becoming us (28 page)

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Authors: Anah Crow

BOOK: becoming us
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That was so intense. God, no wonder everyone talked about barebacking like it was a kink all its own. Zac slumped forward against the wall, trying to catch his breath, his whole body still humming with pleasure.

Bryce wrapped his arms around Zac and held him close, his head on Zac’s shoulder. He was shivering still; there was no hiding it. “We should...” he whispered, straightening up.

Zac nodded. They really should clean up and get dressed. They were, technically, in public. He leaned against the wall a few seconds longer, until he was sure his legs would hold him up, and then he turned around and pulled Bryce in for a kiss. Getting dressed could wait just a second longer.

Becoming Us - 142

Bryce kissed him tenderly, holding him close. When he pulled back, his expression was wondering. He stroked Zac’s cheek with his fingertips. “I want to keep my promises to you,” he murmured.

“Oh.” Zac couldn’t hold back his smile. Bryce was just so damn
sweet
. He turned his head to kiss Bryce’s palm, then said, a bit more intelligently, “Let’s get cleaned up and you can promise me that you’ll come sleep in my room tonight, too, so we can do that again.”

“I can promise that.” Bryce kissed Zac on the forehead. Leaning past Zac, he got out his soap, and offered it to Zac. “Here. You first.”

Zac got cleaned up as thoroughly as he could and then got out of the shower, because he knew damn well if he stayed there, he’d end up with his hands all over Bryce, and then they’d never go home. Once Bryce was cleaned up, and they were both dressed, they headed back to the swim house.

***

Zac’s body was still humming with pleasure by the time they got home from the natatorium. He could feel everywhere Bryce had touched him, kissed him, and it felt incredible. He couldn’t believe they’d done that in the
showers
. Sex in public seemed crazy -- especially with Bryce so closeted -- but it had been
so
intense. He could hardly wait to drag Bryce upstairs and do it all again in private, and not nearly so fast this time.

Zac thought maybe Bryce was thinking the same thing, with the way Bryce was smiling at him.

Bryce never stopped surprising Zac with how incredibly sexual he could be, under all the struggle to accept himself. Zac loved getting to be the one to unwrap that gift again and again.

Zac pushed the front door open and stopped. He hadn’t known they were having a party.

The house smelled of pizza and sneakers and the air was thick with noise. It felt like the entire swim team must be here. Zac caught sight of Steve down the hall; Steve waved vigorously and hollered, “Hey, Zac and Bryce are home.” Zac could almost
feel
Bryce, just a step behind him, running into the wall of reality in front of them.

“Zac!” The voice was familiar and so was the person jumping over the arm of the couch and bounding toward him. “Hey, man!” He hardly had time to process before Perry pounced and swept him up into a hug.

“Perry!” It had been months since the last time Zac had seen Perry. They’d talked on the phone after the article had come out, but they hadn’t seen each other since Perry’s graduation party last spring. “Dude! What the fuck are you doing here?” He slung his arms around Perry’s neck and held on as Perry spun them around, laughing.

“I had a job interview north of here.” Perry squeezed Zac tight enough to leave him breathless and kissed him on the cheek before setting him down. “On the way home, I saw the exit for the
Becoming Us - 143

school and thought, fuck, I can’t go by and not see my boys. Bryce!” There wasn’t a hope in hell that Perry could get Bryce off his feet, but he let go of Zac and gave it a try before Bryce could get out of the way. “Christ, are you still growing?”

Zac laughed, stumbling a little as he regained his footing. He ended up with his back to the wall, grinning as Perry squeezed Bryce the same way he’d squeezed Zac. It was a little weird, he realized, his ex-lover hugging his new boyfriend. But, well, it wasn’t like Perry knew.

Bryce managed to recover and groped Perry around the waist, tickling him until Perry squawked.

“Talk about growing. That’s where my last twenty pounds went.” Laughing, he ducked Perry’s swat. “Hey, not my fault you’re slacking, dude.”

“Worst brother ever.” Perry got Bryce in a headlock and scrubbed his knuckles over Bryce’s curls. “You’re uppity with no one to keep you in line, little man.” They really could almost have been brothers. Perry was barely smaller than Bryce, gold instead of bronze and blue-eyed instead of brown, but they had a lot in common.

Their taste for roughhousing was high on the list. Zac got out of the way, heading over to grab a beer off the table. He knew better than to get in the middle of those two. He was small and quick, but that wouldn’t help him with
both
of them all riled up.

