BEAST: A Bad Boy Marine Romance (36 page)

A
FTER WE LEFT MY MOM’S
house, we spent a day in Marin County and then took scenic Highway 1 along the coast back to San Diego. I couldn’t wait to come back from deployment and plan a real honeymoon with Annie. No Caribbean getaway, that was for sure. We talked about spending time in Carmel-by-the-Sea, Half Moon Bay, Big Sur, and Santa Barbara. With Gabriel, of course.

Annie wanted to go straight to her parents’ house. I debated convincing her to wait a few days, but I’m sure she’d fight with me. That was fine. I wanted to get this over with.

I dropped Gabriel and Trigger off at Kyle’s house. I didn’t want Gabriel near Annie’s dad, and luckily she didn’t protest. Gabriel was my son now, and I would protect him. Annie called and told her parents we’d be stopping by for her to pick up the rest of her stuff.

My mind raced. I had to be smart and watch what I said. I’d given Matt my word. I was leaving in a few weeks and I wanted to make sure her father was out of her life.

Before I met Annie, I’d planned to apply to the world famous SEAL Team Six, known as DEVGRU. They were stationed in Virginia Beach and it would be great to put distance between Annie and her dad. I’d just become eligible—they required five years of stellar service in the Teams and the selection process took six to eight months. But those SEALs were the real badass SEALs, the ones who took down Bin Laden during Operation Neptune Spear. It would mean more time training, even less time with Annie. But it was a career goal of mine. I would make my decision once I came back from this next deployment, and I knew Annie would support my choice one hundred percent.

The gate opened to Annie’s parents’ house. Last time I came here, I was nervous. This time, I was pissed.

Let’s roll.

We walked up the stairs to the front door. Before Annie could get out her key, the door opened. Her dad stood in front of us, with his nostrils flaring.

“What are you doing here, Annie? I told you not to set foot again in this house as long as you were seeing him.”

What the fuck? I glared at Annie. I guess we both kept our secrets to protect each other.

“I’m not seeing him, Dad. I’m married to him. He’s my husband.”

Annie’s mom popped around the corner; her eyes bugged out of her expressionless face. “Annie! Baby. How could you elope?”

I still couldn’t figure her mother out—did she know her husband had found her “baby” and left her there to die? Of course, this was the woman who couldn’t wait to redecorate Annie’s room. My impression was she cared more about her image than her own daughter, but what did I know?

Annie’s dad didn’t even acknowledge his wife. “Mr. Walsh, I’d like a word with you.”

“My pleasure.” I’d like a word with him, too. I’d also like to put a bullet in his head.

The asshole took me into his office this time. I’m sure he had a gun under his mahogany desk. I wasn’t worried; my weapon was concealed and accessible.

He sat in his black leather chair and poured himself a shot of whiskey from the bottle on his desk.

He bared his teeth at me. “I thought I told you to stay away from Annie. You trying to get more money out of me, boy? Name your price. Then you can tell Annie you made a mistake and get an annulment.”

“I don’t have a price.”

“Fine, you leave me no other choice than to report you for visiting a brothel. Your career will be ruined and I’ll make damn sure you’re kicked out of the Teams.”

I cocked my head. This guy not only left his daughter and grandson to live in hell, but wanted to ruin any chances she had of happiness. I wasn’t threatened. “No, you won’t. Because I’m not the only one with a secret. I know everything about exactly how hard you tried to save Annie. Do the words Neptune Group mean anything to you?”

His posture slumped and he ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t know what you think you know, but you’re wrong. I tried everything to save her. They couldn’t find her; that’s the God’s honest truth.”

“You can lie to me all you want, but we both know you left her there to die. Why? Because you were embarrassed about Gabriel? How can you not love him? He’s your grandson. I’m not an idiot; something didn’t sit right with me. We have eyes everywhere, remember that.”

Eyes steady, he squeezed the whiskey glass, and his knuckles whitened until I was certain something was going to break. “How dare you, you cocky son of a bitch! Come into my house and threaten me? No one would believe you.”

I laughed. “Try me.”

“What do you want, Walsh?”

