Being Human (20 page)

“No one knows why the vampires – after over thirty years of silence – have decided to seek human rights. Sympathizers state it is the humane thing to do.”

“Vampires deserve rights! They were human once! They can remember being human and should be treated as such.” a group of sympathizers chanted in another shot.

A scowling human in a black police uniform with a silver 'VF' embroidered on the chest appeared. “The vampire population gave up their human rights with the first life they took,” he stated. “If a mass protest forms again, Vampire Forces will be there to eradicate the parasites and ensure
every
human’s safety.”

The camera turned back to the reporter. “And the debate continues. A bill in Congress would give Vampire Forces complete freedom to destroy vampires. With the recent rise in vampire torching, human deaths and turnings...”

“Daddy?” a scared voice interrupted.

“...many wonder how long the debate will last before Congress decides to pass the bill. In other news, the body of a five year old girl...” the reporter finished the first story and started on the next without losing a breath.

My brother quickly shut the TV off and turned to my niece with a smile. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

“I had a bad dream.”

He gathered her up and settled on the couch. “You made Uncle move.” He quirked a smile at me. “It's unnerving when you stand
all
night.”

“I don't need to sit,” I replied.

My niece giggled into her hand.

I looked back at her. “What was your bad dream about?”

Fear crossed her face. “Bad people. They wanted to get you.”

“No one's going to get Uncle,” my brother said gently.

My niece shook her head. “People wanted to hurt Uncle. They wanted him gone.”

“Who?” Rissa asked.

“The ones on the TV.”

“No one on TV wants to hurt your uncle,” Rissa assured her.

“It's okay,” my niece replied in a solemn voice. “I know Uncle kills people.”

Silence filled the living room. All this time I had been stepping on eggshells, worried about scaring her. My brother and Rissa assured me she would be scared if she knew the whole truth about me. But she wasn't, there wasn't a hint of fear in her scent or any on her face.

She wasn't afraid of me.

“Who told you that?” my brother asked.

“At school,” my niece replied. “We do drills. What to do if a vampire comes. We’re supposed to stay in a group and not let them look in our eyes. Miss Valerie said if a vampire looks in your eyes, the vampire can take your mind! I told her that's not true, that if a vampire looks in your eyes, you get sleepy.” She frowned deeply. “I got put in time out for telling lies.”

“Keep your mouth shut,” my brother warned me before I could ask to kill Miss Valerie. He exchanged a tense look with Rissa, then turned back to my niece. “Does what you know about your uncle bother you?”

My niece shook her head. “Uncle wouldn't hurt us. He loves us. He tells me all the time. He says he even loves Mommy.”

Rissa coughed loudly and her cheeks turned pink. “Mackenzie, do you understand what Tommy is? Why people may not like him?”

“Of course,” my niece intelligently replied. “He's a vampire and it means he gets blood from other people by killing them and people don't like that because they don't understand. It's why I can't tell my friends at school about him.”

Silence filled the living room again.

“Okay.” My brother broke the silence. “As long as you understand. I guess.”

“You won't let anyone hurt Uncle, right?” my niece insisted.

“Well, Uncle is pretty capable of taking care of himself.” He rolled his eyes.

“We'll do our best,” Rissa replied, throwing a glare at him.

My niece's face glowed with happiness. She hugged my brother then Rissa. “Thank you! Thank you! I love you, Mommy and Daddy!”

“Come on, let's get you back to bed.” Rissa half laughed, half sighed. She picked my niece up and turned to me so I could present my cheek for another bedtime kiss.

“I won't let anyone get you,” my niece whispered.

I looked at my brother, trying to comprehend my niece as Rissa took her upstairs. “She can't protect me.”

He sighed. “It has nothing to do with whether or not she can protect you and everything to do with her feelings. She understands you, a lot better than both Rissa and I thought. She understands vampires are caught and destroyed and she's scared someone will catch and destroy you. She doesn't want that. In her mind, telling you she'll make sure no one gets you makes her feel better.”

“I want her to feel happy,” I said.

“I know you do.” He wandered to the kitchen, returned with two beers and handed one to me. “Stop trying to understand humans. The ones who care about you will accept you as you are.” His grinned widened as his voice dropped to a whisper. “Did you really tell Mackenzie you loved Charissa?”

“Yes.”

He stifled a laugh. “Her face was priceless. It took all I had not to bust out laughing at her face.”

“Why?”

****

“
Pssst! Pssst!
Hey you!”

She looked young, only a child. Her hair was blond, hanging past her shoulders, and her eyes dark blue. But for vampires, looks were deceiving. Her child-like face held eyes that, to another vampire, showed age. Wisdom in their depths that said she earned her survival. Her hands were held out, a cautious look on her pale face.

I growled and flashed my teeth when she moved closer.

“I'm not challenging you,” she insisted. “I need to talk to you.”

“You don't need to get closer to talk,” I replied.

“But I do need you,” she said. “You're young, I can see that. You don't know what it was like when the humans didn't know. That can’t be undone, but there is something you can do. You can help. Be a voice. Don't let the humans destroy us anymore.”

“No.”

“We deserve to live.

“Do we?” I challenged. “Or should we have died instead of turn? We can't even remember our human lives.”

“There's a lot about their lives they don't remember either,” she said in an icy voice. “They are violent and hurtful. More than us at times. Why do they get to keep surviving? We deserve the same chance.”

I agreed with that. I believed I deserved a chance to survive, but I saw no point in what this vampire wanted me to do. It only gave Vampire Forces another chance to destroy me. By staying hidden, I was giving myself the chance to survive.

“I will not help you.” I turned to leave.

