Bastard SEAL: A Bad Boy Forbidden Baby Romance (Contains bonus book Based!) (25 page)

“You know why.”

She stared at me. “Like you said inside. You were pretty busy.”

I struggled to my feet. “Exactly. That’s right. Anyway, Jess and the crew will be done soon, so I better go. See you around.”

“Okay, sure.”

I gave her one last grin and then turned and headed back up to the house. I could feel her eyes on my back.
Whatever, let her stare. If she wants to pretend like nothing happened, that’s fine with me
, I thought.

But it wasn’t fine, not by a long shot. What was I thinking, teasing her like that on film? It was going to be obvious to anybody who watched what I wanted from her.

It was the only thing I wanted from her. That sweet mouth wrapped around my dick, my hands sliding up along the soaked spot between her legs. I wanted to make her whole body shake with orgasms.

As I limped back inside, I resolved myself to being more careful. Even if my days had been a miserable succession of one PT session after another before Brie had shown up, I couldn’t give in to that temptation. I couldn’t risk getting caught, as much for her sake as for mine.

I pushed open the door and caught sight of the crew coming toward me. I put on my best camera-ready smile and prepared myself for more bullshit.

Never-ending bullshit had become my life.

I
avoided
him like the plague after that.

It was surprisingly easy. Despite how hard he had worked to piss me off those first two days, he lightened up and actually seemed to be avoiding me, too. Conveniently, when I was around the house, he was too busy with his physical therapist and the film crew to bother with me. Which worked pretty well, since I couldn’t stand him.

That interview kept playing through my mind. The way he looked at me, his smile, so cocky and sure of himself, and the way his muscles flexed as he adjusted himself to look at me. His tattoos running up his arms like snakes, and the glimpse of his abs I got every time he shifted in his chair.

He was so magnetic, even when he was being a dick.

Cameras aren’t around, Brie baby
, he had said later, after the interview.

But they were always around, and we were both trying to pretend like the most important thing between us had actually never happened, and it was all so messed up. Then again, he didn’t seem particularly ashamed of it. He kept alluding to the kiss, and for a second I thought he was going to admit that he had left for Europe when he did because of me. Instead, I got his usual cocky smile, and he avoided the question all together.

He was right about one thing, though. I hadn’t exactly tried to track him down, either. I had wished again and again that he would call or email or text, just to say hi, even if it was from one stepsibling to another. But he never did, and I was too nervous to try to break the silence. It was as much my fault as it was his.

Despite all that, despite his annoying and frustrating way of looking at me, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I caught glimpses of him all over the house, but we were orbiting each other like two moons on opposite sides of a planet. Maybe I wanted to get closer, but I wasn’t letting myself.

Three days after the interview disaster and I was out by the pool again, scrolling through my phone like usual, bored out of my mind and wishing someone, anyone, was home, when suddenly Jules came strolling down toward me.

“Aubrie, dear,” she called out.

“Hey, Jules.”

She sat down at the end of my lounger and smiled. “How are you?”

“Fine. A little bored, honestly.”

“You’re bored? Even with all these cameras around?”

I laughed. “Not all of us love to be on camera.”

“Oh, I guess not.”

“What’s up, Jules?”

“I know you said you’d help out with my events, so I wanted to finally give you a job.”

I figured this was coming sooner or later. Jules may have been a little daffy, but she never seemed to forget a promise.

“Happy to help out,” I lied.

“That’s so good of you. Well, we’re putting on a little gala, just a little gathering type event, but the space I rented just backed out. I need you to find somewhere that can accommodate, oh, say, three hundred people.”

I blinked. “Three hundred?”

“Yes, well, maybe closer to four hundred. To be on the safe side.”

I sighed. “Okay. I can help with that.”
That’s not how I define small, though,
I thought ruefully to myself.

“Great!” she said, excited. “I’ll send you an email with all the information you need.”

“Sounds good.”

She smiled hugely at me. “So how are you and Lincoln getting along?”

I shrugged, looking away. “Fine, I guess. Haven’t seen much of him.”

“Try and be friends. I know he thinks the world of you.”

I blinked and looked back at her. “Does he? That’s news to me.”

“Oh absolutely! He was always asking about you, back before the accident.”

“He was?”

“Sure he did. Even thought about visiting after he got out of jail. I guess he never did.”

“No, he never did.”

“Well,” she said, patting my leg. “Thanks again, dear. I’m off to make some calls.”

She stood up.

“Okay, sure. No problem.”

“See you later!” She walked back toward the house.