“Simple, and it won’t cost you a penny. Stay the fuck away from my wife and son. If I hear you so much as text her, I’ll come after you. I’m not sure if your wife is in on this, but if she reaches out to Annie, that’s fine. I’m making this easy on you. Tell Annie you can never accept me as her husband and make her choose between you and me. She’ll choose me. The only reason I’m not telling Annie the truth is to protect her, not you. It would crush her, and she’s been through enough. I refuse to add to her pain. I’m deploying soon, but Annie will be safe here with my buddies. If I find out you try to hurt her or Gabriel in any way, you won’t live to regret it. Understood?”

He nodded but wisely remained silent.

“Good talk.” I walked out of the room. Annie’s mom was talking to her about throwing a wedding reception.

“Come on, Annie. Let’s go.”

“Already? I haven’t packed my stuff.”

“I’ll buy you new stuff.”

Annie’s dad walked out of his office. I gave him a stern look.

“He’s right, Annie. Leave. We don’t want to see you again. I can never accept Pat into this family. You made your choice when you married him. You’re dead to us.”

He must’ve been relieved—after all, he’d already declared her dead once before.

Annie bit her lip, but she didn’t break down. It was almost as if she expected this.

“I love Pat and if you can’t accept him, I don’t care. I learned to live without you once, I’ll do it again. Sometimes I think you both wish I never came back. I was worth more to you dead than alive. Pat’s the only one who loves Gabriel and me. Don’t ever contact me again.”

She clutched onto me and we walked out the front door. I hoped we never had to see them again.

We got into my truck and cruised down to my place. She looked out the window the whole way. Not a single word came from her. I didn’t know what to say.

Finally, I offered, “I’m sorry, Annie.”

“It’s not your fault. I meant what I said in there. I love you and I don’t care what they think. He’ll never accept you, and he always acted weird around Gabriel.”

I placed my hand on her thigh. I was all she had now. I wasn’t one of those men who wanted to isolate his woman from her family and friends. I wished Annie’s family were decent people and I was fine if she wanted to maintain contact with Chris. But as long as I lived, no one would ever hurt Annie or Gabriel again.

I
DIDN’T SHED
A TEAR as Pat drove away from my parents’ house. Why the fuck should I care what they thought about my husband? Pat was the one who rescued me. Pat was the one who treated Gabriel as his own, not some bastard child to be hidden.

Yes, Pat made a mistake by going to the brothel. He knew now hiring a hooker was wrong. He was lonely. But one truth I learned during my time as a prostitute was that all men were not bad. It wasn’t always about sex. Sometimes it was just about companionship, warmth, and affection.

What would my new life look like? Everything was fine now, while he was here. But he would be gone soon. And we’d be alone. I knew I could handle it, I promised Pat I could.

I was scared. What if Pat was killed on his next mission? I couldn’t imagine losing him, losing our newfound happiness, just as we started our life together.

I finally understood all of Pat’s deep concerns about marriage to a SEAL. I’d been through enough pain and anguish in my life. I had to believe, I did believe that true happiness was in store for me. That Pat would be returned to me safely, and we would have a long and happy marriage.

I’d stopped making plans for the future years ago. In the brothel, I lived in the past. Since I’d been home, I’d lived in the present. But now, I was brave enough to finally live not only in the present, but also plan for my future.

I wasn’t perfect—by far. I had a long way to go still in my healing process. But having Pat’s unconditional love helped me love myself.

I
T WAS FIVE A.M
. ON deployment day. I didn’t know exactly how long I’d be gone, but I knew it was at least three months. Annie and I had spent a great couple of weeks together. We were assigned wonderful housing off-base in Point Loma, near Liberty Station. It was a three-bedroom townhouse with a small yard for Trigger. We made Gabriel a great Thomas the Train room and I’d been taking him to soccer and swimming. I introduced Annie to all the SEAL wives and, of course, they loved her. They saw her just how I did, as a strong woman. The SEAL wives had promised to keep her busy while I was away. Maybe I’d been wrong about marriages in our community. Yes, most fail. But the ones that worked were because of the strongest, most loyal women. And I knew Annie was the strongest of them all.

Annie enrolled in college again. She was majoring in sociology, which sounded depressing and useless to me, but who was I to judge? I had a high school diploma and no need for a college degree. Annie also threw herself into yoga and volunteering at the animal shelter. Our love grew deeper by the day, and for the first time since I’d become a SEAL, I dreaded deploying. I hated the thought of leaving her and my son.