“I've seen you,” she called. “With the humans. The little one, she is adorable. I had a younger human sibling like her.”

She didn't fight when I grabbed her, letting me slam her against a brick wall and squeeze her neck until I heard bones crunch. “You
had
.”

“She sat with me,” she replied in a whisper. “As I hid in my room, fighting it. The hunger was bad, the need great and the desire overwhelming. I kept telling myself to leave, find another, not knowing why. But I was afraid if I left, I'd forget everything. Not only how to walk and talk, but her. I didn't want to forget her. Even as I forgot.”

“You murdered her?” I asked, my fingers relaxing.

She nodded sadly. “The humans assume because we murder our families that we don’t care and sometimes it feels that way. But when you refer to your family, you say murder and deep down, you regret it. You’d change it if you could. I don’t know how you did it, but I’m impressed. I’ve never met another vampire who didn’t murder their entire family.”

“He is my twin.”

“That doesn't mean much to me.”

“Means everything to me,” I replied and tightened my grip again. “You stay away from me and my family. I want nothing to do with your protests. I will not risk myself or hurt them that way.”

She rubbed her neck when I released her, face showing no signs of discomfort or anger. I backed down the street, reluctant to take my eyes off her, finally turning when I rounded the block. As I dashed away, I heard her voice whispering, “When you change your mind, find me. My name is Amy.”

I didn’t stop running until I was home and in my niece’s room.

Amy’s words bounced in my head. Was it true she murdered her family, but didn’t want to? I always wondered about other vampires and their families. Did they regret murdering their families like I had? If so, then maybe Amy was right. Maybe I should change my mind and help her.

No, that wasn't a possibility. If I protested, I was putting my family at risk. Another human could find out about me, learn my brother spoke with me. They'd think he was a sympathizer. I vowed never to put him through that pain again.

“I won't let anyone get you,” I whispered, carefully brushing a lock of hair off my niece's face.

Faintly, an aroma tickled my nose. Hunger and need rumbled in me, drawing me closer, reminding me of why I had been out. I had been hunting when Amy distracted me.

Now all I smelled was my niece. She had never smelled this good before. Or maybe she had and I had never been around her when I needed blood.

A shudder ran through her when I placed my lips on her neck. Rhythm pulsed hot against me and I fell into it, imagining the way it would push the blood into my mouth. My fangs slid out as my stomach clenched in hunger. I closed my eyes, lost in the desire the rhythm beat out as it picked up its pace.

One small bite
, I thought, my hands holding her head in place. One tiny, little bite to get the blood flowing.

“Ow! Dammit!” My brother's voice rang out after a loud crash down the hallway.

I jerked away, vividly aware of where I was and what I was about to do. Horror, disgust and revulsion slammed into me. I almost bit my niece, almost killed her.

I was a monster!

I whirled around, scrambling to get away. Dark houses and empty streets flashed by as I escaped into the night. I didn't slow until I reached my resting spot, wanting the safety and comfort of the dark cellar and earth. I jumped down, curling up in the corner, pressing my head against my arms and squeezing my eyes shut.

“I didn't do it. My teeth didn’t touch her skin. She's okay,” I whispered.

The words didn't console me. I knew what I had almost done and why. I had fallen into desire. I hadn't wanted my niece’s blood because I needed it. I wanted it because I
desired
it. Nothing else would do. No other blood would satisfy me the way hers would have. If I had.

But I didn't.

But I could have.

That haunted me all day and into the night.

As the first glimmer of energy surged through me, I jumped to action. I raced to the city in search of a human to sate my need and cage my desire. My family would never know what I had almost done. But the human I found paled in comparison to my niece and when it came to the moment, I let her go. I didn't want her blood.

I wandered the city, starving with need and fighting the desire and confusion. Why was my niece tempting me? She was a constant fixture in my life and everything I did was for her safety. Now all I could think of was her blood and how I wanted every drop.

****

My stomach dully ached, my throat felt parched and my legs weak. It had been two weeks since I last fed. Each time I tried, I stopped before my fangs hit flesh and ran. I needed to feed. Hunger and need dominated my thoughts; my survival at risk each second I failed to feed. But stronger than the need to survive was the fear. Fear of what would happen once I tasted the blood.

The blood wouldn't be what I desired. And then what? I find my niece and sate the desire on her blood? I couldn’t do that.

So I starved and avoided my family, digging into the ground far away from my cellar. I knew my brother would go there looking for me, maybe even bring my niece. When the sun set, I wandered the streets of the city, trying to gain enough courage to bite and growing weaker each time I backed away.

I stumbled to a stop, leaning against a large window. On the other side, dozens of TV showed scared eyes. How much longer could I go on like this? Would I drop dead? Permanently? I wanted to survive, but how could I if I was too scared to feed?

I resumed my walk, frequently stopping. If only I could get a little energy back. Maybe if I closed my eyes for just a minute... I jarred myself from that thought. The only way for me to get energy back was with blood.

Resolved to beat the desire, I headed to the part of the city that always had humans awake. Short, shabby buildings lined the streets, rusted cars parked under the unbroken lights. Debris littered the sidewalks and streets. Humans stood in tight groups, casting suspicious glances. I watched them talk, waiting for one to break away. That’s all I needed, one to step away so I could swoop in, grab the human and feed.

“Hey, Darrell,” a human called and separated himself from a group.

I blew out of the shadows like a gale force wind. The force at which I slammed into the human bent him over my shoulder. Behind me, the humans yelled in shock and feet pounded after me. My weakened state kept me from running as fast as I could, but even then the humans chasing stood no chance of catching me.