I barely heard her leave. Lincoln was constantly asking about me? Why hadn’t she mentioned it before? Probably because I barely spoke with Jules when I was away at school, I realized. I frowned, and I promised myself I’d make more of an effort while I was home to spend more time with her.

More pressingly, though, was the news that Lincoln thought the world of me. What was with that guy? One second he was pushing my buttons on camera, and the next he was talking about what had happened between us, the one thing we should never talk about. I had no clue what to think. And then he was asking after me like he gave a shit at all what I did? Every new thing I learned about him made him even more frustrating, and strangely that made me want to be around him. I wanted to figure him out, learn what was going on behind the tattoos and the limp and the bravado.

I can’t think like that
, I reminded myself for the thousandth time. He was my stepbrother. I didn’t need to know a thing about him.

Still, there was the matter of the favor Lincoln owed me. I hadn’t thought too much about it since then, but eventually that would probably come in handy. Maybe I could have him do something embarrassing, like wear a dress to PT, but that was childish. Or maybe I could get him to do some of my work finding a venue for Jules. But it wasn’t like I had anything better to do. My phone remained silent, and all my friends remained elsewhere for the summer.

I shook my head, completely unsure of what the right move was. There were so many different things that I wanted from him; for example, I wanted to use my favor to have him pose shirtless in my bedroom for a week. But I also wanted to use my favor to have him never tease me again.

And he hadn’t defined what that favor was supposed to be. Was I supposed to get him to buy me something, or was it something dirtier than that?

And why was I thinking about him without his shirt on all the time?

What a mess. I got up and stretched and headed back up to the house, hoping Lincoln was still busy in physical therapy. I pushed open the doors that led into the kitchen and stopped short when I saw who was standing in front of the refrigerator. Despite being home, I almost didn’t expect to see him again.

“Dad?” I said.

He turned around, surprised. It took him a second to respond, but when he did, his face broke out into a smile and he laughed.

“Aubrie? What are you doing here?”

He walked over and wrapped me in a big hug. I hugged him back, feeling a little tentative and awkward. He was always an expressive man and was never shy with affection, but I hadn’t seen him in a while. Truth was, Dad was barely around throughout my childhood, and I had mostly raised myself after my mom passed away when I was twelve.

“Jules guilted me into being home,” I said.

He stepped back and grinned. “Sounds like her.”

He looked older. I hadn’t seen him in a little over a year, though we checked in over the phone as often as his schedule permitted. He had lost a few pounds, and his hair was longer and graying, but there was something else about him. Maybe there were more smile lines around his mouth and eyes, or maybe it was the healthy tan he already had. Either way, he looked tired.

“Where have you been?”

He sighed and walked back over to the refrigerator, grabbing a soda before shutting the door.

“L.A. for work, mostly. Scouting locations after that. Have you ever been to Death Valley?”

I laughed. “No, Dad. I’ve mostly just been here and Indiana.”

“Well, you should go there when you can. It might not look like much, but there’s so much beauty underneath all that sand and dust. An amazing place.”

I laughed again. “Sure. Sounds great.”

“So what did Jules use to get you here? It’s been, what, three years?”

“Yeah, three years. She wants me to help her organize a few events. She also said you really wanted to see me.”

“I see,” he said, nodding. “Classic parental guilt trip. Well, sorry to say I had nothing to do with it. But I am really happy you’re here.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“So what else is new with you? Semester end okay?”

“Yeah, it did. I told you about the new lab work I was doing. I think my finals were good, but you never know with advanced chem.”

“Advanced chem. The bane of my existence.”

I laughed. “Yeah, mine too.” I paused and glanced toward the back room where I thought I heard a grunt. Probably Lincoln impressing the cute PT girl. “Did you know that Lincoln’s home?”

“I sure did.”

“What’s with that?”

He paused for a second. “Well, you heard about his accident. He needed a place to recover, you know, away from the bullshit. So I said he could come stay here.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Away from all the bullshit? So naturally you started filming everything.”

He grinned sheepishly. “What can I say, sweetie. When I see an opportunity, I seize it.”

I leaned up against the island and sighed. “How long is he here for?”

“However long it takes to heal, I guess. Why, is the crew bothering you?”

“No, it’s not that. I mean, yeah, a little bit.”

“What are they doing? I can talk to Jess, if you want.”

“No, no, really, don’t do that. I’m just not used to having cameras all over place.”

“I get it. Why not get involved with the shoot?”

“I don’t know. Doesn’t seem like my kind of thing.”