Kyle and Vic would be deploying with me. They were both still tragically single, which was ironic since I was the one of the three of us who’d been the most dead-set against a relationship.

Annie stood outside on our tiny balcony. The breeze blew her hair off her face. She was wearing a sundress that showed off her tan skin. She looked up to me, and her crooked smile, which I’d first noticed in the brothel, melted me.

“I’m going to miss you, Pat,” she whispered, careful not to wake Gabriel.

“Me too.” I kissed her slowly. I needed this kiss to take me through a long deployment.

Her arms wrapped around me. She held me tight, and nibbled my ear. I loved it when she did that. She reached out, grabbed my hand and led me to the bedroom.

I was about to undress her and make love to her for the final time before I left. But she stopped me and knelt in front of me on the bed.

She took me in her mouth, and I gasped. I hadn’t let her go down on me since the night in the brothel. I still felt guilty about that day. It changed our lives forever, for the best, but I couldn’t shake the guilt. I hired her. I used her.

I stopped her and made her look at me. “You don’t have to do this, Annie. Ever.”

“I want to, Pat. I’m going to miss you so much it will hurt. I love you. I want to please you. I’m your wife.”

She wrapped her lips around me, her tongue dancing again. My mind flashed to that night in the brothel. We’d come full circle. Same girl, same amazing technique. But this time, instead of imagining that she was my faithful, loving, girlfriend who lived for pleasing me, and that being with me even for just a few months out of the year was worth enduring the loneliness when I was gone, it was real. She was real. She was mine. She respected that being a SEAL was my calling, and she didn’t want to change me.

I pushed her off me. I had something to tell her.

“Annie, I love you.”

She looked me straight in the eye. “I know. I love you, too.”

I meant it. I loved her.

She was no longer my mission.

She was my wife.

G
ABRIEL
AND I STOOD AT the dock. We’d spent all week making Pat’s welcome home sign. It was decorated with trains, American flags, frogs, and seals, the kind you found at the aquarium. In big letters it read, “Welcome home Patrick. Husband, Father and Hero.”

Vic’s mom and his daughter also waited with us. Poor Vic still hadn’t found anyone. He was such a great guy, but he was super picky. At least Kyle was in love, or so Pat said. I’d believe it when I saw it. Supposedly, he’d fallen head over heels for a NFL Cheerleader on the USO tour, one of the San Diego Wildfire Girls. Kyle, Pat and Vic had another rescue adventure—the USO convoy hit an IED and insurgents had taken the women hostage. Unlike my rescue, this one had been all over the news. I kept my eyes glued to the television, hoping to see a clip of my husband. But, of course, they’d managed to evade the media and their names and pictures were kept out of the press. Though this time, credit was given to SEAL Team Seven. Pat said it was just another day at work, completely humble and modest. He, Kyle, and Vic tried to pretend that saving people was no different than pushing papers around in an office. I had to admit, I had a twinge of jealousy knowing that my fine-ass husband had been surrounded by beautiful cheerleaders, who no doubt wanted him. Sexy girls without horrible pasts. I found myself stalking the cheerleaders’ website—eyeing the brunettes, wondering if one of them had caught Pat’s eye. I knew I was just being paranoid and insecure. Still deep down questioning that Pat could ever truly love me. But he went out of his way to assure me how much he worshipped me, every chance he got. I never doubted his fidelity.

Deployment went faster than I’d expected. Pat called every chance he could, which was around every week or so. He sent me letters, gifts for Gabriel, toys for Trigger. He was so kind, thoughtful and romantic. I thanked my stars every day that he was mine.

Gabriel was now in preschool, and I was taking college classes. Only two, because I wanted to ease back into it. The SEAL wives had been so amazing and welcoming—always ready with a casserole or last minute babysitting.

I’d pretty much cut out my old friends, except for Chris. He was still there for me and we met up weekly. He took Gabriel surfing every week. Pat swore he was okay with it, but I knew it made him jealous that another man was playing with his son.

