Bed of Lies (32 page)

"I ran away from Memphis after I screwed up everything there."

"No, you came here for Peter."

"Oh, Zach. I'd love to believe that. I'd love for you to believe it. But if my life had been going really well there, I probably would have stayed."

"You could have. All you had to do was never tell Steve about you and me or about Peter, but you couldn't lie to him about either of those things."

"I could have."

"You didn't," he countered. "Face it, Julie. You have a conscience, and you care about your brother and me. And right now, you're scared. But it's going to be okay. I'm going to be here, and when you get scared, you just run to me, and I'll hang on to you so tight you won't be able to get away."

She blinked up at him through her tears, the promise of his words too much for her to take in. She found it in her to make one more tiny protest.

"That doesn't seem very fair to you."

"Well, I'm counting on you holding on to me, too, when I get scared."

"You don't get scared," she insisted.

He looked a little uncomfortable then, and for a moment she thought he'd finally listen to her, that he'd see this would just never work. Then he'd turn around and walk away, and Julie didn't think she could stand that.

It looked like she was going to be one of those awful women who said one thing and then did the opposite. Who wanted a man to talk her into what she really wanted in the first place. She felt mildly guilty about that, even as she threw her arms around him and just held on, not breathing any easier until his arms locked around her in return.

He slowly brought her fully against his body, doing that interlocking thing he did, until she just fit, as if she were made to be the other half of him. To hell with the idea that surely someone else in this world would be so much better for him than she would. She needed him. She'd worry about the fairness of that later.

Julie snuggled against him, reassured by the solid bulk of the man. That wicked little zing of awareness was heating her blood, humming in her veins, and then she was kissing him, as wildly as she had that morning on the grass.

She remembered then he wasn't engaged anymore. And she had a thirteen-year-old living with her. It wouldn't be easy for them to find time to be alone.

She dragged her mouth from his. "Forget about this, about all the talking. We're ten minutes from my house—my empty house—and we have an hour and a half before Peter's done. Take me home, Zach."

He groaned and gave her a scorcher of a kiss. It was going to be okay, she decided. For the immediate future, it would be okay. They'd have this. She'd make it through the next few days or weeks, maybe even months, and she wouldn't worry about what would happen after that. She'd make the most of what they could have now, during this otherwise awful time.

"Come on. Let's go," she said.

Zach pulled back and nearly growled in frustration.

"What?" She could strip him right here, the way she felt right now. It seemed like it had been decades since they'd been together.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Julie."

She frowned up at him. "What do you mean, it's not a good idea? It's a great idea."

"No, it's... There are things you have a right to know before this goes any further—"

"You didn't think so last night," she reminded him.

"Yeah, I did. I just... have a hard time sticking to any promise I make to keep my hands off you, and you... You know what you're doing. We're both doing the same thing."

"And what are we both doing?"

"I'm trying to avoid telling you some things I don't want to have to tell you, and you..."

"What?" She was getting more furious by the second. "What am I doing?"

"You can do this and not be scared if it's just about sex."

She nearly sputtered, she was so mad.

"Julie, I'm not going to let you make this just about sex and nothing else," he said, looking as stubborn as her thirteen-year-old brother had this afternoon when she'd tried to drag him off to the therapist.

"I don't believe you," she said.

"I know. That's part of the problem. You don't believe this could possibly last. You don't believe I really want you, and you're trying to make this into something that won't terrify you. Sorry. If that's what I do to you, you're just going to have to get over it."

"Get over it?"

He nodded, finally announcing, "You can't have me until you do."

"I can't
have
you?"

He looked supremely satisfied with himself.

She wanted to smack him, but she'd been on the wrong side of an exchange like that too many times to ever hit anyone. And damned if her body wasn't still humming along on pure sexual energy, nerve endings practically begging. And she wasn't going to get him?

"This is the way, you'll see," he said.

"The way to what?"

"You and me. We did it all wrong in the beginning and ended up in bed together way too soon, and now we have to back up, take it easy. You have to know you can trust me, and I really do have some things I have to explain to you."

"Something else along the lines of 'I'm not having sex with you'? Because I really don't want to hear it."

"No, it's not about sex," he said, then frowned. "You know, this isn't going to be any easier for me than it is for you. I can't close my eyes without having some image pop into my head of you and me rolling around together on the floor or in that bed in my hotel room. I couldn't sleep there anymore, for thinking of you. I nearly jumped down the maid's throat one morning, because she stripped the bed and took the sheets that smelled like you."

"Don't tell me this," she said.

"It's true. All of it. You in that old-fashioned nightgown last night? Lying on the table? It hasn't even been twelve hours since I left your bed, and already I feel like it's been twelve years. We're going to have to get this right, and fast."

No way.
Julie thought. She didn't think it would ever be right. She'd just have to seduce him. How hard could it be? They practically set the world on fire when they touched.

"I don't think I like that gleam in your eye," he said, finally looking worried.

She took a step closer, her hands pressed flat against his chest. "You can't fight me forever."

"You can't fight me forever, either," he said. "I'm counting on that."

Julie fumed. It was a ridiculous argument to have, him wanting her for... What?
Forever?
That was crazy. And her wanting him in her bed, instead? Did he think he was going to win this argument? He didn't have a chance.

