Behind the Mask (42 page)

Abbi sighed and eased into his arms, wondering how she could bear to be separated from him for even a day.

The following morning, Abbi had just finished cleaning the dishes when she heard Cameron yell from outside, “Abbi, get out here! I need you.”

She threw her cloak around her shoulders and went out to find him sitting on Blaze. “Just what do you need so desperately? I thought you were hurt or something.”

“We need another wild ride, I think.” He reached out his hand and pulled her up behind him. Abbi took hold of his waist and Cameron heeled Blaze into a gallop, going the opposite direction of where they’d gone the day before. Abbi loved the way snow flew behind Blaze’s hooves, and she took great pleasure in sharing it with Cameron.

When they reached a meadow, Cameron pulled Blaze to a stop and was prepared for his rearing back. “That’s quite a trick you’ve taught him.”

“It’s fun, don’t you think?” she asked. Cameron chuckled and she went on, “He likes you, you know.”

“I’m touched,” Cameron said, reaching down to pat the horse’s neck.

“Blaze has always been my best friend,” Abbi said.

“Now he’s mine.”

“Why’s that?”

“He led you to me.” He paused, then observed sadly, “There’s not much snow left.”

“There’s still over a foot.”

“It won’t last long if this sunshine keeps up.”

“Don’t ruin today, my love, by worrying about tomorrow. I’m perfectly content to be here with you right now. Tell me about where we are.”

Cameron loved the way she made everything all right. “In the summer,” he said, “this meadow is covered with wildflowers. One day I’ll bring you up here in the summer and watch you pick handfuls of them. And then I’ll put them in your hair, and you’ll—”

“Put dozens of them in this gorgeous dark hair of
yours.”

“Just try it!” he threatened and laughed.

“I love it when you talk about the future. You’ve come a long way.”

“Yes,” he admitted, “I believe I have.”

Blaze sidestepped impatiently, distracting them from their conversation.

“He’s dying to run,” Abbi said.

“Well then,” Cameron took the reins firmly and urged the stallion forward, “let’s run.”

They laughed together as Blaze galloped the meadow wildly, then Cameron dismounted to give the horse a break and let Abbi ride alone. He marveled at the dazzling image before him as Abbi’s hair billowed behind her and snow flew around the horse’s hooves. Abbi laughed wickedly as she turned to drive Blaze directly for Cameron and he dodged just in time. She tugged on the reins, and Blaze reared back and whinnied loudly.

“Try it again, woman!” Cameron challenged, and Abbi didn’t hesitate. She drove Blaze hard toward Cameron, but he didn’t move this time and Blaze reared back to avoid hurting him. Cameron laughed and pulled Abbi from the saddle, rolling backward into the snow and bringing her with him. He tickled her and she stuffed snow down his shirt, then they lay in the snow, laughing themselves into exhaustion until Blaze sauntered over and nudged Abbi with his nose.

“He wants to play some more,” Abbi said.

Cameron rose to his feet and pulled Abbi up with him, helping brush the snow from her dress. “So do I,” he smirked and pulled Abbi close to him, kissing her with a touch of passion. “Come on,” he whispered, “let’s go home.”

After they’d come through the door of the lodge, Cameron noted where Abbi was standing and said, “Do you remember how we first came face-to-face, standing in this very spot?”

“I remember,” she said, and he backed her toward the wall, just as he’d done then, making her laugh.

“You were terrified,” he muttered.

“So were you,” she said, and he couldn’t argue. Instead, he carried her up the stairs. Sunshine persisted relentlessly through the following days. Cameron felt a growing dread that he saw mirrored in Abbi’s eyes, but neither of them voiced their feelings, as if keeping silent might keep the inevitable from coming to pass.

“Cameron?” Abbi asked one morning as she stared out the bedroom window.

“Yes, my love.” He put his arms around her from behind.

“How much more time have we got?”

He glanced over the top of her head at the ground beginning to appear through the melting snow. “Not much sun hits that crevice. But when the snow is completely gone from around the lodge, it will be passable. Two days; maybe three. I could dig it out now if I had to, but—”

“No!” she interrupted firmly. Then her voice softened. “Let nature take her time.”

“You mustn’t worry, Abbi,” he added. “I have some good advice a very dear friend of mine once gave me.”

