Beautiful PRICK (17 page)

CHAPTER THIRTY

“What the hell do you think you were doing, Caroline? Trying
to get yourself killed?” He continues to chastise me, and I continue to take
it. “And without any help? Five full-grown men. Five, Caroline. What are you:
like a hundred and thirty pounds soaking wet? You have to be fucking kidding
me.” Now he’s pacing. “What if I hadn’t shown up? What if I didn’t know exactly
where you were going? You’d be lying in a ditch somewhere. You know that,
right?” He waits for me to respond, but I assume it’s rhetorical. Of course I
know that: it’s practically how I was when he showed up. “Tell me you know
that, Caroline.”

I quickly nod, trying desperately to stop the tears still
streaming down my face. “I know that.”

“So I have to assume that’s what you wanted. You wanted to
die.”

“No.” I quickly stop him. “I didn’t. It was stupid.”

“Hell yes, it was stupid. Probably the stupidest thing
anyone has done in the history of stupid things.”

I know he’s right, but I can’t handle it any longer. Too
many things are rushing through my mind. Too much has happened. I need a break
from it all.

“Stop it!” I scream, finding my balance as I stand up from
the couch. “Stop talking to me as if I’m a child. I made a mistake.”

“A mistake?” He starts to laugh. “No, Caroline, that wasn’t
a mistake. That was suicide. You don’t commit suicide by mistake.”

“That was not my intention!” I try to defend myself, but I
know my ground is weak. “I just needed to prove something.”

“To whom?” He shakes his head.

“To myself.” I break down. “I had to prove to myself that I
am not weak. But I couldn’t. And yet again, you had to come to my rescue. And I
hate it. I hate it so much. I hate that I can’t take care of myself. And you
know what’s even worse? As he was standing there, with his hands wrapped around
my neck, I finally realized I didn’t care anymore. I realized that
was stupid, and in that entire time, I hadn’t learned
the lesson that was meant for me to learn. But in that moment, I did.” I don’t
care that tears are now spilling onto the ground. It’s all coming out, and I
don’t care what he knows. “I don’t need to be able to beat up five guys. I know
that now. And I can try to apologize, but for what? It’s over. And yet, you
keep yelling at me, and there’s nothing I can do because the stupid thing is
done. It’s over, Johnny. And I love you. And I’m sorry that you had to come to
my rescue, and I hate that I put you through that, and I don’t have any idea
why you continue to do so, but it’s over. It won’t happen again. I’m finished.”

I brush the tears from my face, as I will myself to stop
blabbing.

Johnny is staring at me. That’s it. He’s just staring. And
then his lips begin to move. “What did you just say?”

For some reason, I buckle over in laughter. I don’t know
why, but the entire thing is all of a sudden, hilarious. “I’m not repeating any
of that, Johnny.”

“You said you love me.”

“No I didn’t.” I jump back at him.

A smile lights up his bruised and beaten face. “You said you
love me.”

“No I didn’t!” I defend, although there’s a very good
possibility that he’s right.

“Say it again.” He’s in front of me; his entire demeanor has
changed.

“I’m not going to say it again, because I never said it the
first time.”

His hands cradle my cheeks, bringing my face up to his. His
voice is soft, as are his eyes. “Do you have any idea how worried I was about
you?”

I slowly shake my head. “I never meant to worry you.”

“You affect me, Caroline. Remember?”

Oh believe me, I remember that.

He doesn’t wait for my response. “Promise me you’ll never do
anything like that again.”

I close my eyes, allowing my cheeks to rest in his palms. “I
promise.”

His lips are on mine, and I open to his touch. He’s soft,
and slow, and purposeful, and I happily reciprocate. I moan into him as our
kiss deepens, and I don’t even mind in the slightest that my bruises are causing
me a bit of pain. I want to be touched by him. I want to be held by him. I want
to be loved by him.

“Hey.” He slowly pulls away with focused stare.

“What?”

“I love you too.”

This time I kiss him, and I do it with every ounce of
passion I have kept stirring inside of me since I was ten years old. So maybe,
in a babbling rage, I might have let it slip out that I am in love with him. After
twenty years, why keep that hidden any longer?