“You’re my daughter, of course it’s your kind of thing.”

“But Lincoln’s whole ‘Based’ thing isn’t really my style.”

“Maybe not. But you guys are siblings now. Might be good for you to spend some time with him.”

“Conveniently for you, that means I’ll have to be in the documentary.”

He laughed. “Really, if you don’t want to be in it, I’ll make sure Jess cuts you out of everything. I just think it’ll be good for both of you.”

“Yeah, maybe,” I said, unsure.

He walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. “Listen, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. But Lincoln is going to be around for good from now on. It might be a good idea to get used to him.”

I cocked my head. “Wait, what? He’s going to be around for good?”

“Sure. He’s not going back to Europe.”

That was news to me. Lincoln hadn’t mentioned anything about not going back. I had assumed that his time at home was only a temporary thing until he was back on his feet.

“Why not?”

Dad moved his hand and screwed up his face. “You don’t know.”

“Don’t know what?”

He sighed. “I’m not sure he wants people knowing this, but you’re family. The doctors told him that he can never jump again. They said the impact would likely destroy his legs again.”

I gaped at him. “Seriously?”

“Seriously. I was there when he got the news.”

“But isn’t jumping his whole life?”

“Yeah, sweetie. It was.”

“What about all that physical therapy?”

“That’s mostly to make sure he can walk without too much pain for the rest of his life. He took a really, really bad fall, Brie.”

I could hardly believe what I was hearing. Lincoln’s entire world must have been shattered to pieces; not just his legs, but his future and his career were completely gone. Not to mention the only thing he seemed to really give a shit about was snatched away. And yet he was still working his ass off to get better. No wonder he seemed a little angry.

“Okay, I’m going to go unpack. Keep what I just said between us, yeah? Don’t want to upset the poor guy.”

“Yeah, okay. Sure, Dad.”

He smiled again. “It’s good seeing you, sweetie.”

“You too.”

He turned and walked off, heading upstairs.

I can’t even fathom what he’s going through,
I thought. All that time spent jumping off buildings, risking his life for something I never understood, but something that mattered to him more than anything, was gone. It was all gone in a single instant. I knew he was lucky to be alive, but I couldn’t help but wonder how he felt about that.

I was seeing him in an entirely new light. He was cocky and gorgeous and my stepbrother, but he was also broken. Actually broken. And we had no way of knowing if he could ever put the pieces back together.

Numbly, I walked toward the steps, wanting to take a shower and get changed. But I couldn’t stop thinking about Lincoln, the tattoos that ran up his arms, the way his muscles flexed when he moved, the way he pretended not to be in pain when he sat down next to me.

And whatever it was that drove him to keep pushing on despite everything holding him back.

I
pressed back against her
, hard, our skin slick and close together. I grunted in agony and joy and pushed harder, closer, feeling her breath on my neck. I thought I caught a moan but wasn’t sure. Our limbs were tangled together and I couldn’t remember which part was me and which part was her.

I kept pushing. I wanted to get there. Wanted to reach all the way and finish.

“Is that all you have?” she said.

“Fuck, not even close,” I groaned.

“Come on. Push harder.”

“I’m fucking pushing.”

“Harder!”

I reached out and grabbed her feet and then fell onto my back, panting. Tracy, my physical therapist slash torturer, stood up and laughed at me.

“You big baby. We’re just stretching you out.”

I wanted to snap at her, but the cameras were running. And honestly, I was too tired to think of a comeback without sounding like a child.

“Long day,” I grunted instead.

“Yeah, I bet. You did good.”

She reached her hand out and I took it, struggling to my feet. My legs were shaking, but I didn’t fall flat on my face, which was a big step forward. Well, more like a pained, shuffled step forward, but whatever.

She handed me my cane and I leaned on it, my white shirt drenched with sweat.

“Same time tomorrow?” she asked.

“You know it.”

“You’re doing awesome, Lincoln. Seriously. Most clients I’ve had don’t work nearly as hard as you, and none progress like you have.”

“Thanks, Tracy.”

She smiled and then walked over to her stuff and began to towel off her skin, taking a drink of water. I watched her for a second but then looked away, not interested. Sure, she was blond and thin and had amazing tits, but there was something boring about her.
I wouldn’t have thought that a week ago,
I realized.

Aubrie had changed all that.

I couldn’t get my damn stepsister out of my mind.

I glanced over at Jess and then walked over to my stuff and toweled off, drank some water, and got changed. The cameras followed me, of course, since that was what they were there for. But for some reason, they were pissing me off, and I really wanted just one damn second to catch my breath without having to pretend like I wasn’t in excruciating pain every second of my life.

