Beauty Chorus, The (8 page)

‘Pleasure. I think we’re all feeling a bit keyed-up,’ Evie said. ‘Tired, nervous …’

‘Excited!’ Megan added.

Stella looked uncertainly at her. ‘I am rather tired. I think I’ll turn in. What’s the plan for the next few days?’

‘Let’s get settled in here, then first thing Monday why don’t we go to Austin Reed, to get our uniforms measured up.’ Evie drained the last of her glass and handed it to
Megan. ‘Thanks. I’m not having this nonsense about being too busy to get your uniform sorted out. Looking the part is the whole bally point as far as I’m concerned. I’ll
drive us up to town if you like.’ Her eyes scanned the room. ‘Perhaps we can borrow a few things from Daddy’s flat in Chelsea to cheer this place up.’

Megan went through to the kitchen and rinsed the glasses in the old Belfast sink. ‘Won’t he mind?’

‘
He
won’t. My stepmother will be livid, but that’s half the fun,’ she said.

Evie couldn’t sleep that night. Moonlight gleamed around the ill-fitting blackout curtains, and she lay shivering under the eiderdown, clutching two hot water bottles.
She was dying for a wee but couldn’t face negotiating the dark, cold path to the outside loo. As she tossed and turned, trying to find a position that didn’t have a spring sticking into
her, she thought longingly of her bed at home, the plump goose-down pillows and crisp cotton sheets. Every scratch of tiny claws jolted her fully awake. She closed her eyes, tried running through
the procedures for take-off, hoping she would finally drift off. She couldn’t believe how noisy the countryside was. Outside she could hear an owl hooting, and the shriek of a fox.

‘Hush little baby, don’t you cry …’ The song drifted to her from the landing, and her eyes flickered open in irritation.

‘For heaven’s sake, now what? Is this place haunted too?’ she muttered under her breath, wrapping the blanket around her as she sat up. The song continued, and she heard
Megan’s door open. Evie popped her head out. ‘What is it?’

Megan yawned sleepily. ‘Don’t know.’

They crept down the corridor to Stella’s room, and slowly pushed her door open. A sliver of moonlight illuminated the spot where Stella sat in the rocking chair, swaying backwards and
forwards, her arms cradling empty space. There was a gentleness to her face Evie hadn’t seen before.

‘Do you think she can see us?’ Megan whispered.

‘No.’ Evie shivered, tucking the blanket around her neck. ‘She’s sleepwalking.’

‘What’s she doing?’

‘What do you think, silly? She’s singing to her baby.’

‘Let’s try and get her back into bed.’ Megan took a step forward, and as the board creaked, Stella jerked awake.

‘Oh!’ Her hands flew to her face in shock.

‘Megan …’ Evie muttered. ‘You’re not supposed to wake sleepwalkers.’

‘Why not?’

‘I don’t know. It’s dangerous they say.’ She stepped into the room. ‘Are you alright, Stella?’

‘Yes, I …’ She looked around her, confused. ‘What am I doing here?’

‘You were singing.’

‘Singing? You must think I’m mad.’ Her face regained its usual cool composure. ‘I haven’t been sleeping well for a while, but I don’t normally …’
Her mouth twisted, and she balled her fists in her eyes. ‘He was here, with me.’ Her shoulders shook as she started to cry. ‘It was so real, I could smell him.’

‘David?’ Evie asked gently. She put her arms around Stella, held her close until the sobbing subsided.

‘I am sorry. It’s just … I miss him.’ Stella wiped at her cheeks with a shaking hand. ‘I don’t know if I’ve done the right thing. I do hope he’s
alright. Richard’s parents seem lovely, but it’s not the same. He’s so little still.’ Her stomach clutched with anxiety. ‘I keep telling myself that he’s better
off without me.’

‘Nonsense!’ Megan said brightly. ‘Every baby needs his ma.’

Evie dug her in the ribs as Stella broke down again. ‘What Megan means is that you’re being very brave,’ she said kindly. ‘No one knows which way this war will go, and
you’re just trying to do your best.’

‘That’s all one can do, isn’t it?’ Stella’s fingers trembled as she touched the back of her hand to her cheek. ‘It’s funny, when he was born, I used to
… I used to worry so. You think babies are these tough, bonny little creatures but a newborn is such a funny little thing, so fragile.’ She bit her lip. ‘I used to have these
horrible, anxious thoughts, imagined him falling onto the tiled floor at home.’

‘I think all new mothers go through that,’ Evie said.

Stella shook her head. ‘Everyone said to me “Oh, you are coping well!” but what they didn’t see was that behind closed doors I was in pieces. I couldn’t sleep, I
was obsessed by housework …’

‘At least that will be useful here!’ Megan’s laugh tailed away uncomfortably.