Johnny takes my hands in his and pulls me away from the
couch.

“Where are you taking me?” I ask, though I’m pretty sure I
know the answer.

“The bed.” He winks. “You know, we haven’t tried that one
yet.”

“Hmm,” I tease, “You’re right. The living room floor… the
wrestling mat… but no bed.”

“Hey, don’t forget the almost shower.” He smiles, still
pulling me toward the bedroom.

“No, no, no.” I shake my head, knowing exactly what he’s
talking about. “There was no
almost shower.
It did not happen, and it
was not going to happen, no matter what you think was happening in your mind.”

“Shhh.” He shuts me up by planting a kiss on my lips. “Don’t
take away my fun.”

I bite my bottom lip and smile. “I wouldn’t dare.”

I grab the bottom of his shirt and playfully tug until it’s
up and over his head. He’s a little beat up from our earlier debacle, so I’m
careful not to anger any of his bruises.

But boy, oh boy, my fingers want to touch all of him. There’s
something freeing about finally being honest with someone about what you want
or how you feel about them.

“Tell me you’re mine.” I tease.

“Tell me you’re mine first.” He rips my shirt off of me,
making me squeal.

“Nope. You’re to do my bidding.” I devilishly laugh.

“Oh, it’s like that?”

I seductively bite my finger. “It is.”

“Oh, see, that’s where you’re wrong.” He grabs me by the
hips and effortlessly tosses me over his shoulder.

I scream, but out of pure enjoyment. Johnny throws me onto
the bed and crawls on top of me, showering my body with quick, excitable
kisses. I giggle like a child. I am completely, and hopelessly, enamored with this
man.

“Wait, wait, wait.” I pretend to try and hold him off. “You’re
supposed to be doing my bidding.”

He nips at my neck, making me scream out. “When, in all the
time that you’ve known me, have I ever made you think that I play the role of
anything but the dominator?”

I shake my head at him. “There’s a first time for
everything, now isn’t there, kid?”

“Yeah, see…” I start. “You can’t call me ‘kid’ while you’re
trying to take advantage of me.”

I check him under his arm, causing him to waver, which gives
me enough of an opening to sneak out, all the while keeping my grip on his
wrist. He allows it, and believe me, I know he’s allowing it. The move causes
him to flip on his back, and all of
a sudden I
am on top. I wave my hands in the air as if I’ve just won a trophy, but my
joking celebration is exactly what he needs to buck me off of him. I lose my
balance, and end up on my belly, bend over the bed, with him behind me.

“That was fun and all, but…” Johnny’s hand is down the front
of my pants and his fingers quickly make me wet. He teases me with his thumb as
he slips inside. His other hand clings to my breast, hugging me tight into his
warm body. He straightens me up so I’m standing, and continues roughly fondling
me while he sucks on my open neck. I don’t fight. It feels so good, so perfect.
My panting turns to cries and I want to be closer, but he doesn’t allow me to
move from this position.

“Come for me.” He groans into my ear, as he pushes his
fingers deeper.

I give in to the wanting, the desire, and relish the magic
he bestows upon my body. He pulls me closer, and closer still, as I struggle to
keep my feet on the ground. He takes advantage of his height and arches back,
lifting me fully off the ground. It’s too much for me to handle. I can’t hold
it in any longer. I scream out his name as I collapse in front of him.

But he doesn’t let me take a breath. He throws me onto the
bed, as I am, ripping my pants down and leaving them to rest at my ankle. His
hand is on my belly as he arches me up, permitting me to accept him.

And I do.

He grabs onto my hair with one hand and my shoulder with the
other as he quickens his thrusts. I’m overly sensitive from having just reached
orgasm and he takes full advantage of that. He lifts me back up, as we were before,
clutching me tightly to his chest as he drives inside of me from behind. He
moves me up and down and up and down, and I am helpless. I can’t handle it. I
know I’m about to explode again.

I’m instantly tossed off of him and back onto the bed. I
flip over, needing to see his stare.

