Is Corrie dying?”

Luke draped his arm over her shoulders and drew her close. Propriety didn’t matter nearly as much as giving what comfort he could. “I don’t know as much as I’d like, Bertie. There are some things that just aren’t appropriate for us to know.” He felt her stiffen beside him. “I know it’s not fair, but it’s the way things are. Right now, what matters is Corrie. Even though we don’t know details, we can be sure that God does. All we can do is trust Him to take care of her and ask Him to give Matty all the wisdom she needs.”

“God didn’t keep my parents alive.”

Luke hadn’t given much thought to the amount of loss Bertie had already experienced in her short life. How could Ellis have sent this child-woman away from the only home she’d ever known? On the other hand, getting away from him was probably the best thing to have happened to her. He knew of nothing he could say that would remove her fear or make up for the losses she’d already endured. He chose his words carefully. “Bertie, I can’t explain why God let your parents die, just like I can’t explain why He let my dad die. He’s too big for us to understand all His ways. But no matter what heartache He allows, we do know for sure that He loves us with a love that’s far beyond our ability to comprehend. No matter how big the heartache, His love is even bigger. He loves Corrie more than we do; I can promise you that.”

Bertie sat in silence, appearing to ponder his words. Finally, she spoke. “Do you love Corrie, Luke?”

In all his thinking about Corrie, he’d carefully avoided that particular word. Hearing it spoken aloud gave him a jolt, even while it felt exactly right. Yet he didn’t know how to answer the question. His feelings shouldn’t be put into words until Corrie was ready to hear them. He sent up a quick prayer for guidance. Then before he could form a reply, Bertie spoke again.

“You don’t have to say it. I can tell you love her. I hope she says yes when you ask her.”

It surprised him how quickly her mind changed directions. At least she was no longer contemplating the possibility of Corrie’s death. She apparently didn’t realize the danger to the baby as well, and he had no intention of alerting her. “I need to ask you a favor, Bertie.”

“Sure.” The customary lilt was back in her voice.

“Corrie isn’t ready to hear how I feel about her just yet. Can I trust you to keep it a secret?”

She studied him with an expression of womanly wisdom, which seemed to imply she knew more than he did. “She wouldn’t believe me even if I did tell her.”

“That doesn’t matter.” Luke made his tone firm. “Corrie trusts me right now, and that’s very important to me. If she discovers my feelings too soon, it could destroy her trust. That would hurt more than if she never is able to love me back. I need your promise, Bertie.”

“Okay, I promise.”

He still didn’t feel comfortable with her knowledge, but the matter had been wrested out of his control. In some ways, she might have not yet matured into womanhood, but her intuition was obviously full-grown. One of these days some besotted young man was going to take young Bertie for granted and end up with the surprise of his life. Luke grinned. Men liked to think of women as the weaker sex, but the more time he spent around women, the less he thought of that theory. They might be physically less strong, but in matters of the heart and soul, they had more going for them than most men could ever hope for. “Are you ready to go inside yet, little sister?”

“No.”

“It’s probably not a good idea for you to sit out here alone, and I need to go down to the barn.”

“I’ll come with you.”

“I wish you could, but young ladies don’t hang out with men in barns.” She giggled. “Now you sound like Bess.”

Her lightning-swift changes between womanhood and girlhood made him smile. “Your sister is right more often than we’d like her to be.” He mentally debated for a moment as to whether his next thoughts should be spoken, then he surrendered to the impulse. “I’ll tell you what, Bertie. If you go up to your room, Bess will probably just be relieved you’re inside where it’s safe. Stay quiet, and you might hear Matty out in the hall. When you do, slip out and ask her about Corrie. She might be able to help you feel better.”