‘Was there no one you could talk to?’ Evie asked. ‘What about your mother?’

‘She just laughed and told me to pull myself together. “Have a drink, darling!” That’s what she said.’ She frowned. ‘I thought if I told my doctor how I was
feeling, they would take David away from me.’

‘You poor thing.’ Evie squeezed her shoulder. ‘Are you sure you’re up to all this?’

‘Yes, quite sure.’ Stella pulled her dressing gown closer around her. ‘Flying is the one thing I’m still sure I’m good at. That’s why I applied to the ATA. I
do so want to do something useful, to do something right.’

‘It might take your mind off all that,’ Megan said.

‘I hope so.’ Stella forced a smile. ‘I do worry though. What if David doesn’t know me when I visit?’

‘He’ll know you,’ Evie said. ‘I didn’t see my mother … my real mother for years.’

‘Is she still alive?’

Evie nodded. ‘She’s in America now. New family, new children, haven’t seen her for yonks.’ She hoped she sounded blasé. She hoped no one could tell how much it
still hurt to talk about her.

‘How sad.’

‘Oh, I don’t know, you have to get on with these things, don’t you? I mean, she came to see me, to say goodbye, just before she flew to New York. She didn’t just
disappear.’ Evie’s face fell. ‘I think she’d be proud I’m doing this, unlike Daddy. She always loved flying.’

‘Was she a pilot?’

‘Yes, one of the first women to get her licence. That’s why when an old boyfriend suggested I start taking lessons I jumped at the idea. Daddy loved her spirit of adventure.’
Evie paused. ‘But it’s funny, he’s never liked me flying.’

Stella thought for a moment. ‘Maybe your mother was too adventurous for him. Perhaps he’s afraid of losing you too.’

‘I don’t know how anyone could leave their child …’ Megan began. She stopped short as she realised what she had said. ‘Sorry, Stella, I didn’t mean you.
There’s a war on, it’s different. I was talking about Evie’s ma.’

Evie saw Stella’s brow furrow as she looked at Megan. ‘Ingrid had her reasons, I’m sure. Maybe she just wasn’t cut out to be a mother so young.’ She smiled as she
thought of the last time she had seen her. ‘She was terribly young, and very beautiful. I remember this car turning up one Christmas when I was about ten. This slim, elegant woman stepped
out, holding the loveliest doll you’ve ever seen. It had a beautiful china face and dark wavy hair like mine.’ Evie stretched and walked to the window. ‘I knew it was Ingrid, my
real mother, immediately. I ran out to her through the snow, and she leant down and held me so tight …’ She hung her head. ‘Then Daddy and Virginia appeared. He was thrilled
– I don’t think he’s ever really gotten over losing her – but Virginia flew into a rage. They had just become engaged and I think she thought Mummy was there to try and put
a stop to it.’ Evie pulled aside the blackout curtain and traced a circle in the frozen condensation on the window. ‘That night, when Nanny came in to tuck me up after my bath, the doll
was lying on my bed. I was so excited to show her what Mummy had given me, I grabbed it, and ran towards her. I tripped on the rug, and dropped it. When I turned it over, the face was smashed
in.’ Evie hesitated, her fingertip resting against the cold glass. ‘I ran to Virginia, begged her to help me mend the doll before Daddy saw. She refused. She said, “Let that be a
lesson to you to look after your things”. Daddy was furious with me.’ Evie’s voice grew quiet. ‘I never understood why. He was in such a rage. When Nanny stood up for me,
tried to explain it was an accident, Virginia managed to convince Daddy she was a bad influence on me. She had her sacked.’

‘Over a doll?’ Stella said.

‘She said she was insubordinate. I think she’d just been waiting for her chance,’ Evie bit her lip. ‘With Nanny gone, I was packed off to boarding school. It’s what
Virginia had wanted all along. She had Daddy to herself, and I never saw my mother again.’

The sound of blubbing from the doorway interrupted her story. ‘Oh, you poor thing. I miss my ma too,’ Megan said as she sobbed.

‘Good grief, look at the state of us.’ Stella laughed, wiping her eyes. ‘Come on, why don’t we all bunk down in here for the night? The bed’s huge and this place is
ruddy freezing.’

The girls clambered in together, piling all the bedding in the house on top of them. Megan fell asleep within minutes, and Evie felt the steady rise and fall of her back against her arm.

‘I still can’t feel my toes,’ Stella whispered.

‘Neither can I.’ Evie stared up at the dark ceiling. ‘I’m not sure I can hack this place. It can’t get any worse than this, can it?’