His eyes, his dark eyes, are full of wanting, and I scurry
back, knowing that although he’s tossed me off, he’s not finished with me. He
grabs my hips, bringing me closer to him, and I permit myself to fall back and
be completely taken by him. He tosses my pants to the side, and spread my legs
out wide. Then, he looks at me.

He looks at all of me.

And he continues to look at me as he slides in and out. He
watches himself dominate me, and his eyes seem to darken as he stretches my
legs out even wider. We stare at each other’s bodies as our thrusts hasten. His
deep voice cries out with each push. He’s fast, and faster, and faster, and I’m
stretched further, and further, and further. My arms brace to the sides as I
feel the climax coming stronger with every passing second. He holds on, not
allowing either of us to finish until he says it’s time. But my head arches
back, and I can’t take it anymore. I scream out just as he collapses on top of
me.

His arms wrap around me, and he squeezes as if he’ll never
let go. I let the moment live, as it’s too good to leave.

Johnny lightly kisses my shoulders, and I run my fingers
through his hair. He stares at me, with the softest smile, and there’s no
question in my mind that I love him.

Talk about a freaking childhood fairy tale come true.

“What are you thinking?” He questions.

Eh, I’ll save this little story for another time. Instead, I
coyly smile and say, “So the bed… it works for us.”

He steals three kisses as we both laugh.

“Up for a shower?” His eyes boyishly dart. “I promise I
won’t make you hold my towel.”

My ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen,
and eighteen year old selves
had no idea what I
was in for.

EPILOGUE

“He offered me a job on his writing team. I get to work on
his next pilot.”

Melissa screams back at me on the other end of the line. “Care
Bear! Care Bear, you did it!”

I think I’m
almost
as excited as she is… or maybe the
realization hasn’t hit me yet. Either way, oh my God!

“I’ll tell you everything tomorrow night when I come over
for dinner.”

“Tell me now!” She pleads.

“You know me, have to keep up the anticipation.” I laugh
into the phone.

“You suck, Care Bear. You know that?”

“Love you, Meliss. Bye.”

I hang up before she has the chance to persuade me to stay
on the line any longer.

“Hey you.” It’s all I hear before Johnny scoops me up from
behind and spins me around. “I hear you have some good new to tell me.”

“What?” I furrow my brow as he sets me back on my feet. “How
do you know?”

“My agent called me.” He quickly kisses me before wrapping
his fingers in mine.

Wait, that makes no sense. “To tell you that
I
got a
job working on a pilot?”

“No. He called to tell me that they’re offering me the lead
in it, so I asked him who was on the writing staff.” He turns to me with a big
smile on his face. “And he just happened to say your name.”

He’s adorably giddy, and I love every bit of it.

“Hold on.” I stop. “Does this mean you’re not going to New
Zealand?” I’m a little too excited about this possibility.

Johnny turns to me and brushes my hair from my face. “Tell
me to stay.”

Oh dear. “Johnny, I can’t do that. I want you to do what’s
best for you.” I hate it, but I have to be honest.

He takes a step into me, resting his forehead on mine. “You’re
what’s best for me. Now tell me to stay.”

There are only so many times I’m able to put up a fight, and
this time, I really don’t want to.

“Stay.” I whisper, ever hoping.

“Then I’ll stay.”

I kiss him, and then I kiss him again, and we steal away
into the trailer.

I can’t stop smiling. I’m sure I look absolutely ridiculous,
but I don’t care.

I don’t care at all.

I grab an apple from a fruit basket that’s sitting on the
table and take a bite. Johnny doesn’t take his eyes off of me for an instant,
and I milk every second I have his attention.

“Throw me a peach.” He motions to the basket.

I toss him a piece of fruit, and start to quietly laugh to
myself as he eyes it, suspiciously.

“Look at this.” He holds it up to me. “They finally got me
peaches without fuzz.”

I set my apple down, walk over to him, and wrap my arms
around his neck. “It’s a nectarine, Johnny. A nectarine.”

He still doesn’t know a nectarine from a peach, but it’s
impossible to hate him for it. Now, I think it’s absolutely precious.

THE END