Except he didn't look like a man who didn't have a chance. He looked like a man who argued for a living and won. Like someone who studied his opponent and the case before him, who plotted and planned and outwitted people until he got his way. She knew he was a master at it.

But she was fighting for her emotional life, which made her more desperate than he was. "You're crazy," she said.

"Maybe," he admitted, calm as you please now. "What are you and Peter planning to do tomorrow night?"

Julie frowned at the change of subject. What was wrong with the man? "Probably grumble at each other some more, with more of the stuff he calls music played at ear-splitting volume, so that the whole house shakes." She couldn't wait for tomorrow night.

"My parents are having a cookout. You two should come."

"To your parents'?"

He nodded. "You know, like a date, Julie. I'm inviting you out, and you can even bring the grumpy kid. This way you won't have to be alone with him."

"He went nuts when he saw us together this afternoon."

"When he saw us about to rip each other's clothes off. I can't have him thinking I'm only after you for your luscious body."

"That's all I want you for, Zach," she claimed.

"Liar."

"How is it that I've never seen this snippy side of you?"

He grinned some more. They really had to do something about this arrogant streak of his.

"Come to my parents', Julie."

"Why?"

"Because I want to see you."

She practically shivered at the words. He was getting to her. He knew how much she wanted to be with him.
Be.
In every way possible. And how much she wanted everything with him. It seemed ridiculous to even think of saying,
Couldn't you just sneak into my bed late at night when no one's looking?
Was she really crazy enough to throw away this chance? Even if the chance of it ever working out was infinitesimal?

"I don't know what to do with you," she complained.

"Keep at it. You'll figure it out."

"Zach—"

He kissed her once more, just long enough to set her heart to pounding once again, and before she could get a decent grip on his shoulders and just hang on, he was pulling away.

"Six-thirty," he said. "Don't be late."

"I never even said I'd come."

He dismissed that as a minor detail and went right on. "Now, what else can I do for you today? I feel better when I'm actually solving problems, and I could have sworn there was something in the middle of that little tirade of yours that I could help with…. The house. Did you say someone's trying to take your parents' house?"

"I don't know," she said miserably.

"You don't know if someone's trying to take the house?"

"No, I mean I don't know half of what I said to you. I was upset."

"But someone's trying to take the house?" he repeated.

"Yes," she admitted.

He took a breath. "You know, they teach us about those things in law school. You remember that I went to law school?"

She nodded.

"Somebody sent you some threatening-looking papers?"

"Yes."

"Want to show 'em to me?"

"You're too good to me," she said.

"I haven't been to this point," he said offhandedly. "But I'm going to do better. Now, what else can I do for you?"

Julie shook her head. He said that, and the oddest feelings welled up inside her, ones that left her wanting to lay all her troubles at his feet. But she couldn't do that to him or to herself. No one carried her burdens for her.

"Tell me," he said. "If I can't fix my own problems, maybe I can fix yours."

"Emma says I have to talk to my parents," she blurted out.

"Oh."

"I know. How could I come back here to take care of things and not even talk to them? I don't want to talk to them, Zach, and I sound like a six-year-old when I say that, but that's how I feel."

"Hey, I've been avoiding a few people myself lately. I know the feeling. Is this about Peter? You need to talk to them because of Peter?"

Julie nodded.

"I could go with you," he offered. "And you don't have to talk to them about anything but Peter. Not if you don't want to."

"Emma said Peter needs to know as much as we can tell him about what's ahead for them legally. The arrest. Bond. Court hearings. Anything."

Zach took her face in his hands and waited until she looked at him. He was grinning in the kindest sort of way. "Hello? Law degree. Remember?"

"I can't ask you to go help them."

"You didn't ask, Julie. Remember our deal? You never have to ask, not as long as I can figure out what you need."

"Still..." she said. "I can't stand them. They're horrible."

"I have clients who kill people. I can defend a couple of small-town embezzlers. Especially if they're related to you."

She couldn't help but smile a bit then. "So all my relatives get a break on the best legal services available?"

"Bring 'em on," he said. "I don't have anything else to do for the next fifty-nine days."

"Oh, Zach, I..."

"What?" he asked.

It would have been so easy.

I love you, Zach.

She wanted to say it. God help her, she very nearly did say it.

"Nothing." She closed the distance between them, pulling his mouth down to hers. His wonderful mouth. She reveled in the taste of him, the heat coming off his body. God, she missed him. "Couldn't we just go home and go to bed?"

"No. The jail or the bank. You pick."

"Let's see... Jail. Bank. Or my bed? How many men would pick anything but the bed?"

"Hey, I'm not easy."

No, he was not going to make this easy. But then nothing in her life had ever been easy. And nothing had ever been this good. Terrifying, but very, very good. She wondered briefly if that's what love was. Terrifying and so good.

She put her hand in his. His fingers closed over hers, reassuring and comforting and real. He was here, and it didn't look like he was going away or giving up anytime soon. Everything was changing, and it was possible it might actually change for the better. Peter might forgive her some day, and she might actually do him some good by being here. She didn't care what happened with her parents, as long as she didn't have to deal with them, and Zach...