Stella yawned as she rolled over to face Evie. ‘We’ll be fine. We’ve got each other now.’

‘The Three Musketeers?’ Evie laughed quietly.

‘All for one …’ Stella said sleepily. ‘You know what the boys call the female pilots, don’t you? The beauty chorus.’

‘Cheeky devils,’ Evie murmured, her eyes drooping as sleep embraced her. ‘Just you wait. We’ll show them what we can do.’

6

It was still dark when they left the cottage, the windows of the car misty with their breath. Evie rubbed wearily at her eyes. She had slept badly since moving in, and this
morning had woken early after fitful dreams of her mother. She wondered if Ingrid missed her, as Stella missed her child. She glanced vaguely at Megan as she chattered excitedly in the passenger
seat about the car, her first trip to London, their new uniforms.

Stella was curled up on the back seat, watching the hazy landscape appear in the dawn light. She had not been back to London since her night in the shelter, and she thought uneasily of the
orphaned baby, wondering whether he was alive still. As country roads gave way to gloomy city streets she sensed the brooding, turbulent energy of the capital.

Evie swung the Aston confidently along back routes parallel to Regent Street and they parked a couple of streets from the tailors. As they walked past bombed-out buildings, empty playgrounds,
Stella’s palms were damp, her breath shallow. Her vision blurred, and she leant against a shop doorway as a wave of faintness swept over her.

‘Can you hold on a minute?’ Megan ducked into a newsagent’s.

Stella looked down at her feet. A pink bus ticket lay on the ground, ‘Careless Talk Costs Lives’ printed on the reverse.

‘Are you alright?’ Evie asked.

Stella glanced at her. ‘Yes, I’m perfectly fine. A little tired after last night, that’s all.’ She turned away, took several deep breaths. ‘It’s like the Pied
Piper has been here,’ she said. ‘No children, no laughter—’

There was a sudden explosion, then silence, like the city holding its breath. Then came a sound like the crashing of waves on rocks. Stella’s head jerked up as the facade of a building on
a nearby side street crumbled.

Megan reappeared clutching a trade-card album. ‘Wow! Look at that!’ They stopped to watch the dust settle, but the crowd milled on around them. ‘It’s like a doll’s
house,’ she said. Abandoned rooms were laid bare, wardrobes, tables laid for supper, unmade beds suddenly open to the air.

‘I can’t believe what they say about the bombs,’ Stella said, a knot of anxiety tightening in her stomach, ‘that brick walls ripple, glass bulges – it’s like
everything that is solid doesn’t seem real any more.’ She coughed, the smell of burnt brick and damp sandbags filling her lungs. As they walked on she noticed everything was covered in
grey dust. The faces of the people walking towards her were like masks.

‘Isn’t it stunning?’ Evie looked up to the sky as a plane droned over. ‘There’s so little traffic now, you can walk everywhere.’

‘Stunning?’ Stella shot her an incredulous look.

‘It’s so open now.’ She gestured along Regent Street. ‘You can really see all these lovely old Nash buildings properly. The city will bounce back, you’ll see. It
will take more than Hitler to knock these streets for six … Ah, here’s Austin Reed.’

As she pushed open the heavy polished door, a brass bell on the storefront rang. A tailor stepped forward to welcome them. ‘Good morning, ladies, how may I help you?’

‘Commander Gower has sent us to be fitted for our ATA uniforms.’ Evie placed her gloves and handbag on the glass counter as she handed him their chits.

A panicked look came into his eyes. ‘Do you have an appointment?’

‘Well, no.’ Evie hesitated. ‘But it’s imperative our uniforms are made up immediately.’ Megan glanced at her, impressed.

‘All our ladies are on their break. Perhaps you could come back later?’

‘No, I’m sorry, that’s quite impossible.’ Evie stroked a bolt of blue wool on the counter. ‘We’re expected back at HQ this afternoon.’

‘Mr Green?’ the tailor called over his shoulder. From the back room, a short-sighted man in shirtsleeves and waistcoat with a measuring tape around his neck appeared. ‘These
young ladies are here to be fitted for their uniforms. I’ll take down the measurements.’ He made a dive for the order book before his colleague had a chance.

Mr Green nervously fingered his measuring tape. ‘Which of you ladies would like to go first?’

‘You go ahead.’ Stella ushered Megan forwards and sat down beside Evie on the cane chairs. ‘Mr Green looks absolutely terrified,’ she whispered as he gingerly took
Megan’s measurements.

‘And chest, Mr Green?’ His colleague appeared to be laughing quietly to himself.