“What’s that?”

“Don’t ruin today by worrying about tomorrow.”

Abbi turned in his arms, holding to him desperately. Fear and uncertainty rushed through her in torrents, but she couldn’t bring herself to voice them. She looked up into his eyes. “Is there no way you might come with me when I go?” she asked. “Surely there is a way for you to stay hidden and—”

“Abbi,” Cameron put his fingers over her lips, “even when I do come down, I may well have to stay hidden for some time. But now it’s . . . too dangerous. It’s too soon. We’re simply not ready.”

“We?” she asked. “By
we
you mean the man you’re communicating with?”

Cameron nodded and guided her to the edge of the bed, where they sat close together. “Abbi,” he took her hand, “there’s something I need to tell you. I’ve thought this through very carefully. I want you to know that you can trust Georg. I know the two of you are very close, and he’s quite accustomed to watching out for you and—”

“How do you know?” she asked. “I’ve certainly talked about him, but—”

“Hear me out,” he said. “Georg has let me know that he will watch out for you, and—”

“He’s the one,” she breathed. “Georg’s the man you’re communicating with, who . . .”

“That’s right.”

“That’s incredible.”

“Yes, it is,” he agreed. “The coincidences in our lives are”—he looked into her eyes—“too incredible to be coincidence.” Abbi nodded in agreement and he went on. “Georg knows you’re alive and well, although I’ve told him nothing about . . . what has transpired between us. It’s difficult to put much information on a pigeon.” He chuckled softly. “I just didn’t know how to explain in so few words. What you tell him is up to you. You can trust him completely. Just be careful that your conversations are not overheard.”

Abbi nodded. “I understand.”

“If you need anything . . . if any problems arise . . . he’ll be there for you . . . as I wish I could be.”

Abbi said nothing more, but instead found something to keep herself busy. She had to concentrate on the future beyond this separation. Otherwise, she would go insane.

The following day was so warm that the lodge felt stuffy, and Cameron opened windows to let in the fresh air. Abbi had to bite her tongue to keep from getting angry with him for doing it. Yes, the fresh air felt good, but what it represented terrified her.

That night in bed, Cameron said through the darkness, “You have to go tomorrow, Abbi.”

“I know.” She rolled over and pressed herself into his arms. “But don’t talk about it. Tomorrow isn’t here yet.”

After they made love, Abbi drifted reluctantly to sleep, not wanting to waste a moment of being with Cameron. The bedroom held just a touch of morning light when he bounced onto the bed in his nightshirt to wake her. “Come on! Get up,” he said, pulling at her arms. “There’s something you’ve got to see—right now.”

Abbi groaned and tried to ease him back into bed with her. Cameron picked her up and carried her to the window seat. “Look!” he whispered. “It’s snowing like mad.”

“Oh Cameron!” she cried out in elation and threw her arms around his neck. “I don’t believe it!”

Cameron let out a whoop of joy and pulled her into his arms, twirling around the room with her. Abbi threw back her head and they laughed together with sheer happiness. For them it was a miracle.

The spring snow fell hard and fast, and melted away just as quickly. But Cameron couldn’t begrudge the extra three days it had given them together, and he spent the moments with Abbi as if they were sacred. They both agreed that the added time made them feel a little better prepared to face their separation. Cameron often reminded himself that it was only temporary. He had something to live for, something to fight for. And fight he would!

Coming into the lodge on that third day, Cameron leaned in the doorway, unable to go any farther. “Abbi,” he called. She appeared on the landing above him, looking sad. “You’ve got to go. I can’t justify keeping you here another day.”

Abbi exhaled and took hold of the stair railing. “What difference does a day or two make? How can anyone know if—”

“Georg left supplies for me, Abbi. He came through the ridge in the night.”

Abbi sighed and then attempted a positive tone. “Did you see him? Did he—”

“No, I didn’t. It’s safer this way. Besides,” he chuckled tensely, “I am greatly anticipating the day when I see Georg face-to-face again. I will savor the anticipation until the time is right.”

Abbi nodded her understanding. Their eyes met across the room, but neither of them was able to move. Then, with no warning, Cameron bounded up the steps and gathered her into his arms. “Abbi,” he whispered, holding her tighter than he ever had, “let me love you one more time.”