Perry’s yowl said the tables had been turned and a moment later, Bryce forged through the handful of people in the living room to dump Perry on the sofa. Perry was laughing too hard to retaliate beyond smacking at Bryce. “Go get me a beer, little man. To think I missed you!” he yelled after Bryce, who was headed in Zac’s direction. Anything else he had to say was lost as Shelly sat on him and offered Kaede a seat beside her on the new sofa cover.

“You want to take that over?” Bryce picked up a beer and handed it to Zac. Like someone had flipped a switch, he was serious. “I’m just gonna take my stuff up. I’ll throw yours in your room.”

“Yeah, sure.” Zac flicked his gaze between Perry and Bryce, trying not to show his worry. He stepped in close to Bryce. “You okay, man?”

“I’m fine. Go have fun.” Bryce’s hand landed on Zac’s wrist and lingered a moment, his thumb stroking the sensitive skin on the underside. “Really.” Just for a second, Zac could see how much Bryce loved him written all over Bryce’s face, then it was gone and so was Bryce’s touch. “I better go study, anyway.”

“Okay. Cool.” Zac smiled and held up the beer Bryce had handed to him. “I’ll see you later, man. Have fun with your books, yeah?”

“I’ll try.” Bryce rolled his eyes at that and Zac had to agree. There wasn’t much that was gonna be more fun than what they’d been up to in the shower. Zac reminded himself not to watch Bryce walk away, no matter how good Bryce’s ass looked.

Becoming Us - 144

He headed over to give Perry his beer, instead. He flopped down on the floor beside the couch, passing over the beer Bryce had given him. “Hey. Can you breathe under there, dude?”

“Yeah, but it’d be more fun if there weren’t a
girl
on me.” Perry pinched Shelly’s ass and, giggling, she dragged Kaede down to sit on the far end of the couch.

“You got cooties now,” she sing-songed, and then she shrieked as Kaede grabbed her around the waist.

“Mmm, cooties,” Kaede growled, kissing her. “Nomnomnom.”

“Ew, gross. Stop being all straight where people can see you!” Perry pushed himself up to lean on the arm of the couch, then wiped his free hand off on Zac’s head. “There. You like girl cooties. Freak.”

Zac snorted and batted Perry’s hand away. “Fuck you, man,” he said, laughing. “Not my fault you can’t appreciate the whole spectrum of hotness.”

There was a thunk as Steve dropped a box with a fresh pizza on the coffee table and Kaede stopped molesting Shelly in favor of grabbing a slice.

“I’d never get anything done if I did that,” Perry said, laughing at Zac. This time, his touch was a brief caress. “Got my hands full with my half of things. You been doing okay?” He gave Zac a little smile that suggested he was asking about more than just school. All around them, people were chattering and laughing; no one was paying attention to their conversation.

“Yeah.” Zac took a sip of his beer and grinned. “Yeah. I’m doing okay. Doing good.” He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows at Perry. “You?”

“Too busy trying to get a job to get up to much,” Perry said, “but training’s going great. Hey, it’s not like I don’t get offers. I ended up changing my email address after the article. Got tired of people offering to convert me, or offering to show me their ‘support.’” He laughed and shook his head. Adonis probably understood Perry’s problems better than mere mortals.

“Support, huh?” Zac laughed and shook his head. He hadn’t had too much response from anybody about his part in the article, except with how it’d affected Bryce.

“Yeah. ‘Support.’” Perry laughed and then took a drink of beer. “You getting any ‘support’ since I abandoned you?” His grin was purely mischevious, but Zac knew there was actual concern underneath. Perry was fun and popular, but he backed it up by genuinely giving a damn about the people around him.

The question brought Zac up short, and he had to scramble not to let it show. “Yeah. I, uh. You know. I do okay.” He took another sip of his beer and then let the bottle hang between his knees.

He didn’t want to lie to Perry. He’d hated lying to Bryce all last year, and lying to Perry felt just as terrible.

Becoming Us - 145

“Ouch. Wrong question.” Perry looked chagrined; apparently, it was hard to lie to the guy he’d spent a year spilling his guts to. Perry switched his beer to the other hand and reached down to touch Zac a little with his cold fingers. “Just lemme know if you wanna talk. I’ve missed you, y’know.”

Zac smiled at that. “I’ve missed you, too, man. It’s not the same now that you’re gone, you know?” Perry had been one of his closest friends, and it hadn’t been an easy adjustment, coming back to school this year knowing Perry wouldn’t be there.