“Jess, do you mind?”

“What’s that, Lincoln?”

I looked at her. “Do you mind? Just give me a second.”

She cocked her head. “What’s the matter?”

“I’m tired. Can I have a second without the cameras?”

I knew I should shut up and ignore them like I always had. I knew they would probably cut this moment up and make it look like I was struggling and having some emotional moment. But I couldn’t help myself. I was annoyed and I was human. At least I wasn’t breaking shit.

“This is part of it, Lincoln.”

“I know. Just, give me a second.”

She sighed. “Fine, okay. We’ll take five.”

I nodded at her as the crew turned off their cameras and dispersed, probably heading outside to smoke or whatever. Jess stayed behind and walked over to me.

“What’s the matter? You’re usually a lot calmer than this.”

“Nothing. Just a bad day.”

She frowned and stood close to me. “Anything I can do to help?”

I raised my eyebrow at her. I recognized that voice. I had heard it plenty of times before from plenty of other women. It was the “can I fuck your pain away?” voice, and usually the answer would be yes.

But I really wasn’t in the mood.

“No. I’m good. I’m going to take a shower. I’ll catch up with you guys after.”

“Okay. Sure I can’t help?”

I stared. Her lips were parted slightly, and although she was always so stiff and stuck up, she was actually pretty attractive. Long dark hair, bright blue eyes she kept covered with glasses, and just a hint of cleavage. All of which did absolutely nothing for me.

“Positive.”

I gimped my way out of the room as fast as I could, not bothering to look back at her.

A shower meant I had fifteen, maybe twenty minutes at best. I made my way upstairs, losing a few minutes on the slow climb, and made my way down the long hallway toward the far end of the second floor. I opened the very last door on the left and walked inside.

The room was mostly empty, with hardwood floors and a baby grand piano standing in the middle. Back in the day, it had probably been the music and dance room, but it obviously didn’t get much use anymore. I sat down at the piano’s bench, flipped open the key cover, and began to play.

I felt instantly better. Ever since the accident, the only thing that seemed to calm me down was music. That and banging the shit out of the pinball machines downstairs. I wasn’t the best musician, but I had taken lessons as a kid, and I picked it up again when I was living in Helsinki for a few months. A friend of mine was a pretty talented mountain climber who also gave piano lessons on the side to make extra money.  He taught me a lot, made me confident enough to play in front of people at least.

But in that moment, I didn’t want anyone around. The only thing was the music pouring from the keys, the tempo and the noise, my feet tapping and working the pedals despite the pain.

It was my only solace. And I kept it carefully separated from the documentary. I couldn’t imagine mixing the two worlds. They caught me on film playing pinball, but I wasn’t about to let them catch me playing piano.

As I finished the song, just a simple concerto Soren had taught me, the door creaked open. Instantly, I let the sound die off, and I turned around.

“Lincoln?”

Framed in the doorway was Aubrie, her hair wet from the shower. She was wearing a tight black tank top and short jean shorts, and I could see her bra strap standing out from behind her top. A black frilly bra. I could feel my cock begin to stir at the thought of her in nothing but a black bra and matching panties.

“Hey, Brie baby,” I said.

“What are you doing?”

“Jerking off.”

She made a face. “Gross.”

I shrugged. “You asked.”

“Seriously, was that you playing?”

I nodded, a little embarrassed, though I wasn’t sure why. “Yeah, it was.”

She walked farther into the room, her arms crossed. “I didn’t know you played.”

“I dabble. Why, does playing piano not fit in with ‘Based’ Carter?”

“No, that’s not what I meant. I mean, yeah, but I was just surprised.”

I grinned at her, loving how easily it was to fluster her. She frowned.

“Relax, I’m messing with you.”

I turned back to the piano but felt nervous all of a sudden. I hadn’t felt nervous in a long time. I felt her eyes on the back of my head as I began to play a slow song.

“That’s pretty,” she said, and walked over.

I gestured at the bench. “Take a seat.”

She sat as I continued playing. “What is this?”

“It’s a song by Nick Cave called ‘Into My Arms.’”

“Love song?”

“Yeah, sort of.”

“Does it have words?”

“It sure does.”

She smiled. “Sing it for me.”

I laughed. “You sure you want that?”

“Please?”

“Is this your favor?”

“No. I just want to hear the song.”

I sighed. As the song turned around and came toward the chorus, I sang.