Cameron made love to her with a desperate passion, calling out her name repeatedly. And Abbi cried. The stillness they shared afterward was eerie, like the calm before a storm that held boundless uncertainty. With purpose they looked into each other’s faces, memorizing every detail, every emotion, every moment they had shared together.

“I don’t want to leave, Cameron,” she whispered. “Let me stay.”

“We’ve discussed all of this before,” he said adamantly. “If we are going to be together, we have to do it right.”

“I know,” she said sadly, “but it’s so hard.”

“All through history men have gone to sea, and to battle, and to make their living, with no choice but to leave behind the women they loved. Surely you and I have the strength to do the same. It will be worth it. One day, my love, we’ll be together without having to hide.”

“I know,” she repeated, and her voice quivered.

“I love you, Abbi,” he kissed her softly with mist in his eyes, “and I pray it will not be too long.”

“I love you too, Cameron,” she replied, touching his face. “I will miss you desperately.” Tears showed again in her eyes. “I must have you in my life. You are a part of me now. You understand that, don’t you?”

“Very well, my love,” he said with conviction, “and I won’t let you down. I will come for you, and we’ll make our marriage official. We need to be together. I’m nothing without you.”

“We’re nothing apart,” she cried.

Cameron touched her face and hair with adoration, and then he swung his legs over the bed and pulled on his breeches and boots.

“Come on, love,” he said soberly. “If we don’t leave now, you won’t make it home before dark.”

Abbi sat up in bed and picked up her sketchbook to thumb through it while he finished getting dressed. It was filled with memories that warmed her, but her desire to take it with her was interrupted by Cameron saying, “I want you to leave that here.”

“But . . . I would never show it to anyone. I need it to—”

“I know you wouldn’t show it to anyone, Abbi. But I don’t want to take any chances of having it fall into the wrong hands. Your friend the captain, for instance.”

“What makes you think I will even be seeing him?”

“He is your aunt’s stepson, is he not?”

“Yes, but—”

“Abbi.” Cameron sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand. When Georg had presented this as part of the plan, he couldn’t deny that it made perfect sense. But now the thought made him a little sick.

“What?” she asked when he didn’t continue.

He drew back his shoulders, seeking courage. “Abbi, I
want
you to see the captain.”

“What?” she gasped, but he only tightened his grip on her hand.

“I want you to see him a great deal. I want you to behave with him as if you have nothing to hide, and nothing to fear. I want you to keep him distracted. The nearer we get to my coming down from here, the more distracted I want him to be. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“I understand,” she said, “but I don’t like it.”

“I don’t like it either!” he shouted for the first time in weeks. She glared at him and his voice softened. “Forgive me. This is not easy. But there is wisdom in it.”

“How do I know that Lance will even show any interest in me at all? Maybe he’s married by now. How can I be sure that—”

“Abbi,” he interrupted firmly, “Georg knows what the captain is doing. He knows the present situation. Just do the best you can. That’s all I ask. But remember,” he looked into her eyes with intensity, “in spite of all pretenses, you
are
a married woman.”

Abbi tossed the book onto the bed. “A married woman flirting with the Captain of the Guard.”

“Within reason,” he admonished. “Just be yourself, Abbi. I’m not asking you to lie beyond what is absolutely necessary to protect us both. I guess what I’m saying is . . . he’s not going to know you’re married. He
can’t
know. And if he has any interest in you whatsoever . . . if you can keep him hanging on even a little, it may work in our favor.”

Abbi sighed. “I’ll do the best I can.”

“That’s all I ask,” he said and stood up. “I’ll get Blaze ready,” he said and left the lodge.

Abbi fought back the urge to cry as she picked up the sketchbook one more time and glanced through it. Impulsively she tore out the picture of Cameron in the window seat. She folded it in half twice and tucked it inside her camisole as she dressed in the clothes she’d come in. Forcing back her fears for the future, she quickly made certain all was in order. After making up the bed, she examined the house carefully to find all the things she had used personally and put them away in the trunk, not wanting to leave obvious memories lying about for Cameron to deal with.

Cameron entered the lodge to find Abbi coming down the stairs, looking around herself as if to absorb her surroundings into her memory. He noticed that she wore exactly what she’d come in, with the exception of the gold bracelet around her wrist.