As for my parents, I hadn’t seen them. At all. My mom had called me a few times, begging me to try to work things out with my father, but I wasn’t ready. Not until Patrick was back home. I needed his emotional support and to make sure they accepted him and Gabriel before I agreed to rejoin my family.

Patrick’s mom had come down to visit. I loved her—she was so sweet and warm and Gabriel adored his Granny. She’d even started looking for a job down here. Pat wanted her to move so she could be around for me when he was deployed.

“Mama. It’s Daddy!”

Patrick was standing at the helm of the ship, wearing his sailor uniform, complete with the bib, tie, and bellbottoms. He had at first refused to “man the rail,” but I told him how Gabriel would think it was so cool and how much it would turn me on to see him from the dock. He wanted to make me happy. I knew how much he hated that uniform, but I thought he looked sexy, the way the fabric clung to his ass. My husband was fucking gorgeous.

Pat walked down the gangplank and ran to us. I was so nervous—last time we had greeted him, I didn’t think he’d ever wanted to see me again. Now, we were a family.

He lifted up Gabriel, and pulled me into his strong embrace. A kiss. Long, sweet, loving. His lips, I’d missed them so. I couldn’t wait until tonight to be alone with him.

“Hey babe.” He placed his hand on my belly, now swollen. I was four months pregnant. “How’s our little girl?”

“She’s good. Excited to have her daddy home.” I’d been so nervous to tell him I was pregnant. I’d found out right after he deployed. It was so soon, our marriage, now a new baby. But Pat and I did everything on fast-forward. He was so excited for our new addition, and he went out of his way to tell me over and over how he would never treat Gabriel any different than his biological child. But I never doubted that. And he’d given me the best gift of all—he delayed his plans to apply for SEAL Team Six. He’d instead accepted a three-year assignment as a BUD/S instructor, so he would be home with me, non-deployable for three whole years! He would even be around for the birth of our baby. Kyle and Vic signed up to train BUD/S with him; those men were thick as thieves.

I was about to pepper my man with a thousand questions, kiss him some more, nuzzle his chest. But Gabriel was talking his ear off about soccer.

“Annie Hamilton?”

I turned to the voice, which had called out my former name. My former life. “Can I help you?”

A lady in a fitted red suit was standing there. Clearly not a family member waiting for her loved one. “I’m a reporter for
48 Hours
. We’ve been trying to locate you for months.”

My number was unlisted, and I hadn’t even told my parents where I lived. The only one from my past life who knew how to contact me was Chris. “Well, you found me. Can’t you see I’m busy? My husband just returned home from deployment.”

Pat was now alerted to this stranger talking to his wife. “Who are you? What do you want?” Jesus, back not even five minutes and Pat’s protective streak was already into overdrive.

“My name is Judy Miller. We’ve been doing an investigation on the disappearance of Nicole Race, and we have information that a sex ring had kidnapped her. Forced her to work in a brothel. In Aruba. With you, Annie. We’d like to talk to you, have you go on record. But either way, the story is about to break.”

I dropped Patrick’s sign and his face went white.

“Listen, lady. I don’t know what the fuck you think you know, but you better get the fuck away from my wife.”

The lady eyed my son. I clutched him to my side.

Fuck—she knew.

I swallowed hard. “No, Pat, wait. I’m ready.” I turned to the reporter. The words overpowered my lips, just like they had that night in the brothel when I’d told Pat my name. “Nicole and I were both kidnapped and sex trafficked in the Caribbean. Nicole is dead; she overdosed on heroin.”

Pat’s jaw dropped; the expression I’d seen on his face when he first saw Gabriel under my covers the night he’d saved me.

The reporter shook her head. “No, Annie. You’re wrong. Nicole Race didn’t die. She’s alive. She had amnesia, was living in a small fishing village in Venezuela, no idea who she was. A United States Marine who’d been on vacation with his buddies recognized her, and rescued her. She’s on her way home to the United States now. And her memory has returned.”

Holy fuck! Was she serious? I’d never seen Nicole’s dead body. She’d vanished in the middle of the night and Renzo had told me that she’d overdosed. Pat held me and I collapsed into his arms.

There was no going back now. It was time. Time to heal. Time to tell the world my story.

The story of my life when I hadn’t been Invincible.

When I had been Invisible.