Beautiful Failure (25 page)

“Don’t do this.” He’s running his fingers through my hair, caressing my hand and telling me that this is wrong, that he and I can make our relationship work. He tells me that I make him happy, that losing me won’t do him any good.

I almost break down. I almost tell him that this is irrational on my part and that I would like him to take me out to dinner and tell me everything I don’t know about him, but that wouldn’t change anything.

“I need to be on my own, Carter,” I say, moving out of his lap. I grab my dress and put it on. “I’m sorry.”

He doesn’t move. He sits there stunned, and when I force myself to look into his eyes, I see a world of hurt.

“Yes,” he says, as he moves to the front seat. “I think this conversation would have been better over the phone.”

I remain in the backseat as he puts the car in drive, as he takes me back to my grandparents’ house. I honestly expect him to say, “Bye,” and wait for me to get out of the car myself, but he doesn’t.

Ever the gentleman, he holds an umbrella and opens the back door, reaching for my hand. As he leads me up the driveway and onto the porch, he holds me close to his side—letting his fingers touch my body one last time.

When we make it to the front door, he sets the umbrella down and sighs. “Is that what you really want, Emerald? Are you sure?”

I nod.

“Is this a clean break or am I still allowed to call you?”

Tears are welling in my eyes again. “Clean break.”

He swallows and takes one step forward, pulling me into his arms, kissing me exactly like I knew he would. As he pulls away, I know that there’s something else he wants to say, something else I want to say, but neither of us says a word.

He steps back and motions for me to go inside so he can leave.

I push the door open and look over my shoulder wanting to say goodbye again, but I don’t see a point.

I’ve hurt us both enough.

Five weeks later...

“
Roll Tide
!” Virginia shouts for the umpteenth time today.

She and Henry are walking me around the University of Alabama’s campus, pointing out everything that has to do with the Crimson Tide—the university’s football team.

I’ve never been a huge fan of college football, but I do know that the mere mention of the words “Crimson Tide” in Blythe was enough to make people lose their minds. There wasn’t one business that didn’t bear the University of Alabama’s red and white flag, which is actually quite sad because Blythe is
two hours
away from the university.

“You haven’t lived until you’ve gone to a football game in the South, hun!” Virginia claps. “Henry and I will come back up and we’ll all go to your first one together. What do you think about that?”

“I’d like that very much,” I say and I mean it. I’m still a loner and I know it’ll probably take me a long time to make friends here.

As Henry links his arm in mine and tells me about last season’s championship game, we start to head to my apartment.

It’s three blocks from the main campus and totally overpriced, but they insisted on getting it for me. I’d told them I didn’t want to live on campus or have a roommate and that I was perfectly capable of apartment hunting on my own, but they’re friends with the man who owns my complex and he was more than happy to let me in at the last minute.

“Well...” Henry sighs as he readjusts the AA meeting schedule on my fridge. “We’re going to miss you terribly, Emerald. Please don’t hesitate to call us if you ever need anything.”

“I won’t. I’ll see you in like four weeks, right?”

“Roll Tide!” Virginia laughs. “We’ll be here early! We’re tailgating and all!”

“Looking forward to it.” I can’t help but laugh at her enthusiasm.

The three of us awkwardly move towards one another—embracing for several minutes. When we finally let go, I tell them both that I love them and that I
will
call every weekend with updates, no matter how mundane they are.

This makes them smile, and I walk them to my door.

“Oh!” Virginia reaches into her purse and pulls out a black box. “I forgot to give you this. It came to the house yesterday, but we were all too busy packing your stuff up that I forgot to mention it.”

I eye the box, noticing that there’s no label on the box, no return address. “Thank you. Drive safely.”

“We will.” Henry steals another hug from me before they walk out into the night.

I watch them walk down the path and past the small pond that borders the apartment complex. I watch until they make it to the parking lot, and then I step inside my new home.

Lying across the couch, I stare at the black box Virginia gave to me minutes ago and slowly unwrap it. There’s a letter at the top:

Emerald,

It’s almost been five weeks since I’ve seen you, since I’ve heard from you...I know you’re heading off to college soon, but I want you to know that I’m moving for a while. Nonetheless, if you ever decide to answer my phone calls or text messages, there’s no distance that’ll ever be too far for me to get to you.

I will come wherever you are, whenever you realize that you belong to me and I belong to you.

Carter.

I suck in a breath and try not to cry.

I miss him. Everything about him.

His touch. His kiss. His laugh.

The way he talked to me late at night, the way he fired back sarcasm better than I ever could.

Everything
.

Not a day has gone by that he hasn’t called or texted me at least once, and my heart cracks a little more each time that he does. Nonetheless, deep down, I know I made the right decision.

He’ll see it soon too.

That’s how it always works in the books without the happily ever afters. The characters grow together and then they grow apart; not because they want to, but because they
have
to.

I fold the letter and set it aside, crying when I see what else is in the box.

It’s me.

A small painted picture of me.

I’m wearing my black first date dress, standing in the ocean, and my eyes are gleaming in the sunlight.

There’s a black raven sitting on my left shoulder—looking nonchalant, and at the bottom of my picture there are four words in white cursive:
Ravens always come back...