“Oh not touch a hair on your head

Leave you as you are

If he felt he had to direct you

Then direct you into my arms

Into my arms, oh lord,

Into my arms, oh lord,

Into my arms, oh lord,

Into my arms, oh lord.”

I stopped, suddenly too self-conscious to keep going. She was staring at me with this weird look, her sexy fucking mouth hanging half open, and her body was pressed close against mine on the small bench. I could feel her warmth and the soft skin of her leg against mine. I had no clue what she was thinking, but I realized how weird I probably looked.

“Is that it?” she asked.

“No, there’s a lot more.”

“Finish it.”

“I can’t,” I said. “I forgot it.”

She frowned. “It’s really pretty.”

I laughed. “Yeah, well, listen to the real thing sometime.”

“Nick Cave?”

“Yeah. The Dark Prince of Rock ‘n’ Roll.”

“Weird name for a guy that writes love songs.”

“You should hear his other stuff.”

She laughed, and I started playing another simple concerto. “So what are you doing here, Brie?”

“What, I can’t talk to you now?”

“You can. You’ve just been avoiding me for a few days. I figured you were still pissed about the interview.”

“I am. I mean, I guess I’m getting over it.”

“Good. Think more about what I said?”

She paused. “Did you know my dad’s back?”

I stopped playing suddenly. Nobody had told me Cliff had come home. He was pretty much the last guy in the world I wanted to see, especially considering it was his fucking fault that I was stuck doing some pathetic documentary.

“No, I didn’t hear.”

“Yeah. I saw him downstairs.”

“That’s good.”

She paused again and looked like she wanted to say something else, but I started to play again. Distracted, she watched as I moved through the song. I made a few mistakes, but I wasn’t sure she noticed them. I wasn’t usually so self-conscious, but there was something about the way she looked at me and the way her body made me feel that made concentrating on the music pretty damn hard.

It was the opposite of calming. It was distracting. Finally, the song ended, and I sat back.

“You’re good at that,” she said.

“I had a good teacher. In Helsinki.”

“Helsinki? You lived there?”

“For a while, yeah.”

“Based Carter. Such a cool guy.” She laughed.

I grinned at her. “Damn right I am. I’m the only guy that can make a cane look sexy.”

“I’m not so sure about that.”

I shifted closer to her and smiled. “You’re not sneaking a peek at me every time I limp by?”

“Definitely not.” She blushed and looked away.

“I’m sure you’re not, Brie baby. Wouldn’t want to do anything wrong.”

Her face snapped back. We were inches apart. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said.”

She was clearly struggling with her temper.“Don’t be an asshole, Lincoln. I was about to tell you that Dad convinced me to do another interview for your movie.”

I blinked, surprised. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“Jess is going to be psyched. You sure you want to?”

“Yes. I mean, no, not at all. But Dad made some good points, and you did too, and I don’t know.” She paused. “I’ll give it one more shot.”

I laughed, surprised by how quickly she changed her mind. She shifted away and stood, crossing her arms again and looking down at me.

“But you have to promise not to pull that same shit from last time.”

I smiled innocently. “What shit?”

“You know what I mean.”

I laughed. “What, rile you up?”

She gave me a look. “Yeah, dick. That.”

“But it’s so easy.”

“Do you want me to do the interview?”

“I can take it or leave it, honestly.”

She shook her head. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Okay, fine. I won’t mess with you.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. No bullshit.”

She gave me a long look, and I wanted to pull her back into my lap and bury my face in her full tits. I wanted to bite her lip and feel the soaking wet spot between her legs. I wanted to fuck her up against the piano and let it crash to the ground as I made her come.

Instead, I said nothing as she nodded her approval. “Okay. Let me know when you want to do it.”

“I’ll see what Jess says.”

She turned and began to walk out. I stared at her perfect ass. “Back to work for Jules now. Don’t hurt yourself limping back downstairs.”

I laughed. “Don’t let her work you too hard.”

I’d rather be the one working you, I thought, but left that unsaid.

She waved and was gone.

I stared at the door for another second before glancing down at my watch. Twenty minutes had passed since I was supposedly taking a shower, and I was sure Jess would be storming up the stairs any minute to yank me out.

Better get in there before she caught on to my dirty little piano secret.

In pain, but still half hard from being so close to Aubrie, I limped down the hall and started the shower. Two minutes later, as if on cue, Jess began banging on the door and demanding that I come out and get ready for the next shoot.

It never ended. But at least Aubrie seemed like she was coming around.

I grinned into the shower water and willed my hard-on away.