“Big world is way less fun without my guys.” Perry took another drink. “I’m moving out of Mom and Dad’s place when I get work. When I get settled, you should come see me.

Housewarming and all that.”

“Yeah, that sounds cool.” Zac grinned and leaned up to tap his bottle against Perry’s. “Better get on the stick, man. Get yourself a job so I can come visit.” Past the couch, Zac could just make out Bryce slipping through the back of the living room to grab a beer. He had his cellphone in one hand and a frown on his face. That was never a good sign. When Bryce ducked out the back hall, Zac turned his attention back to Perry. He’d go check on Bryce in a couple minutes, give him a chance to deal with whoever was on the phone.

“Yo.” Kaede jumped up on the coffee table, waving his phone. “Crew house just tapped a keg and we’re all invited, y’all. Let’s pack up shop and go party!” His announcement was met by whoops of enthusiasm and applause.

“Let’s move.” Perry sat up, grinning. “Can’t miss the crew party.” He stood up and offered Zac his hand.

Zac let Perry pull him to his feet. The crew team threw great parties. Insane parties. Somehow, crew parties always had the best beer -- and the worst hangovers. “Hey, man, I’ll catch up in a bit, okay? I gotta see a man about a horse.” He didn’t have to piss at all, but this would give him a chance to check on Bryce.

***

After he’d dropped Zac’s stuff in his room -- he’d actually hung up Zac’s wet stuff for him so it wouldn’t get musty -- Bryce was lying on his bed, trying to put how he felt together in his head, but it was too loud to think with everyone downstairs. He should have grabbed a beer. It was good to see Perry again; the momentary thrill of seeing his friend again had interrupted any weirdness he might have felt at first.

But now... he’d kind of thought he’d be jealous, seeing Zac with Perry, but he wasn’t. If Zac and Perry were going to have a ‘thing,’ they’d still be seeing each other now. Whatever was between them, it wasn’t serious like it was between Bryce and Zac.

Becoming Us - 146

And Perry wasn’t
psychic.
It wasn’t like Perry was going to go, “Wow, Bryce is queer!” just by looking at him. Perry sure as hell hadn’t bothered to find out anything last year. Bryce was going to go and get a beer and enjoy hanging out with his friends, and when it was all over, he was going to bed with his boyfriend.

It was going to have to be just one beer. Bryce pattered down the stairs. He still had every intention of rocking Zac’s world again tonight. Fuck, shower sex... so much hotter than he’d dreamed. He made it to the hall before the Imperial March sounded and his phone jittered in his pocket.

Oh. Fuck. Me.
He could dodge it again or he could face the music. Bryce dug in his pocket for his phone. It was time to get this over with.

“Hi, Dad.” Bryce grabbed a beer and dodged some chick wearing too little. “Can’t hear you, just a sec.” He shouldered his way out into the backyard and wished he had some cigarettes. Damn, it was cold out. His feet hit the concrete patio and he was freezing right away. “You got my email?” That he’d written a week ago. Dad had the same turn around time as the labs. There was probably some universal symmetry there.

“I did. You say it would be too much of a distraction to move out at this time.”

“Yeah. Dad, my grades are great. I... I don’t want to do a bad job.” It wasn’t lying. Bryce sat down in a broken-webbed lawn chair and tried to ignore the fact that he was cold. He took a drink of beer, wishing it was vodka. “It’s just a few more months, Dad. Besides, it would look bad.”

“How so?” Oh, God, that was better than him laying down the law.

“Well, Zac’s really popular, Dad. Coach really likes him; his favorite.” Bryce hugged himself and slumped down in the chair. “Look, people will talk if I just up and move out. Steve and Kaede, they’re good guys, just ordinary.” Also true. “It’ll just look shitty. I don’t want to alienate people. Just a few more months. Good grades. Coach is writing me a reference.” There was silence for a while. “I see. I had no idea that the school was so liberal.”

“It’s still a good school, Dad. Everyone’s liberal these days.” Bryce couldn’t help defending it.

“Look, if I leave, it’s gonna kill my social contacts. I don’t wanna have to lie to Coach, I hate that, Dad. I mean, I did better since living in this house, right? I was almost flunking out in the dorms, now I’m doing great.”
Please, please buy it.

“You don’t socialize with him.”

“Dad, he practically lives with his boyfriend. And you know Perry moved out.” Bryce tried to keep his teeth from chattering. He felt sick.
He
was the boyfriend Zac practically lived with. And Perry was right back in the house again.

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