I wipe a tear away and immediately take the photo into my bedroom, placing it front and center on my mantle. I run my fingers across the paint—oil
and
acrylic, and then I lie down on my bed, staring at it until I fall asleep.

***

“M
iss Anderson, how many more classes are you going to drop?” My advisor rolls her eyes and hands me a new schedule.

“Why do you care?” I stand up. “You’re getting
paid
to do this. Be happy that I’m giving you something to do.”

I’ve only been on campus for a week, and people like her are already pissing me off. Everyone knows that the first two weeks of college are a free for all, a sampler if you will.

The “Add/Drop” period signals fourteen days of unrestricted class swapping. If you don’t like the way a professor’s syllabus looks, or if you find the teacher’s voice annoying, you can drop the class with no penalty and replace it with something else.

Of course, the average college student only changes a class or two at a time, and they usually only drop two or three.

I’ve dropped thirty so far.

Nothing is holding my interest, and I’m pretty sure this newest elective class my advisor signed me up for will be getting dropped tomorrow. The name of it is “405.” There’s no formal title, and if it’s as bad as that “Bird Watching” class she signed me up for yesterday, I’m going to pay her another visit at the end of the day.

Since it starts in half hour, I head over to the building.

As I’m walking, my phone vibrates and I pull it out of my purse. Carter.

I watch it ring and ring, wanting to answer it, but it goes to voicemail. I scroll through the few text messages he’s sent this week and sigh.

No matter what I do, I can’t get him out of my mind. It seems as if every day away from him worsens the pain in my heart.

When I get to the classroom, I see that it’s empty so I decide to call him back.

“Emerald,” he answers on the first ring.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

Neither of us says anything for a long time.

“We need to talk, Emerald.”

“About what?”

“You know about
what
.” He sounds upset.  “I’m sick of this shit and I know you are too.”

I sigh and decide to give in. “I have class in a few minutes and another one in two hours. And AA right after that. What time are you free today?”

“Whenever.”

“Nine o’ clock tonight?”

“That’ll be fine. I’ll call you.”

“Okay...” I feel slightly better already. “I’ll talk to you then.”

“Looking forward to it.”

I smile and hang up.

“Is someone sitting here?” A male voice to my right says.

I look up and see one of the most attractive men I’ve ever seen in my life.

He’s dressed in a simple red polo short and khakis, with the words “Crimson Tide” engraved onto the pockets. With jet black hair, light grey eyes, and a smile that is currently making me melt, he’s fucking perfection.

“So...” He smiles. “Is this seat taken?”

I shake my head and smile back.

“I’m Lucas Pearson,” he says as he takes a seat. “And you are?”

“Emerald.”

“Do you have a last name,
Emerald
?”

“Anderson.”

He pulls out his phone and taps on the screen. “No Facebook?”

“No.” I haven’t had one since I flunked out of NYU and I’ve forgotten that they’re basically the social lifeline in college. “I’ll set one up tonight.”

“Make sure you do.” He flashes his perfect smile. “Make sure I’m your first friend.”

“You probably won’t be.”

“Why not?”

“I’ll probably forget your name by the end of this class.”

“And why is that?” He raises his eyebrow.

“I don’t keep track of every stranger I meet. There are far too many.”

He blinks. “You’ve never heard of me before?”

“Do you
sing
or something?”

He tilts his head to the side and smiles again. “You’re shitting me right?”

“There are thirty thousand students on this fucking campus. Do you really think you’re Mr. Popular?”

“No...” He leans close and looks into my eyes. “But I
am
the star quarterback of the football team. It’s not exactly Mr. Popular. It’s Mr.
God
.”

I roll my eyes and lean back, trying my hardest not to laugh at him.

He keeps his eyes on me as other people fill the room, as they recognize him and give him a high five before taking their seats.

“Why are you in this class?” Mr. God crosses his arms.

“I don’t know. I don’t even know what this class is.”

He shakes his head. “Interpretive Design. It’s a high level course for
talented
people.”

“Then why are you in here?”

His lips curve into a smile. “You’re quite the charmer,
Emerald
.”

“I would say the same for you, but I can’t remember your name. Oh, wait. Mr. God.”

He looks as if he’s about to say something else smart, but the lights in the room suddenly flicker.

I pull out my schedule and scratch this class out with a pen. The last professor that started the class with a flicker of the lights turned out to be a psycho with a twenty page syllabus.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” a familiar voice says and I immediately look up. “Welcome to Interpretive Art Design. My name is Professor Black, and I’ll be—”

Carter’s blue eyes meet mine and everything around me disappears.

He raises his eyebrow, smirking. “I’ll be teaching you
quite a few things
this semester...”

**The End**

Beautiful Temptation

(Book 2 of 2 in the Beautiful Series)

Coming Soon

(A Lot Sooner Than You Think)

––––––––

D
ear Awesome Reader
,

Thank you so much for taking time out of your life to read this book! I hope you were thoroughly entertained and enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

If you LOVED it and have any extra time, PLEASE leave a review on amazon.com, B&N.com, goodreads.com, OR send me an email ([email protected]) so I can personally thank you :-) If you hated it, well....keep that shit to yourself! LOL (Just kidding. Feel free to let me know how I can improve next time!)

I’m forever grateful for you and your time, and I hope to be re-invited to your bookshelf with my next release.

Love,

Mariah Cole